Transcripts For FOXNEWSW The Five 20201224 : vimarsana.com
FOXNEWSW The Five December 24, 2020
Animals are great. Plus we will do our secret Santa Gift Exchange. You dont want to miss our annual tradition. We invented. First we have been making a list and checking it twice. Lets find out whos on the fives knotty and nice list. Look at that graphic. Spent a lot of time on that one. All right, dana. I am transfixed by juans suit. Juan this was jesses Christmas Gift to me last year. I think its a joke about snowflakes and liberals. But i actually like it. He didnt think i would like it. I am frosty in my neighborhood. I am jack frost. Greg i think we found someone worse you can give someone besides covid, that suit. [laughter] dana, with your naughty and nice list . Was it hard for you to do a naughty list . Dana no. I had to narrow it down. I noticed juans outfit and i noticed yours, yours is not very festive. My naughty and nice list, i went with the Chinese Communist party on the naughty list. I think for obvious reasons. For unleashing this virus on the world, for being reckless with global health. And for the economic pain that it is because everyone. Just awful, awful behavior. On the nice list, i had a chance to go to a food parenti in new jersey food pantry. I met ladies and you can see them on the screen. They volunteer every week. They do to distributions, one on mondays and one on saturdays. They asked for no credit. These are the most humble women. The whole time we were there filming they never stop working. I was super inspired by them. And i think them for what they do. Greg and its all volunteer. They are not there by force, are they . Dana no. That would be on the naughty list. Greg just wanted to make that clear. I would hate to find out later that you are actually promoting some kind of strange cult. Dana no. Greg juan, its your turn, unless you want to discuss dana. Juan actually i thought that was pretty cool. I think those people are doing really great work. Hats off to them. Santas hat if i had one. On my naughty list, im going to go over something thats a little smaller than danas. Joe exotic. I think joe exotic and the whole idea of mistreating animals and making animals into sort of toys not to be well treated, not to be abiding by their nature. I think its just wrong and i just cant stand it and i hate to even think about it because there are people who have exotic pets. I hope they treat them better than this and i hope they dont put them on display in ways that endanger their lives. To me, joe exotic belongs on the naughty list this year. Greg thats a good one. Whats your nice . Juan its going to be teachers. Teachers have had to go through really hard work in order to help our kids. This whole notion of virtual learning, going over the ipad, social media efforts. Its been very difficult. Its difficult for kids but i think youve got to understand its required teachers to adapt to changes and of course it even includes what youre seeing on the screen, how to say hello to kids without a hug and let them know that you do care that teachers are there for them when they get back to school. For me, a special, special Christmas Wish and blessings for teachers. Greg very good. Its my turn. My naughty and nice list. Lets do naughty first. Poor mans abbott and costello. I think you know why they are on my naughty list. Lets roll. This was the actual swab that was being used to fit up that Double Barrel shotgun that youve mounted on the front of your pretty face. The official reentry from the basement, cleared by cdc. Do you think that you are an attractive person no because youre single and ready to mingle . Do you really think you are some desirable Single Person of the this not just peoples pain coming out of them . I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Greg so is competence, i guess. Hes the governor of new york. Youre doing some comedy stick while people are dying in rest homes. Not a good look. My nice list. Its similar to danas. She probably stole my idea but im going to give it to the fundraiser organizers and people like our viewers at home who reacted these fundraisers. When we mentioned the officer shot during a protest and paralyzed, we mentioned it on the five and it raised hundreds of thousands of dollars. Almost a million i think. And then a couple that was killed visiting their veteran sons grave in a cemetery in delaware and we mentioned it again on the five. The money poured into help pay for the funerals. Its really amazing. The gofundme organization has made it easier for people to do this. The people who organize this out of the goodness of their hearts. And then you guys at home will react and just start pulling out your money. Its something really, really special. There you go. Whos next . Emily. Hello, emily. Emily hello, you all. On my naughty list, heading it up is congress. For