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And featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 604 British Columbia steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh oh, wow thats what im talking about. Looking good hot crowd hot hot crowd tonight. Welcome, everybody. Welcome to the tonight show. This is it. You made it. Youre here [ cheers and applause ] thats what its all about. Heres what people are talking about, everybody. Heres what people are theyre talking about. Its being reported that donald trump doesnt like shaking hands with people. [ laughter ] and even called it barbaric. [ light laughter ] although take a look at this. I think maybe he just doesnt know how to shake hands. Watch this. What . No. Oh, there you go. [ laughter and applause ] its like Michelle Obama said, when they go low, you go, too slow. [ laughter and applause ] of course, people are talking about the inauguration coming up and all the protestors. Well, get this. Donald Trumps Inaugural Committee is actually encouraging protestors to show up on friday saying, quote, well give you cookies and koolaid. [ laughter ] then republicans in congress were like, actually, we drank all the koolaid. So [ applause ] well give you cookies. Steve oh, yeah. Jimmy but theres already been a bit of a setback for trump. The Bruce Springsteen cover band, the b street band [ laughter ] the b street band says it will no longer perform during trumps inauguration. [ audience aws ] then trump said, okay, get me a springsteen cover band cover band. [ laughter ] the z street band. [ applause ] theyre fantastic. Thats right, a Bruce Springsteen cover band has dropped out of playing at Donald Trumps inauguration. [ light laughter ] so far the only acts they have booked are three doors down, toby keith and this [ laughter and applause ] jimmy all right, very good. [ laughter ] i dont know what that was. Another big story lately is trumps twitter fight with congressman john lewis, who trump called all talk and no action. Even though lewis is a a legendary civil rights activist. [ light laughter ] but it turns out trump wasnt done there. I guess he thinks a number of influential figures are pretty overrated, if you look at his twitter. Take a look, trump tweeted, turns out mother theresa didnt even have kids. Fraud [ laughter ] steve wow. Jimmy fraud steve fraud. [ applause ] jimmy i think, you know, he just doesnt get it. Look, he tweeted, Amelia Earhart is why i never hire women drivers. Lost. Steve wow jimmy i mean that is steve thats rude. Jimmy hes out of touch. Steve that is rude. Jimmy i think hes out of touch. [ light laughter ] finally he put, abe lincolns gettysburg address only contained 1,464 characters. Thats less than 11 tweets. I top that in one elevator ride. Sad. [ laughter and applause ] sad. Lets get to some sports. On sunday, a Facebook Live video of Pittsburgh Steelers Coach Mike Tomlin trash talking the new England Patriots went viral. Right . Yeah, but patriots coach Bill Belichick didnt seem too bothered by it, telling a a boston radio station, quote, im not on snapface and all that. [ laughter ] snapface. Belichick went on to say, if tomlin wants to come at me on instagoogle thats his business. [ laughter ] well settle this on the field, not skypee, myface, or tubebook. But please, follow me on pinterest for tips on how to update your Home Interiors for spring. K, byee [ applause ] k, byee guys, last night was another fantastic episode of the bachelor. [ cheers ] yeah. Are you watching . Its all very exciting. And one of the best scenes last night was when a contestant named corrine confessed i know, shes [ light laughter ] the casting is fantastic. Anyway, she confessed that as an adult, she still has a nanny who takes care of her on a a daily basis. If you missed it, dont worry. Because here to reenact that scene with actual lines from the show are the roots own tariq and questlove. Guys. [ cheers and applause ] tariq thanks, jimmy. Tonight ill be playing corrine, a 24yearold Business Owner from miami who is cared for by a nanny. [ light laughter ] questlove and ill be playing jasmine g. , a a probasketball dancer from san francisco, who cant believe that corrine is 24 years old and still has a a nanny. [ laughter ] jimmy fantastic. Whenever youre ready. [ laughter ] tariq imagine trying to handle a baby. I cant even handle myself. I need to get raquel ready for that. Questlove wait. Whos raquel . Tariq raquels my nanny. Questlove your nanny . Tariq yeah. [ laughter ] questlove you have a nanny . Tariq i do. [ laughter ] questlove wait. Do you have kids . Tariq nope. Questlove why do you have a a nanny . [ laughter ] tariq im a kid [ laughter ] shes my nanny questlove youre a kid . Wait. How old are you . Youre 24. And you have a nanny . Tariq raquel, like, keeps my life together, okay . [ light laughter ] she makes sure that my bed is made every morning. She makes my cucumber and my, like, vegetable slices for lunch. [ laughter ] she makes me lemon salad. She knows exactly how much oil, lemon, and garlic salt i like. Oh, and cheese pasta. Ive tried so many times to make cheese pasta and i cant make cheese pasta like her. [ laughter ] questlove wait. Do you wash your own clothes . Tariq i dont. [ laughter ] but she just does it. And you know what . It makes her happy. Im not going to stop a womans happiness [ laughter ] questlove girl, you crazy. