[ laughter ] >> we really wanted to focus on the marriage and their relationship with the parents. >> hi. i'm ray and i live here in long island with my wife debra. >> the very first season ray says in the opening credits. >> it's not really about the kids. >> it's not about the kids. >> i say that for every year you're over 40, you should add an inch to the hem line of your dress. >> well, then you should be dragging around a persian rug. >> we all had parents who despite our best efforts reject all of our kindness and it backfires. >> i don't understand why you would use bleach on these