Dont facebook. Egypt a country where worlds collide modern life merges with traditions that date back to the days of the pharaohs egypt is steeped in history and has more ancient monuments than any other modern country my family and i visited egypt throughout my childhood and i grew up immersed in its history and culture. The last few years have seen major upheaval. The presence of women during these events was unprecedented in what is traditionally a gender segregated society and it seems to indicate that major changes are taking place. Im in egypt on an undercover journey that will take me to cairo luxor. And london. Its been more than a decade since my last visit and much has happened since then. Egypts revolution is a demand for change that cuts across class religion and gender millions of people poured onto the streets to topple the old regime and later the first democratically elected president the journey was both political and personal for many. People demanded freedom dignity social justice bread and more gender equality. Ive come to london to talk to share reno fekete a sexual rights advocate and author of the Controversial Book sex and the citadel does she believe that egypt is ready for what many are calling a sexual revolution. In egypt and across the arab region we have what are called the three red lines these are subjects that youre not supposed to tackle in word or deed so the first of these red lines is politics and of course that line has been well and truly crossed since two thousand and eleven the second red line is religion one is seeing people ask questions of religion who speaks for islam for example what should be the role of islam in public life and that third red line dr deadline is sex and now the change that millions of us as a as liberal a gypsy has had hoped for hasnt quite come to pass so for not seeing a revolution in political life were silly not going to see it in personal life and were definitely not going to see it in sexual life because sexuality at the end of the day is so much more complex than politics it brings in religion it brings in economics it brings in tradition its like a very complex tapestry and if you want to leave a new pattern that is going to take time so were not talking about a revolution here were talking about evolution. The years following the two hundred eleven uprising have been difficult for the city of cairo. The journalist im about to meet is just one of millions of women who broke with tradition to take part in the revolution. It from him covered those events for a major newspaper but as the protests escalated she found herself in ever more dangerous situations. Covering the revolution was challenging in many ways not only because im a woman but because it was dangerous sometimes i remember one night it was november two thousand and eleven and i was out with a female photographer from the newspaper we first we were running like were running running like many people like hundreds of people in this. Even the who swear running and you have the police running after us with guns and you just hear the sound you just have to run for your life and i remember at that time my friend told me that she has seen the red laser just above my head i know it was dangerous but i think i dont know what we were fighting for it was for this. Woman have been really really a very big part of the egyptian revolution here on the street you see many women taking part and thats very new to the egyptian culture like the two women are on the street fighting protesting and saying hey stop this we dont and the corruption and mubaraks rule whatever this was awkward just its not culturally acceptable women were on the street from the first day and i have like met several friends who used to say i started going to the revolution taking part because my wife started first because my wife pushed me because my wife was in the rear square and i couldnt sit here and home watching television on the sofa and my wife is there and im up there so her being there pushed some as well to be part because they felt oh if were going to do this why cant i. Have. More than forty percent of the protesters were women but the fall of the regime was followed by a series of sexual attacks many women feared for their safety as the political protest intensified so too did the attacks with as many as one hundred sexual assaults in a single evening. During the first eighteen days of the revolution there was really no Sexual Harassment happening it was very very clean safe zone where the energy was all targeted towards the end goal that everyone was looking for when when you have this energy and this cause its not about sexual house its about helping the mob attack so the sexual mob x. Amount regarding bad this is not the same mentality of a guy who is going on the street because hes fighting for a cause thats a different kind of mentality which joined the street. Thats from the way. By nature i believe im a very courageous person but when the mob attacks the sex sexual love attack started and the heres where i felt we are safe and i think starting that i decided not to go and cover in Tahrir Square anymore. Harris map is a volunteer organization thats trying to change the way Sexual Harassment is perceived across egypt the Group Supports women who were attacked during the uprising nora and ahmed joined harass map after they witnessed sexual assaults on the streets of downtown cairo. I start focusing on working with second on Sexual Harassment professionally when i saw a muscle them from like in front of the prison in my view a group of subs like they are saying it in years old girth because she was protesting going to the government. And there was like a policeman in front of them i didnt do anything i remember i called my friends my my female friends and i was like checking on them like even if they are not around but like i feel like insecurity about my friends and my sisters and my family from here you know i mean i couldnt hundred anymore but what motivates men to take part in such attacks. So there are a couple of things that kind of influence the psych mob creation and so one is just the idea that you can. Comment on or touch a woman in the streets with