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Channing no, dancing is your thing and im not going to do it. Yes, i did invent dance. But tonight i give you the gift of dance. Everybody dance now channing ellen, im not doing that. We havent prepared anything. Its not going to happen. Channing, dance everybody dance now channing oh oh oh everybody dance now yeah yeah everybody dance now yeah yeah everybody [ cheers and applause ] everybody dance now everybody dance now everybody dance now [ cheers and applause ] everybody dance now [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] channing whoo, lets go, baby whoo whoo lets go whoo thank you whoa, thank you oh, thats thats my time, good night, guys, byebye guillermo no, no, youre not done yet, youve still got to do the show. Good luck. Channing what . Are you guys serious . [ cheers and applause ] hold on. After all that, after all that . And this . And that . Are you serious . Okay. [ cheers and applause ] okay, all right, lets just wing it. Whats up, yall, whats going on . [ cheers and applause ] im your guest host for the night Channing Tatum you may know me from movies or tv or this popular meme right here. [ laughter ] look at that. That is look, whoever photoshopped that right there . It is deeply meaningful to me. [ laughter ] thank you. Look, when jimmy texted med to see if i could step in for him tonight my First Response was new phone, who dis . [ laughter ] no, look, im so im so happy to be here. Because honestly, ive always wanted an adorable sidekick that wasnt jonah hill. [ laughter ] and now ive got one. Hola, guillermo hola, welcome to the show channing yall see that . I spoke spanish. Whats going on, man . G. , you got to be honest with me, are you more excited that im hosting tonight or Jennifer Lawrence is hosting tomorrow . You, of course. [ cheers and applause ] channing really, are you serious . If she asks you that tomorrow, are you going to say me . Jimmy no. I promise. Channing i get it. I just want to say thank you, g. , for being my sidekick tonight, it does mean a lot to me. I got you a gift. I think about it and youre out here supporting jimmy and youre there for him every single night. Then i thought, whos there for guillermo . [ audience awww ] channing i got you your very own guillermo. [ cheers and applause ] guillermo thank you, i like it thank you a lot, mr. Tatum channing yep, i got him from amazon prime fresh. They really do have everything. [ laughter ] look yep. You guys have a great halloween . [ cheers and applause ] yeah, we did, we had lots of trickortreaters at my house last night. I had no idea how many moms in their 40s love trickortreaters. Most of them didnt even have kids, like they were just there. It was weird. [ laughter ] so weird. Look oh, man. This is fun. Even though jimmy isnt here with us tonight, he recorded a Little Something this morning with his daughter baby jane. And he wanted us to share it. Jimmy jane, i have to tell you something. What . Jimmy last night while you were sleeping, mommy and i ate all your halloween candy. What . Ohoh. But i still have one, dont worry. Jimmy we left you smarties. Thats it. But we ate all the rest. Look. We ate it all. What do you think . Huh . Its ready jimmy the waffles . Yeah. Jimmy oh. Are you mad about the halloween candy . No. Jimmy youre not . No. Jimmy are you happy we ate all your halloween candy . No. Jimmy no. Are you how are you feeling right now . Mad. Jimmy mad . Yeah. Jimmy what do you want to say . I mean sad. Jimmy you mean sad . But its okay . Yeah. Jimmy jimmy kimmel told me to do it. Oh. Wheres the sweeties . Jimmy mommy ate those. Oh jimmy daddy only ate skittles and m ms and kitkata and reeses Peanut Butter cups, and gum, and the eyeballs, and the twizzlers, and the lollipops. Thats all i ate. The eyeball is bubbles. Jimmy i ate the bubbles, yeah. Those are bubbles and for blowing. Jimmy i know, i know, every time i hiccup a bubble comes out. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] channing oh, man. Look, lets just hope your kids arent as well adjusted as she is. Look, if you want to do that to your children, just upload your videos to youtube with the title hey jimmy kimmel i told my kids i ate all their halloween candy. Then look for a message from the show and tomorrow Jennifer Lawrence might put your kid on tv. [ cheers and applause ] so speaking of kids. Look, i think we can all agree theyre probably the most honest people on the planet. So to get ready for tonight i sat down with a couple of kids to get their advice on how to be a good latenight host. So take it away, channing. Thanks, c. T. I got some of my homies here with me. Bob, whats going on . Gilbert . Whats going on . My names not gilbert. Channing so i have to host a latenight talk show for this guy. Do you know who this is . Thats the jimmy kimmel. Jimmy kimmel. Channing kimmie jimmel . No kimmie channing kimmie jimmel . No channing kimmie jimmel bimmel . Jimmy kimmel. Channing jimmy kimmel and bits . Just say it without the bits. Channing bits. No channing do you think that hes funny or do you think hes past his prime . Funny funny channing i need to make people laugh on this show. Thats kind of one of the requirements to be a host. And i dont really feel like im all that funny. Do you guys know any good jokes . Oh, i know a good joke. What