Stephen hello. What is the latest news . Really . She is dating travis kelce . . Wht else have i missed . The wga strike is over . Artificial intelligence can be used but cannot be crediteted aa writer or be a source of literary material. That makes sense. Why did that take five months . When does the show start again . Tonight . I am 2700 nautical miles from broadway. No time to waste. To. Sullivan. Lets go. Faster. Yes. I am good with the water. Okay. I think we have sold the idea that i am in the ocean. Thank you, friends. Stay. Keep him moist. I have a show to do. You cant park a dolphin h here announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight. Right back at you first, stephen welcomes. Neil Degrasse Tyson and lewis kato. Featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert. Stephen very much. Welcome one and all in here, out there, all around the world to the late show. I am your host, Stephen Colbert. It feels good to be back. It feels good to be with you again in the ed sullivan theater. After the first few months of the strike refused to quit chanting my name. The Writers Strike is over, there are protections against ai, better pay, better pay for streaming and thanks to the picket lines, my writers got fresh air and sunshine and they do not care for that. They are back safely in their joe coles, doing what they do best, making my teleprompter screen full of good and ha ha. Good to have you back. It has been a long time since our last late show. I believe we have been off the air for 154 indictments. Roughly. Stephen ballpark it. It was a crazy summer to be off. It was packed with events. It would be stupid to try to recap everything that happened over the last five months, so here we go. Starting with may, Prince Charles finally got his first job and the dress code was insane casual. Even for bennigans, that is a lot of flair. In may, a bunch of orchids attacked yachts and russia band late night hosts, including me, but they did not ban jimmy fallon. I am guessing because of his popular segment, slow jam the borscht. In june, wildfires in canada sent giant plumes of smoke down to the east coast turning new yorks air into satans butthole. June 8th, that was the day donald trump was hit with a 37 count indictment for hoarding National Secrets and we saw some unbelievable photos of where he stored them next to a guest toilet. Look at that. He left the launch codes in the splash alone. Can you imagine using that bathroom . We are out of toilet paper. Wait a second, never mind, i will make it to ply out of syrian troop movements. On june 23rd, there was an attempted coup in russia by Wagner Group Founder and pope francis evil twin. It looked like it might succeed but they kissed and blew up because two months later, totally unrelated, his plane exploded in midair. Imagine sitting in coach. Seeing the guy who overthrew putin walking down the aisle. I would be pressing on the call button, excuse me, is the diarrhea plane Still Available . In july, the heat records, the actors went on strike. They found cocaine at the white house in time for a massive blockbuster we can for barbie and oppenheimer. It turns out oppenheimer also had no. It is a long walk from that set up. There was smaller news. Aliens are real. A former military officer testified the government has seen ufos and has been aware of nonhuman activity since the 1930s, with its explains laurel ensor gone. Elon musk in july, he rebranded twitter as x to which the world replied why . Jack smith indicted the former president again. [cheers and applause] in a case alleging january 6 was fueled by lies from trump. It was brought to you by its two sponsors, trumps allies and recent divorce. Recent divorce stormed the capital. That will show brenda. Elon musk and Mark Zuckerberg almost had an mma fight and we got another round of trump indictments in georgia for election interference. On august 24th, trump was arrested at the Fulton County jail and we got a mug shot for the first time. [cheers and applause] yes. That is one anger glazed ham. I tried to match that face for a joke but i could never get it quite as close as my head writer. Really good. Spooky. Beautiful girl. Trump never passes up a chance to grist a dollar, so he sold posters, shirts, coffee mugs with the that mug shot was taken the day trump surrendered. It is a bit of a mixed message. Reminds me of when nancy reagan sold just say no tshirts. They tried to steal the election in georgia under the rico act. Which brings me to my ne new lel segment. That is all the time we have for that segment. Lets keep moving. There is nothing that says a convict cannot be president. If he wins, he might be able to veto bills from cellblock a. I am sure you are asking how he would get the pen in there. On visitation days, eric will be walking funny. Dad [cheers and applause] i should have used a ball point. That, in midseptember, Mexicos Congress had a hearing on ufos and unveiled what they said were alien bodies. Here they are. Someone forgot to water et. It is sad. We learned that Lauren Boebert got kicked out of a touring