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats a very moving scene. Thank you guys questlove [ applause ] questlove and tariq, everyone, right there. Oh, stick the landing, stick the landing stick the landing. Oh, my goodness. Oh my all right. Very nice. Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Quest, thank you, quest, thats good. Very nice. Thats very nice. [ laughter ] cheese pasta. [ light laughter ] those are real lines. You guys, some international news. I read that the top grossing movie in russia last year was zootopia, followed by the secret life of pets. And as it turns out, russias president Vladimir Putin is actually a huge movie fan. Even writes his own reviews. Steve really . Jimmy check some of these out here. First, for the movie la la land, putin wrote [ russian accent ] in russia, if you break into song in middle of the street, you are exiled to siberia. One star. [ laughter and applause ] steve wow. Jimmy one star. Steve one star . Jimmy next, for manchester by the sea, putin wrote [ russian accent ] this is movie about man with dead family, dead brother in winter. Best comedy of year. [ laughter ] four star. [ applause ] he gave it four stars. Steve wow. And he thought it was a comedy. Jimmy finally, for the movie finding dory, putin wrote [ russian accent ] is about chatty character who goes missing in ocean. Wonderful lesson for children. [ laughter ] four star. Lot of great opinions there. We have great show tonight, you guys. Give it up for the roots [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh, yes hot show tonight. Hot show tonight. We have a big week of shows ahead. Tomorrow night, james mcavoy and Nick Offerman will be here. [ cheers and applause ] and we have a performance from kings of leon thats tomorrow night. Steve oh [ cheers and applause ] jimmy then later this week, aziz ansari and james spader will be joining us. [ cheers and applause ] gonna be good. But first, we have a fun show tonight. I just love this guy. He stars in the new movie the founder. The great Michael Keaton is here, ladies and gentlemen steve yeah [ cheers and applause ] jimmy have you seen this yet . The founder . Steve yes. Fantastic. Jimmy its about ray kroc, the guy who well, he says hes the founder of mcdonalds, but its tricky tricky business. This movie is tricky, man. He is fantastic. And anyways, Michael Keaton is here and were gonna play a a brand new game called rhymeversation. Steve mmm. Jimmy that just rolls off the tongue. Steve rhymeversation. Jimmy like conversation. Steve but rhyme. Jimmy rhymeversation. Yeah. [ laughter ] rhymeversation. Steve rhymeversation. Jimmy yeah. Steve rhyme jimmy i mumble so bad. Rhymeversation. [ light laughter ] steve rhymeversation. Jimmy i played a game on ellen. I was on ellen two weeks ago, and we played a game called speak out or something. We had to stick this Plastic Thing in your in your lips. [ cheers ] steve uhhuh. Jimmy like that. And i actually talked better steve than you do normally . Jimmy with the thing in my mouth. [ laughter ] game wasnt fun at all. I was like, this is fantastic. I should just come out and host a show like that. Steve oh, hello. Jimmy plus, from the big new action movie, xxx return of xander cage, the lovely nina dobrev is dropping by. [ cheers and applause ] love her, too. And we have great music tonight. Everybody is talking about the xx, everybody [ cheers and applause ] steve yeah x. X. X. Jimmy am i holding it up . Am i holding the right ooh, look at that. Steve ooh, silver. Jimmy ooh. Steve no, glass. Jimmy clear, its clear. Steve is it seethrough . Jimmy seethrough. [ audience oohs ] steve ooh, spicy. Jimmy its spicy, yeah. Its a spicy beverage. [ light laughter ] what are they playing tonight . Theyre playing lips tonight. Thats their jam. You want a little taste of it . Steve yeah, bust me off a a piece. [ laughter ] in my head in my veins in the way you give and take and the way that you jimmy yeah, thats all you get right there. The xx is here tonight [ cheers and applause ] woo, doggy everyones talking about this album, man. Im psyched to have it on vinyl, too. Questlove, you jealous . Questlove i am. Jimmy yeah, i know. cause i got that vinyl. Hey guys, the nfl conference championship games are this sunday and the nfc matchup is between the Atlanta Falcons wow. [ laughter ] wow. And theyre playing against the green bay packers. [ cheers and applause ] well, as you know at the end of every season they give out awards. They give out awards at the end of every season. Steve do they really . Jimmy like most valuable player. Steve uhhuh. Jimmy but they also give out awards during the season. Steve i did not know this. Jimmy do you watch football . Steve no, not really, but i didnt know this. [ laughter ] jimmy no, well, if you watch football, you know everyone knows this. They give out awards during the season, sort of like the ones like in High School Yearbooks . Steve uhhuh. Jimmy like most likely to succeed. Steve sure. Jimmy class clown. Steve yeah. Jimmy stuff like that. Steve okay. Jimmy just like goofy, fun awards. Steve oh, that sounds fun. Jimmy just to keep the game fresh. Steve yeah. Freshen it up. Jimmy spice it up a little bit. Steve cheeseheads. Jimmy so with that in mind [ laughter ] sort of. With that in mind, its time for tonight show superlatives. Here we go. [ cheers and applause ] tonight show superlatives jimmy now, our first