Transcripts For COM The 20240706

[cheering] welcome to the daily show. My name is kal penn, and i will be your host for this week. Now, you might know me from my work as an actor or my work with president barack obama. [cheering] yeah. Yeah, i plan on dropping his name all week. Anyway, weve got a great show for you tonight, including a very special interview with president joe biden. [cheering] he is a man who i know well from my time working for barack obama. But first, lets get into the headlines. [cheering] of course, last night was the academy awards, and hashtag oscarssoasian . [cheering] hell yeah thats right. Thats right. It was an incredible night for the asianamerican community. So many asian artists won and thanked their parents, which was, like, so nice. Although, honestly, if their parents are anything like mine, they were probably just like, ok. Lets move on from movies to music and some big news for a hot new artist. Reporter a new song credited to donald trump and the j6 choir is now topping the itunes music chart. Justice for all features the former president along with a group of men in prison for the january 6 attack on the capitol. Chorus singing what so proudly we hail at the twilights last gleaming. Donald trump i pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of america. Chorus whose broad stripes and bright stars wow. I cant believe im saying this, but those guys should stick to insurrecting. This song is such a turd. Im surprised its on itunes and not Nancy Pelosis desk. This is so bad mike pence heard it, and he hanged himself. [laughter] and why are they calling themselves donald trump and the january 6 choir . Coup and the gang is right there [laughter] anyway, lets get to todays big news, the collapse of Silicon Valley bank. I know its impossible to believe that a town that could spend half a Million Dollars on this ape would have financial problems. But somehow it happened. Svb was the 16th largest bank in the country and the Favorite Bank of tech bros, disrupters, and anyone whos ever invented uber but for weed. So heres what happened, ok . Svb invested a lot of their clients money on a bet that Interest Rates wouldnt go up. And when Interest Rates did go up, they started losing their clients money. Then they told their clients, hey, um, dont freak out, but were losing your money. So, of course, everyone immediately freaked out and ran to the bank to take out all their money before it collapsed, which then caused the bank to collapse. It was like that bank run scene from its a wonderful life but if everyone was wearing patagonia vests. [laughter] and look, people are legitimately scared this could spread to banks across the country. So to stop the panic the federal government took the bank over and promised everyone that theyd get their money back. And its kind of funny because some of the companies who had money at the bank were screaming on social media that the government needed to come and save them. Thats right. All those tech bros who complain about being under the governments yoke were suddenly like, oh, no, my moneys gone. highpitched yoke me, daddy. [laughter] so thats basically what happened. But if youre looking for an explanation of why svb failed that doesnt require you to learn about Interest Rates, well, fox news got you covered. Part of the problem was is that this was one of those woke banks. They were one of the most woke banks in their quest for the esgtype policy. This bank theyre so concerned with dei and politics and all kinds of stuff. This bank, Silicon Valley bank, they had been focused on a lot of these social issues in the last weeks and months leading up to this collapse. Yeah, they had a monthlong lgbtq month of activities just before the bank collapsed. I think the Senior Vice President of Risk Management at the bank was heavily focused on lgbtq programs. The female head of Risk Management spent a lot of time spearheading what critics would call woke programs such as a safe space for comingout stories. Oh, right, the female head of Risk Management, that explains it. She probably spent the banks money on shoes and abortions. For more on Silicon Valley bank, we go to michael kosta. Whoa. [cheering] michael, where are you . Well, where does it look like i am . Im at Silicon Valley banks headquarters. Looks like youre at a gay nightclub, man. This is just what a woke bank looks like, kal. The first floor is a gay nightclub. Second floor is a gay bathhouse. And the third floor is gay accounting. Ok, well, whats your impression of svbs collapse . Seems clear to me that its a result of rising Interest Rates forcing the bank to sell its bonds at a loss. Thats so naive, kal. No, the reason the bank collapsed is because of woke. What do you mean woke . How did that collapse a bank . It just did, kal. Woke. Dei, esg, poc, aoc, bet, the list is endless, and the list is woke. I dont see what any of this has to do with a bank failing. Well, thats because youre not a trained economist like i am. But once you learn the history, you discover that every bank crisis that has ever happened has happened because of woke. Theres no way thats true. Oh, come on. Women get the right to vote in 1920. Nine years later, the great depression, ok . How about this . Segregation ends in 64. 