And featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 739 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh, my goodness. Thats what you want right there. Hot crowd tonight. Welcome to the tonight show. [ cheers and applause ] this is it, baby. You made it. Youre here. Looking good. [ applause ] well, heres what people are talking about. This is pretty big. Here in new york city, everyone is at the u. N. I mean, thats right, the u. N. General assembly kicked off today, and i read that 193 countries will be attending. Yep. Theyre all committed to one goal, making new york city traffic a total nightmare. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] and theyre all going to do it. Theyve been really focused. The worst. Actually, one expert said that because of all the quick meetings, the General Assembly is like speed dating from hell. [ light laughter ] or as thats also known, speed dating. [ laughter and applause ] i mean, when is speed dating good . When is it fun . But after meeting with officials at the u. N. Today, President Trump says theres a a good chance of peace in the middle east. Then he was like, the bad news is i accidentally started a war with greenland. [ laughter and applause ] they say its greenland, but its really snowy there. So fake name. [ laughter ] thats right, trump greeted the other World Leaders at the United Nations this morning, but he needed a little help with his microphone. Check this out. Does red mean its on or its off . [ laughter ] jimmy another question. Where am i . Where am i . Am i somewhere . Where am i . [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that other guy should have been like, red means off. Say whatever you want. [ laughter and applause ] but tomorrow, trump will give his first big speech to the u. N. His aides have been working with him for days so that he stops pronouncing it the un. [ light laughter ] its such an honor to have me addressing the un. [ light laughter ] are you related to kim jong . [ laughter ] is the red light on or does that mean off . [ light laughter ] you guys see this . Yesterday, trump posted a tweet where he referred to kim jongun as rocket man. [ light laughter ] [ audience ohs ] which beats the other nickname he gave him, lil kim. [ laughter and applause ] you know, its just confusing. Steve wow. Jimmy well, its confusing. Steve thats a nickname. Jimmy meanwhile, i read that people in the white house are worried other staffers might be wearing a wire for the russia investigation. Trump assured staffers hes not wearing a wire, its just the outline from his spanx. [ laughter and applause ] its just not a oh, i saw that today is ben carsons 66th birthday. Wow. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, happy birthday. Its a little different on ben carsons birthday. He actually opens his eyes to make a wish. Steve really . [ laughter and applause ] jimmy yeah. The news out of london i read that Prince Charles may not live in Buckingham Palace when he becomes king. Then Queen Elizabeth said, when he becomes king. [ laughter and applause ] i love your optimism, chucky. [ light laughter ] lets get to some sports news here. It came out that kevin durant apparently uses a second twitter handle to argue with fans. [ laughter ] yeah, he has a secret twitter account. Then ted cruz said, you can do that . [ laughter and applause ] you go, no, you cant do that. You can do that . Finally, you guys, i read that a married couple in louisiana was arrested after filming themselves having sex in a a walmart and a burger king. [ light laughter ] [ audience ohs ] of course they were very embarrassed, so they told their friends it was a target and a a wendys. [ laughter and applause ] we have a great show tonight. Give it up for the roots [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy that is unbelievable. Yet again, our audience is the best audience in the world. Did you hear . [ cheers and applause ] they were so its called yeah. Its called its called the soul clap. So if you clap, so if you hear a song and its just like playing. Normally, an audience would be like right . But thats not what our audience did. You played it and the audience did this. Questlove double time. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy i mean, thats what im talking about. That is it. Thank you [ cheers and applause ] we have rhythm. The tonight show has rhythm [ cheers and applause ] we have a fantastic show tonight. She is my bff. Shell be hanging out with us and performing her hit single sorry not sorry. [ cheers and applause ] sorry im not sorry [ light laughter ] steve wow. Jimmy in case she needs it, she wants to rest the vocals. I can steve you can just do them . Jimmy i can ruin that song pretty fast. [ light laughter ] sorry im not sorry [ cheers ] thank you. [ light laughter ] higgins . Steve yuhhuh. [ light laughter ] jimmy tell me you love me. No, no, no, thats the name of demis album. [ laughter ] steve sorry not sorry. Jimmy do you want to hear a a taste of sorry not sorry . Steve you can just bust me off a little tiny piece. Baby im sorry jimmy thats it. [ cheers and applause ] sorry im not sorry its really good. Demi lovato is here, you guys. There she is. [ cheers and applause ] plus this man is a comedy legend, one of the founders of monty python, the brilliant, the hilarious, john cleese is dropping by tonight [ cheers and applause ] oh, i love john cleese steve one of my heroes. Jimmy yeah. John cleese has a new album out called tell me you love me. Steve really . [ light laughter ] jimmy and do you want to hear a taste of this . Steve just bust me off a a tiny little piece. Jimmy this is the new song from john cleese. Its called sorry not sorry. Baby im sorry jimmy all right. Thats it. Thats all i can give you. Steve just a little tiny piece . Jimmy piece of the cleese, dude. [ laughter ] he can take that and do something with that. Steve yeah, he can do that. He can make it a whole thing. Jimmy guys, you know how they say a picture is worth 1,000 words. Well, its also worth one meme. Ill show you what im talking about. Its time for this week in memes. [ cheers and applause ] week in memes week in memes yeah jimmy first up, take a look at this photo of attorney general jeff sessions. [ laughter ] this meme is called, that feeling when you see mom bringing the cheerios to your highchair. [ laughter and applause ] next is a photo of donald and melania trump. [ laughter ] their meme is called, when you sit in the front row at the imax. Oh, yeah. [ laughter and applause ] steve not good. Jimmy no other chairs. Thats a bummer. Next is a photo of angela merkel. [ audience ohs ] [ light laughter ] her meme says, when youre doing your Robert Deniro impression. [ laughter and applause ] questlove officially does steve the worst. Jimmy questlove officially does the worst Robert Deniro. Can you give us a taste . Jus a [ laughter ] it just gets worse and worse. It gets worse. All right, thats it. Perfect, perfect. [ laughter ] okay. It gets worse. I dont know how. Heres a photo of Queen Elizabeth. Steve oh. Jimmy her meme says, when bae say hes sick and then you see him dancing at the club. [ laughter and applause ] steve what . Sorry not sorry jimmy take a look at this classic photo of a monkey. [ audience aws ] his meme says, when you trying to get that perfect tinder pic. All right, good luck. [ laughter and applause ] good luck to you, buddy. Heres a photo of bernie sanders. His meme says, when you thought you were using wifi but you were actually using data. [ laughter and applause ] steve oh. Jimmy what . I cant find [ light laughter ] next, we have a photo of this dog. Its meme says, when you book a a massage through groupon. [ laughter and applause ] steve not good. Jimmy be careful. Steve dont do it. Jimmy now heres a photo of vladimir putin. This ones called, when youre ready to leave the party but bae just started a new conversation. [ laughter and applause ] next ones another photo of a a dog. [ audience aws ] his meme says, when you in the pool and hear that margarita blender. [ laughter and applause ] [ barking ] steve who let the dogs out . Jimmy and finally, heres a a photo [ laughter ] is the owner under the water . Steve yeah, its under the water. Who let the dogs out . [ laughter ] [ gurgling ] [ light laughter ] come on, the baha men. [ gurgling ] [ light laughter ] the baha men are all under water. Jimmy whats he saying . Steve hes saying the party was good the party was jamming [ laughter ] yippeaioh everybodys having a ball those are the words, right . To that song, who let them dogs out . [ light laughter ] im tired. Jimmy who let them dogs out. [ laughter ] finally, heres a photo of kimjong un. His meme says, ermahgerd werby perker. [ laughter and applause ] that was this week in memes. Hey, before we go guys, before we go to commercial, i want to say congratulations to steve higgins, who won an emmy award last night. Steve higgins. [ cheers and applause ] hey, congratulations. You looked fantastic. Steve thank you. Jimmy saturday night live. What a great show. Had such a great season. But you deserve it. I know how hard you worked. Man, oh man, oh man, you look great. Steve higgins. There he is, right there. [ cheers and applause ] steve wow, thank you. Jimmy guys, well be right back with demi lovato [ cheers and applause ] hey allergy muddlers are you one sneeze away from being voted out of the carpool . Try zyrtec® its starts working hard at hour one and works twice as hard when you take it again the next day. Stick with zyrtec® and muddle no more®. Directv has been rated 1 in Customer Satisfaction over cable for 17 years running. But some people still like cable. Just like some people like banging their head on a low ceiling. Drinking spoiled milk. Camping in poison ivy. Getting a papercut. And having their arm trapped in a vending machine. But for everyone else, theres directv. For 1 rated Customer Satisfaction over cable switch to directv. Call 1800directv. Hurricane maria is moving through the caribbean right now, making landfall as a category five storm. Forecasters say maria is following a path that could take it through islands that are just now recovering from hurricane irma. More on that story on our homepage add and a threepointsix magnitude quake struck los angeles overnight near the westwood area. No word yet on any damage. No word yet on any damage. No word yet on any damage. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our first guest is one of the most talented pop stars on the planet. Her new album, tell me you love me, drops next friday. And her line of fabletics workout gear is available now. Ladies and gentlemen yeah, this is what she made these when she first came on our show. [ light laughter ] please welcome my bff, demi lovato, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy demi. Oh, demi. You look gorgeous. Jimmy. Jimmy welcome back to the show. Thank you. Jimmy i love having you on. I love being here. This is my favorite. Jimmy thank you. Thank you so much. Yeah. Jimmy cause weve known each other now for awhile. I mean this is this is old school right there. Jimmy this is an old school sweatshirt. This is like turning into vintage. Kind of. Jimmy it was brandnew and now its vintage. Now its vintage. Jimmy its so rad. I love it so much. And i wear it all the time. But this is its its always fun having you here, because we were original bffs and then we i have something for you. Jimmy you do . I have something for you too. Wait. Jimmy is this like the gift to the magi . Are we exchanging gifts right now . [ light laughter ] jimmy i totally have a gift for you. Because you showed me the older one, i wanted to show you the new one. Jimmy did you make a new i made a new one for you. [ audience aws ] [ applause ] jimmy oh, really . [ laughter and applause ] its our tenth anniversary. Jimmy hey, is it ten tenth anniversary. Is this the tenth time youve been on the show . Its the tenth time ive been on the show with you. Jimmy oh my god, you were such a baby. I know. Jimmy should i put this on now or save it . You can do whatever you want. Jimmy yeah, i have to put it on now, right . Okay. [ cheers and applause ] yeah [ humming ] jimmy i feel like mr. Rogers. [ laughter ] you like demis new song . [ laughter ] thats my mr. Rogers impression. This is so creepy. Jimmy it is creepy. It kind of sounds like ted cruz a little bit. [ light laughter ] oh, look at this. [ cheers and applause ] yay. It looks amazing. Jimmy i love it. I love it. Im keeping the bow too. Okay. Jimmy heres what i did for you. I didnt know this was the tenth time. But i just wanted to make Something Special for you. So im really into making my own pickles. And this is the truth. Really . [ laughter ] jimmy i know. I really am and i got some ball jars. And i really went out and i made you my own you made me pickles . [ light laughter ] jimmy i heard that you like pickles. I love pickles. Jimmy you do . Thank you jimmy so i dated it on the top. Okay. Jimmy i really went for it. I mean, i went to the farm. My bff demi. [ laughter ] jimmy i went to a farm. I got fresh kirby cucumbers. I got i really went for it. I made a brine. I put these crystallize things that keep them crunchy in there. Oh, my god. You are so sweet jimmy i vacuumed sealed it. I have is a video, just real quick. An eightsecond video. Thats me getting it. Thats garlic. Thats the jar. Thats the things. Thats pickles. Thats jalapeno. Thats dill. Thats still brine. I put a vacuum sealer, sucked it in, and there you go. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. Jimmy tell me i made it spicy. Do you like spicy . Uh jimmy you dont. I love spicy. Jimmy oh, my gosh wait. That was such a lie. I love spicy food. Jimmy oh, no i love spicy food. Jimmy i put a pepper in here what are we gonna do . Jimmy, i love spicy food jimmy you got to open these now. Thats the only way to spike the spice. You got to open them now oh my god, okay. Jimmy no, i just did them. I canned them on the does anybody know how to make refrigerator pickles . Where are the people that are crafty . Come on [ light laughter ] quest, you must know how to make refrigerator pickles. Questlove ahh [ light laughter ] jimmy all right look. I love spicy food, jimmy. Jimmy oh, no, you dont. But im writing cause tell me you love me is the name of the album. So i just wrote thank you, sir. [ laughter ] so i just wrote, i wrote love on that pepper right there. And thats [ audience aws ] this is my love pickle for you. [ laughter ] my love no. No, pickle cut that out. Love pickle. Love pickled pepper. A pack of love pack of pickled peppers for you. And you know, maybe take them out. If anybody has any advice online and tell them to despice them, maybe what you can do is soak them in water. [ laughter ] okay. Jimmy i dont know, man. But anyways, i heard that you like pickles. Thank you. This is so sweet. I love them. [ light laughter ] jimmy oh, my god. Oh, my gosh. Youre like, thank you. Ill never eat them. Thank you. [ laughter ] i will. When theyre ready on the 16th. Wait jimmy no, the 16th is a a couple days ago. [ laughter ] theyre ready to go. It will be a year from now. Thank you for that cheese you got me. [ light laughter ] i want to theres so many things we have to discuss here. Okay. Jimmy i want to talk about the album. Lets talk about the album. This is a big deal. It is a big deal. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy sorry not sorry. You put out sorry not sorry. Its blowing up the charts. The video has got like almost 200 million hits on you something crazy like that. You just it was like a video of like a house party at your house. Yeah. Jimmy was it a real video or just a music video . Okay, so it was a music video. Jimmy okay, good. But it was inspired by a a house party that i had. One day i was like, i want to have people over. Like, i had just gone through a a breakup. I was like, im newly single. I want to meet people. I called my friend daveo. I was like, daveo, just invite people over. He was like, okay. So he invited people over. All of a sudden, like, a couple hours later, snoop dogg was there. [ light laughter ] jimmy how did snoop dogg how do you even get snoop dogg to show up . Friends with daveo. And daveo knows everybody. So then, like, French Montana was there and Ty Dolla Sign and wiz khalifa and all these people were there. I was like, wait a second, i just wanted to have a couple people over to hang out, and all of a sudden my house is like filled with pot smoke everywhere. [ laughter ] jimmy now its like a a pajama jammy jam. What am i doing . I was like, no smoking inside get out, get out jimmy well, not with snoop dog you cant. You have to. [ light laughter ] i wasnt gonna tell jimmy thats how he breathes. [ laughter ] i wasnt gonna tell snoop not to smoke in my house. Jimmy no, you cant. I was like, okay, snoop, do what you want. And then my chef came in the next morning and was like, it smells like snoop dogg was here. I was like, no, he literally was. [ laughter ] jimmy its a funny joke, but he actually was here. It really was snoop dogg. Oh, my gosh. Well, the video is awesome, and its totally on fleek. You should check it out. [ laughter ] on youtube. But i do love it and i love that you came in this morning. We did a lip sync conversation thing. Jimmy but youll see what it is tomorrow nights show. Theres other stuff i have to talk about. I want to talk about fabletics. Okay. Jimmy now, how do you come up with this and how do you like workout athletic gear. But its with kate hudson . So kate hudson owns fabletics. And i did a line with fabletics. And we met in the gym, actually. Ironically enough. Jimmy thats perfect. I know. Jimmy on brand. On brand. So on brand. And then came this creation together, and i have a line of athleisure wear that you can wear in the gym and outside of the gym. Jimmy see, thats fantastic. And its crushing. So i want to say congratulations for that. Thank you. Jimmy you have that news, you have this news. And the biggest news is that were going to play a game when we come back. Is that cool . Yes its totally cool. Jimmy its the bff challenge, you guys. Demi lovato when we come back, demi and i are having a best friends challenge. Stick around i love it. [ cheers and applause ] so Many Americans struggle with finances. Starting today, state farm is here to help. Giving us all the chance to simply sit down and learn. Visit letsstarttoday. Com or talk to an agent. It all started when sophia found the Perfect Little mug at marshalls. Then piece by piece, surprise by surprise, she built the greatest guest bathroom ever. Did she expect to get so much bang for so few bucks . No. But great things happen when you choose surprise. Did she expect to get so much bang for so few bucks . Bill assumed his mayo was the best choice. Assume nothing. Just like the leading brand, kraft real mayo is made with high Quality Ingredients at a price you can feel good about no wonder kraft is so good. Sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic tmobiles unlimited now includes netflix on us. Thats right, netflix on us. Get four unlimited lines for just forty bucks each. Taxes and fees included. And now, netflix included. So go ahead, binge on us. Another reason why tmobile is americas best unlimited network. [ mo more, more, more ny ] how do you like it how do you like it more, more, more how do you like it how do you like it how do you like it more, more, more no, no. K up. The all new 2018 camry. Toyota. Lets go places. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome back, everybody. We are hanging out with demi lovato [ cheers and applause ] her new album, tell me you love me, is available on september 29th. I also want to talk about simply complicated on youtube. Yes. Jimmy this is a a documentary like a 24hour this is like a big documentary that youre doing on youtube. Its not 24 hours long. Jimmy no. [ light laughter ] but it is jimmy if you want to, it can be though. It can be. Jimmy it depends how many times you watch it in a loop. Exactly. Its a documentary about my life, and the making of this album called simply complicated. But you get to see the process of making the album, and you also get to learn more about me. Im like more honest ins this documentary than ive ever been, and jimmy you said they were with you the cameras were around all over the place. Yeah, they were with me all the time, the cameras were. Jimmy yeah. Does that make you nervous . Um, i got used to it. I was nervous at first, but then i realized i have Creative Control over it. So if i Say Something i dont want i can just be like, im going to edit that out later. Jimmy yeah, exactly. Yeah. [ light laughter ] so snoop dogg wont be in the documentary. Snoop doggs not going to be in the documentary. Jimmy thats good. Okay, good. Pal, i want to play this game