player is haha clintondix. [ laughter ] hes a safety for the green bay packers. He was voted most likely voted to have a brother named lol. [ laughter ] well, thats interesting. [ applause ] haha, lol . Come get dinner. [ light laughter ] haha, lol. Steve yeah. Not you, j. K. [ laughter ] jimmy j. K. , were not ready for your dinner yet. [ laughter ] j. K. All right. Heres brett goode. He was voted most likely to attend the inauguration just to see three doors down play. [ laughter and applause ] steve oh, wow jimmy the boys are back steve yeah one, two, three doors. Jimmy next up is kyle murphy. [ laughter ] he was voted most likely to spend a long time looking at a a math equation on a a chalkboard, then jus eats the chalk. Steve wow. [ laughter and applause ] [ chomping noises ] jimmy math make me hungry steve me hungry. [ light laughter ] he was looking at pi. Jimmy next up is from the falcons is matt bryant. [ light laughter ] he was voted most likely to be j. K. Simmonss mug shot. [ laughter ] there you go. J. K. , j. K haha haha, j. K. Steve come on. Jimmy lol. Steve get in here. Jimmy youre in trouble. Oh, you are here. Steve j. K. [ light laughter ] jimmy heres datone jones. He was voted most likely to have a Voicemail Message that says, leave a message for datone after da tone. [ laughter and applause ] gotta do it. Steve how could he not . Hes gotta do it. Jimmy if not if he doesnt, he should now. Steve yeah, he should do it right now. Jimmy if he doesnt, he should now. Exactly. Steve after da tone. Jimmy next from the packers is don barclay. He was voted most likely to be Bradley Cooper preparing for a a role as kevin james. [ laughter ] steve wow. Jimmy interesting. [ applause ] thats interesting. I see that. Steve both excellent actors. Jimmy i see that. Next up is mason crosby. He was voted most likely to do the tango in a cialis commercial. [ laughter and applause ] whats this commercial about . Steve in the bathtub. Jimmy finally from the falcons is quarterback matt ryan. He was voted most likely to be waldo without the hat and glasses. [ laughter and applause ] wait a second. Can we wait a second can we see him with the outfit . Hey, not bad [ applause ] thats pretty good. There you go, guys. Those are your nfl superlatives. Well be right back with Michael Keaton, ladies and gentlemen [ cheers and applause ] the microsoft cloud helps us stay connected. The microsoft cloud offers infinite scalability. The microsoft cloud helps our customers get up and running, anywhere in the planet. Wherever theres a phone, youve got a bank, and we could never do that before. The cloud gave us a single platform to reach across our entire organization. It helps us communicate better. 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[ cheers and applause ] jimmy our first guest is an Academy Award nominated actor who stars in the new movie the founder, which is in select theaters now and opens everywhere on friday. Go check it out. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the one and only Michael Keaton [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats how you make an entrance right there you bet. Jimmy that is how you do it, right there, my friend. You bet. Jimmy nice to see you. Thanks. Can i Say Something before we start . Jimmy yeah, of course. Or have we started . Jimmy wha yeah, weve kinda started. Yeah. Oh, okay good. I wasnt sure if we started yet. That thing was so funny with all of those nfl guys, and haha was the one guy the one dudes name. Haha. And his brother lol . Jimmy yeah. Alright, i have to tell you this, i dont have a i have a meager presence, you know, in social media. But, but you know, i do email my my pals or friends of mine. I email all the time because if you do business, or you text your pals, like adam mckay, for instance. Jimmy whos great. And hysterical. Jimmy oh, hes one of the funniest dudes ever. So this is kind of embarrassing. My kid loves to make fun of me. For the longest time, i thought i swear to god, this is true. I didnt know what lol was. I thought lol was lots of luck. [ laughter ] i swear to god. And so you know, you like, text somebody like and you go, this is kind of funny. You know . A friend. And they go lol, and youd think lots of luck . [ laughter ] jimmy no. Its kind of like blowing me off . Like, yeah, lots of luck. Jimmy yeah, its like like oh, congrats on that award, lol. Yeah. [ laughter ] jimmy i heard you got nominated for an Academy Award, lol. Lol. Yeah. Jimmy no, i meant lots of luck [ laughter ] yes. Jimmy oh, thatll get you in trouble, man. That will get you in trouble. I want to talk about some early standup days. cause i know you did you started in standup. Yeah, mostly. I mean, i was kind of doing both. You know, i was coming up to new york to im going to move here, and you know, try to act, but i was doing a lot of standup at the same time. Jimmy well, what do you remember where you played . What what clubs or . Well, in in pittsburgh i played some places where i shouldnt have been playing. Jimmy right. cause they didnt they didnt you know, you just walk out. Nobody would announce you or anything. [ light laughter ] jimmy yeah, i had to oh, its horrible. Its just horrible. Jimmy oh, i know those gigs. No one expects comedians to be there at all. Like, whats going on . [ light laughter ] ive done those gigs. My dad would drive me to gigs theyd i remember there was one