Did not turn the my thoughts on the real problem. And i never said you were i never said you were gadget khazan i just said that i always admired how you organize your Business Life well its not a gadget because then im on an i phone i mean i would imagine theres not its really wasnt that difficult im just lost ever since radio shack closed my life hasnt been the thing you know howie folks know he had some a. D. D. O. C. D. Problem you know i have a d d o c d where im constantly changing what im completely obsessed with but how he was always a bit of a you know german likeliness guy the worlds come around to you my friend. Yeah but thats not really a good thing you know the thing is this is the nightmare that ive been living every single day of my 64 years on this earth almost 65 days on this earth but theres something about having a nightmare where you have those moments where you wake up and you go who now is the nightmare and now you wake up and were all living in the nightmare its not a dream its reality so thats its not comforting and dont feel like i was ahead of any curve i do suffer from a lot of Different Things that dont have letters but i guess i. E. D. And depression and those are all part of i got a whole package deal somebody who set me up mentally was on groupon because they got me absolutely everything started im a bit of a mess but you know im getting through it and im surrounded by amazing people and a great family and good medication as i speak to you and my therapist this is an all new tax bracket just because of me so i think im ok. Thats always a sign when you have your own wine locker and human door at your psychiatry its you know that here you are there on a regular basis you know how when i was younger i used to have some of these things where i would get ear wigs or whatever theyre called and i would start to notice things and they would flash on to what felt like an uncontrollable loop in my head it was interesting to me why i would i would have flocked to medication when i 1st noticed that i dont think that was as prevalent but i did notice that it was based on fear in my case and when i used to think im never going to be able to get this thought out of my head and that would really panic me i remember would grab me i would the only thing that i fought back with us i would tell myself ok good try to think of that every single 2nd and in that only then it began to fall away only by. Little. That made you know he wasnt i thought i must be hard but thats part of the therapy but i think whats been you know you and i are almost the same age you know and thats i think we probably are you how old are you and im 66. Well were all just bobby 65 this year so in our age and when we grew up you know there and there still is a huge stigma attached to you know Mental Health issues and Mental Health issues are is prevalent you know in each and every one of us as you know having a low a back problem or a bad knee your or whatever but we didnt do anything about it i spent my whole life not doing anything about it and what kind of promotes it even more and i would imagine that was your issue too is these weird thoughts that we have and these weird obsession and that are going through our mind intellectually weak we understand that this makes no sense or ive already dealt with this move on the fact that we cant move on i think the more aware you are the harder it is the scarier it is you know that. Line ignorance is bliss is truly it works but you cant be ignorant i know that my thoughts make no sense i know that i need to stop and one of the things that you were doing is you know you took control of it and you go i mean i think of it again but my o. C. D. In my in my life time has actually stopped my life you know you watch somebody like the movie Howard Hughes or read the book about Howard Hughes i mean heres a guy who had everything and had intelligence and was moving the Film Industry in the Aerospace Industry ahead and then he ends his life in the fetal position naked being into a bottle in a room which sounds really farfetched but i cant tell you enough how close to that i am at any given time. Yeah you know you pick out a perfect example and use i used to always think the same thing about the sonic brilliance of brian wilson i used to think boy this guy the price he paid for hearing it perfectly all of it in one beautiful wall of sound was that eventually ended up in a sand box in his bed and whenever i hear about people who are able to pharmacologically adjust themselves you know i know theres problems with pharmaceutical companies that i always say thank god because i agree with you holly you cant will yourself out of this in some way if you dont even find a trick or some sort of key to which us doing it or some sort of pharmacological help the fact that you cant get yourself out of it makes the wheel spin even faster in the month doesnt matter but to hear somebody like you and hopefully me talk about this removes the stigma i think the 1st you know. Life preserver that was thrown to me was accidentally you know mentioning it you know and it was accidental and i mentioned it in a public place on a radio show and i was devastated and i thought not only in my devastated i probably just devastated and barris my family i probably ended my career and as luck would have it as i walk out of the studio contemplating running directly in the traffic you know somebody said i just heard you and me too and thats before me too meant something totally different i said what do you mean he goes i suffer too and that was so you know heartwarming to hear that im not along because all of us are dealing with this in these moments no matter who we have in our life its very lonely and you feel like nobody is going to understand and nobody deals with this and i think we all do and whether it is something as i just mentioned diagnosable but it is very different then i mean is it is not different than all of us how do you cope with you know losing somebody you love how do you cope with you know the breakup of a relationship how do you cope with being diagnosed with something or somebody you love being. Diagnosed with