Years they say, she is so nice. Reporter the secrets no one came out i went to betty ford. Reporter the strength and struggle behind that gladiator smile. The diabetes, your divorce, your son, did you ever think, this is insupportable . Reporter and the lifechanging part in ordinary people that finally laid bare that dark side. The whole movie is about the loss of a son, then that happened. Very reminiscent of my own life. Reporter hats off in minneapolis today for the legend who made it, after all. Good evening, im david muir. And im elizabeth vargas. She was the woman millions of people welcomed into their homes every saturday night, and into their hearts forever. Mary tyler moore, dying at the age of 80 from heart problems related to pneumonia. Behind the laughs, she had great pain, and personal heartbreak. So, tonight, a special tribute to Mary Tyler Moore. Stories from her friends, and your favorite episodes. And also, her greatest regret, which had nothing to do with showbusiness. Reporter Mary Tyler Moore dazzled us with her dancing, made us keel over in laughter and, like the song says, turned the whole world on with her smile. Mary tyler moore was, without question, one of the most influential actresses in television history. All you need to say was one word, mary. Everybody knew who you were talking about. Reporter she ripped up the Television Comedy rule book and rewrote the chapter on women. Im upset, and youre just ignoring it. Well, i figured it was just one of those woman things. Mr. Grant, its not. She was actually one of the first to portray a modern woman on television. She reaches right out through the television set, says, you know, i gotcha. I think Mary Tyler Moore has probably had more influence on my career than any other Single Person or force. She was the first character to make people laugh by being good at her job. Lucille ball made us laugh by being bad when she was trying to work. Speed it up Mary Richards made you laugh by handling the egoes and insecurities of the guys she worked with. Reporter but to understand just how mary was able to make it after all, you have to rewind to brooklyn in the 1930s, where right from the start mary set herself apart from the rest. I was born in brooklyn. And when youre from brooklyn, youre supposed to talk like youre from brooklyn, right . You know what i mean . Well, my family had no money, but they did both major in english in college and they taught me how to speak correctly. Reporter her early life is a difficult one, with an alcoholic mother and a distant father. For solace young mary turned to dancing, working hard at limbering up the legs that would one day carry her to hollywood. My grandfather once said, having watched me one entire afternoon, prancing and leaping, this child will either end up on stage or in jail. Reporter and when her family decides to go west, moving to california, 9year old mary is the first one out the door. I knew i would be discovered in hollywood, it wasnt likely to happen in brooklyn. Reporter at 18, in an act of rebellion, mary marries her first husband, a salesman nearly ten years her senior. She would later explain why to Barbara Walters. Why did you get married so young . Well, you know, i dont want to denigrate my parents. But i was going through a stage at about 16,17, 18, where i didnt like them very much and i really wanted to be independent. I didnt want to be told what to do. Reporter in 1955, mary breaks into show business as a dancing pixie. But Hotpoint Appliances goes cold on mary after she gets pregnant. There i was, not looking very much like the logo they had in mind. Reporter after the birth of son richie, she turns to acting. She told our diane sawyer in 1993 it was her only option. You really think you would have gone in a completely different trajectory . If i hadnt become an actress i think i probably would have been homeless. I really dont think theres very much else in life i was prepared to do. But i was disciplined. Reporter that discipline would carry mary to her big break. In 1961 when shes called in to audition for the Dick Van Dyke show. Legendary comedian carl reiner was the shows creator. She said the first line, and i heard this sound in her voice, a ping in her voice. My hand became the claw in that machine that picks out candy in the, at the, you know, the arcades. I walked across the room. In the middle of the scene, he put his hand on my head, sitting on a chair across from him, and said, get up. I got up, and he steered me down the hall to sheldon leonards office. And i said, sheldon, i got her. The Dick Van Dyke show. Reporter but her onscreen husband Dick Van Dyke isnt as sure. She was 23 when she came on the show and had never done any comedy. I knew i was in with a bunch of black belts in comedy and i had no real experience at it. Reporter even if mary herself was a little unsure, america wasnt. It fell in love with her portrayal of the feisty and funny housewife laura petrie. Are you looking for something . What makes you think of that . She just got it so quickly. And im still fascinated by how fast she grew on that show. Reporter but as her career takes off, marys personal life stumbles when her first marriage fails. She turns to carl reiner for support. Reporter i was her father figure becaus her father was a noncommunicative man who didnt know how to talk to her. She was 16 years old before he ever gave her a compliment and she was going to her prom with a prom dress. He looked at her and he said mary, you look very handsome. Imagine a beauty like that getting that as your only compliment. Reporter on the show, reiner encourages her to bring parts of herself to the role. The big objection was the pants that she wore. I had seen too many housewives on television that were vacuuming in high heels and a floral printed frock and i said wait a minute, thats not the way it really is. I want it to represent something of me and i was married and a mother and wore pants. Oh, rob. Reporter that familiar line that would become her catchphrase. Just two words that could say so much. People were saying that even if their husbands werent rob. Reporter as her confidence grows, mary finds both popular success and critical acclaim. The winner is Mary Tyler Moore. Reporter winning her first two emmy awards for the show. But far more gratifying for her personally was the respect of one particular peer. Gee, im glad youre home. How about a great big see you later. Lucille ball was our landlady. She owned desilu and wed be rehearsing on the set and wed hear a laugh. Wed look up and there she was on the catwalk. And shed be up there watching us. And i will never forget one day she walked out of the studio and came back, and said youre very good. And then walked on. That was the greatest gift i ever received in this business. Reporter the Dick Van Dyke show ran for five seasons before going off the air in 1966. It was the end of a family. The family that i never felt comfortable with as a child i suddenly felt at home with this bunch of people. Reporter and by now she had married a second time, to an advertising executive named grant tinker. Together, the couple was about to transform the tv landscape. What nobody saw coming was that she would be front and center on one of the most formative shows in television history. This was a seismic change. Reporter stay with us. Ok can we. Sfx balloon squeals im being so serious right now. I really want to know how your coffee is. Its. 