with you, because weve been bffs for a long time now. And i want to play a game called the best friends challenge. Would you like to play . Yes, i would love to play. Jimmy here we go. Lets go. [ cheers and applause ] best friends challenge oh yeah jimmy now, this game works like the newlywed game, but for friends. Were going to take turns reading questions about each other from the best friends box. And then were going to try to write down the same answer. We didnt plan any of this out. In fact, i played this with tina fey, justin timberlake, viola davis, and ive never gotten one question right with any of them. [ light laughter ] but lets change that all tonight. So here we go. This is your marker, and your pad here. Okay. Jimmy ill read the first question here. Okay. Demi, if i were a disney princess, which one would i be . [ light laughter ] all right, times up. Okay. [ light laughter ] jimmy theres no time, all right. Demi, you can show it to that camera. What did you write . What princess would i be . [ drumroll ] oh, i didnt know this. Cinderella is your yeah. Yes. Jimmy i said belle from beauty the beast. [ laughter ] [ sad trombone ] but i put mamma . Jimmy i put maybe moana just in case. [ laughter ] i didnt know. I was just hedging my bets. My girls love moana now, so i didnt want to take their princess. Oh, got it. Jimmy but i would be belle, because thats more my cute. Jimmy remember, im 43 years old. [ laughter ] all right, good. Here we go. Okay. Jimmy all right. Here we go. Ready . Jimmy yes. Is that question one . Yes. Jimmy yeah, perfect. All right. If demi was stranded on a a Deserted Island jimmy oh, no. What one thing would she bring with her . Jimmy definitely not spicy pickles. [ laughter ] what would she bring oh [ laughter ] okay. Ready . Okay. Jimmy heres my answer. Your two dogs, batman and the other one. The other one [ laughter ] and cinderella. Jimmy oh, thats right. Cinderella and batman what did you say . I said my iphone. Jimmy oh, my gosh come on [ laughter ] [ sad trombone ] im a terrible owner. Im a terrible jimmy you were talking about your dogs. You love your dogs. I know, but if you had your iphone, you might get service, and you might could call your way off the island. Jimmy i dont even get service in new york city. I mean come on. [ light laughter ] Deserted Island. All right, i will read the next question. Here we go. Ready . I should have said that. Jimmy if we were going to bingewatch a tv show together, what show would we pick . I know this is not going to be right. Jimmy this is going to be right. My bff. What did you say . [ light laughter ] what did i walking dead. I know. Jimmy thats similar. Its my favorite show. Jimmy i said riverdale, which is [ light laughter ] [ sad trombone ] thats too scary for me. Really . Jimmy i cant do that. Riverdale, archie this is scary enough for me. This murder. [ light laughter ] jugheads involved. Its a great show, riverdale. On the cw. All right [ light laughter ] okay, ready . Jimmy yeah. If we became one person and had to combine our names, what would our new name be . [ light laughter ] jimmy do we do a similar concept . We got to get this one, bff. [ drumroll ] all right. We have to combine our names. What is your answer . Jemitria. [ laughter ] jimmy similar. Jimi. There you go. [ laughter and applause ] demi lovato, everybody demis performing for us later in the show [ cheers and applause ] check out her new album, tell me you love me, on september 29th. And her fabletics workout gear is available now. Well be right back with john cleese come on back. [ cheers and applause ] get on up. Get on up, mama. Get on up. Do what you want. Do you want, let the record hop. Degree motionsense. Ultimate freshness. With every move. The more you move, the more it works. Degree, it wont let you down. Schick hydro ® vs a lube strip. With seven hydrating gel pools. That give you 40 less friction. Its designed like no other razor to protect from irritation. Schick hydro ® free your skin. ® we dont just want to watch games cable gives us. We want all the teams, no matter where we live with directv nfl sunday ticket. We want falcons in new york. Jets in la. Bears in new orleans. Or buccaneers in a quaint, little new england bed and breakfast. Can you please pass the marmalade, charlie . I sure can, crazy pirate. Switch to directv and get every game, every sunday with nfl sunday ticket. Call 1800directv. But their nutritional needs vremain instinctual. D, thats why theres purina one true instinct. Nutrientdense, proteinrich, real meat number one. This is a different breed of natural nutrition. Purina one, true instinct. You totanobodys hurt, new car. But there will still be pain. It comes when your Insurance Company says theyll only pay threequarters of what it takes to replace it. What are you supposed to do . Drive threequarters of a car . Now if you had Liberty Mutual new car replacement™, youd get your whole car back. I guess they dont want you driving around on three wheels. Smart. With Liberty Mutual new car replacement™, well replace the full value of your car. Liberty stands with you™. Liberty mutual insurance. Well, before it was even founded, a french teenager, bienville, scared away a british