goes oom, oom . Channing i dont know. A cow walking backwards. Channing so ill open with that. How does lady gaga like her steak . Channing how . Rah rah rah rah rah channing you wrote my monologue, i appreciate you for that. Thats who im subbing in for. Im a host of the show for him, its his show. And this is who im interviewing. [ cheers and applause ] do you know who this is . She works on a show thats called ellen. Channing yep, 10 points. Oh, yes. Double time. You guys ow, ow. Channing has anyone told you a really long story and theyre not being all that interesting . Yes, yes channing maybe theyre being boring and you dont want to be rude, how do you make them not boring . Sorry to interrupt but can you make this more like entertaining . Channing i like that. So lets role play here. Maybe both you guys at the same time tell me a story thats really boring. And i will be channing playing jimmy. Okay. At the same time, right . Channing yes, go. Okay. [ together ] one time i was walking on the street and then i saw something and i didnt really like it but then i kept walking and walking and walking and then i saw Something Else and then i channing excuse me, im so sorry to interrupt you guys. Could you maybe just tell me something a little bit more exciting . Sure sure [ together ] i went to the water park with my sister and we went on the big water slide and then we had a boy and when we slipped down i slipped off of it and there was a poopy in the pool and then we went back to the hotel. Channing you should go on the road with that. Do you guys always talk in unison together . What . What . Channing what . Ha ha you got a poopy. You got. I dont know what youre saying. I dont know what youre saying. Channing i dont know what youre saying. You stop talking. You stop talking. You stop talking. [ applause ] channing back to you, channing. [ cheers and applause ] channing thanks, kids. Thanks, channing. Look, weve got a great show for you tonight. Pink is here. Well be right back with Ellen Degeneres [ cheers and applause ] dicky portions of Jimmy Kimmel Live are brought to you by crown royale. Watch monday night to see a concert from brad paisley and john fogerty in front of the battleship. Crown royal, live generously. 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[ cheers and applause ] and look, its a real privilege, its a real privilege to sit behind your desk, even if its just for one night. I got to say theres an alarming amount of dried gum under here. [ laughter ] you should really think about cleaning that out or something. Its weird and its grossing me out. [ laughter ] anyways. Tonight on the show, her new album is called beautiful trauma. [ cheers and applause ] shell sing for us, pink from the mercedesbenz stage. Tomorrow night Jennifer Lawrence will assume the host duties and her guest will be Kim Kardashian west. Shes a total kardashian superfan so shes going to freak out. [ laughter ] shes also going to run the results of the halloween candy youtube challenge. By the way, look, i figured if im asking you to do this to your kids i should probably do it to mine too. [ audience aww ] channing wait till you see it. Heres how my daughter took the news. M sorry but i ate alyour candy. Oh. [ crying ] channing im sorry, i just got so hungry. Do you have anything to say to daddy . Channing im kidding, i didnt eat your candy. Didnt . Channing didnt. Oh. Channing i was pulling a joke. Thats not funny. Channing youre right, it wasnt funny. [ cheers and applause ] channing youre right, that really was not funny. Im so sorry, baby. I hope you forgive me someday for that. My first guest tonight is one of the nicest people in the entire world. She is the host of ellen. And weirdly that also happens to be her name. So please say hello to Ellen Degeneres [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] channing hi. [ cheers and applause ] channing thats right this is so weird. [ cheers and applause ] this is so exciting. Channing what do i do . Well, you talk to me, ask me questions, and we turn it around. Channing man, this is so weird. Are you having fun . Channing i am having fun so far. I told you if you danced it would be the right thing, im glad you took my advice. Channing youre right. It really took you over, i had no idea that you were so ready for it. Channing i love me some 90s, it just possesses me. Yeah. I love it. They had like two songs. Channing they, do actually. They only have two. It was that and what was the other song . Channing im you knew the second one. Well find out. Everybody dance. Was it sweat . What was it . I got the power. Yes, good one. Channing nice pull, nice pull. Good one, thanks. Channing how are we doing, how am i doing . You should ask me some questions, you know. Like what i have planned for thanksgiving, stuff like that. Channing what do you have planned for thanksgiving . Nothing. [ laughter ] channing this is going well, all right. You should think of things on your own. Channing dont they prepare this stuff or something . Dont they prepare you . Usually, yeah. You didnt repair prepare [ laughter ] channing i did the repairing, i didnt do the preparing. We could talk about what do you want to talk about . Channing i dont know, how about lets see, this is really hard. This stuff is really, really hard. Its like having a conversation and