But it has not survived and I cannot ask Jack himself I wish you well with your walk however I must ask you not to apply to me again Yours sincerely Algernon Carlyle. 'd RINGBACK Jack Millis Journal 7th generate 937. It's all over I'm not going across many year in the article. The way they watched me when I entered that pope he was off the Strand so my usual Holton full of well to do professional types of whisky and fog of expensive cigar smoke even the barmaid was a cut above the 4 of them sat at the corner table watching me showed my way through their war Oxford bags and tweed jackets with that elegantly worn look which he one equired country house weekends me in my scuffed shoes and my 60 burden suit we said I hellos Sunday relaxed a bit when they heard I don't actually drop my ages but I was so busy wondering if I could afford the drinks that it took me a while to work out who was who. Carlyle is fat and freckled with pale eyelashes and sandy red hair he's a follower rather than a leader Hugo Charteris black is thin and dark with the face of an inquisitor looking forward to putting a match to another heretic Teddy winching i'm has bulging eyes that I think he thinks of penetrating and Gus Balfour is 100 some blonde hero straight out of the Boy's Own Paper. All in their mid twenty's but keen to appear older Carlyle and Chartres black with mustaches Balfour and wintering and with pipes clamped between their teeth I knew I hadn't a chance. So I thought to hell with and give it to them straight open scholarship to u.c.l.a. The slump putting paid to my dreams of being a physicist followed by 7 years as an export Clark at Marshall Gifford they took it in silence but I could see them thinking how frightfully middle class and university college not exactly spray gin for I asked about Marshall Gifford and I said they make high quality stationery they export all over the world I felt myself reddening then Algy Carlyle asked if I shoot Yes I said crisply Well I can shoot but not the kind of shooting this lot are used to now Di Carlo I was thinking the same thing because he asked rather doubtfully if I got my own gun service Patton rifle I said nothing special but does Ok That elicited a collective wince as if they'd never heard slang before I tell you wintering I mentioned while listening and asked if I knew my stuff I said I should think so after 6 years of night technical school then Gus Bell for the honorable or justice for sense that things were varying off track and started telling me about the expedition. There are 2 aims he began looking very honest and more like a schoolboy hero than ever one to study high Arctic biology geology and I stand I mix to that end will be establishing a base camp on the coast and another on the ice cap itself which is why we'll be needing a team of dogs Secondly and more importantly a meterological survey transmitting observations 3 times a day for a year to the government forecasting system that's why we're getting help from the Admiralty and the War Office they seem to think our data will be of use if. Well if there's another war I said and you're planning to achieve all that with only 5 men this drew sharp glances from the others but good spell for took it in good part I know it's a tall order but you see we have thought about this the plan is algae will be chief huntsman dog driver and geologist Ted is the photographer America Hugo's the glaciologist for the ice cap side of things will lend a hand with a meteorology I'll be the biologist and. Expedition leader and you will be he broke off with a rueful laugh sorry we hope you'll be our communications man he seemed genuinely keen to win me over and I couldn't help feeling flattered then he got Charteris back spotted by demanding to know why I wanted to come and was I quite sure I understood what I believed in myself in for you to realize what winter will be like he said 4 months of darkness think you can take and I gritted my teeth and told him that was why I wanted to go for the challenge there like that I was going to have toned the real reason that have been mortified if I'd said I was desperate. After that things went Ok for a while then Gus Balfour glanced at the others armed nodded and said to me well now would you care to join our expedition I'm afraid I got a bit choked. Yes I said Yes I I should think I would the others looked merely relieved but for seemed genuinely delighted after that we fixed our next meeting and then I said my goodbyes and headed for the door but at the last moment I glanced over my shoulder and could tell you wintering and grimace and Algy Carlyle's fatalistic shrug Not exactly as he but I suppose I'll have to do later Jack. Tell you day what the hell are you doing I couldn't be part of their expedition if a company with them for a couple of hours how could I stand a whole year had end up killing someone as I headed home the fog on the Embankment was terrible there was a crowd on the pavement so I stopped there watching a body being pulled from the river someone said it must be another poor devil who couldn't find work you know thought the brush with mortality would have put things into perspective but it didn't I was still feeling when I reached the cheap station in fact I was so angry that I overshot my stop and I had to get out to Morton and back track to Tooting the fog was thick I intuiting you always is. Like the last one left alive stairs to the 3rd floor smelt of boiled cabbage and Jays fluid he was so cold I could see my breath my room wasn't any better I would have had my anger to keep me warm I got my journal and spiritual Out To hell with them I'm not going that was a while ago I'm 28 years old and I had my life I never have the time or the energy to work out how to change it. Tucked above the mantel piece is a picture called a Polish scene from the Illustrated London News a vast snowy land and black sea dotted with icebergs a tent a sledge and some husky dogs 2 men and Shackleton guess standing over the carcass of a polar bear that pitcher is 9 years old I cut it out of my 2nd year at u.c.l. When I still had dreams that's when it hit me just now staring at a policy. I thought of the body in the river and I said to myself Jack you idiot this is the only chance you'll ever get you turn it down what's the point of going on another year at Marshall Gifford and there were fishing you out of the Thames that's when it hit me it's 6 months to we sail from Norway I spend the whole night planning working out how soon I can handle my notice and still survive till July I am going to the Arctic. For the 4th of July the Grand