warship with just a story. And Great Stories kept coming. Like when the military came and built the boats to win the war. [warplane] some are tales told around crowded tables. [streetcar rumble] and others are performances fit for the stage. Stella cause for three hundred years, Great Stories have started the same way. One time, in new orleans. [crowd applause] grown right here in california, with absolutely no antibiotics ever. A better way to grow, a better way to eat. And it starts with foster farms simply raised chicken. California grown with no antibiotics ever. Wea whole new place thatswe lookin to get scared laughter now halloween time is in dineyland and disney california Adventure Parks [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guest is nothing short of a comedy legend. You can see him on his upcoming tour called john cleese live on stage with a screening of monty python the holy grail. For ticket information, go to montypython. Com. Please welcome the very funny, the always entertaining john cleese [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome, welcome, welcome back to the show. It is great to have you here. I remember last time i was here, do you remember what happened . We were the pythons, we all came out. Jimmy yes. I shook hands with jimmy first. Is it fallon or kimmel . I can never [ laughter ] jimmy is it fallon . I shook hands with jimmy first, and while you were shaking hands with the others, i came round and sat in this chair. Jimmy yeah, and then you and you never batted an eyelid. You just came and sat here. [ light laughter ] and i then stole your questions. Started to ask the questions, and you answered them in a a perfect british accent. Really brilliant. Jimmy well i was just so happy you are brilliant. I love you, and you look fantastic. I do. Jimmy yes. [ laughter ] do you feel as good as you look . Because youre very, very, very old. [ laughter ] i am. Im astonishingly old. Ive forgotten how old i am. Jimmy yeah. Just ballpark. Wait a moment, i have to think. No, im 77. Jimmy are you really . [ cheers and applause ] 77 jimmy you look phenomenal are you kidding me . No, but its very nice, you know, being this old. Jimmy yeah. Because when youre this old, youre going to die soon, so you dont give a [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you really are you are not afraid of death. Youre fine. No, im not. Im not afraid of death. I mean, ive been thinking about it a lot, because you do as you get older. And i thought, well, most of the best people are dead. [ laughter ] jimmy thats my favorite line anyones ever said. [ laughter ] ever. Most of the best people are dead. They are. And there are an awful lot of really awful people still alive. [ laughter ] and most of them are in charge. Jimmy yeah. [ cheers and applause ] no names. No names. Jimmy no names. No names. Jimmy youll be in good company. Yeah. I want to talk about the upcoming tour, because i just i love the title of the tour. It rolls off the tongue. John cleese live on stage with a screening of monty python the holy grail. [ light laughter ] and that is can i what can we expect from that . Oh, i jimmy, it is the easiest money ive ever made. [ light laughter ] jimmy no, no. No, make up a story. What . Jimmy make up a story about how youre psyched to be on the road. Oh, sorry. Its such a thrill to be back on the road again. [ laughter ] its just what i do. I dont even have to turn up at the theater when the show starts, because they show monty python the holy grail. And everyone in america thinks its such a wonderful movie. I dont particularly like it. [ light laughter ] so i go out after ive had dinner, because while theyre watching the [ bleep ] film, im having dinner. [ light laughter ] i go out and we talk about it for an hour and a quarter. And look, theres two things. First of all, theyre preselected to like python jimmy yeah, all right. So theyre not going to be horrible to me. Jimmy yeah. And the other thing is, ive forgotten. [ laughter ] jimmy now, one point of the [ laughter ] well delivered. What about all the people who are dead . I mean, Abraham Lincoln jimmy no, we passed no we passed no, weve done that already. Dead as a door nail. [ bleep ] jimmy at one point, after the screening of monty python, one will go out in the audience, and have questions from the audience for you, john cleese. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy and you answer the questions. And i love that. Jimmy you do. I love that. I mean, i hate it when they say, whats your favorite python sketch . I mean, what a boring question that is. [ light laughter ] i hate it, but sometimes jimmy you like spontaneous questions. I like spontaneous questions. Theres two i really love. When i was once in norway, in oslo, a norwegian stood probably about 40 years of age stood up, and he said, mr. Cleese, may i ask you a a question . I said, of course you may. He said, if you had to be a a component part of an aircraft [ laughter ] what component part of an aircraft would you choose to be . [ laughter ] jimmy thats a great question. Great question. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah. [ laughter ] i mean, that wins right there. Dont tell anyone. Go see john cleeses on tour. Can we take the best one jimmy oh, yeah. Im not joking here. Eric and i eric idle and i were in florida, and we toured together. And a nice woman, i cant remember the town, stood up, middle of the stalls and she said, mr. Idle, mr. Cleese, may i ask you a serious question . Of course. She said, did the queen kill diana . [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] jimmy john thats dangerous, jimmy. Thats dangerous. The band is laughing. Jimmy yeah. [ laughter ] that means were in trouble with the censors. Jimmy the band is laughing. So i was able to say, well certainly not with her bare hands. [ laughter ] jimmy thats actually a a great a great answer. Well, i thought maybe a fun bit we could do tonight is i could go in the audience, and have anyone from our crowd ask john a obnoxious, a crazy question. Your producer told me that and i said it was fine. Jimmy sounds perfect, yes. Here we go. These are unselected people though. We dont even have them selected. Could be anyone. Raise your hand if you have a a question for john cleese. Over here jimmy ill start in the back. Yeah, hey, buddy. This guy looks very, very eager. Yes, right there, buddy. Did you go to school with the queen . Jimmy did you go to school with the queen . I had lunch with the queen. [ light laughter ] i had lunch with the queen once at Buckingham Palace and it was very nice. It was boring, but it was very nice. [ laughter ] nobody wanted to say anything interesting in case somebody was offended. So i thought, poor woman. I mean, if she asks some of these people there, there was a a guy who ran a prison, and there was a lecturer in anatomy from oxford. And then she wasnt able really to relax, and ask interesting questions. But everyone was terribly nice, and polite, and it was very nice food. [ light laughter ] jimmy good question. Anyone, question for john cleese . Yeah, you have a question for john cleese . What kind of underwear do you wear . [ light laughter ] jimmy what kind of underwear do you wear . Underwear . [ laughter and applause ] jimmy you know what underwear is, right . You know what underwear is . Ever since i was 75, i go commando. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy question for john cleese. Yes, right here. John, are you as upset as i am that you got snubbed by the academy for your role in rat race . [ laughter ] thats a very good point. [ laughter ] jimmy very good point. Thank you for asking that. [ applause ] its a very good point. We have time for one more question, one more question, one more question, one more question. Yes, what do you have to ask john cleese . Id like to ask john cleese, what did you look like before you had all the Plastic Surgery . Well, before i had the work done, i looked a lot like richard gere. [ laughter ] and so i asked them to take the nose down a bit, you know, open the eyes a little bit, and i took the wig off, and you know. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy he has a second question here. The second question is what is your favorite monty python sketch . You [ bleep ] idiot i told you jimmy you stop, john, stop hes a fan john, hes a fan of yours please john cleese, everybody [ cheers and applause ] demi lovato performs for us next. Stick around. Stop it. Will you, please hes a fan of yours. Hes a fan [ cheers and applause ] sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic sfx tmobile mnemonic sfx netflix mnemonic tmobiles unlimited now includes netflix on us. Thats right, netflix on us. Get four unlimited lines for just forty bucks each. Taxes and fees included. And now, netflix included. So go ahead, binge on us. Another reason why tmobile is americas best unlimited network. It all started when sophia found the Perfect Little mug at marshalls. Then piece by piece, surprise by surprise, she built the greatest guest bathroom ever. Did she expect to get so much bang for so few bucks . No. But great things happen when you choose surprise. Liz assumed all dressingsrust much bwere made equal. Ucks . Assume nothing. Just like the leading brands, these kraft dressings are made with high Quality Ingredients, at a price you can feel good about. No wonder kraft is so good. The world is not flat. You cant just pinch it or swipe it. Theres a whole world out there and no other card lets you experience it like the platinum card. Backed by the service and security of american express. Hey, leggo my eggo. Hat needs . Uh uh. Not ccc cause i have the and i i. Thats a lot. Raisins. Really . What just happened here . You know the rules. I make the rules. Know the rules. Keep your eggo. Leggo my eggo. Im doing this for you, dad. Thanks son. Oh, you yeah ht butch. butch growls at man hes looking at me right now, isnt he . Yup. butch barks at man butch is like an old soul that just hates my guts. laughs vo you can never have too many faithful companions. Introducing the allnew crosstrek. Love is out there. Find it in a subaru crosstrek. Whatd ya think . Were almost there. Um, on the jingle though, brad, i want to feel it right here. Hmmhmm. Like here, in the chest . No, no, your heart. Heart. In your heart. Hmmhmmhmmhmmhmmhmmhmm. Yes close. Close. Were almost there. Almost. I basically