Well done. Darrin, you better hurry up. Breakfast is almost ready. I know. I just saw it in action. Thats very clever, the way the pancakes flipflopflipflop no hands. Welcome back to the fold, darling. I, um, sort of broke training. I noticed. What about, uh, dumbo . Doesnt he object to your using. Yes, darrin objects. But its a special occasion because of the Morning Light. I have to catch the Morning Light so i can work on my painting. Really . Your painting . Mmhmm see . Ive almost finished the sketch. Im gonna enter it in the exhibit next week. Mother, i am not going to use witchcraft. Well, remember. Anything less than a masterpiece, youll be a disgrace to the family name. And. Ill be watching. [ ding ] oh mother mo [ scoffs ] okay, push. Thats a good girl. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. As i call your daddy, ill fix you something to eat. Well, there you are. Ive been waiting for hours. Well, im sorry, mother, but ive been very busy delivering my painting. Your painting . Yes. My painting. For your information, mother dear, my painting is gonna be hung at the charity exhibit. It might even win a prize. Well, that wouldnt surprise me. It wouldnt . No, of course not. Talent runs in our family. Mother, really not in front of tabitha. Not him, silly child. His selfportrait. And your second cousin lucretia has been working in stone for centuries. I often felt that derwood should lend her his head. I have often felt that we can do without the jokes about darrin. Darrin. He, incidentally, thinks my paintings great. That is incidental. What would whatchamacallit know about art . If you want an opinion of value, you should go to someone whos aesthetically equipped to give you a critique of your work. Whom did you have in mind . As if i didnt know. Dont be flippant, my dear daughter. You know i frequently haunt the avantgarde galleries. As a matter of fact, i dropped in at jacques gallery in new york who is henri monchet . Henri monchet henri monchet happens to be the latest rage in paris and, mark you, soon hell be the rage in new york. Well, im very impressed. Good. Now lets see if i am. What . Let me see your painting. Unhunh. No, its too late. Its already hanging in the gallery at the university. I told you id dropped it off when i came in. You mean its going to appear in public before your own mother sees it . You bet. Y. Life with that mortal has made you completely thoughtless. [ ding ] hows that . I got news. I think you hung it upside down. Over easy anyhow. Eggs make me hungry. Lets eat. Okay. Better lock the door. Oh. Right. [ ding ] hey. How did she get in . [ ding ] [ ding ] oh my stars and satellites it looks like shes painted it with a broom a whisk broom. Well, we can do better than that. O wizards and warlocks of arts of the ages, o palettes of paint and classical sages, this dreadful still life just take it away [ ding ] [ ding ] [ ding ] ah well, thats more like it. [ ding ] oh, fiddleyfaddley, i almost forgot [ ding ] there now. [ ding ] [ ding ] [ ding ] darrin, its almost 5 00. Hows that perfume layout coming along . Here, have a sniff. Oh, these look fine, darrin. There are a few changes i want to make you can tell him about it tonight. What do you mean, i can tell him about it tonight . He arrived in town early. Youre taking him to dinner. Not tonight, im not. I have very special plans. Sam has a painting entered in the art exhibit at the university we have to go there. But thats great cunningham considers himself a connoisseur of the arts. Hed jump at the chance to go to an art exhibit. An amateur art exhibit . Why dont you take him to dinner tonight . Because louise and i have other plans and because the cunningham perfume account crative weve ever had and taking him to the art exhibit can be the one surefire way of getting it. So, call sam and give her the good word. Okay. First i have to think of one. What . A good word. Why dont you tell her its a favor for the president of the company . Thats a good word. Not a minute too soon. If i dont leave right away, im gonna be late. Theres Something Else i had to do. What was it . Yes. Mr. Cunninghams perfume. He sent some to louise and me. 50 an ounce. Hmm. Ooh, mother, look at me. Im so nervous, its like stage fright. Dont worry, darling. Ill be with you in spirit. Wish me luck. Its been wished. What does that mean . Its getting so you question everything i say. Sorry. Byebye. Man on the local side of the news, art critic arthur bryan has completed his judging in the annual Charity Art Show on view at the university tonight. The winner of the first prize is samantha stephens. Larry in making the decision, mr. Bryan said that mrs. Stephens showed an amazing color sense and style for an amateur painter. Samantha won first prize well, hurry up. We must go to that exhibit. Now