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March 3, 2014
>> why dont you take a picture. it will last longer. >> the number 3 trender, selfie destruction. >> so i thought we would break another record right now with the most retweets of a photo. bradley, we want you in it. [ music playing ] >> looking at us. >> ellens selfie wins best picture and crashes twitter. >> we crashed and broke 26th. we have made history. >> its broken. >> we are all winners tonight. thats what it means. >> i am a winner. >> hashtag oscars, hashtag blessed. >> next my selfie ...
March 3, 2014
>> how many people can get stoned and still have a great state or a great nation? >> you are kind of a buzz kill. >> its not 24 hours a day, more than some of the potheads might be able to put together. >> and todays top trender. cutting remarks. >> its the first budget in 12 years. >> its not a budget based on war footing. you reset your whole enterprise based on the new realities. >> conservatives put up a fight over defense cuts. >> what were trying to do is solve our financial problems on th...
January 11, 2014
Amazing moment for americans, you know, they feel so much patriotism for their country. why does obama got to go and ruin us and show us a commercial for obamacare reminding us we have obamacare. thats a buzz kill. >> can you imagine downhill skiing, you get the guy, the pajama boy in the onesie. can we show the full screen. look what we put together. in the meantime, while we do this. >> when mcdonalds buys an ad they do with it private money to promote a product that you have a choice in buyin...
January 7, 2014
Your new years resolutions. weather conditions suck. the debt levels are high and too many days have passed since the holidays. unfortunately, its worse than that. >> i was having a great day, i got robbed on the way here. >> oh, no. >> somebody punched me in the face. maybe you can pan and see this, and stole my iphone. >> mayor de blasio is under criticism for the crime. >> i miss you. >> are you okay? >> i was having a great day, and then this happened. so it is the most depressing day of the...
December 20, 2013
Just to prove it it, he actually took the picture with him and so she wouldnt think it was a hoax. she gave her this it cow which is going to be donated to a charity. he got her this book, which she actually loves. she actually signed up for these things and thats why he got her this. >> people are saying that hes cheap, but the cow is an expensive gift. >> it was on her registry. >> now she probably wish she is put diamonds and saving bonds. >> this is a bittersweet buzz pr me. this is my last ...
December 13, 2013
Were talking earlier. you have a big problem with adam levine selling obamacare. >> he is the sexiest man alive and obamacare is the biggest buzz kill. by the way, he is the guy who said i hate this country on an open mic, right? what i have a problem with is our tax dollars of course going toward this propaganda and i think they should have disclosures at the bottom of these ads saying they should pay the mandate tax. all of these celebrities. >> all should have to be in obamacare. they are not...
December 4, 2013
Rat on you. chick-fil-a has fruk toctose in their buns? >> not me. when i go out to dinner, i dont want to know how many calories i have consumed. in new york you see it all over the place because by law they have to post it. >> my receipt is going to look at long as the great lead now. what is next bicycle drive throughs? it is a buzz kill. i dont want to know the calories in my cheese doodles. >> just to give you a sense this receipt happened to say somebody had a regular coke it said next tim...
November 12, 2013
Utensils? >> the two groups getting together the swedes and the feminists. >> i used to go to the movies. they are the art house theaters. >> i will be watching -- bringing up baby in the philadelphia story. and then the college girls behind me would say something that wasnt politically correct. >> a womans place in the home. >> what are you doing? >> go back to harvard. >> that was me. >> they look like you but -- >> andy is one of our -- he is one of the few sphem nighses we have -- feminists ...
November 9, 2013
. thats very much in line with expectations. this is going to shave something like, oh, maybe three-tenths of a point off gdp growth. that may not send like a lot. but its billions of dollars. as you mentioned, the back pay is interesting. we have decided, and i think it was a good decision, to pay people for their furloughed work. so theyre going to get back pay for work they still to do now. thats a very unfortunate consequence of this quite foolish, politically eye dee logically political shu...
November 9, 2013
Verses. he would be freaked out by theld fourth verse and let me read ars little.tone then conquer we must when our cause it is just and this be our motto, in god is our trust. >> he hates that. >> he will lose his mind. the song represents american freedom from oppression. what is the problem? it doesnt glorify war. >> when you are on one of the talk shows and i think he had what aim going to say-itis. >> i bet he doesnt want to get a job with nbc news that covers the olympics. when you win a m...