their continued incompetence and inability to compromise on behalf of the american people. There is not enough coal for that hill in my opinion. In terms of the nice list, hit heading it up for me as every Small Business owner out there and their families including and especially my dad. Thats him behind the counter of our winery. May santa and Congress Bring you all everything that you need. Greg when are we going to you or winery . Emily any time you are always welcome. Greg yeah, right. Sorry, jesse. Juan i can attest to the quality of that wine. Its quite good. Greg jesse, speaking of wine, whats your naughty and nice list . Jesse my naughty list is hunter obviously. My nice list, Jesse Watters tops that. We will begin with hunter. Its obvious from the escorts to the strippers to the sex trafficking to the drudge, bullfighting of the child support, he basically was responsible for getting donald trump impeached with his shenanigans in ukraine and may be responsible for getting his w administration. Hunter takes the cake. Hopefully by the time this airs hes not behind bars. In terms of the nice list, i may be have misread this segment but im going to go with it. Im going to choose myself. Im going to speak from the heart. I think i had a great year. I was nice to my cohost. I was tender and loving with regards to my analysis of people who i dont share their political opinions. Ive matured as a person and i think everybody recognizes it so i go on the nice list. Greg the only way you could be on the nice list was having hunter biden on the naughty list. Just by the comparison. You win. All right. Jesse im going to ask dana to hold my hand and squeeze it if i go down the wrong path. If dana will virtually hold my hand here. Am i doing okay so far . Sometimes i feel like the sailor on the show, clinging for dear life, hoping someone will come rescue me. When i was about to Say Something controversial, i would ask for you to hold my hand and squeeze it. We cant reach anymore. I have a solution. Dana okay. Jesse before i Say Something controversial. I will ask you to squeeze my what do i call this . [laughter] oh, it was nice to look back and see us all together like that around the table. Maybe that will happen one of these days. Greg hopefully soon. Dana it will. Greg all right. Coming about, our amazing secret Santa Gift Exchange that you do not want to miss. First we will face off in a christmas edition of supermarket showdown. Thats when we come back. [ engines revving ] its amazing to see them in the wild like th shhh. [ engine revs ] for those who were born to ride, theres progressive. Were going to find the perfect tree. Were going skating. 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Welcome to my house the croods are coming home. Kinda big, isnt it . Thats the mirror. Sorry. And the world will never be the same. What is this . Uh, we call that a window. Window. Dun, dun, dun. Make it a croods family movie night with the croods a new age. Go to watchcroods. Com. Dana welcome back. Its time for a special christmas edition of supermarket showdown. Thats right. Thats right. Were battling it out over the prices of some of our favorite christmas items. Whoever guesses the closest without going over is the winner. A reminder, i do not know the answers in advance. First up, mistletoe. I have no idea how much mistletoe costs but everybody write down your answers on your boards. Im going to say. I really dont have a good idea. One, two, three. Greg do you remember how you get mistletoe . Dana no. Greg its a parasite that lives in trees and you actually have to get it down with a shotgun. You have to shoot it down with a shotgun. In oregon is where it comes from. What is it . Oh. Its dana. Dana i won. Greg oh, i dont know the stuff in advance. Liar. Dana 15. 99. I have no idea and ive never bought mistletoe. Greg women never have to buy it its always the guys. Jesse you know what you call a woman who buys mistletoe. Greg stop it. Dana let me hold your hand, jesse. Let me hold your hand. Number two. Juan i bet theres not much of a market for mistletoe this year. Dana there might not be. This is a 2020 covid ornament. 