Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20171209 : vimarsana.c

KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live December 9, 2017

Special guest host chris pratt. Tonight Margot Robbie, and Chris Stapleton. And now, heres chris pratt [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] chris thank you. Woo whats up . Hey. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much. Whats up, guys . Welcome to Jimmy Kimmel Live. Im your guest host for the night, chris pratt. [ cheers and applause ] you know, i was actually i was kind of nervous to do this tonight. You know. Ive never done anything like this. But everybody here was so nice, they said, come on, chris, just give it the old college try. [ laughter ] which for me, i mean, means dont do it . [ laughter ] anyways, i said yes. And for me, it was an easy decision. I said, jimmy, brother, ill do anything for you as long as i can promote my upcoming film Jurassic World fallen kingdom, june 27th. [ cheers and applause ] he and i are very close. The movie is awesome, by the way. What i love about these movies in all seriousness, it answers some of the most compelling questions about science and imagination. Like, for instance, can a velociraptor bite a kids leg off . [ laughter ] the answer to that yes, it can. [ laughter ] and later on im going to show you a teaser for the official teaser trailer that comes out on thursday. Yes. I just teased a teaser. [ laughter ] for a teaser. [ laughter ] in hollywood, thats a Little Something we like to call selling out. [ laughter ] you know [ laughter ] there have been some other guest hosts and the way they prepare, they like to do Something Like staying up all night working on the monologue. They do a bunch of research on their guests. Thats not what i did. What i did last night, i flew to seattle and got hammered at a seahawks game. [ cheers and applause ] there is the actor chris pratt. Native of seattle. Raising the flag. And that always gets a tremendous response. Theyve been doing this for years here in seattle. Chris oh, that was so great. I mean, there was 70,000 people. All i know is the seahawks won by 14 points, and its all because of me. So youre welcome, seattle. [ cheers and applause ] i want everyone here to feel safe tonight. You are in the presence of both a guardian of the galaxy and a security guardian of the galaxy, guillermo. Guillermo hi, how are you, chris . [ cheers and applause ] chris you know, guillermo, so nice to have a sidekick that isnt a cgi raccoon. [ laughter ] or is he . [ laughter ] [ laughter ] this is actually a real thing. You may not know this, but guillermo costarred with me in guardians of the galaxy volume 2. Guillermo thats right. Chris shall we show them the clip . Guillermo no, no, i dont think we have time. [ laughter ] chris roll the clip. I need you to look closely. Right here. [ laughter and applause ] guillermo thats me. Thats right. [ cheers and applause ] chris that was actually you. Guillermo yes, thats right. That was me. Chris have you gotten more work because of that . Has it like snowballed into more jobs . Guillermo yeah, they asked me to do Perfect Pitch 4. [ laughter ] chris Perfect Pitch 4 . Guillermo yeah. Chris i cant wait to see that movie. Thats going be great. I have seen you all over the place. You were one of the special guests at a holiday parade in mccowan, texas, over the weekend. Do we have time to see the clip . Guillermo i dont think so. Keep working the monologue. Chris lets roll the clip. Jimmy kimmels very own Guillermo Rodriguez returning again here in 2015. Now hes back. Theyre very excited. The city commissioner veronica whitaker. You can tell theyre standing inside a giant ornament. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] chris have they started calling your cage an ornament . [ laughter ] guillermo i guess so. Chris i think thats really cool, man, congrats. Thats really great. We have a great show for you tonight. I dont know. It might suck. I dont give a [ bleep ]. Ive never done this before. Margot robbie is here. Thats cool. Im looking forward to sitting down, talking to her. Were going to discuss all the challenges we face being born blond and beautiful. [ laughter ] and, ooh, the great Chris Stapleton is in the house. [ cheers and applause ] chris is nominated for three grammys this year. You know, its just for me, its inspirational to see a guy with a huge beard and a cowboy hat finally make it in Country Music. [ laughter ] back in october, this is true, i was able to sing a duet with chris at one of his concerts in nashville. It was really fun. So tonight chris and i thought maybe we could sing a Little Something for you guys. [ cheers and applause ] chris, come on out here. [ cheers and applause ] how are you doing . Woo. We didnt actually have any time to rehearse this this afternoon. So were going to