Christmas nativity plays are fraught with danger. The tea towels on the shepherds’ heads can unravel or Baby Jesus can be tipped from his manger (a crime of biblical proportions when using a real baby). And there’s the constant risk of someone fudging their lines so appallingly that the audience is overcome with hysterics. Parents perch on the edge of their seats, hoping against hope their progeny will reveal themselves as a star in the making—after all, Orsen Wells got one of his early breaks when he trod the boards as Mary in a school nativity play! My first ‘serious’ nativity play was when I was about 13. The venue was the Wellington Town Hall and I was cast as Mary. The occasion was made even more splendid because I had a huge crush on ‘Joseph’. It could have been the start of something beautiful. Me, seated on a hay bale for most of the evening. Him, standing companionably at my side. Both of us gazing at the light bulb that doubled for Baby Jesus.