Theyre incredible. Ticktock, ticktock. Congratulations, donald. Well done. Ticktock, ticktock. Im lesley stahl. Im bill whitaker. Im like a smart guy. The clock is ticking its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight early bird and rudy is a worm. Plus, stephen welcomes Bruce Springsteen and eva longoria. Featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen yeah welcome to a late show. Im the Stephen Colbert. The 2020 election is less than two weeks away. Im so excited that im not getting any of the sleep i normally dont get. Tomorrow is the second and final president ial debate, for which we will be live, ladies and gentlemen, right there. Tune in to find out which Terrible Group trump wont condemn this time. as trump people who dont toss in for pizza because they say they dont want any but then have a slice when it comes, stand back and stand by. Guys who hover right behind you in line when using the urinal, await my orders. Neonazis, as you were. Every four years, around this time of the election, people start to worry about an october surprise. Today, we got more than an october surprised. We got october appalled, courtesy of trumps personal lawyer and man who has to constantly gnaw on tree trunks to keep his teeth from growing through his bottom lip, rudy giuliani. Giuliani appears in the new borat movie, starring sascha baron cohen, who will be my guest on the late show on monday. And it turns out we might have a lot to talk about, because today we learned that, thanks to hidden cameras, in the movie, we see giuliani reaching into his trousers and apparently touching his genitals while reclining on a bed in the presence of the actor playing borats daughter. Jeffrey toobin. Its over already. Dont worry, the teenage daughter was actually an actress whos 24. And you can still watch without having to see rudys tootie because the scene is quickly interrupted by borat, who runs in and says, shes 15. Shes too old for you. Never a great sign when the moral authority in a situation comes from a guy who once handed a woman a bag of his own poop. Even before cocktails in the bedroom, rudy acted like a real jerkoff. During the interview with the daughter giuliani drinks scotch, coughs, fails to socially distance, and agrees, at least in theory to eat a bat with his interviewer. Really, rudy . Eat a bat . What would that even look like . Yeah, okay. Now, this doesnt look great, but rudy says he has a perfectly innocent explanation. I had to take off the electronic equipment. And when the electronic equipment came off, some of it was in the back, and my shirt got a little out, came a little out. Although, my clothes were entirely on. I lean back, and i tuck my shirt in, and at that point, at that point, they have this picture they take, which looks doctored. But in any event, im tucking my shirt in. I assure you thats all i was doing. Stephen okay, i would buy that, but i watched the footage. Why did you go into a bedroom at the suggestion of a young woman to have cocktails to take off a mic. I take off a mic every night. Never once have i reclined on a kingsized bed and launched a Factfinding Mission to my own groin. Anyway, we cant show you the foot annual tonight, but hes here monday and well show it then. Great, sascha, no holds barred. I dont even know what that means, but it sounds good. Now, no telling yet what effect if any, this footage will have on the election. So far, the polls in some of the swing states are tightening along with my sphincter especially pennsylvania, where the latest polls have biden up anywhere from 10 to only 2 . Come on, pennsylvania you dont need trump you already have a perfectly good orange monster. Things are so tight right now, that in the last 24 hours, pennsylvania has gotten visits from both donald trump and barack obama. Its hope and change versus grope and strange. Last night, trump held one of his outdoor shout n sprays in erie, pennsylvania. But he made it clear he wasnt that happy about it. You know what . Four, five months ago when we started this whole thing, because, you know, before the plague came in, i had it made. I wasnt coming to erie i mean, i have to be honest, there was no way i was coming. Stephen ah, yes, nothing makes people feel more valued like hearing, im only spending time with you because of the plague, which, otherwise, i would avoid you like. Trump did eventually pivot from complaining about pennsylvania to complaining about his opponent. If you want depression, doom and despair, vote for sleepy joe biden. And boredom because if you had sleepy joe, nobodys gonna be interested in politics anymore. Thats gonna be the end of that. Stephen oh, my god, that sounds amazing heres just a preview of what we could be talking about if politics was boring again yesterday, one of my writers pitched a story about a popular internet video featuring a very long door handle. Look at how long it is it fits three hands you want to hear some jokes about that . Sorry, we dont have time for doorknob jokes because i have to talk about a president whos as dumb as one. Trump also went after biden by playing an attack ad for the crowd. Heres how he set it up tonight, i want to do something i want to give you this is an original donald trump broadway play. Take a look at this clip. Stephen yes, an original donald trump broadway play the book of moron. Also, its worth pointing out trump says hes presenting a broadway play, and then plays a commercial. as trump i love broadway. My favorite show tune is we have the meats. always makes me cry because at the end, they do have the meats. But despite the tight race in p. A. , trumps down in the polls nearly everywhere and needs to get his message out. Yesterday, he had a golden opportunity to talk with lesley stahl of 60 minutes. But, evidently, she asked him tough questions about his handling of the coronavirus pandemic, the size of the crowds at his rallies, and his disputes with anthony fauci. Because after 45 minutes, he abruptly ended the interview. Well, no surprise there. Trump always finishes before the woman. Whambam, thank you slam stephen not satisfied with just storming off, trump threatened to beat 60 minutes to the punch by releasing his own footage, tweeting i am pleased to inform you that, for the sake of accuracy in reporting, i am considering posting my interview with lesley stahl of 60 minutes, prior to airtime this will be done so that everybody can get a glimpse of what a fake and biased interview is all about. Oh, no mr. President on behalf of cbs, please dont post a teaser trailer for this sundays episode of 60 minutes. 