impunity so you can do it when you go to work. Unlike a sunday morning. And you can do it in the square during a celebration or a protest and nothing would happen its just kind of like its allowed its normal its its what guys do and this is of course again like an extreme form of what we see on the streets like every day situations so i might get harassed by a guy very badly and some other guys might see it happening and they think like oh yeah ill do it too and then they also do it and other people are around the know will stop them like no one will interfere so the same thing in the how do you square for example people see this happening and they choose to join in rather than seeing you know this is not ok and we try to stop it because here like horrible stories of the mob assaults we are talking about sometimes its the muscles between two hundred persons like sometimes its like one thousand person around one or one levy like you can you can see if they are. Like trying to help pair or trying to harassing her and so its a i mean its its a mess and they were very violent. People were using back sticks and sharp objects a u. N. Report estimates that ninety nine percent of women in egypt are harassed daily the vast majority of sexual assaults are not reported including my own experience in the one nine hundred ninety s. I was attacked by a group of teenagers in a local market my father intervened but the locals persuaded us not to report it the boys they said were just being boys. House map wants to change this their online reporting system allows people who witness or experience Sexual Harassment to record it on their website they conduct street campaigns to encourage people to intervene or speak out when they see or experience Sexual Harassment. I have harassed every day. Every time i go outside the door i know that this is a possibility that i will experience some kind of Sexual Harassment if it happens everywhere all kinds of areas and neighborhoods it happens all the time morning and they evening night and most of the time its verbal harassment or even just like the language of looking up and down. But also touching when youre put in public transport or anywhere where theres a big crowd that it happens very easy. Even when im on my bike it happens like people try to touch me while theyre driving by you have to prepare yourself mentally its an everyday thing that happens you eat food every day and you get hit with every day in. The city of giza is located just southwest of cairo. Its on to the pyramids the population is over three million im here to learn more about the everyday lives of people their culture and the dynamics of traditional egyptian extended families. But. There are many expectations on what a woman should be and what the good woman should do and there are many rules put upon you and women are expected to take of the house and in many times work as well if youre talking about. More of the class and they get educated but still the way they get married. Its between her and her husband its more of him superior to her you know was. Like fixated the family is absolutely key it is the bedrock of ones personal life and that rock of society because at the end of the day marriage is about families coming together which is important for the state because of. The role of the father and the family you actually in reflection cement the role of the head of state of the head of the state or the authoritarian figure. You know is the head of his family and has lived for more than twenty years in a home he built himself. Out of the ghetto knew one floor and adored the hard. Floor eighteen people in my family and living in my home here. Living either all my life when i went in there but who cant ever buy the next room i think when i put a male with a cup of tea or something but i have been living in this blazing almost twenty years this is. Her job is to feed the family. And then end. This. Thing and end and yet at the end the woman. I dont ship all war together to have the meal or to give up everything and. Everything whats happening must you know what every every small piece at my home i must know what you might always have the k. Mornings done yes i am twenty one years old i have martin from. Home though if i did my mother in law is. My own. We are. One family. The first to get married but. After the. She got a choice her boyfriend would like before. I did have to cut Something Like this. Or that my mother to detroit this for me she was fourteen years and i would be sixteen. I dont wish to know what i thirty five years of. Being married. I know well you know beginning and it was not a choice. The families agreed afterwards. We were engaged for about three years before we married. After the engagement families grew closer together. After then i have to take care of my husband again and the family that i now belong to does the most important thing and my husband will do the same for me. Tell him mohammeds wedding ceremony lasted for three days there were fifteen hundred guests from across the region. Well they tell your sister in law i want that i married for almost six years. I got smart in ten years old its a very normal very very very normal like every woman. In my area here at home. Works house here with my auntie. Arranged my deportment. Return to my home to. Prepare our food. Everything from want to thank your security everything is. There when you had a choice and given that freedom you can do what they maybe you want to do any better or something maybe in return i think a little maybe and then alex you could do what. Everything is everything here not like before but. I dont seem to have benefited from these modern trends before my my. My big dream and my important a dream had to go on in my education and. Ended to work in india and being a journalist. Wasnt and those are thousands. And my family and my vinci. Actually my husband know never approved or live to live and those are still when i love my father my father and my husband dont want me to work my dream was to study young henry for that also lets be my only dream and i wish it would have come true. And if the best sort of after i finished high school my father wouldnt let me go to college and right now i