where i had a microphone, and the wire was connected to a, like a stereo, like a boom box stereo with play record was pushed. Yeah. Jimmy down taped down so that that you could use that as the p. A. Oh, thats so great. Jimmy and it was just like and no one wanted me there and this is true. I played two places or i didnt play. Just kind of showed up. Didnt even have microphones. Im not lying. No microphone. You just kind of talked. You talked to people. And just [ light laughter ] its so humiliating and horrible. Jimmy and so personal. Its horrible. Jimmy yeah. One time well i for a while, you know, when youre trying to find what your thing is. And it can take you a year to build five minutes sometimes. Maybe not that long, but it can take you a long ass time. Jimmy almost took me four years to get no, no thats not true. Jimmy 15 seconds, yeah. [ light laughter ] what was your what was your well the thing was, you know, so youre finding stuff. And actually, i should have stuck with what i was doing. cause i was doing pretty well, but i thought, i dont know. Maybe im maybe im wacky . You know . [ light laughter ] maybe im maybe im a wacky guy . Jimmy oh, my gosh. [ light laughter ] you know, ill be wacky. And so, hey, props wacky guys use props, and only steve martin, at that time, was really great with props. Jimmy oh, yeah. He just crushed. He was Jimmy Steve Martin is unbelievable. He was the inventor of the i saw him live once. It was one of the greatest things when he was just getting started. One of the greatest things ive ever seen. So i thought, yeah, i want to try that. And i know cause we talked about this one time. The problem with that there are a lot of problems with it. The problem with it, when you die and if youre not that wacky guy jimmy yep. Youre going to die. Jimmy yep, exactly. [ light laughter ] i know where youre going to go, yeah. Its not just like, you know, if youre like you kind of die, you kind of go, good night, everybody and you just leave. Jimmy yeah. No. You have to stay jimmy get the props. Jimmy good night, everybody. And then youre there like 10 minutes every [ laughter ] jimmy this is my like, can you hand me that . Can you hand me that skull . Thank you. Right there. Id go im sorry. Exactly. [ laughter ] jimmy and youre sweating. Exactly. Jimmy what was your props . It was the rubber chicken, its in the back. [ light laughter ] jimmy you had to use a a rubber chicken . Yeah, it was some dumb thing i do, with a rubber chicken, but its humiliating. But its really horrible when you i mean, theres and theres nothing greater when it works. Right . Theres nothing jimmy and thats why i i do this every night. Oh, man. Jimmy when you get a good laugh in the monologue, or anything plus, youre great, man. You just kill it. Jimmy please, no. Oh, my god. Yeah, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy im telling you, i i you know, i love you and everything you do, but i mean, i really mean it. The founder blew me away. Yeah, its good. Jimmy what a juicy role and, man ray kroc heres what i know, growing up, of course and still now, i eat mcdonalds. And i know over a billion served or something. Yeah, but i always go, oh, yeah. Ray kroc is the guy that founded mcdonalds, not thinking that, of course there was mcdonald, the family. You did think that . I never thought that. Jimmy no, i never thought it. I always thought, ray kroc. Great. Jimmy but, of course, it has to be. There were two brothers named dick and mac mcdonald . Yes, right. And they and i had no clue. I had nothing, i had no idea. You know, i did exactly i thought exactly what you thought. You think you know the story of ray kroc, and then realize, i dont know anything about this. I didnt know there were brothers, i didnt know where it started. Those two guys, by the way, they created something that was kind of mindblowing, but to his credit, you know, kroc saw it. He says, i see i know exactly where this is going to go. I know exactly what i can do with this. So, i think he probably yes. He franchised. Well, they actually tried to franchise a little bit, but it went bust. Jimmy yeah, well you well you start the thing as a a traveling salesman and your like and you have your spiel all down, like, hey, how many milkshakes do you want make . Well, you ever try to make five milkshakes . Well, with this new mixer. Blah, blah, blah. And nobody wants yeah. Its this type, yeah. Jimmy oh, its beautiful. Its well shot. Yeah, he was kind of on a a downhill slide during that period. But he had he had his ups and downs. Jimmy but then you meet these mcdonald brothers, and you go, and you see, why why is there a line to get into this place . Yeah. Jimmy its fascinating to watch how business grows. And their like, we just cut out we dont do biscuits anymore, and chicken. Now we just do all we do is burgers fries and shakes. Yeah, i know. And it changed culture, really. Changed the way, you know, not only the way you eat, but the way the kind of the way you live. You know, were a disposable society. Where, you know, everythings portable. I mean, it really changed the way we do everything. Jimmy that scene was fantastic. You going up to the thing, you were like, right, but i just ordered this. And they go, thats fast food. Its done. Yeah. Jimmy wait, but i just ordered this. Right, right. Right, what do i do with this . Jimmy where where are the utensils . You dont use utensils, you