something catastrophic or how do you how do you die how do you deal with just not being able to be productive because youre watching everything on the news now and the world has got you down and it just shuts a lot of people down i think there isnt anybody alive that doesnt need a coping skill and i think we are lucky people in the ability to identify it and maybe do something about it maybe come up whether youre coming up with your own coping skill or youre reaching out and getting it from anybody im not condoning medication im just condoning you know removing the stigma and talking about it and for me the biggest. Panacea has been distraction and whether its my career and acting silly you know and making strangers laugh and you know just being busy that keeps me out of my own head and outside in the world. Yeah if the i hate to do the avuncular older guy but im telling you kids anybody out there who listens as of a certain age there comes great wisdom in your life from the hardships of your life and just getting something to us soon resign under a ball on the outside of your head instead of the inside of your head and having it fall on the ear of another human being a sympathetic human being is a great healer just remember that i cant tell you how to live your life young people what is up. Out there but i will tell you if its getting it from inside your head and outside your head is a great 1st step just whatever that whatever i love that stick in that youre great youre. No thats an amazing experience that is you know i do this you know Mental Health is my little soapbox and you know i go speak on capitol hill to try to get the Insurance Companies to mirror their funding for Mental Health like you do for dept of health i believe that you know we should take care for physical health i was about to say but i believe we should take care of our Mental Health like we take care of our dental health you know you go get. An x. Ray just to say hey look mom no you have a t s but theres nothing in place in our regular curriculum for people out there to go once a year and just have somebody ask you a battery of questions and see if your responses are you know healthy way of thinking is just not there so were kind of left out there on an island on her own so that was just great advice that is the life preserver you got to get those were you got to get outside of your own head the worst place i can be at any given time and especially in these times right now is inside my head its the darkest place you can imagine you know i once did this movie i did a movie with Blake Edwards and i reiterated this story in my book but its such a true story for a lot of us that are in this business but it was about this this guy lying in the corner of his Psychiatrist Office in the fetal position just in tears just bathed in tears and he just said dr weve tried everything and im going to tell you. That i give up i give up when i leave your office im just going to take my life im just going to put a gun in my mouth and take my life and he goes well wait wait wait wait lets just give me one more chance the doctor says and he and he said listen we tried medication didnt work we tried hypnosis didnt work im going to try one more thing and youre going to think this is crazy but theres buffalo the clown the circus just came to town and bought the clown is is there tonight and bothwell the clown is this world renowned clown who has made everybody laugh people have die laughing all over the world that he believes that you know laughing is the best medicine and laughing you know kind of. Releases indoor fins that can fight this this pressure and the sayings id and whatever is this darkness you just have to laugh and i have to send you to buffer the clown and the guy looks up through the fetal position through his tears and he says dr i am buff of the cloud. If you want to know what makes good bt and slap it a room together its not the i am buff of the clod but what people do the aristocrat big and string it out and pace it and give it up to the point where you have to get that 1st saw so when you drop the ending it works thats the beauty of a great how hes always been that man always said impeccable timing when we come back i want to talk about the long strange trip from i remember just meeting holly the 1st time on the road and now got intrigue goal in the culture a lot of these things these touchstones over the last 20 years that have mattered so much to people how we write in the middle of the belly of the beast doing it with a high degree of aplomb a good sense of humor and i think you can see a nice sense of humility along the way and i think that keeps him and that step with the american folks well be right back with a great howie mandel right after this and then a smaller plus one. No no crowd. No shots. Actually no. No. Point your thirst for action. A focus welcome back to Dennis Miller plus one and i feel like i want to see my therapist i used to always tell my therapist after our 1st segment i used to always leave and then when i go see him the next week hed say how was the week did i say its like the hairdresser when i leave here it looks great i cant blow it out to look like that on my own. I dont like im sorry that was a cathartic 1st segment with how he bed l. How he tell me about this tell me about. You know its funny these shows in some way are like major bows are ted mack and all that stuff but i almost feel that there is a sacred trust there when people who want to show their wares to the public. They can be told if its not going to worry theres a delicacy about it though that i find very enduring i think that not everybody its not always brutal simon sometimes brutal but hes sometimes very wise but i do think when somebody risks a young person heres what i do what im really proud of but theres a real delicacy about it i think euro is and this is humanity and its humans and we know that you know listen ive always had the i was fascinated by always been fascinated by anybody performing anywhere and i love shows and i love watching shows. And i love watching people try and i i know that talent or humor is subjective but you know i became