7 30 pm eastern, 6 30 central, only cbs. I hear he walks out. Should be pretty exciting. Now, after fleeing the interview, trump had a town hall where he continued to stew about 60 minutes and fauci. I get along with him fine, but hes made mistakes. And, you know, when he said he he really is stopped from going on television. Then you see him do 60 minutes, not one of the greatest shows in the world. Stephen okay, word of advice if you desperately need the senior vote, maybe dont go after 60 minutes. as trump 60 minutes is a show for losers, matlock is a crappy lawyer, and lets face it, nana, your grandkids are stupid and ugly. So trump says and does dumb things. But we should never let his stupidity overshadow that hes also a heartless monster who must be driven from office and eventually dragged in manacles before the hague. Because of all the horrible things he and his administration have done, perhaps the horribleist is their family separation policy on the border. And we got some chilling news yesterday in a court filing. You see, last year, a federal judge ordered the government to reunite parents and children that had been separated by the trump administration. And, well, the appointed lawyers just came back to him and explained the parents of 545 children separated at the u. S. Border still cant be found. We have two weeks to decide what kind of country this is going to be. Either this inhumane behavior is going to be punished by the voters, or just change the statue of liberty to read, give me your tired, your poor, and half a million in unmarked bills if you want to see the kids again. Think about the sheer number here 545 kids. Thats not a child on a milk carton. Thats the whole dairy aisle. And yet, there are still people who havent made up their minds. There are still people who are going to vote for him and i know that people vote on a lot of different issues. But now that we know that these children were stolen from their parents and cannot be returned due to things in of the administration, thats one of the things youre voting on. You cant say you dont know. Now, i dont believe the American People are evil. Maybe 545 kids is too many to wrap our heads around. Thats eight School Busses full of children. Or maybe we feel too guilty to understand the magnitude of that crime and our responsibility. You know, theres a reason you never see this episode of lassie. dog barks whats that, girl . Timmy fell down a well . And so did 544 other children . What . They were pushed in there by the Justice Department . Why would you tell me this . Now im sad and complicit in the crimes of my government bad dog stephen and tearing these children away from their parents wasnt some bureaucratic oversight. It was the plan. Cruelty was the plan. According to a recent draft report by the Justice Departments own inspector general, a top culprit was then attorney general jeff sessions, who reportedly told prosecutors at the border, we need to take away children. Well, thats what we get for choosing attorney general rumpelstiltskin. Another guy coming out of this not smelling like a rosen is former Deputy Attorney general and man asking if youd like to see his erotic stamp collection, rod rosenstein. When prosecutors on the border resisted this policy, rosenstein told them to separate children from their parents, no matter how young. A little advice it doesnt matter what you say if you follow it with no matter how young, its going to sound bad. Ill have the veal. No matter how young. Rudy will meet your daughter in the bedroom. No matter how young. 13 days. Go vote. Weve got a great show for you tonight. Bruce springsteen is here. Stick around. Smooth driving pays off with allstate, the safer you drive the more you save you never been in better hands allstate click or call for a quote today dynanana, nana, nana, eh dynanana, nana, nana, eh dynanana, nana, nana, eh light it up, dynamite shining through the city with a little funk and soul so ima light it up like dynamite cause, ahah, shining through the city with a little funk and soul ima light it up like dynamite, whoa my hygienist cleans with a round head, so does my oralb. My hygienist personalizes my cleaning, so does my oralb. My hygienist uses just the right pressure, and so does my oralb. Oralb combines a dentistinspired brush head with the gentle energy of microvibrations for the wow of a professional clean feel every day. My mouth says wow and so does my oralb. I like big jeans. Ittybitty jeans. Feelin trendy yall, with the straight jeans showin off those curves, cause you the queen everyone go slay in your Old Navy Jeans welcome to denim america. With fits for the whole fam. Only at old navy and oldnavy. Com you can get half off your second sandwich by using promo code saveon2. Greg booked another 7am meeting . Wizards wizard status perfect for you, and your new coworker. Just use saveon2, online or on our app. Stephen welcome back, everybody. He is an American Icon whose music has rocked us for over 45 years. His latest album and a new documentary are called letter to you. Please welcome to a late show, Bruce Springsteen bruce, thanks for being here. Thanks a lot, stephen. Good to be here. Good to see you. Stephen i watched the i watched the documentary this afternoon. Beautiful. Beautiful. Thanks. Stephen im not telling you anything you dont know. Thank you. Stephen but it was also great to see you back together with the e street band. This is the first time you have done in how long, six years . You know, id say, yeah, six or seven least, you know. Stephen i hope thats what my research told me. They would be in trouble if you said something other than six years right now. laughs i love seeing it might be a little more than that. Stephen i love seeing you guys together, guys and girls together. But it was a little heartbreaking to see you be able to hug each other and, like, kiss each other, and, like, drink