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House, the crime scene. and then four hours later, i was sitting in a defense attorney's office to talk about paris. >> charity lee remembers visiting her son that morning, less than 24 hours after he murdered ellen. >> how was it? >> very cold. when i saw him, the only thing i felt was so happy to see my child. because he was the only one left. i started hugging him and just crying and cried forever. and then i realized that at some

And it remains to be seen whether we can bleach it out. >> you see yourself? say hey, baby. >> paris has served 12 of his 40-year sentence. nearly half of his life in prison. he's willing to reflect on the terrible night that he stabbed his little sister. >> was there any satisfaction? >> no. i thought there might be. but there wasn't. >> what was there? >> a very deep sense that i had ruined everything. and i think part of my inability to shed tears is sometimes i wonder whether people are still going to question whether they're real or not. >> charity has done her best to move forward from t...

Picks up the phone straightens my day. even when it's crooked. >> would she ever have anything to fear from you if you weren't here? >> no. >> charity isn't so sure. she plans to never let paris meet his new half-brother. >> you in fact have personal concerns for your safety and the safety of others if he were out. >> yes. yes, yes. i wrote a victim impact statement and said i think my son is dangerous and i think if he was to be released he would hurt somebody, he would be dangerous. >> charity is determined to not live in the horror of the past or in fear of the future. >> this is the humble...

>> a kitchen knife and it was laying in bed. >> were you able to be shocked that man, this is a cute little innocent kid who did this most grizzlies murder, basically unimaginable. >> it looks deceiving. >> i want you to start cpr, okay? >> take her off the bed. >> i know for a fact that she's dead because i stabbed her. >> you want to go ahead and try, it may still help, okay? >> i don't think -- >> come on, work with me. >> i know i stabbed her a lot of times. >> we are talking about a four-year-old victim. she's got little pajamas on. her name is ella bennett. a four years old with a love o...

And whether it is acceptable to cause somebody to feel afraid. >> i have asked that child so many times if i can figure a way to have an fmri done, would he participate in it? he would not do it. he's afraid it would be used against him at a parole hearing. >> i am resistance to the idea of professional therapy because i feel like i didn't really benefit. >> paris did receive some counseling in the juvenile system when he was still in his teens. >> i was not ready to confront it with the darkness of myself. >> but now you are ready to confront it? >> i stare it down and i wake up to it and fal...