everything. [ laughter ] channing i know. Did you have this much of a hard time like your first season . Early on . Channing yeah. No, but you know, before i started my show, they asked me no, i didnt. [ laughter ] channing what are you saying . They asked me to interview people to show that i could talk to people, which i thought was the weirdest thing. At my house, Alanis Morissette and tom hanks and helen hunt and somebody else came over and they recorded me having a conversation with them so that they could approve that i could talk to people. I had to like audition. Channing were you not talking to the people trying to give you the job . Yes, yes, obviously not well enough, i didnt ask enough questions. People like to talk about themselves. So thats why its usually like, how are you . Tell me about you. How are the kids . Stuff like that. Channing thats why im being quiet right now. Right, because you dont want to know anything about me . I see. [ laughter ] you should come over for thanksgiving. In case, now that people are interested, you should be there. Channing yeah, this is going to be really weird if im not there now. It will be you and your family, your daughter, who is going to go to therapy now. [ laughter ] channing i have no spine. Yeah. Channing zero spine. Yeah. Channing i go ahead and ruin my daughter. You have a good spine. A nice, sexy spine. [ cheers and applause ] channing thank you. Thank you. I learned about your spine i think your first time you were on the show. You showed me the possibility of your spine. Worked my spine. Yes, i did. I think somebody sent it really hope that there is somebody sent it. Do men give lap dances . Or is that not on i dont know what men strippers do. Yeah, you basically put on little shows. I dont know, its not as what kind of show . Show us. [ cheers and applause ] channing so that was my very first time on your show. I got to let you know that was the very first time that my dad actually found out that i was a stripper for a short time. Wait your dad didnt know that you had been a stripper . Channing nope. He learned it that day . Channing giving you a dance, yes. Wow. How did he take it . Channing not well. [ laughter ] no . Channing really, really not well. Look whats happened with you. I mean, your career is so its great. I mean, youre a dancer, youre doing movies where youre acting and doing really serious heavy roles and youre an amazing actor. Isnt he an amazing actor . [ cheers and applause ] channing thank you, that means the world to me. I just got to say. Thank you so much for doing this. Youre actually interviewing me, somehow she turned this around. Come on, guys. Ellen, everybody. Well be right back [ cheers and applause ] ] vw drivers have always put others first. 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Channing can you explain this to me . Can you explain this to me . Channing i feel like im getting mugged by you. Yeah, no channing are you stealing my wallet . Whats happening here . You started it. You were leaning over that balcony and i decided to join you in the dance. I went to go see magic mike and you may wonder why [ cheers and applause ] why me . Channing why . Because it was fantastic. It was so good. Channing thank you. It was fantastic, but there were some people there that we looked around, it looked like there were some women who brought their husbands. Channing yeah. That thought magic mike was some kind of magician or something. [ laughter ] they were so confused of what was going on. Channing thankfully, i think they ended up like actually having a great time. You cant not have a good time, if youre in vegas, go see magic mike live, it was so good, it was so much fun. We did a taped piece we put on my show and we hung out and danced, i danced on you channing a little gambling afterwards. We did, poker afterwards, blackjack for a few minutes. Channing is that your game . I like poker better than blackjack, but i do like blackjack. Channing i think you read in your book you have a crazy story about a blackjack table. Thats funny you should bring that up. [ laughter ] channing its in stores. Its funny that it leads into a bit that i have. [ laughter ] channing do we have a clip . Oh, i do have a clip, yes, i brought a clip. [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] channing shes the full package. I am the full package. [ laughter ] channing true. Youre the full package. [ cheers and applause ] [ rim shot ] channing like one of my favorite things about your show is you give away so much stuff. I actually wanted to do something on this show they dont do it here. Channing they do not. Jimmy so is cheap. [ laughter ] jimmy, he never i watch the show every night. I love him. But he never gives anything away. We give away stuff all the time. And people, the one thing we do, you know this because youre a guest on the show a lot, we give our guests ellen underwear because its the best underwear youll ever wear. Channing its true, i actually have some on. [ cheers and applause ] channing its so soft. Yes, it is the softest underwear. And i thought, what can i do to make up for jimmys thriftiness . Channing thriftiness. Taylor, come out, i want everybody to have ellen underwear. [ cheers and applause ] channing lets go back here. Whoo hey, hey, hey [ cheers and applause ] channing ellen weekdays in syndication, well be right back with pink eve i drop what i do me you are my best friend and weve got some thingto do do you wanna, do you wanna, do you wanna do you wanna, do you wanna, do you wanna yeaheaeaeah it all started when sophia stopped into marshalls and founa mug for surprisingly little green. She paired tha with somsucculents. 