for a rundown in the world of sports. What is it . She won samantha won . Stunned a capacity crowd, setting a new worlds record for the high jump. And so, you say, what is art . Some say look in the dictionary, but i say what does a man who writes a dictionary know about art . If he knew anything about art, would he be writing a dictionary in the first place . No, i say. I say go to a man who has created something himself. Even if that man is only a man like i. A man who has created a perfume go to him, i say. That man knows art as i know art. And what does it take to know art . You ask. For the ordinary man, that is a difficult question. But and i use the word but advisedly a man who can sniff a fragrance or walk up to a painting and say, i know you. There is the essence of knowing art. Uh, im afraid that our exhibit is considerably below your speed, mr. Cunningham. I mean, its for kitchen creators, patio painters, like i. I mean, we wouldnt be on exhibit at all if it werent for charity. All the more reason. All the more reason, what . To know what you want and go after it. Once i say, i know you, the next step is, i must have you. I have never, never in my entire life said, i know you, to a painting or fragrance i didnt buy. I will say that for me. I always get what i want. Wow. Wow. Uh, ddont you think its getting a wee bit late . Yes uh, waiter . Louise here they come. Oh, samantha. Samantha, how wonderful im so thrilled for you i wouldnt have missed this for the world darrin, you must be very proud of her. When louise heard the news, we canceled our engagement and came right over. What news . Yeah, what news . You mean you dont know . Samantha won first prize. Theyre unveiling her painting any moment. Well, now, this is interesting. Oh llouise, are you sure . I cant believe it youre positive . Im numb. Who wouldnt be . Im dying to see your masterpiece. Theyve been waiting for you before they start the auction. Here. Ill help you. Mr. Cunningham. Mrs. Stephens, as chairman of the art committee, i just want to say how proud we are to have you here this evening. Thank you. [ applause ] hang on, i may go right through the floor. Now, ladies and gentlemen, as we promised you, the First Painting to be auctioned for charity is the painting that won first prize. [ applause ] ur guests to come up and examine the painting before the auction begins. Sam, that isnt yours. Ii know. Mr. Chairman honey, honey the signature. Look at the signature. I want to tell you, mrs. Stephens, im not used to paintings at amateur art exhibits saying i know you, but that one definitely is speaking up. All right, now, your attention, please. The bidding is about to commence. Now, do i hear an offer . I have an awful feeling. 25. That hes going to bid for it. He just did. Man 30. 35. That may be my signature, but its mothers handwriting. You bid against him. Ill see if i can figure this out. 35 once. 35 twice. Uh, 36 ah, now i have a bid for 36. Oh, i get the hint, stephens. I forgot it was for charity. 200. Now i have a bid for 200. Do i hear more . 410. I have 410. Do i hear 500 . 500. I know you can hear me how could you do such a thing . Will you please answer me . Its urgent. I have 800. Do i hear 850 . I dont think so. 850. Over her next painting . Please keep out of this, louise. I thought you people wanted my account. 900 925. 950. 950 do i hear 1,000 . Where are you gonna get 1,000 without a job . 1,000. Going once. Going twice. Sold, for 1,005 to the art lover in the gray suit. [ applause ] i told you i get what i want, if i have to say so myself. Mr. Cunningham. I call this good sportsmanship, darrin inviting us all over for a cup of coffee. Yes, hes a gracious loser, and im a gracious winner for 1,005. Well, i suppose i cant really blame you for wanting your wifes painting so badly. I suppose. Samantha and i will get things started in the kitchen. Let me oh, no. You and larry entertain mr. Cunningham. Mother. Dear. Im desperate. Mother, i have to talk to you. [ ding ] well, why didnt you answer me before . You knew i was here babysitting. Where did you get that painting . Oh, that . Thats henri monchets. Henri monchet . you stole it of course i havent. I just borrowed it. Itll pop back to jacques at midnight. Midnight . but its close to that now. Oh, really . Oh, i am late. Mother, you are going to sit right there on that table until this mess is cleared up. Mr. Cunningham is in there, and he bought that painting dont tell me that scent maker is here. Mmhmm. I tried some of his perfume. It burned a hole right through my robe. You should try some of my perfume, samantha. Its irresistible. Irresistible . Completely. But ill need it for tonight. Hmm . Please . Oh, fiddlefaddle. [ ding ] whew [ ding ] mr. Cunningham, why dont you leave the painting here . Well have it reframed, show