production of betelgeuse after they said she was causing a disturbance, which was yanking her dates crank at a familyfriendly show. She was trying to start him like a lawn mower. [cheers and applause] that was the choke. You have to get the choke out. You have to get 1 foot up, get a handful, and let the choke back in. If you dont put the choke back in, you will flood it. Speaking of getting caught with your hand in the cooking jar. Bob menendez. He and his wife were indicted on federal corruption charges for assisting the government in egypt. They describe the bribes as a pyramid scheme. We are back. [cheers and applause] when the fbi raided his house, they found cash in closets, safe, and the pocket of a jacket they found in his home. That is always a nice feeling when you put your hand in the pocket of a coat you havent worn in a while and you find half a Million Dollars in bribes and a jolly rancher. We have a great show for you tonight. Neil Degrasse Tyson is here. We will have a special performance by louis cato. I will be standing here with more monologue. Stick around. Announcer the late show with Stephen Colbert sponsored announcer the late show with Stephen Colbert sponsored by. Sometitimes jonah h wrestles withth falling a asleep. S. So he takeses zzzquil. The worldds 1 sleepep aid d fofor a betterer night slele. So n now, he wakakes up feelining like himimself. The reigigning familily room middleweieight champipion. Bebetter d days start t wih zzzquil nightsts. [traffic noise] [text message] lets ace this thing i got you coffee. Oh my god, what . 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Hes rigight, you knknow. Is thahat tiny troroy . The e ingredientnts in head anand shoulderers keep thehe microbess ththat cause f flakes at b b. Microbes, really . Theyre alalways on yourur scalp. Little rascals. But good n news, theres s no itchineness, drdryness or f flakes downwn i loveve tiny troyoy. Hehes the besest. Makeke every wasash count little helelp, please. E. Now w this is anan upgrade. Anand away we e go. Mmmmmm. drumming i can get t used to ththis. The bebest way to o see the wod is to exexperience i it, withth travel upupgrades and prprivate evenents from c chase sapphphire reser. Chase. E. Make more e of whats you. Stephen welcome back, everybody. Normally, when we do the show, i would be sitting over there talking about something. I have more monologue tonight, we have been off so long. We were recapping everything from the past five months and now we have made it to today. It was a big day. In new york city, a world leader came to town, taylor swift, who was at last nights jets game to watch travis, the football , the tight end for the red team. At the game, she drank some drinks, hung out with blake lively while Aaron Rodgers sat alone in the sadness box. This is all great publicity for the nfl. There are rumors taylor might be at the game sent to get prices surging. You couldnt afford to watch her and now you cant afford to watch taylor swift watch something. Her maybe boyfriends jersey saw a spike in sails and the shorts she wore to the game is sold out online. If this relationship doesnt work out, can you start dating one of our nations crumbling bridges . It is not an official celebrity romance until they have a couple name, which is why i am deeming them. The big apple got a visit from donald trump today. You are happy he was here. He is attending a civil trial he has already lost. [cheers and applause] last tuesday the judge took the rare step of issuing a summary judgment, ruling that when it came time for him to apply for loans, trump committed fraud by inflating the value of his properties and he was living in a fantasy world where he won the election, windmills kill whales, and this is 215 pounds. It was handed down by the judge, who can only issue a decision after five smaller judges combine their powers to form him. In his ruling, we like the graphic. He pointed out he claimed his apartment in trump tower was 30,000 square feet rather than 11,000 square feet. Why does he use a big lie when a small lie would work. It would be like a 15yearold saying i would like a cup of your strongest alcohol, what year was i born . 1935. Lets win in korea. That part is already decided and the trial is just to find out how much he is going to have to pay for his crime. The attorney general is seeking to have him find as much as 250 million. [cheers and applause] that is a lot of money, considering according to trout, that could be valued as much as 3 billion. In those brief moments, in those fleeting moments when he is not in court, he is on the campaign trail. Sunday he talked about clean energy and batteries powering vehicles and gave us this hypothetical. If i am sitting down and the boat is going down and i am on top of the battery in the water is flooding in, i am concerned. I looked 10 yards to my left and there is a shark. I have a choice of electrocution or shark. I will take electrocution every time. I will take electrocution. Stephen in summary, would you rather me be your next president or have a mouth where your is or have to eat a bug with your mouth but. Trick question. I will take electrocution. We will be right back with neil Degrasse Tyson. Stick around. Nnope. Canant sleep . . I cant slsleep eitherer. It onlnly gets tougher with ag. 