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Inside the rack houses every barrel is aged four long years, for a fuller, smoother flavor. Our history is made from the inside. How will you make yours . I got it from the same place i bought your present from last year. Its the thing from the link you sent us. And the year before. I found the perfect gift for you. But it wouldnt ship in time. So i just. Texted you a photo. I bought it with one click. I included a gift receipt. Its the thought that counts . Dont shop like everybody else. This year shop ebay for brand new, nearly new, and totally you gifts. Channing welcome back, im Channing Tatum and i am your jimmy kimmel tonight. My next guest is an amazingly talented and inspiring artist. Her new album is called beautiful trauma and you can see her perform on the cmas november 8th. Please say hello to pink [ cheers and applause ] youre doing great channing thank you. Literally im not going to remember any of it tomorrow. Its fun, right . [ cheers and applause ] channing how are you . Good. Im great. Channing how was halloween . I have a halloween hangover. Channing yeah, i can actually if i can show this. Sure. Channing i saw that. You guys went really hard this year. Look at my little pirate and my little baby girl [ applause ] look how serious she is. Channing oh, she is thats actually the issue. So my daughter, we watched descendents one time. One time. She got so sassy, we never watched it again. It went off of the tv. Oh, i can blame willows sassiness on descendents . Its their fault. Channing bring back elsa or tinkerbell or whatever it is. So much so, we went as two fairies and i was a unicorn. Aww channing were trying to yep. [ applause ] you are stoked. You look super happy. Channing my horn is not terry was a pirate and he was about that happy. Channing wait, did you guys did you guys do the video d traumatize your little one, willow . We did. But hold on. She knows whats going on. You dont have to feel bad. Channing can we see that . Hey, willow. I got some bad news. What . After you went to bed last night i had a couple of beers and ate all your candy. Give me my candy. I ate it. But there is one piece in there i saved you. You ate all of it. I did on accident. I got back, had a couple of beers you promise . You dont, do you . So i dont believe you. Channing oh, man [ cheers and applause ] she is so sass. Shes so smart. Shes like that because of the descendents. [ laughter ] channing look, and she has careys number. Oh, he messes with her every single day. Every single day. Tells her at thanksgiving, its big bird. Hes awful. Its awful. Awful. [ audience moaning ] channing im going to give you its not the descendents and its you and how you raise her, how you and carey raise her. I saw your i know this is supposed to be a comedy show but i saw your speech at the vmas. [ cheers and applause ] channing having a daughter, i just really, really, really appreciate it. If you could just for the people that didnt see it, just maybe give us a little piece. Well, i mean, it was so many things come out of that girls mouth. But at this particular day i was taking her to school and she said, out of the blue, that she felt like she was the ugliest girl she knew. And i try not to preach. And freak out. Constantly. I try to walk that line constantly of, what am i supposed to do . And selfesteems a big one for me. So i made a it wasnt a power point presentation, although i said it was. It was a word document. [ laughter ] whatever. Channing big clarification. Yeah i just i showed her a bunch of androgynous rock stars like david bowie and all kinds of people. And she loves david bowie. So that kind of hit home with her. And then i told her that people make fun of me too. That kind of floored her because she still likes me. [ cheers and applause ] channing yeah. Anyway, i told her theres lots of different kinds of beautiful. And its our job to help people see that. Channing i agree with that. [ cheers and applause ] i really, really applaud you and thank you for that. Its helping build a lot of badass women. Raising girls is really hard. Channing you aint lying, especially today. Speaking of badass women, you worked with my wife jenna 15 years ago. I know i did. Channing you probably dont remember it i remember it. Channing did you . See if you remember this. Oh, god. Channing did you see her . Yes, i saw her. Channing she was there on the right. She was there so no one looked at me. I had not yet learned how to sing live yet well. Thats painful. Jenna still has that outfit. Do you still have heck no. Channing oh, man. Terrible. Channing congratulations on beautiful trauma debuting at number one. Thank you. [ cheers and applause ] channing i do have one question, though. Okay. Channing why so much swearing . Theres so much swearing. I know. No, i think what happened is because im home with my kids all the time then i go to the studio and im just like, [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. I know i