dont think i ever will. But maybe later that are the if my debts are all. Going to grow all wanted to go and those are down the study i made the order or in a single and those are. A lot helping her. To make her her dream too. In this case i feel love my dream. Come true my. Parents were also concerned about value and while they safety. Everybody. Very afraid a fraud to walk alone in the street. Whether we should i mean its because of the sexual attacks of. The guys heris all the women no matter how theyre dressed. The men justify this by saying that the women provoked them because of that clothes or the way they walk but thats not true and they also harris women who are dressed conservatively you know and then there are women who dress provocatively and the men dont haris them at all. In the least as well how did we are. Now im on my way to meet a woman ill call him all her life is very different from that of the family weve just met weve agreed to conceal her identity. I was always rebellious. You know things like you can do this you can do that but i think my parents have a hard time with really hard time because. I was just not conforming with whatever. Rules they were putting for me i was actually born in my grandmothers placing visa my dad was it came from so you upper egypt started from from nothing you had actually absolutely nothing my mom would live things or she was one of ten i never really knew the difference between a born a girl but when my brother was born i ben i actually saw the difference he is the war you are the girl youre supposed to be doing certain things and he was supposed to be. The powerful things as far as i saw it i was in allowed to to be back home after eight oclock and this is something that i really hated right from the start. Almost father worked in britain and decided to move the entire family to london. Hated it because i was taken from my friends people that i loved but as time went on you know i started to see the good side of it and that was like god company would couldnt believe how free they were at seeing a man and a woman kissing the street you know to me was you know how could you do that and this is where most of. My. How can i say with all my rebellion years and finding myself and knowing what i want. I remember having a conversation with my dad where i was saying what if i dont want to get married what would happen and. He said what do you mean you dont want to get married you know you have to get married you know women who dont get married are looked upon very badly in society and cannot be not married i said but what if i dont care you have to know this that you are on the my dominance and you will be under it no matter what you cannot get out of that until you get marriage and if i die it would be your brothers who would be taking care of you and when i heard this i was at the age of twenty three and it was then that i decided im going to leave home no matter what happens i would actually leave his daughter being going away from his house without getting marriage it is breaking news on a my if it takes my dad killing me because that was the option if you need her will you die but i felt i would die anyway. Egypt is home to ninety five Million People and the population is expected to increase substantially over the next decade every six months one million new egyptians are born and every year more than a million of them get married. I think if a woman just that they get married might be each of like starting twenty five thirty. You so the question mark start raising up like so why arent you married arent to arent interested in marriage so whats wrong with you great fear here is that she will go off the rails that she will want to have sex before marriage she might be tempted to do that or she might make excessive sexual demands of her husband during marriage both of which are marriage killers and so in order to preserve this this this rigidity families will go to all sorts of lengths to preserve virginity for example female genital mutilation in order to keep girls on the straight and narrow so theyre not tempted to have sex before marriage is the belief that underpins the practice in many cases this is about the familys honor this is not about individual honor this is the families on the family has succeeded in bringing up their girl that she is a virgin and they have managed to deliver the Genuine Article to the groom on the wedding night. Im all knew what would happen if she left her family but she did it anyway. I made a decision to leave home my dad didnt kill me right so i survived that but i worked in england for sometime and that was my way to be independent because i worked really hard so i had the money i had the financial backing of me i started to live my life and pursuing my my dream. Ive always loved my country you know and. You know its always a treasure to me i love being here i love the people i love everything about i love the warmth i love the sun and england was thinking of me that so i had decided that i was going to go back to egypt and live my life in egypt with all the restrictions but im going to manage it one way or another and that. Actually the for the beginning of the story of how i got married. I met an unconventional man open minded just it was all coincidence you know like one night we were having fun and partying and talking as usual and then it was brought up life i was saying i want to i want to have kids. But i dont want to get married but i why i really want to have kids i want to feel i want to be a mother and he said me too you know i want to have kids but id the one the commitment of a family and the women being financially dependent and i dont want the conventional life in any ways i thought wow this is this is just the right guy for me and that way was the way for me to be accepted again by my parents and thats how my father accepted me back because of that look im going to get married im going to do what you like and then i went to egypt and he came to egypt as well but weve never lived like a married couple i actually have two boys we agreed think in ninety six that lets lets start working on having a baby and this is when my first son came. But thats not where this story