2020 covid ornament. How much with this cost at the store if you want to the store or if you bought it online . One, two, three. Go. All right. Greg i was over by 3. Dana juan won. Emily, you thought that was 18 . Emily i was thinking personalized. It had peoples names on it. California. I feel like everything dana i hear you. Emily imploded. Dana i hear you. The third one is a festive mask. Oh, my goodness. Greg that doesnt look like a mask. Dana i dont think i would wear that. Im not against masks. Greg a holiday medical bag. Thats festive. It looks like you have you are like a creepy mardi gras clone. Clown. You have a follicular disorder. Dana jesse. You are like, this is an expense of item to you. Jesse made in china. Dana juan really gave it a lot of thought. Lets see what the answer is. 5. Jesse wins jesse nailed it. Greg emily, you have to keep it on the whole show. Emily no. Jesse give it to juan. It would be nice with his suit. Emily its not a muzzle. Its a mask. Im not keeping it on. Dana your next one everybody. And lol surprised dog. I think jesse is probably going to get this right. I dont know. I dont know what a surprise doll is. Greg i do but its only in amsterdam. Dana its a hot toy. All right. How much is this hot toy. Greg i am over again. Emily walked . Dana [laughs] jesse i was closer. Dana i didnt know was a hot toy but now that i do, i will get one for this little girl i know. Jesse that was my nickname in high school. Hot toy. Dana lawn decoration. Lawn decoration. Emily is that the big thing that was in the hallway . Dana anything with a dog. Greg do you have to inflate it . Is it inflatable . Emily something in the hallway. Dana 58 . Emily isnt it the really big thing that was down by 43 . Dana jesse wins again. Jesse they are bigger than they appear on the screen. [laughter] dana okay, okay, okay. A 7pound spiral ham. Greg ooh. Dana i love a christmas ham. Ill tell you that much. Greg makes fun of me for liking ham. Greg i love him. Dana didnt you make fun of me for giving a ham . Jesse no way. No way. [laughter] no, no, no. A spiral ham. It was a lot more. Dana i dont know how much they cost when you order if you order from honeybaked h ham. Greg they gouge you. Emily nice. Greg, you and i are losers unfortunately. Greg i just dont buy groceries. I buy everything at walgreens. I go into walgreens with a buzz and thats where i eat my dinner. I get cookies and crackers. I can tell you how much zquil is. And a few other things. Dana dont go anywhere. Our first ever holiday dish in a feeding frenzy. Stay with us. May your holidays glow bright and all your dreams take flight. Visit your local mercedesbenz dealer today for exceptional lease and financing offers at the mercedesbenz winter event. [narrator] this is steve. He used to have gum problems. Now, he uses therabreath healthy gums oral rinse with clinicallyproven ingredients and his gum problems have vanished. crowd applauding therabreath, its a better mouthwash. At walmart, target and other fine stores. Merry Christmas Eve from fox news in washington. Im mike emanuel. The five continues but first a special report newsbreak. High drama today. House democrats tried to put forth a measure to increase the stimulus amount to 2,000, something President Trump says he wants. House republicans would not support the effort so it was rejected. It remains unclear if the president will sign a stimulus package without the increase. Cybersecurity officials are warning local municipalities they may be victims of a cyber attack that targeted several federal agencies less than a week ago. Officials warning they still dont know the full extent of the hack. The National Weather service is predicting a wide range of hazardous weather for much of the country through christmas. Blizzards have already struck the midwest. Stay safe, everyone. Ill be back at 6 00 p. M. Eastern for a live special report. Back to the five. Jesse merry christmas, everybody. Its time now for our very first ever Holiday Edition of jesses feeding frenzy with a twist. This time, each of us is going to sample some very, very bizarre holiday treats and we are going to start with a mint chocolate twinkie. All right, everybody, dig in. Do you want me to read you some of the ingredients here . Greg i dont think its good to know. Emily no thank you. Dana i am scared. Emily cream in the center. Jesse dana, i will have you know this includes 29 grams of added sugar. Emily wait, no one wants to hear that. Jesse 250 calories. Greg for this little thing . This has got more sugar than a huge glass of red wine. I can to be okay with this. Jesse greg. Emily its good. Jesse 60 of your daily value of sugar. You basically cant have any sugar for the rest of the day after you eat one of these. Emily but 100 of your christmas cheer. Dana good answer, emily. Juan actually tastes pretty good. Jesse you like it, juan . Juan i do. Jesse juan will eat anything. We know that. Juan i thought this was mint and twinkies and chocolate. I thought it was going to be of bit much but its tasty. Jesse good. It has juans endorsement. Lets go to the goldfish. These are hot cocoa grahams. Dana i like these. Greg they still have the yellow goldfish on the cover. Why couldnt the fish be brown . Something weird going on. Jesse they are brown at the bottom. Are you making a racial comment . Greg yes, i am. Its a terrible way of doing it. You need to make the fish brown. Dana i like it. Emily exactly what it says on the cover. Putting it into hot chocolate. A little bit of whiskey. Whipped cream on the top. Its perfect. Thats christmas. Dana does anybody notice