17 years later, the recession of 81 hits. Coincidence . Come on, man. You cant connect these. Women and black people are not behind all bank collapses. Of course not, kal. Sometimes its gay peoples fault, ok . Just look at the names behind the 2008 financial crisis laymen brothers, goldman sachs, bear stearn, rusty trombone investments. Its all major gay Financial Institutions that lost money. Ive never heard of rusty trombone investments. Well well, they lost a lot of my money. Look, forget your theories for a minute. What can consumers do to keep their money safe . Its easy. Skip the banks and keep all your money in your wallet like i do. That way when i need some money that way when i need some oh, my god, someone stole my wall i know who it was. Oh, thats terrible. Who was it . It was woke. All right, man. Ok. Good luck with that. Michael kosta, everybody. [cheering] all right. When we come, back my interview with president joe biden. Dont go away. [cheering] you inspired the lexus es to be, well. More you. So thank you. We hope you like your work. what does it mean when people say america is the land of opportunity . It means the power to discover. To redefine yourself. To improve yourself. To challenge yourself. To realize theres more in you than you ever knew that you could do. 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Yoyou ght t beurprpris call the barnes firm now when that car hit my motorcycle, yoyou ght t beurprpris insurance wasnt fair. So i called the barnes firm, it was the best call i couldve made. Call the barnes firm now, and find out what your case could be worth. Call one eight hundred, eight million uhhhhhhh wait just ill get it back in a second. Try turning it on and off. I just got a spoiler suspenseful music sfx [crunch] battery tostitos® hearty dippers™. Anyone have a charger . Tostitos® hearty dippers™. [cheering] welcome back to the daily show. Last week, i had the opportunity to interview the president of the United States at the white house. We talked about our divided country and how young peoples advocacy can affect policy on climate, drilling, and human rights. Mr. President , welcome to the daily show. Well, welcome back to the white house. Thank you. Its very nice to be back. I was trying to figure out when the last time you and i had a conversation was. And i realized it was november 2016 at a very diverse diwali party that you hosted just a few weeks after trump became the president elect. And i remember just feeling so positive and so much hope there. Then i remember just four years of policy and vitriol under trump. And now things feel more divided. So i was curious how you feel that we can stay hopeful, and how can we get the country to unify . The truth of the matter is im never more optimistic in my entire life about no, i mean it now. I tell you what. Look, if you think about it, the reason i had not given my words of i hadnt planned on running again. I had lost my son beau. It was a tough, tough time. And i wasnt going to run at all for real. And then remember what happened in charlottesville . Then President Trump said there were very fine people on both sides. And i give my word, thats when i decided im going to do this. And i did it for three reasons one, to restore the soul of this country. Thats not who we are. Were a decent, honorable country that cares. We really are. We still are. Second one is to, you know, begin to take care of the middle class. Because the middle class does well. The poor have a real shot, and the wealthy do very well. And thirdly, to unite the country. And at the time, people thought, well, maybe the first two, but youll never unite the country. But look what we did. We got a lot done. No one thought i could ever pass the infrastructure bill. No one thought i could ever do anything about making sure that we took care of people with disabilities and drug prices and whole range of no one thought we could do anything on the environment. No one thought we could do anything about samesex marriage. I mean, we did we did not all of it, but a significant portion of it was done in a bipartisan way. When i was a white house aide, i remember having meetings in this room on climate. They didnt always go so well. And i never would have imagined 12 years ago that something as sweeping on climate as the Inflation Reduction Act would have happened. So my question really and i was watching all of this unfold is who or what created the political space for you to take that kind of action . Young people. Young people. A generation that generation between 18 and 35 now. Theyre the ones who created the space. They had enough of it. They had enough of it. I mean, they showed up in the 2020 election. They showed up in the 2022 election. And we passed the largest environmental plan in all of history, over 368 billion. We got it done. And what happened was Mother Nature let her wrath be seen over the last two years. For example, i have traveled on helicopter over more forest area burned to the ground than the entire state of maryland. Thats how much is burned to the ground. Floods, droughts, all the things. And so people cant deny it anymore. If we dont keep the temperature from going above 1. 5 degrees celsius, raised, now, were in real trouble. That whole generation is damned. I mean, thats not hyperbole really, truly in trouble. And thats why the first meeting i had with the socalled g7 they want to talk about what was my initiative on energy, on dealing with moving toward. For example, i called all the automakers and truckmakers and asked them to come to the south lawn the first year, and to try to talk them into doing something more than going electric. And within five weeks, all of them agreed theyre going to go electric 50 by 2030, and by 2050, all electric. And i think we can do it. Youre also responsible for reviewing, drilling, and oil production. Yes. What would you say to those young people who want you to continue to be their champion, but might not think that youre going far enough or fast enough on climate . Well, first of all, were going faster than anyones ever gone. Were going to need fossil fuels for at least the next 10 years. Its not like tomorrow, we can turn it all off, number one. And so were going to need