ends a most unconventional marriage allowed her to explore an alternative lifestyle. I always felt that there was something. Not right about dating men. I didnt want to be the other one so thats why i did it. But i started feeling different feelings at the age of i think thirteen fourteen you know feeling the feelings towards certain. Women friends that i had and thats when i started thinking oh im weird overseas homosexuality is. Regarded as a taboo religiously and culturally. Assuming that theres no abundance of lesbian is a is a wrong assumption because there are plenty of lesbians and i know plenty. You do not admit and some of them do not admit to themselves what they are it is regarded worse for men than it is for women finding it. For a man to be gay thats really bad seed being gay takes the manhood from them so if you if you are gay then youre not a man how can you be accepted. Right after being away from each other. I was at this time a very different person than i was ten years before i was capable of making my own decisions and capable of making things happen i was still in love with the woman i was. At at the age of sixteen we started a relationship straightaway you know as soon as i came five days afterwards we managed it in a way that she was able to live with me but that had to be applied and that we dont live together in front of people i managed to get. Like one flaw in a building where it has two flats opposite each other that was the the cover up and thats how we did it and we were together until. Two thousand and ten things have changed back in the nineteen seventies egypt was much open. I think there was a way that came in and i think it was in the early one nine hundred eighty s. Where. A lot of. Men were having jobs in saudi ok and when they go to saudi they get to learn its flat as it should be come back to egypt and. Obviously they they they do with the right way. And that was the start of. When i saw all my aunts getting availed in no time my family is very religious and most of my aunts were and when a cop the only person with no way to get in my family mother and father aside its me. At least ten percent of egypts population is christian and while christianity and islam have major theological differences both religions share similarities when it comes to taboo subjects and the importance of marriage. Today my boys has always made me feel like this is a subject i dont want to get into maybe when they get older i kept saying maybe when they get older oh no and now my son is much older so. It is not an easy feeling because when you feel that you can be rejected by your own son that there is a there is a possibility that you are rejected by your own son or that your son could be ashamed of you its going to be tough so the the decision is very hard. The ancient city of luxor is located about five hundred kilometers south of cairo its sometimes called the worlds greatest open air museum because of the numerous monuments temples and tombs that are located there. The rhythm of daily life in luxor seems to have stayed the same for centuries. Tourism is the regions main source of income but the number of tourists has fallen sharply since the revolution ive known mohammed since he was a young boy working on boats with his father tons of change here. Says the city it is now its not many theories because about the problems in cairo and like these and tourist its our life you know. All in my village all people whom we believe they work for towards. Men like mohammad who dont earn much money cant afford to get married. Everyone need money but because too much at least ten minutes i was in egypt at least and if you want to be medium sometime families they are you choose to depend so and that your family. They ask about head about head and body that who dont walk because they must be good family. After the end you will have engaged if thats ok you will fight. All the people they you know in the village because they you go to get life with and then. Enjoy it. You can see here is good or not because you dont know anything about what you know or what is she is ok or are thought like this and we say give like what im after youre open to what a muslim you will see if its good because times like these you will keep it and if not after to city if im upset and it is not good. But it is for the people they have money. Where i live its no win then what are they saying if the women work you will not be the boss she would be the boss you know its getting about all they are relies on and really saying they family spend mind they have to pay for everything and the women always she spend your money. Women here its in college you. Know. Carol people. Love it is a very important part of that they was have a god for love and then love it is a from soul to soul or from heart of the heart of. When i have a children i want to give good life to them i want to look after then that it will have a School Everything but i want to have a relationship because time is around. When it comes to discussing sex and sexuality sometimes it takes an outsider to break down the barriers. My name sundra i live in scotland i first came to egypt and two thousand and eight since then i have been fifty eight times i dont know if its the people the sunshine of the view i just love old. To begin with i just knew the man once they got to know me. I was invited more to their homes i have met wife i have met children i have met the mother ive met the south i think because ive bella put a leash and ship with many of their egyptian men here a lot of them see me as like a motherly figure but foreign they ask many things and theyre very very shy about asking not so much and i because they know that they can ask me and but some of the things they tell me a few saw. Frustrated for them i find that they are locking ojukwu. Like fakes education that even by old year that your body they dont know about their own bodies never mind ive been his body. So yeah it is a local businessman hes agreed to discuss some of the more complex aspects of sexuality in egypt. My name say it on a form like sort. Of former work of the nile and my mic member lover of the fish i mean when i ask the question of why you love the boy more