really cognisant of the fact that when we started going to the comedy clubs you know in in the seventys we would see people up there on amateur night that were i used to think why is this person even here like everybody talks about how hurtful it is or painful it is to watch a comic just die you know and just just eat crap you know and you see these people on amateur and i think get up and but then you realize nobody is there of their own fruition they really are they needed at least one other person at a dinner table to go you know you should you know what you should do you are funny you need to and then i think that people like you and me even though theres i think youre brilliant and theres a skill involved but were also lucky that whatever that skill is and whatever your sensibility is the shared by a larger group than just uncle nathan at the thanksgiving dinner you know yes you never know it doesnt mean its not funny because nobody laughs it just means that you know your sensibility doesnt really translate beyond your own mind so in knowing that you know i also feel and i know that you know i always talk about theres a Little Pinnacle in my career and this is and i bring this on americas got talent to you know one of the highlights of my career was selling out radio city music hall and i did 2 shows in one night and sold it out in a couple hours and my wife and i were in new york and in between the 2 shows im in the dressing room and were looking out the window of the 7th avenue in manhattan and 7000 people are pouring out of the theater and 7000 people are worrying into the theaters 14000 people in this man on the on the street and that concept stanchions and theres a quagmire of traffic and this is new york city and im just idiot potts from toronto and my wife says what are you thinking you know this is men have honestly what i was thinking. And i told her this this is a city of 10000000 people 9000000 984000 people dont get me that im here. But i still believe that you know theres always more that dont so even though i dont get it or i dont like it or i dont i try to be constructive and i feel that you know simon callow gets the bad rap of maybe being mean hes never mean hes only been honest hes honest and you know they plucked him when he started on American Idol from the Music Industry from being a Music Executive and you know this from just everything weve done from movies to t. V. The way he talk to us is the way you know people casting people would talk to us in a room would say no thats not right youre not right for the part what are you thinking tried a different way or do that which on American Television and i guess on all television came off that was like shocking when he came to American Television we never heard that everybody was so fluffy and rosy and and nice and whitman complimentary even on the gong show he was the 1st person that brought honesty to t. V. So you know i feel the need to be authentic and be constructive but not being hurtful and i know how i am kind of i dont have a thick skin personally and i dont imagine i dont when im out in public i dont imagine anybodys skin is anything other than mine so i only talk to people and deal with people in the way that i would hope that im dealt with. Yet i will at once again i think what the how it will if you boil it down folks if youre going to try hollywood. At some point the biggest thing somebody can give you is when they get transactional with you instead of condescending dismissive or just moving you on down the line without b. Talk at some point because a stone killer he has an ear where he knows whats going to sell if he takes the time out of his day to tell you i think youve got this but this is the next week this needed youre going to get 8000000 people to tell you i love it you walk out the door and they make fun of your head shot theyd be its a brutal business at least callisto innocent than i agree with ali thats one of the its all i dont need to get along with everybody in showbiz i do need an honest bounce off the people in charge of it and i think my mentioning of said you know in 2005 right before i got the other not leaving the business i felt like you know it is even when its not that mean just by the fact that you are exuding whatever your sense of humor whatever your talent is whatever i felt like i you know my job was to get kicked in the nuts each and every day you know and i couldnt take it anymore and it was really painful in fact the offer from this just how you take things the offer for me to do deal or no deal was the biggest insult of my career ill go up on my on my manager at the time because if you take yourself back to 2005 there were no comedians hosting game shows you know the last comedian before that that hosted a game show was roger marks doing you bet your life and when your currency is irony and comedy the Game Show Host was the lowest rung on the totem pole so i thought listen im walking out of my career with dignity and now you want me to expose myself to put another nail in the coffin of my career i wont do it and you know eventually my wife made me do it and ended up being the biggest you know plus in my career ive ever had but you know its a hard its hard to be talked to its hard when people are honest with you this is not always a fun career im not complaining im thrilled that i got to do this and every day i wallow in the in the fact that this is like a dream and i cant believe im here and i cant believe i do this and i cant believe this place and rep i feel very lucky but its not easy psychologically. No it isnt but then again i remember i used to whine to my mum a little when she was still alive and shed always like an inch is it what are you telling me i said well i got a brutal review mum and she said you know in a world where Childrens Hospital in pittsburgh exists in a world where kids are coming but my mum was very wise in this way i remember her slap me and god so thats the price you have to pay to lead the life you lead us to be on television you know she said thats the price you got a bad review and shed look at me and give me that look like for shame. Tell me about the judges table th