I never miss an episode of whispering the late show. The late show with whispering Stephen Colbert. Stephen colbert. Stephen thanks have you met my other guest, the great tony hale from hbo . Yes, i love his show inaudible ah. Game of thrones. What . Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, stephen welcomes tim kaine, mark strassmann, tony hale and car seat headrest. From new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen hey thanks, everybody whoo whats going on . cheers and applause hey cheers and applause . Stephen hey, thank you so much thank you so much whats up . Good to see you. Welcome to the late show. Im Stephen Colbert. Can you feel the electricity in the air . Cant you . cheers and applause were making the turn into the general election right now and the first debates are just a few monday, september 26. Trump vs. Clinton. This time its president ial. laughter and im proud to say the late show will be broadcasting live right after the debate. This fall. cheers and applause every night. Stephen every night. Well be there. You will want to tune in anything can happen. Because, during the debate, im going play this game where i drink the whole time. laughter . Anytime they talk. Anytime they talk. applause now, this is interesting. You know how, when the candidates are preparing for the debate, they get a sparring partner . Someone to play against so they could figure out what their opponent is going to be like . The party acts like their opponent so theyre ready for that. But trump is so unpredictable, i dont see what the problem is. Just put a jack o lantern on a drunk bear. Youre done cheers and applause . . Meanwhile, last week we found out that former fox news c. E. O. , roger ailes, is advising donald trump for the debates. Sexual harassment. So dont miss this truly historic debate when americas first female president ial candidate gets called sugarcakes. laughter applause what its a compliment its a compliment stephen yeah. Trump was in jackson mississippi yesterday, where he was joined on stage by nigel farage, one of e. U. I dont know what the folks of the deep south have in common with angry white people who want to leave a union. But evidently, they liked him. cheers and applause and when trump addressed the crowd, he went right after Hillary Clinton. Hillary clinton is a bigot. Stephen wh whoo now tell us if thats good or bad . Whoo dont know. Might be a compliment. laughter youre a bigot, sugar cakes laughter i know its hard to look away from trump, but lets play that clip again, and i ask you to focus on the woman behind him. laughter stephen that woman looks like shed been goosed with an ice pick. She looks like she just woke up from a coma to discover shes a trump supporter. laughr was i bad . laughter with everything Donald Trumps been up to lately, it can be easy to forget that one of the things hes doing is running for president. Tonight, he was supposed to give a speech laying out his new immigration policy, but instead hes at a fundraiser in aspen. To be fair, a lot of people visiting colorado immediately forgot what they were supposed. To do. 11 million undocumented immigrants. And if you disagree with him on that, well, now he does, too. You seem to, in the last week, be revisiting the issue of sending everybody back that is here illegally. There certainly could be a softening. Stephen this is crazy. The one thing we thought we knew about donald trump was how he felt about immigrants. Whenever he spoke on the subject, he was practicall this is totally against his brand its like smokey the bear saying im softening my position on forest fires. Matches are cool but now, trump says he hasnt made up his mind on immigration. In fact, last night, he asked his supporters what they thought he should think. applause now, can we be, and ill ask the audience, you have somebody whos terrific, whos been here 20 years long court proceeding, long. Everything, okay, in other words to get them out. Can we go through a process or do you think they have to get out . Tell me. I dont know, you tell me. Well lets do a poll. How many think they should go through a process that maybe give them a chance . Clap weve got to hear you. How many people . applause how many think they should go . applause stephen what . Whats happening . Not entirely sure what we learned right the. Dana freeling. Whats happening . stephen thank you, dana. applause she speaks for many americans. I look forward to trumps state of the union address. as trump my fellow americans, the state of the union is. Quick poll. Strong . Weak . Damp . Yell it out. Anything you want. laughter the people. He asked them a lot of tough questions, all at the same time. Look, let me ask you the process. You have somebody thats been in the country for 20 years, has done a great job, has a job,everything else, okay, do we take him and the family, her or him or whatever and send them out . And they are gone . Do we tell these people to get out, number one, or do we work with them and let them stay in some form . applause wait, wait, so the bad ones, the gang members, all them, what do you think . applause so now we have the person 20 years, been an upstanding person, the familys great, everyones great. Do we throw them out, or do we work with them and try . audience reacts wwhoa. How many say work with them . Number one, number one, well say throw out. Number two, we work with them. Ready . Number one . cheers number two. Stephen i think its fair to say, that was a pile of number two. cheers and applause but lets ask the American People. Listen to me right here, okay . laughter guys, if you think trump should not have asked two or more questions at a time, shout out option