fossil fuel. What we have to do is we have to ive said, no more drilling off our ocean i mean, the whole range. But it still has to be there has to be the ability to generate some energy. But we can get rid of coal much more rapidly. And by the way, for example, i was up in massachusetts, one of the largest coal producing electric facilities in the nation. Well, guess what . We hooked it up to wind technology. And so now, its cheaper. We can do solar. We can do wind cheaper than we can do fossil fuels. So its a matter of transitioning, but its not like you can cut everything off immediately. You you obviously understand the existential threat that young people feel when it comes to climate. Joe biden sure. How do you balance that with the immediate concerns of babysitting congress, or getting 51 or 60 votes on some of this . Joe biden well, look, ive been really be careful here. Sure, yeah. Im relatively successful right. In working across the aisle. There is a maga republican portion of the party. It makes up about 1 3 of the Republican Party. But there are a lot of people in the Republican Party who are traditional republican, conservative republicans that you can deal with. But this gentlewoman from the state of georgia and the mountains up there and others, ok . And anyway. Thats very diplomatic. I would have used different language, but youre joe biden no, but its theres an existential question that the Republican Party is going to have to face, and its going to determine what happens in the next couple of years. But my focus is, just stay focused on the things that matter. Weve got to deal with the climate. Weve got to deal with Civil Liberties and voting rights. Weve got to deal with issues relating to economic growth. Look, in this period, i inherited i think its fair to say a gigantic mess, economically and politically. Weve created 12 million new jobs since ive been president more than any president has created in four years. Weve generated so much growth. Weve created 800,000 manufacturing jobs with the bill that became a bipartisan bill, which no one thought could happen. So theres so much going on, that the country is hungry to move, i think, and im confident we can do it. I wanted to ask you a slightly different question. So my partner, josh, and i have been engaged for the last five years, which really only means that every auntie and uncle that i have is beyond disappointed that there hasnt been a wedding yet. But cardi b is going to marry us, apparently officiate our wedding, which would be nice. But my question for you, mr. President , is you codified support for samesex marriage and interracial marriages like ours. Im curious what your evolution was like on marriage equality, and what the federal government might be able to do to protect lgbtq americans, especially trans kids, who are dealing with all these regressive state laws that are popping up right now. I can remember exactly where my epiphany was. I hadnt thought much about it, to tell you the truth. And i was a senior in high school. And my dad was dropping me off. I remember about to get out of the car, and i look to my right, and two welldressed men in suits kissed each other. I mean, they gave each other a kiss. And then, one went, looked like he was heading to the department building, and one looked like he headed to the Hercules Corporation building. And ill never forget, i turned and looked at my dad. He said, joey, its simple. They love each other. Its simple. No, im not joking. Its simple. They love each other. And its never been its never been its just that simple. It doesnt matter whether its whether its samesex or a heterosexual couple. You should be able to be married. What is the problem . So listen to your auntie and your uncle. Get married. Do it now. [laughs] dont wait. Now, transgender kids is a really harder thing. Whats going on in florida is, as my mother would say, close to sinful. I mean, its just terrible, what theyre doing. Its not like a kid wakes up one morning and says, you know, i decided i want to become a man, or i want to become a woman, or i want to change. I mean, what are they thinking about here . Theyre human beings. They love. They have feelings. They have inclinations that are i mean, it just, to me, is i dont know. Its cruel. And the way we do it is, we make sure we pass legislation like we passed on samesex marriage. You mess with that, youre breaking the law, and youre going to be held accountable. Thank you, sir. I also can tell that some auntie or my mom probably texted you beforehand if joe biden no, no, no. If youre trying to pressure me to joe biden no, no, but get moving, man. I dont want to hear you cant do it. Thank you, mr. President. Thank you for your time, and i appreciate you very much. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Stay tuned. Because when we come back, President Biden takes us inside the oval office. Dont go away. [cheering, applause] vo red lobsters finer points of fun dining the correct answer to starter or entree is who gives a shrimp, when you get both. Introducing new dockside duos. Get an individualsize starter and entree for just 15. 