Page 8 - Jen Carson News Today

Yeah. when my father was given a parole hearing, it just spun me out. i was frightened, you know. i felt unsafe. >> to keep the carsons behind bars, jen has connected online with each of the victims families, to fight their parole. and today shes meeting the family of the carsons last victim in person for the very first time. >> john offered a ride to my father and susan and susan stabbed him repeatedly, and then my father shot him. >> why do you want to meet the family members of the people you...

Mom gave me this life changing news. >> do you remember what your mom said to you that day? >> yeah. i remember every second of that moment. she said, i told you that daddy was really sick and thats why he couldnt see you anymore. and daddy got more sick and he hurt a bunch of people. then i looked up and i said, are the hurt people dead? she said, yes, and thats when she started crying. >> thats the day your life changed forever? >> yeah. >> during the years jen and her mom were in hiding, jens...

Shame and sadness i felt for these victims and this fear that i was doomed. >> when did you stop feeling that way? >> i dont think that has stopped. >> jens life was forever changed by the actions of her father. im about to meet another whose world was also turned upside down by a man who became one of the first jihadi terrorists in america. >> i had been dealing with my fathers legacy for such a long time. i grew up and i realized that my mind had been poisoned. ♪ ♪

The fear that i would grow up to hurt people as you did, i hold no hatred or anger towards you, only hurt and sorrow for the lives that were lost. >> did you ever give that to him? >> no. >> you dont think jim is in there anymore? >> no. hes this guy now. >> this was incredibly difficult to deal with 30 years ago and it will be difficult to deal with tomorrow, but i no longer hide. i know longer keep it a secret. >> today, jen is very open about the struggles in her life. she inherited her fathe...

♪ you want it touched up a little bit? go ahead and look at me. >> this is jen carson. at 43 years old, jen has returned home to care for her mother, with whom she share as close bond and a dark history. >> the reason i was helping clean out my moms house and i found a bunch of girl scout patches, and i also found some pictures. >> jens childhood started out like many others, with a mom and dad who loved her. >> those are my parents, jim and lynn. thats me. my mom was teaching and father sta...

The last time jen saw her father was the one time she visited him in prison more than 20 years ago. at the time, he showed no remorse, and today she refuses to speak with him. for years, jen thought the carsons would never get out. but in 2014, a new california state program allowed elderly inmates the possibility of parole. in 2015, michael and susan received hearings. susan was denied and michael will be seeing the board again in 2020. >> do you believe that over 60 years old, your father is s...

Depression, school failure, substance abuse. and you know what? im really open. i am mentally ill. i have a mental illness, everybody. is that scaring you? it shouldnt. when we get to a place where we can talk about that, like other people talk about their diabetes, then we can move forward, because you know what? i am not ashamed of being mentally ill. i didnt put that stigma on that, somebody else put that stigma on me. >> todays crowd is somewhat unique. while some have gathered out of pure...

I was living this horrible existence, and he was going dom save me. >> and you still loved him? >> and i still loved him. yeah. >> so, jen, where are we going now? >> were headed to my old elementary school. this is where i was a fourth grader when my mother came and told me about his arrest of crimes. >> when was the last time you were here? >> 35 years. i have just avoided coming over here because it is completely intertwined in the worst day of my life. >> okay. >> how does it feel to be here...

And that the implications of our beliefs matter, and understanding them matter. >> ladies and gentlemen, heres zach ibrahim. [ applause ] >> thank you. >> this is model united nations. thousands of high school students from all over the world have gathered here to learn how to become future leaders, and now zach has their full attention. >> i was 7 years old when my father went to prison, and there is not a day that goes by that i had wish he had chosen a peaceful path. instead, he exposed me fr...

Very, very different, but strangely enough, they are very similar. theyre both very protective of their mothers, and theyre both very passionate about their mission. in many ways, their childhoods and adult lives have been defined by what their fathers have done, but they have chosen to spread messages of life, and not death. being a child of a killer is a silent burden, but jen and zach are no longer hiding. >> in the past i was trying to atone for my fathers crimes. and now i know i cannot bri...