Kiss Program News Today

[cheers and applause] jon hey come on [cheers and applause] show time welcome to the daily show my name is jon stewart. We have a fabulous show for you tonight. You know what im not going to do tonight . Im not going to overthink it, honestly, im just going to come out here like pacino at the oscars, mumble a few words, eventually youll figure out what i was getting at. Its fine the big event we need to talk about is the oscars of politics the state of the union address. Last thursday night. Jos...

Good morning. Morning. [beep] your morning could use a hand. Taco bells steak and egg a. M. Crunchwrap with a hash brown inside. A whole breakfast in one hand. [bong] look, i am telling you that you are making a huge mistake. Eric cartman is the nsas worst nightmare. Not according to the central computer. The central computer is wrong. You need to change his status. Sorry, but if central computer says hes not a threat, then we cant do anything. Cant do anything . Youre the nsa. Theres 300 Millio...

San jose to tell us why the teacher had contact with a number of students in a number of cities, robert . Reporter it has been a long tough day for the district informing parents and as the word spread the fear grows. Reporter tracing the steps has the Andrew Hill High School busy today. He was arrested by police for distributing child pornography. The youngest ones were four years old, up to nine. 57 years old. These are sexual acts. There is no evidence he produced his own child pornography. H...

"Surely, we are capable of changing when the stakes are so high and the consequences of failure so dire. And make no mistake: the stakes are high."