it off a little better. You really dont want to part with it, do you . Louise . Larry . Anks. Mrs. Stephens. Im terribly sorry, mr. Cunningham. Uh, cream and sugar . That perfume youre wearing what is it . Oh, that. Uh, my mother makes it. Homemade perfume . Well, its an old formula. Been in the family for years. What a unique fragrance. That scent remarkable, fabulous aroma. Its speaking to me. Great what are the ingredients . Oh, mother would never tell anyone. Well, im prepared to make a very generous offer to her if shell sell it to me. Shed never sell it for money. What else is there . I happen to know that mother would love darrin to have that painting. Perhaps we could work out a trade. No, no. I dont think so. Cookie . That scent is irresistible. Are you sure your mother wont accept a very large payment . Oh, absolutely not. Motherinlaw, my boy. Indescribable. Louise . [ sniffs ] and so is that perfume. Its a deal the painting for the formula. Darrin, why dont you take the painting in the den . Now . Right now before mr. Cunningham changes his mind. [ sniffs ] [ ding ] why, with this new fragrance, i may start a whole new line. Naturally, mr. Cunningham. Ill have stephens get started on a new layout right away. That sounds like fun. Ill want excitement, something that will make it absolutely impossible for a woman not to buy it when she sees it. Well need a name that will make it as irresistible as it is. I have an idea. How about i know you . Brilliant stephens, what did you ever do to deserve a woman like this . Good night darrin, see you bright and early. Right, larry. Better get right on the ball. Believe me, sir, ive got a lot of ideas. So you didnt get the painting, but you got the perfume, and mcmann tate got the account, which is all larry was worried about, right . Just a minute. Just a goshdarn minute larry louise, will you ever learn to keep your big, fat and were you going to keep this a secret from me . Keep what a secret from you, mr. Cunningham . Samantha stephens. So that wasnt your only painting. Or your only style. This one ive got to have because this one is talking up a storm. Mr. Cunningham, that one you may have. You mean it . Quick, say good night before she changes her mind. Good night. Call you tomorrow. Good night, larry. Sam, what about that painting . Is it gonna disappear on him . Is it real . Or was that witchcraft, too . I told you this morning it was real. Oh, boy. Its getting harder and harder to tell whats real and what isnt around here. Come here. Wow [ ding ] good. Darrin . Charlie harper its great to see you, old buddy darrin, if you dont stop poking around, you wont even make dessert. Ill be down in a minute. Thats what you said 30 minutes ago. Something tells me youre not too anxious to see your old buddy. Not anxious to see charlie . Dont be ridiculous. He only happens to be one of the greatest guys alive. Hed be perfect except for one minor thing. Whats that . Hes rich, bright, intelligent, charming, and witty, and he excels at everything. Outside of that, hes a sweetheart. Sounds horrible. Ill hate him. Impossible nobody can hate charlie, not even me. Dont think i havent tried. Well, i bet he didnt graduate cum laude the way you did. No, he didnt. There, you see . He did better. He graduated summa cum laude, and he was three years younger than me. Oh, well. Ah, hold it. You were elected studentbody president , werent you . Only after charlie resigned so that he could devote more time darrin, you cant tell me that charlie was any more popular with the girls than you were. Lets put it this way. I had to beat them off with a stick. Charlie had his own wood pile. Whats his wife like . I dont know. I never met her. But if shes married to charlie, shes got to be gorgeous. [ doorbell rings ] there they are. Ill get it. Darrin . Hmm . I think your legs are cute, but i imagine the harpers would prefer to see you in pants. How can people say they dont know what angels look like . Aw, shes beautiful, dar, really something special. Thank you, charlie. And youre right. Tabithas very special. Do you have any children . Youll be sorry you asked. There they are. Triplets . It figures. Its two girls and a boy. Its a little hard to tell because of the hair. Well, as charlie is overly fond of saying, if youre going to do something, do it right. Theyre darling, arent they, darrin . They certainly are. Instead of cigars, i passed out pipes. Why dont we all go down to dinner . You know, dar, i really like your place. It has a good, solid home feel. Oh, how i envy you. I really botched our winter place in acapulco something fierce. Sams got a real flair. She can do wonders with anything. Well, she and charlie should get together, because he did a fabulous job on our castle. Uh, you have a castle . Mmhmm. I fell in love with it the