those marshmallows in here like lucky charms . Greg i did. You didnt know that. Jesse dana perino. You know more about the feeding frenzy than i do. Very good. So those are the winners so far. Greg this is disgusting. Jesse left transition. What are these, marshmallows . They are marshmallows, people. Cocoa marshmallows with pink peppermint inside. Bite all the way through. Dana it cant be good. Greg. [laughs] greg that was absolutely disgusting, and i love. I love sweets. Dana no, no. Emily this is delicious. Juan doesnt work. Greg its terrible. Jesse they are sponsoring our show, people. Greg emily, everything but youth say tastes good goes into hot chocolate. Thats not how you cover up something bad. Emily i think its amazing. Dana i would put this in hot chocolate with some peppermint schnapps. Emily of course. Jesse juan, you are making a face. Did we check the Expiration Date on these . Not for sale past. December 2018. Greg [laughs] jesse well done, producers. Lets finish this off. We have a tootsie pop. Its a candy cane flavored tootsie pop. Greg this one . Jesse wow. Sabotaged again by the producers. Here we go. Heres the candy cane. It doesnt look greg oh, my goodness. Oh, thats terrible it tastes like pizza. It is disgusting. Jesse that is disgusting. Greg that is absolutely disgusting. [laughter] juan i dont want to try that. Greg its like you check your oil and then you stick it in your mouth. Jesse i am on the naughty list for some reason. Oh, my god. Juan, youve got to try it. Dana reminds me of when juan its like, you know. Its a circle. Dana reminds me of a jelly belly. Emily i will eat these all day. Dana you remember when jelly bellies came out. I gave my mom and jelly bean and waited for her reaction and i had given her the hot buttered popcorn one. She was not happy. Greg you should put that in your next book, dana. Its a great story. Dana life lessons. Jesse we are all going to get sick in the commercial break. But we are going to be right back with a christmas themed animals are great. Later, our biggest secret santa reveal ever when our Christmas Eve special continues. S your Home Insurance, heres something you shouldnt try at home. Look, Liberty Mutual customizes Home Insurance so we only pay for what we need. Its pretty cool. That is cool grandma very cool. Only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Essential for sewing, but maybe not needles. For people with certain inflammatory conditions. Because there are options. Like an unjection™. Xeljanz. 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This child is not for sale. You cant have her and im taking her home. The only thing a disaster cant destroy is hope. Donate now at redcross. Org animals are great animals are great animals are great emily welcome back. Its time for a christmas themed animals are great. Greg, youre the king of the animal video so why dont you kick us off. Greg i am. I always like it when animals are tricked by things that arent really alive. This little fella, this pug is completely freaked out by whats clearly a musical santa toy. This is not a smart dog. Or maybe it is a smart dog. I like pugs because they break more wind than i do. They are known for that. They have energy. Thats my Holiday Edition of animals are great. Vote for it. Emily dana, see if you can top that. Dana i think youre going to like this. This is phoebe. Shes a boxer. She is in aurora, colorado, and she got a piece of ice and look at what she can figure out how to do with it. She knows how to ice skate. [laughter] she loves it. All she wants is for her owner to give her some ice and shes on her way. Greg i dont know. Mines better. Emily potential limbic champion. Jesse, whats yours. Jesse thats a tough act to follow, dana. But i will give it my best. I too have a pug. I think its a pug. I have no idea. Ive only seen the video wants. Its a pug skateboarding. I dont know where hes going. Its a French Bulldog. What do i know . Hes got very flashy pink sparkly. It looks like perez hilton. Greg thats cheating. I think its a Remote Control skateboard. Dana shes not pushing it. You can tell. Greg and owner with the phone is directing it. This is animal cruelty. Emily its a skill. Jesse French Bulldog fraud. Emily all right, juan, whats yours . Juan since i am dressed as jack frost, let me show you dogs actually, handicapped dogs pulling studs trickle sled through the snow. It was incredible. I like the idea that these guys have been rescued and loved and cared for despite their handicap. They have gotten ability. They are showing off. Perfect for christmas. Greg forcing handicapped dogs to pull other animals seems like, i dont know. That doesnt seem wrong . Juan they were pulling their own weight. They were having fun. Greg i am writing a letter to their owner, and angry lett letter. Emily handicapable three for the grand finale, mine. I am breaking