do something called leave things up to chance. [ laughter ] a game of chance, if you will. Its the wheel of cheesy duets. [ cheers and applause ] okay, okay. So the way this works is guillermos going to spin this wheel. Whatever cheesy duet it lands on, no matter what, chris and i have to sing that song. Weve got, opposites attract, dont know much but i know i love you. You dont bring me flowers. Ive had the time of my life. Somewhere out there. A whole new world. [ laughter ] right . [ applause ] okay. So on the count of three, guillermo, spin that wheel. One, two, three, spin it. [ cheers and applause ] you ready for this . Lets do it. Chris check, check. Oh. Now ive had the time of my life i never felt like this before yes i swear its the truth and i owe it all to you cause i had the time of my life [ cheers and applause ] and i owe it all to you [ cheers and applause ] chris ooh. Ive been waiting for so long now i finally found someone to stand by me we saw the writing on the wall and we felt this magical fantasy now with passion in our eyes theres no way we can disguise secretly so we take each others hands because we seem to understand the urgency just remember youre the one thing i cant get enough of so i tell you something this could be love because ive had the time of my life i never felt this way before never felt this way because i swear its the truth and i owe it all to you lets do the lift. Chris the lift . Lets do it, man. Come on, do it. Chris i cant. What . One more time. I am jennifer grey. Lets do it. One more time. We got this. [ cheers and applause ] chris thank you, chris. Woo we have to take a break. But when we come back, i will show you a never before seen clip from Jurassic World fallen kingdom. So stick around. [ cheers and applause ] hey ramirez un poquito mas rapido, no . 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I have a sneak peek of that trailer. Here is my costar best friend, bryce dallas howard. [ cheers and applause ] one more time for bryce, huh . [ cheers and applause ] im hosting the Jimmy Kimmel Live show. Yeah, thats a big deal. Chris i can do whatever i want tonight. Its my show. Isnt that great . Before we show the teaser, why dont we open up questions to the audience. Anyone have questions about us making the movie . How about that guy right there . Hi, what did you two like most about the new Jurassic World movie . Oh, well, well, i love the way the movie asked difficult questions about humanitys increasing ability to manipulate and control nature and the complexities involved in harnessing that power. [ cheers and applause ] chris i love the awesome dinosaurs. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] next . How about you . Hi. What were the obstacles or challenges that you faced while you were making the film . Oh, well, i mean, for me, probably, i mean playing my character, claire. She navigates the conflict between morality, apathy and personal responsibility with courage and compassion. I really [ laughter ] and you know what she stands for. [ cheers and applause ] chris i guess in terms of for me in terms of like challenges, more so id say is because the dinosaurs not real. [ laughter ] and because when you go there, you think, are they real . Then theyre not real. Youre like, oh, this is kind of a challenge that theyre not there. Anyway. Him . What was it like working with each other . Chris okay. Well, okay. Im going to take this. Im going to take this. So working with chris is always an opportunity for me to break free of the constraints of the scripted page and really tap into that exhilarating improvisational energy that he truly brings to everything. [ laughter ] chris bryce is awesome. [ laughter ] bryce is but like to be more, to be more bryce is shes like shes cool. [ cheers and applause ] right . Im an idiot. I suck at this. How did you get all the fancy words. Youre so good at this. You are so smart. I come off as a doof. If its not written down i sound like a moron. It is true chris, were just talking here. Theyre asking questions and were answering. People dont expect you to be some sort of elocutionist. [ laughter ] its someone who talks good. Oh whatever. Everyone just wants you to be you. Right, guys . [ cheers and applause ] chris okay. All right. Well, i feel better. You are the better executionist. Why dont we elocution. Chris you set up the clip then. Sure. So everyone, this is a clip that shows the tenuous relationship between homo sapiens and prehistoric beasts. Chris its also dope. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] its dope as [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] this is going to be awesome. [ cheers and applause ] chris watch the full trailer on thursday. 