99. Welcome to fun dining. When i was but a child. Eating heinz on spaghetti. I hoped and wished that i could be a grownup already. Adulting sucks [background singers echo] adulting sucks you have to eat healthy. All the time . But fortunately. Your ketchup can be, no sugar added heinz. Topo chico hard seltzer. Mexicaninspired flavors. But fortunately. Crisp taste, crafted with soul. Always refreshing. Always diferente. Because your lives are forever entwined. Im falling in love with you over and over again love entwined. Shop the mothers day sale to get 30 off almost everything. Only at kay. Text from mom. Oh, good luck on your date. Thats uh she looks like a keeper. Thats embarrassing. Does she come from money . Hashtag sugar mama. Text from mom. Whoa sfx [crunch] text from mom. Bride emoji. Baby emoji. Tostitos® hearty dippers™. Summer ales on me woohoo whose pool is this anyway . Hiya none of us know . Sam adams summer ale. Light and citrusy. Perfect for summer. Welcome back to lthe daily show. Y. Lets take it back to the white house or, as my College Buddies called it when i worked there, the tight house. Now, ive been fortunate enough to be in the oval office a few times. But today, i get to bring you with me. Well walk on a place you spent some time. Thank you sir i have the fireplace never been on what ive been in. I tell you what, i have it on all the time. Its kind of humbling, walking in here. Absolutely. I mean, for real. I had my brother, jimmy, come in and pick the rug and the desk and all that stuff. And make a long story short, i come walking in, like 5 00 on inauguration day, and i walked in, and i said, jesus. Ive never seen franklin roosevelt. Im an admirer, but its always George Washingtons small portrait there, and abraham lincoln. And jon meacham that president s historian. Jimmy had called him for some help. And he looked, and he said, because no ones ever inherited a World Economy in as much disarray as he had. And i said, oh, thats wonderful. Yeah, that tracks. And then, i said, well, why lincoln . And he said, the country has never been as divided since lincoln was president. But what i did was i wanted to be able to sit here at my desk and look out. And i only had two political heroes when i was getting involved. That fellow over there Martin Luther king and bobby kennedy. I was a great admirer of john kennedy. But i could never picture john kennedy at my kitchen table. I could kind of picture, maybe and then, the two people who i got involved engaged with cesar chavez. Because i got, not involved, but i supported, verbally, the Farm Workers Union they were trying to organize in delaware when i was running as a 29yearold kid. And his granddaughter works for me. And then, rosa parks, whos over here and so i tried to i tried to make it, kind of, warm like i thought about, not the other guy never showed up on inauguration day, so i didnt have to worry about it. But its kind of neat. And the things ive done in here like, for example, the moon rock over here. All right. Im a huge nasa fan, a big astronomy fan. Are you really . This is very cool. Well, this is cool. Thats an actual moon rock. And one of the that rover they have up there . Kal penn yeah. Joe biden my name is in the back, with other president s. Oh, thats cool. Its really cool. But i want to show you something really cool. Come on back here. Not many people come back this way, but come on in. Kal penn voiceover oh, yeah. Not only are we seeing the oval office, were also getting a rare tour of the president s private study. This is like the worlds most dignified episode of mtv cribs. And by the way, that is a wyeth painting by jamie wyeth, the son. And he told me the Kennedy Family didnt like it, because they made him look too contemplative. Oh. But hes got to smile. I know. I think its great. But anyway, and thats the house i was raised in in scranton. Oh, thats awesome. Wow. Or as they say, scranton. Scranton. So i went and spoke at the Kennedy Library a couple of times. The last time i spoke there, i get handed this by caroline kennedy. And its that famous letter he wrote. Kal penn wow. Joe biden and this is the actual copy. And its, why am i going . We chose to go to the moon in this decade, because that goal will serve the origins of measure by the best of us. And it goes on and on. Kal penn well, thats i mean, just even that top line, no prejudice, no hate in outer space. Bingo. I dont know if you have any tattoos. Ive got some from the nasa voyager, which was launched in 77. But the golden record, which had science, music, art, but no politics, no war, no religion, none of the things that divide us and so its just the idea of hope through exploration. Kal penn voiceover unfortunately, before the president showed me all of his tattoos, it was time to go. Thanks. Thank you, sir. I really appreciate your time, and thank you so much for the stories and the oval tour. [applause] ok, were going to take a quick break, but well be right back after this. [cheering, applause] and this is ready to go online. Any questions . Yeah, i got one. How about the best network imaginable . Lets invent that. Thats what we do here. Quick survey. Who wants the internet to work, pretty much everywhere. And it needs to smooth, like super, super, super, super smooth. Hey, should you be drinking that . Its decaf. Because were busy women. We dont have time for lag or buffering. Who doesnt want internet that helps a. I. Do your homework even faster. Come again. Sorry, what was that . Introducing the next generation 10g network only from xfinity. The future starts now. Thats our show for tonight but before we go, please consider supporting the magic city acceptance center. Theyre a nonprofit dedicated to providing an inclusive space for the Lgbtq Community in alabama. If you can support them in their work, please donate at the link below. Now, here it is your moment of zen. If not this time to run for president , would you think at some time, its safe to say that that would be one of your goals . I would only i would only do stuff if i thought there was a rationale for me to accomplish things on behalf of the people. So its all substance, driven about whether i could serve or not serve in a variety of capacities. Chap chchcheerio and welcome to tonights bareknuckle boxing championship bout, where the action is set to get underway in just a matter of metric seconds