one. If you think it shouldve been one question thats number two start clapping. And if you disagree, stomp your feet and yell. Go. audience reacts perfect. Thank you. All right . Jon yeah stephen somebody write those results down. In all the chaos at trumps town hall, one voice rose above the crowd. Look, this is like a poll. Theres thousands of people in this room. Who wants those people thrown out . audience reacts who wants them . Who wants them . Whos the guy that wants them thrown out . The guy that wants them thrown out, stand up. Stephen well, of course that guy agrees with trump. Im pretty sure its mike pence cheers and applause jon just like him. Now based on that town hall, i think i know what his decision will be letting the American People decide which immigrants are allowed to stay, in a reality show called so you think youre one of the good ones laughter lets play right now. Starting with our first undocumented contestant, Juan Martinez he has had a steady job, no criminal record, he is an active member of his church, but, on the other hand, he does smack his gum real loud and still has his Christmas Lights up. So, lets ask the mob, is juan one of the good ones . If you think he is, shout one. If hes won a green card, shout won, and if he should be deported, shout juan. Go just as accurate. Stick around. Weve got the democratic nominee for Vice President , senator tim kaine. Seems like o nice guy cheers and applause . [ tires screech ] flo [ ghost voice ] oooo [ laughs ] jaaaaamie, the name your price tool can show you Coverage Options to fit your budget. 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Stephen my first guest tonight is a former governor, current senator, and Hillary Clintons running mate. Please welcome, tim kaine stephen welcome to the show. Have you been on a talk show like this before . I never v. Never dreamed i would. Stephen you will be doing a lot more of it over the next few months. Well see how tonight goes. Stephen so far, so laughter how long did you know that you were the Vice President ial pick before the rest of us knew . About 12 minutes. Stephen seriously. Yeah, Hillary Clinton called me about 7 32 friday, july 22, not that it was a memorable moment, and we talked and she said youre about to get kidnapped and i have a team about a mile away to get you. I said how much time do i have she said, about 15 minutes. So i had to race, tell my wife and kids and call my parents. Stephen how did she take it . laughter we had talked about it before. Stephen okay. O she was, you know both of us were overcome with emotion, we really very were, and im so proud to be a running mate with such a great person. cheers and applause stephen well, when you say its like being you know the scene at the end of e. T. Where they go up into a big spaceship. Yeah. There is just a huge operation, a president ial campaign thats been going for 20 months is just massive. So 33 days, i think i have been in 24 states, done all kind of events and the next stretch from here to november 8 will be super intense, but if you have to be on a president ial campaign, just get to skip all the really hard work. I look at Hillary Clinton and what shes had to do for the length of these months and days, its really hard work. Stephen let me ask you an important question, how is her health . Is she okay . Can she sit up under her own power . laughter i think she could beat me in the new york marathon. But we cant do that because theres a campaign to run. Stephen before you accept the position, did anything . Joe biden said i want lunch with the president every week. When hillary asked me, i started to say yes and she said, i want to tell you why first. She didnt let me answer. What we ended up talking about is she said the test of what we do is not bill signing, its does it make it better for kids and the people, the workers. I have been a mayor, governor, the federal level, i think you can help me govern. So we got into the governing stuff. Stephen youve had a lot of roles. City council, mayor, governor, lieutenant governor, senator. Is there one thing that applies to all the jobs and the seal on your door gets prettier . I would say, i was a missionary in honduras 35 years ago, a civil rights lawyers 17 years, bridge builder, im about reconciliation and bringing people together. applause stephen you were a jesuit missionary. Yes. Stephen do you have a favorite part of the bible, a favorite quote from the new testament . From the new testament . Stephen thats the jesus portions. Yeah, thats the jesus portions. I would say pauls letter to the philippians. Stephen really . Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit but with hue yourself. cheers and applause stephen im a big fan of philippians whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are just, righteous, set your mind on these things. I dont have a third philippians to to you, so stephen okay. Hillary clinton said im going to test you here, she saide that wanted to disagree with her. Yes. Stephen so please your new boss and Say Something you disagree with Hillary Clinton on. You think im new at this . laughter i was a lot governo i was a lt. Governor and my deal was the same with Hillary Clinton, which from me. You wont hear about it from the press or see it on tv. The relationship works if you play a supportive role if you are extremely candid in person and cant surprise folks. Stephen want to just whisper in my ear . laughter what about the the transpacific trade pac . This is something people didnt like. Mrs. Clinton helped with it, you supported it now youre both against it. What i was for was the president having the tools to negotiate the best deal possible. So i voted for