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Roround cleansns better by s surroundingng each tooth to remove e 100 more e pla. For a supeperior cleanan. Oralbb. Brush h like a proro. Li stephen give it up for a louis cato and the late show band. Good to see you again. Were you able to make the most of the five months out there . Louis people were all over the world. These guys were in europe. We went to dinner once. Stephen thats right. There you go. We dont have time for that when we do the show. Fantastic. I missed the audience and staff but i have missed the privilege of sharing the stage with you guys. I made some friends this summer. I spent some quality time with strike force five. I want to think my buddies, jimmy fallon, jimmy kimmel, john oliver and seth meyers, who formed a podcast to help try to pay the staff here. Camaraderie, something approaching entertainment. I will not claim the show was good. It was something to listen to while you shop for potatoes on a saturday. I want to thank Bryan Reynolds for all the money he gave for his companies and as an aside, the editor who made our hour and a half rambles into actual shows. Thank you. Lets do it again, but not because we have to. My guess tonight is the most beloved astrophysicist and host of star talk. Please welcome back to the late show, neil gra Degrasse Tyson. [cheers and applause] nice to see you. We are back. Stephen it is so fitting you are my first guest bat. Between these two shows, you are my most frequent guest and may be my favorite guest. [cheers and applause] people asked me who is your favorite guest and i say you. Do you have any idea why . I have no idea. Stephen you burn with an incandescent passion about whatever the subject is. I often feel singed on both sides of my body after the interview. One of the issues for the wga and s. A. G. Is the use of Artificial Intelligence in our industry. People said it is going to change daily life to have Artificial Intelligence, hel helpers, help with productivity and those things. What are your thoughts . I cannot buy the fear. I am not that afraid of it. We have been embedded in ai since we could possibly use it. We seek it out. It makes our job easier. I have data that i am swimming in, i dont have the time or the energy to process it, to interpret it. You train ai to reduce the data, analyze the data and find the cool stuff and i do that while i am on the couch eating a twi twinkie. Ai is all around us. When you talk to siri on your iphone, there is not a human being in that exchange. Siri tells you the fastest way to get to grandmas house through the traffic that just swelled up in the last few moments. That is a form of ai. Ai beat at chess, in jeopardy. No one freaked out and ran for the hills when that happen. It only made headlines when it figured out how to write your term paper. All the liberal arts folks their pants. Stephen i am not going to let you go after liberal arts folks. I am going to. People said oh, my gosh, ai is bad and dangerous, lets ban it. If you knew how embedded we are in all variants of ai, you would not say that. Stephen what is the answer . To what question . Stephen to the fact a kid can have ai write write a term paper . Maybe, maybe education involves an oral exam. Where you actually know whether someone has learned it. Stephen you ask questions. Then you probe the mind of the human rather than at whatever was summoned at the keyboard. That is a deeper form of knowledge and education anyway and maybe we should have always been doing it but we have not. Yes, it is more labor, you probably need more teachers and you might have to pay them more. [cheers and applause] stephen you settled it, you fixed it. I fixed it. Real quick, i just learned days ago that 15 of my books were used to inform the ai Search Engines for their content. Stephen how do you feel about your material being used as raw material for somebody elses business . As an educator, why do i write books . So you can learn what is in the book. If you can learn what is in the book faster by having ai grab it, i have to think about that. It is 15 out of 183000 books. If you do the math, that is 1 out of 12000 of the ai engines processing comes from my books. I was honored but a little creeped out by it. Stephen a little creeped out. You felt a little like a liberal arts major. [laughter] stephen you can understand where they are coming from. We have to take a break. We will be right back with more neil Degrasse Tyson. Itss not just t designed to looook good. Itss built too commmmand attentntion. Its notot just a comfortatable interirior. Itits a quietet refuge. Theyre nonot just headlightsts. They ligight the way forwrward. The nenew fully elelectric audi q8 8 etron mododels. Is it t menopausee or s something e else . Whwhy dont i i feel like e my . 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