the mold. Its not a dog. Its a cat and this is what cats do. 33 oh, boy. Oh, boy. Emily they destroy. Exactly. Dana then he runs off. Greg somebody was filming it so they knew it was happening. I smell a set up. Emily vote for myself. Who do you vote for . Greg even though it was a fraud, i will go with jesses. It was good video. Emily dana. Dana i love phoebe from colorado. Ive got to go with eb. Emily jesse, your vote . Jesse i am tempted to vote for griggs because he voted for mine but to be honest i thought danas was pretty good. Emily all right. Juan to whom do you give the gold medal two. I like the dog on a skateboard. Greg says its a fraud but i have to take into account but that dog is pretty skilled to get up there and hang on. Greg i think it is dominion controlling that skateboard. Emily okay, make sure to head over to the the five Instagram Page to vote on your favorite video. The wait is almost over. Our secret Santa Gift Exchange comes when we return. Narrow to those whose dogs. Also fit under the bed. No, not that one. Ok, that one. Meaning, you. Youre the one we made mywalgreens for. With pickup in as little as 30 minutes. To make saving, shopping, and holiday chaos. Easier. Introducing mywalgreens. Join at walgreens. Com. Stores open Christmas Day. [narrator] as many of the. Nations most trusted hospitals, we all know this. The science has not changed. Masks slow the spread of covid19. Every one of our Healthcare Professionals is asking you to do one very simple thing. Lets keep it up. Lets mask up. solemn orchestral music ends juan welcome back. Its the moment weve all been waiting for. Its the moment youve been waiting for. Our secret Santa Gift Exchange. I want to kick it off and open my gift first. Here is my gift number one. Its like, you know, Christmas Eve. Youre rushing under the tree if youre a kid, even if youre an adult. What did i get . Its a bird. Its a bird. [laughter] thats pretty cool. Heres my second gift. Heres my second gift. Hey, its a plane. Dana very good. C7 its a bird. Its a plane. If youre a fan of the show, you get the joke. My third gift. I think this could fly high. Its tequila. That will warm you. Emily thats a great gift. Jesse you have to do something for me. You have to say its a bird. Its a plane. Its tequila. Juan jesse, anything to make your Christmas Day. Its a bird. Its a plane. Hey, its really tequila. [laughs] oh, i thought there was one last gift. Its something from my washington football team, a hat. Thank you, guys. Okay, dana, europe. Dana i have three gifts, cute wrapping paper. Can i say a big thanks to the producers who figured out how to get all of us are gifts here remotely appreciated. We went over and beyond. Greg always a teachers pet. Dana oh, its plush toys for dogs. I think its for me but. Very cute. I love it. Number two. Weve got a lot of people here. I feel like jesse wants to come and clean up my compartment here. Jesse i do. Greg yes [laughter] yes. Jesse its so big it doesnt fit over your face. Greg so many comments no one can say. So we will just say. Dana no one can say. No one can say. Greg there was another one. There was another mask. There was another mask and there. Do you think i would forget jasper. Dana im sorry. I was so flustered. That mask. Greg, did you get one for yourself. Also thank you, greg. For the cities so that i can learn about real music for the first time in my life. Greg what you have got is that collection. Dana anthrax. Slayer. Greg power trip. Dana jesse, soon as i download these to my cassette tape, i will hand them over to you. Greg you also have the new mr. Bungle album the raging wrath of the easter bunny. These are the four best thrash metal cds out right now. Dana i love it. Juan i think theres going to be a Dumpster Fire outback the house tonight. Greg, europe. Greg this is pretty heavy. Dana that was pretty funn funny. While he opens, i will put this back on. Juan i love that mask, dana. Greg this is box one. I think you going to have to speed this up. This is serious. Juan you cant get in. Dana make it like fast walking. Use those muscles. Juan theres got to be a pony in there somewhere. Greg its beef jerky. Oh, my god. What is this . Dana [laughs] greg what the hell is thi this . A drone. Who got me this . I got pork. Dana ill tell you what it is. You put it under your desk and you can pedal away while youre at the office. Greg premium summer sausage. Now youre talking my language. This is crazy stuff. Juan greg. Greg ive got one more box. Juan wait, greg. Youve got to react to the bike under the desk. Ive never seen anything like that. Are you going to use it . Emily for the peloton king. Greg of course ill use it. Its exactly what i hoped for and dreamed of. I hope this is not. Is difficult to open dana jesse. All the wrapping paper everywhere. Juan no, its not my house. If it was my house. Id be having anxiety. What