eat it out of the bag. Yeah, yeah. Jimmy its just paper. And he goes, right, and where do i eat it . He goes, eat it in your car, eat it in your house, i mean, i dont care. You can take it home. Whatever you want to do, man. And it that blew his mind. Jimmy and its like shaking like what. This is the future. But i guess thats how you react when you first you know, another scene that you cause we were talking about this earlier, and youre one of the few people that pointed out, that whole thing and this is true. He would listen to selfhelp recordings. Jimmy records i didnt know they had those. Yeah, i know. Jimmy its really great. He kind of persistence, persistence. Jimmy i know, its great. Yes. Jimmy i was like, oh, hes just sitting, hes zoned out. And getting in in the head of how can i be a successful business guy. But then, what you see him do its so it kind of when he turns to me. When he goes south. Jimmy it felt like i got punched in the stomach. Yeah, yeah. You got to go see it. But i mean, the poor mcdonald brothers. Yeah. Jimmy theyre not poor, i mean. Theres a but kind of. [ laughter ] yeah. Well, its kind of great. You know, john lee took and said, no, this is this is the movie were going to make. And i said, you know, if you kind of want to sugar coat this, or make him kind of a kind of a semilovable guy toward the end, i said, theres 9 zillion guys who can do that way better than i can, its not interesting. He didnt want to do it, and i didnt want to do it that way. And you know it definitely jimmy only you could pull this off. Awe, thanks man. Jimmy i go dude, i loved you, im rooting for you, and then you dude, like gross. By the end. And i go, guys, i dont know why i still love this guy. But i hate him, and its Michael Keaton. Of course, thats why i love him. So a friend of mine tells me he takes his 18yearold daughter to see this movie, and shes sitting there, and shes watching it. Shes really locked into it, really, really locked into it. And he leans over and goes, what do you think . And she goes like this, she goes, this guys a dick. [ laughter ] jimmy its unbelievable its a transformation in what you do. Thank you. Jimmy i love you so much. I want to show a clip. Heres Michael Keaton, Nick Offerman, and John Carroll Lynch gosh, hes fantastic as well, in the founder. Take a look at this. Its a building, with a a cross on top. What is that . Gathering place where decent, wholesome people come together and they they share values, protected by that american flag. It could be said that, that beautiful building flanked by those arches signifies more or less the same thing. It doesnt just say, delicious hamburgers inside. It signifies family, it signifies community, its a a place where americans come together to break bread. I am telling you mcdonalds can be the new american church. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy the founder the founder opens everywhere on friday. More with Michael Keaton when we get back. [ cheers and applause ] i introduce her as queen gail because she is the queen of the store hi gail how are you . We should probably call her vig very important gail. When gail needs a little pick me up in the afternoon, she gets a flat white. Gails not messing around with that flat white. She wants it to be perfect every single time. But i will say that it was perfect, she was like mmm, this is so good. You know its something that takes just the right amount of sass to make. Gail wouldnt know anything about that though. [laughter] state farm knows that for every one of those moments. What . Theres one of these. Sam, i gotta go. Is this my car . This is ridiculous this is ridiculous from car insurance. To car loans. State farm is here to help life go right. Un poquito mas rapido, no . [instrumental music plays] [wheel squeaking] hasta luego, profesor [pumping of bike tire] [pumping of hospital ventilator] [wheel squeaking] Carlos Carlos dr. Brad needs to see you in room 3. [wheel squeaking] [heart monitor beeping] tell cardio right away i need a. Goodnessknows invited people who have always wanted to create a jingle, to try. Full disclosure everybody, i am not a good singer. singing goodnessknows, goodnessknows, so much flavor i can feel it in my toes every try is a step to being your best. singing try a little goodness. So, how much longer do you think this will take . Ill overexplain the process, then give you an unrealistic timeline. Ill nod in agreement so my wife thinks i understand what youre saying. I look forward to questioning your every move. Okay, well ill leave your house in shambles and disappear for six months. Wouldnt it be great if everyone said what they meant . The citi® double cash card does. It lets you earn double cash back 1 when you buy, and 1 as you pay. The citi double cash card. Double means double. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you make me so happy. I love this. Welcome back. Were here with Michael Keaton, everybody. Thats right [ cheers and applause ] what a performance. What a movie. The movie the founder. You gotta go check it out everywhere on friday. We already talked about the founder. But theres still a few more things i wanted to talk about. And to make things a bit more interesting. More interesting than what we just did . Jimmy yeah. Really . Jimmy i thought, instead of having a conversation [ light laughter ] wait for it. We could have a rhymeversation. Thats right. Its time for tonight show rhymeversation. Here we go. [ cheers and applause ] tonight show rhymeversation oh, yeah. Jimmy now heres how it works. Yeah, thats better. Jimmy yeah. Well be given a word. Okay . And were gonna have to try to have a natural sounding conversation where the last word of every sentence rhymes with the word that were given. So if we were given the word founder, i might say tell me about your movie the founder and you might say i might say its about the guy who sold you a quarter pounder. Jimmy yeah. Thats exactly right. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, yeah. Jimmy thats great. And if we get stuck on a word, were gonna hear this sound. [ buzzer ] and then well get a new word to rhyme with. Here we go. Yeah. Jimmy ill start us off. [ imitating buzzer ] means bad. Jimmy it means bad, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, were trying something new on the tonight show. It doesnt mean like i run through a labyrinth to get a a piece of bread, does it . Jimmy no, no. Ring the bell, exactly. Ive got to say, man, i love your slacks. Oh, thanks, man, thanks. Usually you know, if you dont wear these right you can look like a hack. Jimmy yeah, yeah. I mean, did you get them are those jacks . I got em at saks. [ laughter and applause ] [ buzzing ] jimmy no, i didnt say anything what . Jeez. Quick on that buzzer. These judges are rough. Jimmy yeah, yeah. I mean, you know what . I saw this movie and i go you know, i want to celebrate. I was going to bring out a a cake. Uhhuh. [ laughter ] one that you would have [ laughter ] had your mom make. [ laughter ] jimmy no, no, no. Drake. [ light laughter ] oh. Yeah. Well, have you ever had hake . [ laughter ] jimmy that sounds fake [ cheers and applause ] it works jimmy yeah. Jimmy when i when i see a good film, sometimes i just sit back i just, i like to knit. [ laughter ] thats odd, because i like to think of you as a whit. [ light laughter ] jimmy i mean, your movie is a hit. Yeah, its so good. I mean, maybe you just ought to quit. [ laughter ] jimmy you think im a piece of [ laughter and applause ] [ buzzer ] sorry, sorry. I meant to say, like its very hip, because i eat quinoa, i eat [ laughter ] pomegranate seeds. I eat chewed bread. [ light laughter ] i eat, you know, bone broth. I eat kale. [ light laughter ] well good, because if you ate the way some people eat youd be as big as a whale. [ laughter ] jimmy and then i couldnt sail. [ light laughter ] right. Its a sad tale. [ laughter ] jimmy you know my friend dale . [ laughter ] im such a cheat. He just got out of jail . [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy did you get his email . [ laughter ] for shooting quail. Jimmy i mean i mean, i was like, aw hell. [ laughter ] [ buzzer ] all right. That was a close one. Okay. Jimmy happy that youre here tonight. Oh. I could say one mo night. [ laughter ] one mo night. Jimmy one mo night . Yeah. Jimmy oh, yeah, yeah. Sorry. Im sorry, i was thinking about your glasses. You use them for sight . [ laughter ] thats right. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] [ buzzer ] [ laughter ] jimmy okay. What . [ laughter ] the one thing i will say about your show i got it easy saying the first line. The one thing i will say about your movie the founder, it definitely was not unrealistic. [ laughter ] ah, no. In fact, its fun and elastic. Good night, everybody thank you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats it Michael Keaton, everybody [ cheers and applause ] come on. Theater bow. Theater bow. [ cheers and applause ] go see the founder in theaters this friday. Well be right back with nina dobrev, everybody [ cheers and applause ] [beeping] the 2017 rav4 with Toyota Safety sense, standard. Toyota. Lets go places. tic tac rattle Something Big is here. Tic tac mixers. They change flavor while you eat them. sfx loud zooming sfx small tap try cherry cola and peach lemonade flavors. Tic tac. Go little. tic tac rattle youd see all the sickness ifyoure spreading. Ur cough, robitussin cf max severe soothes and delivers powerful relief of cough, sore throat, stuffy nose and fever. Robitussin cf max severe. Because its never just a cough. Remember 2007 . Smartphones . O m g ten years later, nothings really changed. Its time to snap out of it. Hello moto. Snap on a jbl speaker. Put a 70 screen on a wall. Get a 10x optical zoom. Get excited world. Hello moto. Moto is here. The moto z with motomods. Get 50 off on moto z droid. Heavy, labored breathing heavy, labored breathing coughing breathing through oxygen mask breathing through oxygen mask breathing through oxygen mask breathing through oxygen mask covered california. Its more than just health care. Its life care. You have to brave to8 hours of testingcation, in the 11 most crucial areas of management accounting. Only 50 will pass. Done. So if youre one of them, feel free to brag. Youve earned it. Oh yeah. I want that. Whos next . Im next. After her. After him. The cma certification. Youve got to earn it. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy that was so fun. Our next guest stars alongside vin diesel in the huge new action movie xxx return of xander cage which opens in theaters and imax 3d this friday. Please welcome the talented, the beautiful nina dobrev, ladies and gentlemen [ cheers and applause ] im so happy to see you. Jimmy havent seen you in a a while. Happy new year. Jimmy happy new year to you. You look gorgeous. Thank you for coming on the show. Thank you. Jimmy nina, i have to im concerned. What . Jimmy well, every time you come on the show you tell me some crazy youre very adventurous. Yes. Jimmy like you just dont like just going on normal vacations, just doing nothing. Not at all, no. Thats not fun. I like doing crazy things. Jumping out of planes, sky diving. Jimmy the last time like a a monkey bit you or something. Do you remember that . Yeah. Jimmy yeah, that was scary. Yeah. Jimmy i wouldnt even be in that situation. This time i saw that you went flyboarding . Am i saying that right . No . Yeah. I think its flyboarding. Jimmy flyboarding, yeah. Thats right. Jimmy and what is flyboarding . Flyboarding is like a wake board in the water connected to a tube that connects to a jet ski that then propels water, and then propels you in the air and you flail around and i had a blast. But it is kind of tricky and awkward, and you look weird. Jimmy so youre floating . Are you surfing on youre surfing in the air. Youre like flying and surfing and screaming, like a lot of things happening. Jimmy why would you do this . Because this is just it cant end well. Its fun jimmy no. I think thats dangerous and frightening. So you, basically youre on a a surfboard and some dude shoots water up in the air and you just start surfing on the water . [ light laughter ] not really on the water. Then youre like above the water. Its like youre walking above the water sort of like jimmy like a jet pack. Sort of like jimmy shooting water out of a jet pack. Yes. We have video footage, a clip of you doing this. Oh yeah. Jimmy and i want to show everybody, because this is pretty impressive. Heres nina dobrev flyboarding. Hanging out with my friend john. Morning news starts. And it starts right now. [ laughter ] jimmy wait a second. Thats not thats not wait a second. It didnt look anything like you thats not wait a second. No. Lets show the real video. No. This is the real jimmy sorry. I apologize. We have a new video guy. [ laughter ] frustrating. Heres nina, flyboarding. Here you go. And it starts right now [ laughter ] jimmy thats not nina. Hey, hey, gary [ cheers and applause ] gary, hey thats not nina heres the real [ laughter ] this is the real nina dobrev. Check it out. This is for real. Okay, really . Jimmy that is you. Look at this. Now, watch this. Its insane. Look at my arms, though. Im flailing. Jimmy look at that, though. Come on [ cheers and applause ] are you kidding me . Are you that how cool are you . Balancing is super awkward and tricky. Its a hard thing to do but it was fun. Jimmy thats fantastic. It was my first time. I loved it. Jimmy did you do this after the filming of xxx . Ah, yes. Jimmy you did . Are you into now stunts and action . Ive never seen you really you do that many stunts and action stuff. I know jimmy a little bit. I mean, i think we talked about it in the past that ive wanted to do action. Ive always wanted to be in an action movie. And i finally got to live that dream, except i played the nerdy tech girl. So theres that. Jimmy yeah, but you do have some fight scenes in there. No, but that was per my request. I begged the director. I was like please, do not have all of my friends go see this huge vin diesel action movie and im in the corner cowering, scared of everything. So i was like please, like give me a grenade, give me a gun, give me something. Jimmy give me a grenade. [ light laughter ] you can still cower in the corner with a grenade [ laughter ] i mean jimmy all you can do with a a grenade. Its not like, ah, grenade right. [ laughter ] jimmy you got to run away from a grenade. Im glad he talked you out of that. But they did. They gave me they gave me, we wrote the scene where he gave me a gun, and essentially they didnt give me like everyone else in the movie got training but i didnt get any. Jimmy oh no. So they were just like, all right. Heres a loaded gun. Good luck. Dont die. [ laughter ] jimmy no, no, thats not true at all, man. I mean, it wasnt loaded with bullets, like real bullets. But yeah. Jimmy vin diesel doesnt screw around. I mean, this is the third one in the xxx movies. Thats right. Jimmy ice cube is in it. And vin diesel. And then, so whats your characters name . Becky. Jimmy but you call yourself becky the techie. Shes a tech wizard. Jimmy yeah. [ light laughter ] youre fantastic in it. You were actually really funny in this, which is great, because i know you you shouldnt tell people that. You should tell them that im not funny and when they go see the movie, they will be pleasantly surprised. Jimmy got you. Yeah. [ light laughter ] jimmy you were so boring in this movie. [ laughter ] thank you oh my god, jimmy. Jimmy i was like, what is the deal . [ laughter ] come on. Jimmy yeah. Well, then theyll be pleasantly surprised. You know, come on, i love you. I want to show a clip. Heres nina dobrev, vin diesel, and Toni Collette oh, i love toni too shes the best. Jimmy in xxx return of xander cage. Take a look at this. Xander cage. This is crazy. I was at coachella and guns and roses got back together, but this is way cooler. Wait. Take your time. I know mouthtomouth, if necessary. Wow clearidge worked closely with gibbons. Shell handle support for the operation. And i bet a guy like you needs a lot of support. What are you, like, 220 . 230 . Be honest. 