Page 18 - Guy School News Today

I dont drink anymore. I had to quit because i really drank. Man i get pulled over my cops id be so drunk id be out dancing by lights thinking i made it to another club. In a way laughter is bizarrely intimate thing. Its such an uncontrolled physical response. Its very similar biologically to orgasm. If someone made you laugh even once you have an affection for that person. Its all love, baby. A comedian is like your friend. Thats what the job of a comedian is. To come on stage and in 60 seconds ...

Pocket. When you laugh, its a racial joke. When you dont laugh, its a racist joke. Just for the record, my arab friends, i dont do any arab jokes in my act. Not that youre not funny but, you know, i dont want to die. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Oh, wow. I did a festival in telluride, colorado. A ski town. Not a lot of minorities there. I was talking to this dude. He says, yo, man, before you go, i got to ask you one thing, where are you...

Military drills conducted by the united states and south korea. bad guys beware. kindergarten cops are on this case. police in connecticut releasing these sketches from a 6, 7, and 8-year-old. the kids play ground when a man smashed his motorcycle while doing tricks. the driver took off when the cops came. those kids got right to work and brought the police these sketches. at last check the guy is still on the run. but, thats some good kids there. >> steve: you are a former police officer would ...

>> in general terms about the future of this candidate, in my mind he is incredibly selfish. he thinks becoming a politician is more important than the respect of his family or the belief of the people voting. it is about him, right? >> i am not going to pick on new york right now, but if new york elects this guy mayor -- i am looking in the camera. you get what you ask forment thats it. ask for. thats it. he is the guy in high school who probably couldnt get any action. so now here he is. you s...

Stores on apple iphones. >> heres the funny thing. the the idea that blocking traffic, people trying get to home after a long day of work, at the tumor the bridge, is going to -- that is the dale carn anything guy school of getting people on your side. its ridiculous. >> that has been the long history of protests in this country to bow disruptive. >> but going inside of someones business, inside a macys or apple store. i dont get it except people who love to link the idea of america -- the excep...