is it . Greg its a peloton jacket. Wow. Dana so cool. Come on. Greg wow. After my workouts when i want to go to the coffee shop, this is what i will wear and i will sip coffee outside and feel like im better than everyone else in my peloton jacket. Juan you know what. Lets give credit to greg. He actually uses peloton. He has gotten pretty good shape. We are going to take a quick break. Jesse. Greg we have run out of time for emily juan its coming up. After the break. After the break easily and automatically pay your team and file payroll taxes. That means. World domination or just the west side. Run payroll in less than five minutes with intuit quickbooks. Damom, look get sare you okay . . Head home this holiday with the one you love. Visit your local mercedesbenz dealer today for exceptional lease and financing offers at the mercedesbenz winter event. I had this hundred thousand dollar student debt. Two hundred and twentyfive thousand dollars in debt. Ah, sofi literally changed my life. It was the easiest application process. Sofi made it so theres no tradeoff between my dreams and paying student loans. Student loans dont have to take over for the rest of your life. Thank you for allowing me to get my money right. All right. We are back with more of our secret Santa Exchange with jesse and emily. Who goes first, jesse . Lets make emily last as usual. Ill go first. Dont you love to just rip oh silk eagles bathrobe youre welcome oh, man. I should actually wear this next show we do like williams did with his snowflake jacket. I will be wearing this. Thank you very much and i will have something on under it, i promise. Over your suit. No, not over a suit. Gift number two. Ed already fell out of the wrapping. Whoever wrapped this, emily, did a terrible job, but thank you. Im not surprised because i saw this earlier today. An eagles onesie. How cute. I had the same one. For your new baby. So disgusting. So jesse, i played with getting exactly and i toyed with giving you raiders diapers because then you know, theres a hole like the team that you dont like him he put them on, or then your baby would be wrapping, so i went with a safety with a safety one. Those would have been cowboys diapers in the nfc. Juan knows. At last one from emily. Thank you, these are great so far. Youre welcome. Its not heavy metal cds. Something i will actually use. Yes, because you said during covid that youve gotten into skincare, so we thought that this would be, you know, to go with your new regimen. Im so glad you brought that up again on television. Thank you so much, emily. I cant wait to apply all of the masks in the creams and the d ring colors. Thank you so much, im serious, merry christmas. Very good. All right, emily, is it you . Okay, so this is the first one. Oh, my god, how cute, you guys these are totally great oh, my god they say number one fan. These are amazing comedies are totally perfect i literally i literally watched christmas movies on the channel all the time. This is fantastic. You guys, amazing and literally, you just hit for the cycle right there. Im so excited i thought i think thats you. I can see you on the couch with the hallmark christmas movies. Its pure heaven. Your amazing you totally nailed the gift with this thank you so much thank you. So my second one, this says number two. Lynn door on the outside. Chocolates irresistibly oh, my god, amazing. Delicious also gift recipient ive ever seen. She could be i love gifts thank you so much and the number three. If you gave her a call. If you give her call should be like great great Energy Energy to power my electric car because im grateful, great and i like juan. And hes nice to me. There you go. Its a santa for duchess just what i always wanted what is it . Its a toy for duchess. Oh, your dog. And it is oh, its an outfit oh, my god. Oh, my god, and santa is going to write also its totally like that scene in labyrinth, you are a number little moppet oh, my god, this is amazing this is going to be historical. Ill make sure to take tons of pictures. Thank you so much, you guys. Merry christmas that was great thats it for us. We are out of time. We will see you back here tomorrow for our Christmas Day fan mail special. Merry christmas, everyone. The fate of a Coronavirus Relief package is in jeopardy tonight after House Republicans object to increasing direct payments. Plus, extreme weather blows into the east as americans prepare to celebrate christmas and speaking of christmas, how some are spreading typical christmas cheer in an atypical year. This is special report. Good evening, welcome to washington and merry Christmas Eve. I am mike emanuel in for bret baier. President trump is spending Christmas Eve at maralago in south florida is the status of the next round of covid relief remains in limbo and even though its the season of giving, stimulus checks for millions of americans are on