got it, right . Basically, almost. But youre doing great. What did i just get into . Hmm . Nothing. Ouch new bandaid® brand skinflex™ bandages. Our best bandage yet it dries almost instantly. Better . Yeah. Good thing because stopping never crosses your mind. Bandaid® brand. Stick with it™ [ mo more, more, more ny ] how do you like it how do you like it more, more, more how do you like it how do you like it how do you like it more, more, more a mihappy birthday, sweetie oh, millies. Trick or treat were so glad to have you here. What if we treated great female scientists like they were stars . Yasss queen what if millie dresselhaus, the first woman to win the National Medal of science in engineering, were as famous as any celebrity . [millie dresselhaus was seen having lunch today. ] [. Rumors of the new discovery. ] what if we lived in a world like that . crowd applauding we know a place thats already working on it. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh, we love her. Performing her new single, sorry not sorry, once again, demi lovato [ cheers and applause ] now im out here looking like revenge feelin like a ten the best i ever been and yeah i know how bad it must hurt to see me like this but it gets worse now youre out here looking like regret aint too proud to beg Second Chance youll never get and yeah i know how bad it must hurt to see me like this but it gets worse wait a minute now payback is a bad chick and baby im the baddest you playin with a savage cant have this cant have this ah and itd be nice of me to take it easy on ya but nah baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry being so bad got me feelin so good showing you up like i knew that i would baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry feeling inspired cause the tables have turned yeah im on fire and i know that it burns baby fineness is the way to kill tell me how it feels bet its such a bitter pill and yeah i know you thought you had bigger Better Things bet right now this stings wait a minute cause the grass is greener under me bright as technicolor i can tell that you can see and yeah i know how bad it must hurt to see me like this but it gets worse now payback is a bad chick and baby im the baddest stop playin with a savage cant have this cant have this ah and itd be nice of me to take it easy on ya but nah baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry being so bad got me feelin so good showing you up like i knew that i would baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry feeling inspired cause the tables have turned yeah im on fire and i know that it burns talk that talk baby better walk better walk that walk baby if you talk if you talk that talk baby better walk better walk that walk baby oh yeah talk that talk baby better walk better walk that walk baby if you talk if you talk that talk baby better walk better walk that walk baby ah yeah baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry being so bad got me feelin so good showing you up like i knew that i would baby im sorry im not sorry baby im sorry im not sorry feeling inspired cause the tables have turned yeah im on fire and i know that it burns not sorry [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh my goodness Demi Lovato Demi lovato, tell me you love me is out september 29th. Well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ah the moon belongs to everyone the best things in life theyre free stars belong to everyone they cling there for you and for me flowers in spring the robins that sing the sunbeams that shine theyre yours and their mine love can come to everyone the best things in life theyre free dilike, outside dirt,. Thats not a bad thing. Also, it comes off. Inside dirt, yeah. Thats way different. But now theres a more powerful chevron with techron. Yeah. It has even more cleaning power to clean up deposits left by low quality gas. And cleaning up deposits restores lost gas mileage. Its legit. Now with more cleaning power. Chevron with techron. Care for your car. Nice hat food. Water. Internet. We need it to live. But what we dont need are surprises, like extra monthly fees. I see you, fee, played by legendary actress anjelica huston. You got me, mark. We just want fast internet for one, simple rate. For all the streaming and the shopping and the newsing, but most of all. For the this. Internet for one everyday simple price and no extra monthly fees. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy my thanks to demi lovato [ cheers and applause ] john cleese. [ cheers and applause ] and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thank you for watching. Have a great night. I hope to see you tomorrow. Byebye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers. Tonight amy poehler, host of msnbcs deadline white house, nicolle wallace, featuring the 8g band with daru jones. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. Seth good evening. Im seth meyers. This is late night. Hows everybody doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] in that case, lets say we get to the news. Georgias sixth Congressional District held a highly anticipated special election last night between democratic upstart jon ossoff and repuan