Hotel tram so no thought no way I didn't want to write anything more until we reached Norway for fear of tempting fate I was convinced the something would happen to scupper the expedition nearly did 2 days before we were due to set off Teddy Wintringham father died he had to scrunch the others actually talked about cancelling would he be responsible to go without America I had a job keeping my temper to hell with a responsible way young fit man besides if anyone gets sick there's a doctor. And that's only what 2 days away from camp. Turns out that Hugo and Gus agreed with me because when we took a vote only tub of lard Algy voted against and since he's the last person to stick his neck out he backed down as soon as he realized he was are numbered afterwards I went back to my room and threw up then I got out my map of Spitzbergen the map because it's found barred because that's its new name but everyone uses the old one which is also the name of the biggest island that's where we're going. Camp in red there in the far northeast corner on the tip of the problem tree guy who can there's nothing there just the name on the map I love that and I love the fact that none of the 3 previous expeditions ever come to their I wanted to be ours and now here we are a trance or Tromso where an incident took off in his flying boat 9 years ago and was never seen again trumps are 300 miles north of the Arctic Circle My 1st encounter with the Midnight Sun only there isn't any the gentle penetrating missile hasn't let up in days but I don't care I love everything about this place because it isn't London because I'm free there's no dawn and no dusk time has no meaning we've left the real world and entered a land of dreams months ago Gus engage the British vice consul here is our agent he's chartered a ship to take us to group who can port Cole boats and building materials for a cabin and have them dropped on the coast to be picked up later he's bought a sledge and a team of dogs and got his permission from the Norwegian government to overwinter he's even engaged room for us at the Grand Hotel which is actually quite ground is also been urging us to have a word with ask Mr Erickson who's got some sort of problem with group who can. 26th of July the amounts of money we're spending it's frightening in Newcastle we both what we wouldn't be able to get a new way of powder fries eating chocolate and since no ways dry spirits tobacco and cigarettes in trumps are mountains of jam tea coffee flour yeast sugar and cocoa 10 fruits dried vegetables butter and crates of something called pemmican which is a kind of preserved meat one great for us another for the dogs but it was behind the rest of our equipment that really brought home to me what would be taking on tents sleeping bags I mean reindeer hides as Graham sheets apparently above all a formidable pile of paraffin lamps had lumps and electric torches it's hard to believe now in this endless daylight but there come a time when it's always dark thinking of that gives me a queer for through my stomach in a way I can't wait. I want to see if I can take it. Matter by Michelle paver was read by Lee Ingleby and Rufus right and it was abridged by Jeremy Osborne the producer was Catherine rose and it's a sweet talk production for b.b.c. Radio 4 that was Episode one at the same time tomorrow and how you and yours with Melanie Abbott Hello and welcome to the program. We're going to. How do you get people to listen to you will hear about the charities who fear they aren't being listened to by the main political parties but they're not the only ones struggling to get their point across How about those trapped in a mortgage deal dating back to the last financial crash all this time we thought it was just we thought we'd made a bad decision along the way we thought it was all our fault we felt such guilt sin in a shame about It'll Or what about the younger drivers who fears no one's listening when it comes to accelerating insurance costs the market that got a few different prices and was the cheapest that. We listen to you you can contact us you can email you and yours at b.b.c. Dock u.k. Or on social media you can use the hash tag you enjoy or you can text us on 8484 for 1st a meeting tonight to hear how the 3 main political parties plan to tackle disability issues in the u.k. Has been cancelled because only one party the Lib Dems agreed to take part it was organized by the disability benefits consortium which is a collection of around 80 charities and it's held similar events at previous elections so would labor and the conservatives not willing to attend that public debate how do people with disabilities feel they're being treated by politicians the B.B.C.'s disability News correspondent Nick. Funks oath them on a night out in Sheffield really really really really really. It's the highlights of the week king me is a finger in karaoke night for people with learning disabilities and they might really really it's a chance to have a drink have a laugh oh wait I'm put a cross in a box to maybe win some money. But when it comes to mucking about a paper on polling day what are the issues that matter here is a good tip because a possibility nothing is impossible tiny splinted if around for us. She's a when it's a night but she's not been so lucky can a job and is worried about money which takes away are 2 different job because I have a Pulitzer they are all kids are in an idea age they are just one who won't. Be able to come to Jane a paid job what kind of issues affect that makes you very sad why benefit wise died it's really a lesson in my life around feeling you're a politician that what you say. Change the benefits to the way the way. That. Nights because that just 6 percent of people with learning disabilities in England are empowered to walk so it's no surprise that many here I'm worried about money. The n.h.s. Social care and hate crime other issues that came up but many find it difficult to write their voices heard in an election there are approximately 1000000 people with learning disabilities who are eligible to fight for the Electoral Commission estimates the only one in for all richest it. How did you find it on your last legs a bit nerve wracking Haiti has registered to vote but she gets help from her support the have to process all. The questions that you would hear many Right I've seen. Yeah with. My point of view. Of it yes. To increase turnout all the major parties have released easy retractions of them on a fresh start but charity site these often publish to light not giving people like 18 year old 1st time voter to Cait