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Its time to reimagine the smart phone. Snap on a speaker. A projector. A camera that actually zooms. Get excited world. The moto z with motomods. Get 50 off on moto z droid. Thats your underwearstrong, dude. Cleaner. So clean. Keeps you could wear them a second day. Charmin ultra strong. Its 4 times stronger, and you can use less enjoy the go with charmin. Reporter when the cameras stop rolling on the Dick Van Dyke show, Mary Tyler Moore takes a gamble. Makes a break for broadway and accepts what seems to be the perfect role. Audrey hepburns Holly Golightly in a staged adaptation of the classic film breakfast at tiffanys. Thats mary, along side her young and sprightly leading man, richard chamberlain. That was your one venture into broadway and it seemed to have everything. It sure did. It was just a super duper flop. Super duper. Reporter as marys dreams on the great white way quickly fade, the resilient actress decides to take her dance steps to the Silver Screen. I must study you if im going to be an actress. She did have a pretty nice role in thoroughly modern millie, which was opposite julie andrews. It showcased her wonderful skills. Reporter but just as the young ingenue is about to regain her stride, her next role opposite Elvis Presley has the actress reciting a whole lot of hail marys. She did play a nun, hence the change of habit title. Reporter the film change of habit hits far from gold at the box office. It would turn out to be the kings last dramatic role in a movie and marys last appearance on the Silver Screen for more than a decade. Mary tyler moores career kind of bumped around here and there for a while aimlessly. Reporter then, the woman who dazzled the world as laura petrie is asked to reunite with her former costar in a television variety special called Dick Van Dyke and the other woman. We showcased her. She danced, we did sketches. You remember when i said id like you to come on my special . And you said how long was it, and i said an hour . Yeah. Well, its up. Reporter the show is a ratings getter. The Network Brass quickly offer mary her own sitcom bearing her name. Reporter her partner in the project . Grant tinker. The husband and wife team collaborate on a comedy about a decidedly single woman by the name of Mary Richards. Mary richards was actually originally intended to be a divorced woman. And cbs hated this idea. They said, people dont want to see divorced People Television any more than they want to see people with mustaches, jews or people from new york. Reporter marys character is eventually retooled. On saturday, september 19th, 1970, as a nation is embroiled in antiwar protests, the Mary Tyler Moore show debuts on the tiffany network. So youre low lola . Yes. And im Mary Richards. The Mary Tyler Moore show came on television when i was just 12 or 13 years old. The opening sequence of that show. You had sort of the fear and trepidation of driving to a new city and starting a job with people you didnt know. And it made me think, hey, i could do that. I could have a career. Reporter cbs at first fears a show about a single woman juggling home and work a woman who drives the quintessential muscle car, a ford mustang, will fail to attract an audience. They wonder if the sitcom will resonate with the stereotypical stayathome american housewife. This show was not an instant hit at all. What nobody saw coming was that she would be on a show that would reshape the way women were portrayed on television. What would you say if the station manager kept trotting in people and saying, this is our woman executive . But would reshape the way viewers thought of themselves and thought about women in the workplace. Reporter an associate producer employed in the fictitious newsroom wjm, the character of Mary Richards has her share of runins with her rough and tumble boss, lou grant. There was one scene when mary went to mr. Grant and said i would like to know why the last associate producer before me made 50 a week more than i do. And lou grant looked up at her and said because he was a man. I mean they were dealing with pay equity before anyone even understood the term. Reporter as the show builds a budding audience, the Mary Tyler Moore show also begins knocking down taboos on television, like Birth Control dont forget to take your pill. I wont. I wont. That was really unheard of in the early 70s, but so funny. And as lou grant said you know what . Youve gone spunk. Well i hate spunk. One of my favorite moments was when she told ted baxter will you shut up, ted . Every woman who had to deal with an egotistic, bombastic, conceited coworker, they were giving her a standing ovation at that moment. Reporter but as forward thinking as the show is for its day, feminists, like gloria steinem, arent fawning over the show. Or, for that matter, the new fresh face of feminism. Next to Something Like all in the family or good times or the jeffersons or any number of these shows, it mightve looked like it was avoiding the issues on everybodys mind in the early 1970s. Feminists kind of really picked her apart a little bit for being not quite feminist. They wanted her to be the perfect feminist, and she wasnt. She called her boss mr. Grant, when everyone else called him lou. Reporter but as the book mary and lou and rhoda and ted points out, the sitcom is quietly breaking ground in another way, behind the scenes. They also hired more women than any other show before it. Reporter female writers, who know a thing or two about sex and the single girl. What do you think youre doing . Put on your shirt. Come on, mary. Put on your shirt you value that writing. You never take it for granted, because it doesnt happen that often. Hello . Reporter what they never could imagine, is that they are about to pave the way for future, aspiring comedy writers like lena dunham, amy schumer and tina fey. If you call yours, ill call mine. Reporter because before anyone ever heard of carrie, miranda, samantha and charlotte, there was mary, phyllis, sue anne and rhoda. The show was brilliant because mary is who you want to be, who you wish you were. Rhoda is who you probably are, and phyllis is who you are afraid youll become. And thats pretty close to the truth. Because if you push me, then i just might have to push back. Hard. Come on, you cant carry that off. I know. Reporter but the Mary Tyler Moore show did push back. She went out on a date and stayed out all night. Reporter challenging the premise, who says you cant be single and alone but not lonely. You thought, well, who needs a boyfriend . I mean, great if it happens, but who needs a guy to orient your life around . Take care of yourself . I think i just did. 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