minute i saw the moat. If charlie hadnt bought it for me, i would have just died. Say, dar, i hear, uh. I hear youre going great guns at mcmann tate. Yes. Hes head of their creative advertising. Hey, thats great. Congratulations, dar. Dont you have something to do with advertising . In a small way. I thought you bought two big agencies last summer. Just one. It was Brown Smithers unlimited. You bought Brown Smithers . Just for tax purposes. I dont know anything about the advertising game itself. Well, shall we all go into the living room where its more comfortable . [ imitating daphne ] i fell in love with it the minute i saw the moat. [ normal voice ] im not the least bit impressed. Im beginning to believe the only thing they dont own is this block. [ ding ] mother what are you doing here . Have you any idea how you sounded while you were trying to puff up duncans meager triumphs . Its darrin, and you know it. When are you ever going to admit the day after never. Well, if you had to marry a mortal, why couldnt you have chosen a superior one. Like charlie . I dont have to stand here and listen to you applaud Charlie Harpers accomplishments. I can go out there and listen to daphne do it. Oh, samantha, face it. Shes not bragging. Shes simply stating fact. Darrin, i hope you didnt have anything to do with that terrible meatcompany jingle not guilty. Oh. You know, charlie and i had a bet coming over here. He said that you would remember me and i said that you wouldnt. And you lose, right, dar . Well, uh, let me think. See there . I was right. I was the freshman campus queen your entire senior year of college. Yes, yes, of course. And i must say that your husband was the only redblooded male thank you i just didnt want to get trampled in the rush, daphne. Kids, i have a wonderful idea. Weve just opened up our house at oyster bay, and were having a few of our friends out for the weekend, and youre coming, too. Well have a ball tennis, swimming, golf, the whole bit. Well, i and, dar, you and i are going to talk some business important business involving you. Now, what do you say . Well, it sounds great, charlie. Doesnt it, honey . Well, im sure that mother is available. Oh, thats great. Then its all settled. Samantha, why dont you go upstairs and throw some things into a suitcase . The limousines right out front, and we can all go together. Sweetheart, im proud of you. Why . Because i agreed to let your mother babysit . Ill admit that does take courage. So does letting yourself in for a oneupmanship weekend like this. Its a shade over, above, and beyond the call of duty. Oh, well have fun. Anyway, i told you, i like charlie. It on. You really didnt remember daphne, did you . Not a bit its weird. You dont suppose she was a little bit of a snob even then, do you . Castle, indeed. Ooh. You have a wicked slam, senator. Oh, hi, sweetheart. Having fun . Uhhuh. First, charlie beat me at 8ball, then at darts, now across the pool. Ooh. Sorry. Yeah. [ giggles ] oh, wonderful, samantha. Youve set them again. Sorry, sweetheart. Oh, my, samantha, what a stunning ring. Oh, thank you. Darrin picked it out himself. Its so stark and modern. Tell charlie that the trend was away from the big diamonds, but hes so oldfashioned. And, of course, he can afford to be. [ tinkles ] oh, im terribly sorry i dont know how i could have been so clumsy. Would you say no to a lot more money . [excited scream] you just won a Million Dollars no thanks. Or no to more Vacation Days . Janet, im giving you an extra weeks vacation oh, ah. Nooo. What . No way. Who says no to more . Time warner cables all about giving you more. Like the most free hd channels and virtually unlimited movies and shows on demand, so you can binge all day. Call now. And dont forget the free tv app. Get ultrafast internet with secure home wifi to connect all your devices. Saving on mobile data fees, helps big time. Ner cable. For 89. 99 a month youll get free hd channels, 100 meg internet and unlimited calling to half the world. We can call aunt rose as much as we want now. Switching is easy. Get our exclusive 1hour arrival window, a moneyback guarantee with no contract to sign. Plus get free installation, tv equiment and epix included. Really . Honest. No. Credible is the only word for it. Now, charlie no false modesty, dar. It was fantastic. Hes already found another word. Well, who won . Charlie, by 11 strokes. Lets you and i talk a little business. Okay. Excuse us, gentlemen. Tell me, darrin, are you happy at mcmann tate . Very happy. Oh, thats too bad. It would be a lot easier to quit if you were miserable. Why should i want to quit . Well, you cant stay there and be president of Brown Smithers unlimited, too. Youre not serious. You can write your own ticket, dar. Thats how serious i am. Well, charlie, i dont know what to say.