enough time to get a head around who to fight for it training in general is accessible for people with Learn to speak. Like what you watch on the news. Harvest of the say I'm like I don't understand any of them number the fact is that all want to say yeah everyone should be entitled to have like a say in the life of what they would like and that should be more thing to the people that I think I want someone that will stand up for me and I actually mean it like it hot like you're saying it because it will get a vote 1st time voter Kate ending that report by Nikki folks done score is the head of policy and public affairs at the learning disability charity Mencap which is a member of the disability benefits consortium which plans tonight's debate Don why do you think it was impossible to get the 3 main parties around the table discussing this well I think we don't know exactly it may just be that it's you need to the election there could be other reasons but what we do know is that we're not the only organization that struggled we know that others have been trying to arrange hustings events and have also not been able to get spokespeople from the parties so there really is a bigger issue here around the priority that the political parties give to engaging directly with disabled people in other groups about their policies about their manifestos and hearing directly from people about how they're going to be impacted by those and answering questions openly and honestly we just asked labor and the conservatives why they couldn't make it the conservatives didn't get back to us and Labor didn't answer the question but did tell us in a statement that it would ensure disabled people get the support they need so they both have things in their manifesto about disability is this good enough well I think there is a real risk that disabled people will feel significantly left out of many of the major debates that are going on say for example with social care we've heard a lot from all the parties around increasing funding for social care very much focusing on older people yet half of the social care budget is spent on disabled adults of working age and the right to live independent living and live independently is something that's of massive concern to disabled peep. Well and so you'd expect that they also would be included in that debate around funding to make sure that they get support to live their lives independently yet that's been largely missing from the debate so far and again around around benefits you know another massive issue of concern to disabled people and their family and the parties have put out some proposals around this but it hasn't featured prominently in the debate so far we have seen Breck's it dominating the run up to the election does that explain this why disability is more the forefront Well it may have something to do with it but I think as I just said with with social care I think the importance of many of the key issues that are being debated and their relevance to disabled people hasn't been highlighted and the impact that those policies will have on disabled people hasn't been highlighted and with the event we had planned tonight now that was an opportunity for hundreds of disabled people to speak directly to senior representatives of the political parties tell them what they think about the manifestoes what's missing and what they should be focusing on whoever forms the next government you say is important to people with disabilities and yet we heard their Nicky's report that only one in 4 of them is actually registered to vote Well that's right and that's why we've been doing a big program of work with the Electoral Commission and others to explain to people how they can register to vote how they can vote and to make sure all the parties do produce their manifestos in an easy read format which in previous years they haven't done but clearly there's a lot more work to do to make sure that people with learning disabilities and other disabled people understand you know about the importance of voting in their fundamental right to vote the last person in Nicky's report that said that she wanted to hear from politicians who cared about her rather than just wanted her I mean how can politicians do that particularly when they're not attending events like yours Well I think has she said a lot of it's about the tone of the debate and politicians are you know shouting at each other arguing using lots of the. Implicated numbers that's not the way to actually engage people you know we need to bake that clear where people are clearly on certain questions and actually trying to get accessible information out to the public about all of their policies there are still a few days to go before the election but how most people made up their minds by now well I think there's a huge opportunity if the parties can focus on the key issues that matter to disable people in their families like social care like Social Security like special educational needs support there are a lot of people who will be listening to those messages and it will influence them in terms of how they cast their vote than score from men tap thank you very much for coming on to the program if you're young and a new Lee qualified Dr a your insurance will be pretty high over a 1000 pounds for 18 to 20 year olds last year so is there any way of getting those premiums down that's the subject of this week's smart consumer poll which is available to download now one person who thinks he's paying over the odds is Kiran Mattie's from Wolverhampton He's 23 he passed his test last month his insurance at 1700 pounds a year is more than 3 times the value of his 15 year old Vauxhall Corsa He's been speaking to our reporter Mike Young on compare the market that got a few different prices and up north was the cheapest at 17 and. What was your reaction when you saw that 700 was the cheapest you could get well just passed and I was quite exhausted only start driving and see the other parts of the churns and it's not a bit of excitement out of striving for as a 23 year old when you're talking about $700.00 quid as a percentage of your income this is a hell of a lot of money for you because they're sort of my career so I'm not earning the money at the moment so a large amount of money like same thing and it does take a sort of knock on. Where do you live it is where you live having an impact some to . There's an area that's got problems with burglaries or car Croyle much of that sort of students my 5 are just questions so if you've got a choice is it off a main road or look enough to draw the guy