cant say that. Channing no but i went nuts. Channing say it. I didnt realize it until i played it. And she was there. And i was like oh my god, what just happened . Its like tourettes for the [ bleep ] word, its awful. [ cheers and applause ] awful. Channing that is your favorite one . That is my favorite swear word, its an adjective, its a noun, its a verb. [ bleep ]. You can channing say it. [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. Channing you can do a question. [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] channing yes, yes. Felt good. It was my moms favorite too. Willow told me i should call it the fmom. Channing is willow cussing now . No. Well, she has. But its really good because carey and i curse so differently, we can always tell whose fault it was. Its usually his fault. Channing wait, how does he cuss . I dont say things like this [ bleep ]ing door. [ bleep ]. Thats his. [ bleep ]. Thats mine. From the car seat. [ bleep ] face. Also careys. Channing okay. Whats yours . I dont think shes ever i dont think uhuh. I dont think shes done one. One of mine. [ laughter ] channing thats me and my wife. No, thats not me, thats you. Only done it once or twice. Channing what are we going to hear you perform . What about us. [ cheers and applause ] channing you and i are going to do a little thing thing, maybe possibly down the road. We are, were doing a thing. Channing doing a thing. My moms really excited. Channing because of the youll see, theres a surprise. [ cheers and applause ] like, mom, you cant come. Cant come. Channing why . I did tell a couple of moms they couldnt come. Channing why . The more moms the merrier. Thats just fun. Not mine. The first time my mom met carey was in a bar. She pulled his shirt up because hes got tattoos. 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Re like new savory grilled mediterranean shrimp. And new sweet and spicy Nashville Hot shrimp. Plus our classics like garlic shrimp scampi. Try as much as you want however you want em, but dont wait, it ends soon. Dicky the Jimmy Kimmel Live Concert Series is presented by mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. The song is called beautiful trauma. Here with the song what about us pink la da da da da la da da da da da da da we are searchlights we can see in the dark we are rockets pointed up at the stars we are billions of beautiful hearts and you sold us down the river too far what about us what about all the times you said you had the answers what about us what about all the broken happy ever afters what about us what about all the plans that ended in disaster what about love what about trust what about us we are problems that want to be solved we are children that need to be loved we were willing we came when you called but man you fooled us enough is enough hey what about us what about all the times you said you had the answers so what about us what about all the broken happy ever afters what about us what about all the plans that ended in disaster what about love what about trust what about us what about us what about all the plans that ended in disaster what about love what about trust what about us sticks and stones they may break these bones but then ill be ready are you ready its the start of us waking up come on are you ready ill be ready i dont want control i want to let go are you ready ill be ready cause now its time to let them know we are ready what about what about us what about all the times you said you had the answers so what about us what about all the broken happy ever afters what about us what about all the plans that ended in disaster what about love what about trust what about us what about us what about us what about us what about us what about us what about us [ cheers and applause ] we can now repair complex at saortic aneurysmsare, without invasive surgery. If we can do that, imagine what we can do for varicose veins. And if we can precisely treat eye cancer with minimal damage to the rest of the eye, imagine what we can do for glaucoma, even cataracts. If we can use dna to diagnose the rarest of diseases, imagine what we can do for the conditions that affect us all. Imagine what we can do for you. What if Home Security was different . What if it looked different . What if the measure of working, was that you never had to think about it. What if it was so easy to use, you actually used it. [alarm] you have 3 minutes to exit. What if it gave you time, and what you really need from Home Security. A sense of security. Channing thats our show. Id like to thank ellen, pink, guillermo, and of course jimmy kimmel. Jennifer lawrence hosts tomorrow night. Nightline is next. Good night [ cheers and applause ] everybody dance now this is nightline. Tonight, isis in america. Seducing young people, like this North Carolina teenager, from inside their own bedrooms. Isis soldiers, who would wear their socks above their ankles. He started doing that himself. Targeting the isolated. Manipulating their emotions. These videos are dangerously inspirational. A yearlong diane sawyer investigation. The tools of recruitment that you need to look out for. Plus, mural, mural on the wall. Is this the largest of them all . How many brushes did you use . Sometimes a broom. A broom . A broom. A portrait painter to the

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