something called the t. P. A. , fast track authority. Let the president negotiate the best deal. Stephen and he did. And he did. And the deal was on the table and ive got a real problem with it because i dont think the portions i really like, labor, standards and environmental standards, i dont think they can be enforced under this deal and thats why im opposing it. Hillary clinton said lets do jobs, increase wages and are good for national security. But if you get there you have to be a bill that can be enforced. There are concerns but thats the major one with me. Stephen are you familiar with your role as americas stepdad . A lot has been written about how you look like a dad or stepdad. America, meet tim kaine, your new stepdad. Tim kaine is making earnest dads everywhere proud. And from the prom, mister. laughter and tim kaine is that soccer dad who can sing around to any rap song but hums the cuss words. laughter cheers and applause are you okay with not being cool . I have been prepared for that for 26 years because i have three children who have been born. Stephen what did you think of trump softening his position on immigration . First of all, a Vice President is supposed to be an attack dog as the Vice President ial candidate. He called your friend Hillary Clinton a bigot. Do you have you know, ill take you off the chain right now. Go ahead after him. When Hillary Clinton got out of law school, she was working to help advance Racial Justice in the juvenile Justice System segregation in alabama. I got out of law school and was battling housing discrimination in virginia. Donald trump was a real estate guy who got sued by the Justice Department for discriminating people in housing writing the letter c on applications if they were minority. Hillary clinton has a track record all the way back to being a middle schooler in a methodist donald trump is for himself. cheers and applause stephen weve got to take a break. Stick around . Yeah. Stephen back with more senator tim kaine. cheers and applause nexium 24hr is now the 1 choice of doctors and pharmacists for their own frequent heartburn. For complete protection all day and night mmm this ham is great. See, we can agree. That one. Ugh, come on. Dad, can we turn up the heat . No. Put on a sweater. Honey, its called a barber shop quartet. No out what . That was in yeah finally, something the whole family can agree on. Oscar mayer deli fresh ham made with over a million ears of corn are picked a day here in olathe, colorado. And im glad we have a senator who uses his ears to listen to whats most important to colorado farmers. Michael bennet asked what he could do to help, and then worked with republicans to make a farm bill thats making a difference to all farmers in colorado. The thing that impresses me most about Michael Bennet we dont always agree, but he values our input. And i do trust Michael Bennet and i approve this message. cheers and applause . Stephen welcome back, everybody were back with Vice President ial candidate senator tim kaine. I didnt give you a chance to answer the question i asked you before the break which is what do you make of trump softening his stance on immigration. What do you have to say about that . I dont buy it because speaking spanish stephen i dont speak spanish. What is the spanish word for pander . I dont think that word exists in the spanish language. Its unique to the american political tradition. Stephen damn it. All right. laughter now, youre super busy right now. I think youre doing, like, 12 states in eight days. Did 12 in 8 and back out on the road starting today. Stephen well, before you know, earlier in the summary when it was first announced you were going to be the Vice President ial candidate, we remarkable simila similarity. You look a lot like my post production manager mark mark sp. We offered him to step in when but of course if you do step in, ill need you to be my postproduction supervisor well need to transcode that clip to dnx145 for the avid, then ill have jason export and send it down to control for rehearsal. Stephen that makes just as much sense to me as when mark says it. So what do you think . Do you buy him as your double . Stephen well, lets find ou who does. Jim . Hey, how aria . You hey, how are ya . Are you following the election . The political season. Yes. Stephen would you like to meet senator tim kaine . Hello, nice to meet you. Police dont forget to vote in november. Stephen does he look exactly how you thought he would look . I guess. Im picturing a white guy. Stephen they dont get much whiter. . I got tim kaine . . Who wants to meet the man . . Hes running for Vice President . . Its really him . Who are you supporting trump or clinton . Running mate. Tim kaine. Stephen from . Virginia. Stephen can you pick him out of the crowd . No. Stephen look over there. Is that him . Stephen come here. Senator. Hello. Stephen senator kaine. Hello. Stephen anything you want to ask tim kaine. What was the best part about city . Working with the local government. Stephen what city was this, stir . Richmond city . Stephen richmond city, virginia. What was the worst part . Stephen just a second. You were the mayor of richmond city, virginia . Yes. Stephen tim kaine here i have the real tim kaine any message you would like to get to Hillary Clinton . He spends a lot of time with her. A lot of time. Stephen great lady. Tell the funny story about how you an Hillary Clinton were at the bar and got locked in. I cant tell that story. Stephen you got locked in the bar and had nothing to eat so you had to drink liquor all the time. Thats what we did. Stephen the rest of your life you know this is what tim kaine looks like. Yeah. Stephen great. Thank you so much