together. It was like a time capsule we were looking at. Remember that. Stephen you have been performing since you were 16. How does it feel you have an album and know you cant go take it on the road right now. Well, i do a lot of work in front of my bedroom mirror with the tennis racket. laughs . Stephen so youre 16 all over again. Ive gone back ive completely gone back to when i was 16. I put the album on. I get the tennis racket, and i go for an hour. As a matter of fact, i go for three hours, just like the show. Stephen what is the but, actually, its a bit of a drag. Stephen i have to imagine it is, because you particularly, you talked about the last time we had a chance to talk, which is four years ago now, you talked about the magic trick, what you do when you for lack of a better word hook up your jumper cables to that audience. And they transform that energy that you give to them and they give to you. You transform that into a sacred space between the two of you. Where are you finding your sacred spaces now that you cant actually be doing that in front of the audience . Well, you know, through working the album with the band and through making the film, you know, you sort of commemorating those places and. That took a lot of my time. Though not near as much as it used to because we recorded the album very quickly, and really in four days, and we listened to it all on the fifth day, and we shot the film in the same amount of time. So they were done relatively quickly, you know. But ive been managing to stay as busy as i can. My little radio show that i do biweekly, and some other projects that im working on. So im not just wandering around the house and getting in pattys hair. Stephen the inspiration, as you describe in the documentary for this album, being the last man standing of your first real band, the castiles, for those who dont know, from 65 to 68, you were in a band called the castiles. And you went to the funeral of tell me the story of sort of how you were inspired by that funeral for the album. I had a relationship over the past three or foreyears with my old friend george theiss, who was only him and i were the last surviving members of our first band. And george got very ill, and he was ill for several years. And we stayed in touch the whole time. So i got to visit him towards the end of his life, and i came home and he passed away shortly afterwards. And i guess being the last last guy in my first band to remain alive sort of. I dont know, it must have it must have brought things up for me. Because a short while later. Started to write with the themes of mortality and life span and writing about taking music, which is a subject i had written about before, what it was like being in a band when you were young, what it was like being in a band 50 years later with the same people. You know, its an unusual experience. But theres some common humanity in all of it. So i just kind of dove into it it just opened a vein of creativity that that lasted for about seven days, in which i wrote almost all the songs for the album. And thats the way it happens sometimes. Stephen the public all knows you as the e street band together. Tell me about the castiles and what they meant to you in your discovery of music, or discovery about being in a band. I know for my business, those people that i first did comedy with at the beginning of my career, even if i dont work with them anymore, i know what i learned from them. I have a special love for those people. Yeah. Stephen and i was introduced to this idea that this might be my life to those people. What did you learn being in that first band . You know, well, i learned i liked being in a band. I learned i loved playing music. I enjoyed the camaraderie of being in a band, even though, you know, its filled with the usual tension and ebb and flow of of life, you know. But i knew it was something i enjoyed. And even though i was signed at columbia as a solo artist, i knew that i wanted to have a band. I wanted to have a regular group of musicians that i felt i was a part of. And, you know, so i mean, the e street band, goes back to when i was 16, gary, 18, you know, these guys were there for a long, long time. So its i always tell people, i say, imagine this, people youre going to high school right now, when youre 70 years old, those are the exact people youll be working with and will have worked with them for the past 50 years. The only place that that happens is in rock n roll. And it doesnt happen much for the very simple reason because people cant stand it. You know. Its like you know they cant stand each other for that long. Its a miracle. Stephen and the audience doesnt always stick around for 50 years. No, they do not. So its a its a confluence of very, very special events and some luck and magic involved that allows you to have a long life and career like weve been blessed enough to have. Stephen we have to take a quick break, but stick around, everybody. Well be right back with more Bruce Springsteen. Back in january, we knew that this was really, really bad. We had ample forewarning. But we did almost no testing, almost no contact tracing. Completely ignored the science, completely ignored the warning signs. There were things that could have been done. A lot of people have died needlessly, and theres nothing more frustrating than feeling like youre fighting against someone who should have your back. We are not going to stamp this out unless we have a change of leadership. Ff pac is responsible for the content of this ad. But thats tough to do on a fixed income. Id be hit with a tax penalty for moving to another county, so im voting yes on prop 19. It limits property taxes and lets seniors transfer their homes current tax base to another home thats closer to family or medical care. Being closer to family is important to me. How about you . Voting yes on prop 19. Stephen hey, everybody, were back with Bruce Springsteen, whose new album letter to you comes out this friday. Bruce, one of the things that also struck me about the documentary is you speak of the other people that you work with, you speak of so many of the subjects that youre talking about, not just in your lyrics but in your narration and talking about your life with ext