250 is like the hard max for my swing. Oh, come on. Im kidding. Its not like i have a safe word or anything. Its kumquat. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy kumquat. Nina dobrev, everybody go see xxx return of xander cage in theaters this friday. Kumquat. Well be right back with music from the xx. Stick around [ cheers and applause ] is depression more than sadness . Its a tangle of multiple symptoms. Trintellix vortioxetine is a prescription medicine for depression. Trintellix may start to untangle or help improve the multiple symptoms of depression. For me, trintellix made a difference. Tell your healthcare professional right away if your depression worsens, or you have unusual changes in mood, behavior or thoughts of suicide. Antidepressants can increase these in children, teens, and young adults. Trintellix has not been studied in children. Do not take with maois. Tell your healthcare professional about your medications, including migraine, psychiatric and depression medications to avoid a potentially lifethreatening condition. Increased risk of bleeding or bruising may occur especially if taken with nsaid pain relievers, aspirin, or blood thinners. Manic episodes or vision problems may occur in some people. May cause low sodium levels. The most common side effects are nausea, constipation and vomiting. Trintellix did not have Significant Impact on weight. Ask your healthcare professional if trintellix could make a difference for you. director what . You knowe your thats not your line, right . jon did you know that h r block will file your 1040ez for free . director ahhh. Yeah. The line is, rome. jon my jobs done here. director ok. Thank you. jon dont just get your taxes done. Get your taxes won. There are now twice as many fourdollar value menu items. Thats right, america. We just created the greatest value menu in the world. Boom. Give extra. Get extra. Whether youre after supreme performance. Advanced intelligence. Or breathtaking style. Theres a cclass just for you. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Lease the c300 sedan for 389 a month at your local mercedesbenz dealer. Mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. I bet you a buck hek catches this salt shaker. U. Youre on. Hey chuck you owe me a buck. You cant always see whats coming. But when you choose unitedhealthcare, finding an innetwork doctor is easy. Unitedhealthcare wiback like it could used to . Neutrogena hydro boost water gel. With hyaluronic acid it plumps skin cells with intense hydration and locks it in. For supple, hydrated skin. Hydro boost. From neutrogena i believe in me too. I am the unicorn of your confidence play marian hill. Are you down, dddown, dddown, dddown, down, down . Are you. Down, ddown, down, dddddown, down, down, down . Down, ddown, down, down, dddddown, down, down, down . Are you down, are you down, are you dddown, are you . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh, everybody is talking about their new album i see you. It just debuted at number one on itunes, and theyre going to kicking off the u. S. Leg of their world tour in april. Performing lips, give it up for the xx [ cheers and applause ] just your love just your shadow just your voice and my soul just your love just your shadow just your voice and my soul just your lips my name on your lips youre wearing my lungs drowned in oxygen now youve set the scene high on intimacy drawing me a bath i dont wanna know the way down i dont wanna know the way down i just want your love i just want it all in my head in my veins in the way you give and take in the way that you weigh on my body on my brain chemistry is wrecking a two three time affair theres no guarantees working through the seasons pressed up against the ceiling pushing down on me i dont wanna know the way down i dont wanna know the way down i just want it all i just want it all in my head in my veins in the way you give and take in the way that you weigh on my body on my brain i dont wanna know the way down [ cheers and applause ] jimmy come on, i see you. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. The xx thank you, pal. I see you is out now well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] what you gone do . Lift up your head and keep moving or let the paranoia haunt you . Everybody lack confidence, everybody lack confidence i keep my feefifofum i keep my heart undone the strong in me, i still smile. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy my thanks to Michael Keaton nina dobrev the xx, everybody [ cheers and applause ] and the roots, right there, from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thank you for watching. Have great night. I hope to see you tomorrow. Byebye thank you [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers tonight, aidy bryant. From a series of unfortunate events, actor, patrick warburton. Music from bibi bourelly. Featuring the 8g band with leah shapiro. Ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers [ cheers and applause ] seth good evening, im seth meyers, this is late night. How is everyone doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] fantastic. Great to hear. In that case lets get to the news. Donald trump will be sworn in as president this friday at 12 00 noon. Thats when the big hand is on the 12, and the little hand is on the bible. [ laughter and applause ]

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