than the get not really boasts of him garrett meek family where the heart very a bit out of all the world dont care. Even to be no good man him can be you know thats a for get to know so difficult to get must be got. Must be got again not allowed even to go. To have some boy to walk on with what maybe she do mystic a little ship was someone in the family do annoy in or maybe some boy or man get her stalk and she relaxed so much. And have a go like thats. Easy no one can touch. Excellence and clearly. On the other set but why ive been told when he. Was a Family Doctor had. Big trouble with killing her. You know about me bad with all the family. As for six egyptian men dont know what to do many of the european women are actually teaching the young men some of them speak about the experience of the reaganite they didnt have a clue they sat with their right for an hour and a half after everyone had finished the party and they were so shy and they physically did not know what to do they just seem a man may have told me its their duty at their husband wants thinks its their duty to be in merits of him as my wife she may experience she dont understand. Really im not saying she no good jim of understanding no no i give her the arms and future im the son bulldog so to gods experience through. That that wasnt. Im a bear so ok. I believe from what i hear as the woman has been and the home to make the babies to cook the dinner im the man whos been there not like it was in britain many years ago people that i know here from the likes of fifty year old right down to the twenty one year olds. They know. Its no good to have it this way but it will have its going to change because its that of people to the judicial tradition a day later looking for love and i believe that the rights of looking for love israel but they dont know how to give each other love the only nor the position shes in the home having the children and hes out and on the money. So on the one hand they want to have these dynamic and exciting sexualized put on the other hand the expectations are pumped up by the huge volumes of porn that is going down across the arab world the video clips and all this culture has intensified like the sexual. Energy or the sexual desire in egyptian men yet you watched you open on the t. V. And you watch with your family a woman who was dancing wearing performed at the close that you will accept a daughter to wear neither your wife to wear and you really liking it most young people in egypt find it very difficult to get a job so men are having to wait to get married until their late twentys the question is what are you going to do in all that time because again if you dont get married its hard to move out of your familys place youre not supposed to be having sex and youre not supposed to be having children now the Prophet Muhammad has suggested that we as muslims if we if we have to wait to get married we dont we should fast but the prophet mohammed did not mean that we were supposed to fast until our thirtys ridges conservatives no matter what the faith use. Yes as a tool to control people because its very powerful if you control someones sexual life you control them at the heart of their lives. The important thing to keep in mind is that women in the arab region women in egypt are not helpless and they are not hopeless they are getting on with life says very often they do it in a different way that women are empowered that women have more control over their lives does not mean that men list of this but it is no easy task in egypt or anywhere in the world. With courage and determination amol has managed to create a life for herself in the country that she loves. Telling my son its like a journey specifically in the past two years ive been preparing him for this because i know eventually ill be able to to say it. And thats what happened you know when they were just chatting and it was very surprising to me because. He was asking questions not about why or who i was with he was just asking generally a question around the subject it was very nice it was they were it was. Actually much better than i expected i expected him to be maybe a bit of anger a bit of you know this belief nothing of the household it was like i was telling him a better story. Stepping outside. The boundaries of society than the rules in the cultures and the religion is very difficult its not easy at all we need to learn to accept our differences we need to listen. To each other which we did in the last two years in egypt have been really difficult i wanted to see a better egypt i wanted to see egypt that is accepting differences in every way and i thought the revolution would shuffle. It did in a way shuffle some things but where its ending now. People cant stand each other for political differences the little one other differences about teaching our children dont stop you know keep going keep finding ways for yourself. Keep fighting for who was dont give up. This is been a remarkable journey for me and ive been amazed that people have been so willing to share their stories. Egypt is an extraordinarily diverse and complex country and it will remain a part of me forever. Take off like we take football personally. Your wedding. Three women really just want to put the board back of the man theyve come all the way to the indian state goal because football is a team sport. Yeah. And i think one day this war will be considered a cruel and unjust war but you know certainly all citizens are a grain every man woman and child is she not the only friend their homeland is the enemy invades. No one wants russia here dont need to nuke which is going to. Rebel against a mighty global news that matters. D. W. Made for mines. Its all about the moments that night before. Its all about the stories inside. Its all about George Chance to discover the world from different perspectives. Join us and be inspired by distinctive instagram or others at g. W. Stories new topics each week on instagram. This is day w news live from berlin showdown in spain of a catalonia is plans for a separatist referendum spains government says the vote is illegal and does not go ahead because i leaders insist everything is in place and that it will also all