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[mel torme sings comin home baby] hey there. Want a lift . Where are we going . No dont tell me. Let me guess. Have a nice ride. How far would you go for coffee thats a cup above . I brought you nespresso. Nespresso. What else . But this guy is in a hurry. This van is going, uh, i was in a hurry this morning. Barely had time for breakfast. Growl. Grumpy jacks gonna crash your crave hey guys. Try my country scrambler plate, with jimmy dean sausage, homestyle potatoes and scrambled eggs mixed with bacon, ham and cheese. Careful out there, jack, i heard theres some crazy driver in a van. laughing its him im talking about him try my brunchfast country scrambler plate with jimmy dean sausage. Crave van chris welcome back. I am your guest host chris pratt. But dont think of me as a guest host. Think of me as a reminder that starlord toys are now on sale at your local retailers. [ laughter ] they make great stocking stuffers. [ laughter ] tonight on the show, hes a great musician as well as a hell of a good guy. This album [ cheers and applause ] yes. His album is called from a room, volume 2, Chris Stapleton from the mercedesbenz outdoor stage. [ cheers and applause ] before we go any further, i want to share some great news with you guys. Jimmys son, billy, had a successful heart surgery this morning. [ cheers and applause ] hes doing great. Hes doing great. And jimmy, molly, jane and billy, were thinking of you guys. Were sending you our love, our prayers, lots of both tonight. While jimmy is out with his family this week, hes got friends to cover for him. Tracee ellis ross will be here tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ] Neil Patrick Harris will host on wednesday. [ cheers and applause ] and on thursday, the great Melissa Mccarthy will sit behind this desk. [ cheers and applause ] set your vcrs for those. Our first guest tonight is the hottest australian import since the bloomin onion. [ laughter ] starting friday, she stars as the infamous olympian Tonya Harding in i, tonya. Please welcome the very talented Margot Robbie. [ cheers and applause ] hi. Chris hello. This is a great show. Youre doing such a great job. Chris i am . [ cheers and applause ] seriously. Chris thank you. I had a lot of fun with the monologue, but now lets get down to brass tacks. Kangaroos, did a donkey [ bleep ] a rabbit . [ laughter ] what up with it . They have a donkey face but a rabbit hop. I see what youre saying. I had no idea where that was going. I see, i see. I dont know, maybe. I hadnt thought about it. Chris weve got a conclusive maybe from the australian. You are from australia if you cant tell from the accent. When you see your work, people wouldnt know that because you do such a Great American accent. But you are australian. Where did you grow up . On the gulf coast but the hinterland part of gulf coast. Chris the hinterland . [ laughter ] that means i grew up on property, theres fields and chris ive been to i dont support like like i hate the stereotype. Like everyone thinks oh, youre from australia, theres creepy, crawly, poisonous, venomous things all over the place. But are there creepy, crawly, poisonous, venomous things all over the place . [ laughter ] kind of. Not something you concentrate on growing up. But yeah. Theres tons of poison i think theres a large percentage of the poisonous snakes in the world reside in australia, and spiders and sharks. Chris theres sharks and poisonous spiders and snakes. A lot of dangerous creatures growing up but its fine. When you live there you dont worry about it or think about it. Theyre there but didnt seem like a big deal. Chris ten of your closest friends growing up, how many of them were killed by poisonous spiders . [ laughter ] seven . No, i mean, i grew up on property and i dont even know someone i had snakes literally in my house growing up. Chris what . No, on purpose. They would get into the house or whatever. Chris what would be the biggest snake . Like a carpet python. If theyve got like a gold pattern on their back, theyre a carpet python and theyre fine. Sometimes if theyre little, often theyre probably more poisonous. So you get them out with a stick instead of picking them up. Chris a stick . Yeah. Jimmy you keep a stick, a poisonous snake removing stick . This one time, my mom came i was in my bratty teen years, and my mom came in and says, can you help me get the snake out of the house. I was like, mom, im really busy on msn, like no. And she was like, its a big one, though. Can you . I was like, so busy, mom, no. Then she went away and ten minutes later i was like, wheres mom . [ laughter ] chris oh, no. Thats when my mom got eaten. No, she didnt. [ laughter ] chris oh, my god. Terrified. After a while, she hasnt come back in the house. I went down and shes on the driveway. And this python was huge. It wrapped its way she tried to carry it out. It wrapped its way around her arm and

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