Samantha . Samantha whats wrong, sweetheart . Wouldnt larry let you off. The account . I didnt get a chance to argue the point with him. Something a little more important came up like what . Like. Her are you referring to me . Im not referring to mahrooshkah samantha, can you translate that gibberish, or am i to be left in the dark . Now, dont try to brazen it out. She came to my office today and tried to pass herself off as madame maruska well, i saw through her little disguise and tossed her out on her ear howd you like them apples, endora . Uh, ssweetheart, mother wasnt in your office. She was with me all morning. Sure, she was come on, sam, dont alibi for her thats no alibi. She was here all the time. When, all the time . This morning, all the time. Your mother was really here with you . Yes, darrin, she really was. Youve never lied to me, have you, sam . No, sweetheart. Not even this one time. Darrin, mother was here with me all morning. I could forgive a little lie this one time. [ telephone rings ] hello. Oh, hi, larry. But y m madame maruska. I threw madame maruska out of my office along with a milliondollar account. So why shouldnt i be fired . Oh, darrin. I certainly cant allow you to lose that precious little job. And im not gonna sit by and watch you take the bread out of my granddaughters tiny, little mouth. Now, one simple incantation no well, it is my fault, in a way. No no witchcraft, nothing ill handle this my way. If i fall on my head, well, i fall on my head, but you stay out of my life darrin, cant i do something . No no [ door slams ] but im sure shell see me. I know i dont have an appointment, but ive got to see madame maruska. Its a matter of life or death mine well, maybe i can catch her between calls. All right, you can wait. But no promises. Mahrooshkah think that there is no more to say madame maruska, please let me explain. Forget it, stephens. Shes not having any. Larry. Mr. Steffins, i am so glad that you are here, also. Now i can be rid of both of you at the same instant well, you have every right to be angry. I cant explain my actions, but i am sorry, and i humbly apologize. I do not accept your apology well, then, dont. But youre supposed to be a businesswoman. At least look at the layouts in larrys portfolio. If you dont like them, ill leave without being told. But dont dismiss my company just because i made a little mistake. Very well, mr. Steffins. I wont have it said based on personal reactions. Hmm. Hmm dont play fair. Use madame maruskas lipstick. Isnt that something . I hate it goodbye, peasants it was all sewed up. You had to get that crazy idea madame maruska was a fake. Ole sweet deal. [ imitates slashing sound ] larry, for the last two hours youve been going on and on and on. Why did you do it, darrin . Why did i do it . The whole smear. Why . I cant tell you. You can tell me. No, i cant. You can tell me. Okay. I thought my motherinlaw turned herself into madame maruska to foul me up, so i threw her out. Cant tell me, huh . Right. Dont play fair. Use madame maruska lipstick. [ sighs ] best thing i ever did. Yeah. Great. Bartender yes, sir . May i . Hey, thats my paper. Thats my layout somebody stole it, line for line lets get back to the office and check the newspaper listings. Well find out who did this well find out whos guilty, and hes gonna pay, boy give me my paper well fix that dirty crook i didnt do it. I dont remember signing these authorizations. Well, i dont remember typing them, mr. Stephens, but there they are authorizations for newspapers, posters, leaflets, billboards. Billboards, too . You authorized this agency to pay for all that promotion, and we dont even have the account . do you know how much this is going to cost us . Do you . stephens come back here stephens and witchcraft can get you out sam, its no use. Im going to spend the night at the club. You dont belong to a club. Ill join one. Darrin, now, listen. I placed your ads your ads they were wonderful. Madame maruska was wrong, and you were right. Sam, i know you meant well you always mean well im almost used to your mothers meddling. After all, shes supposed to be a colossal pain. Shes a motherinlaw well, thats just too much. It is just too, too much darrin. Goodbye, sam. [ doorbell rings ] you son of a gun you old son of a gun youre wearing two coats. I know. You want to tell me how much money i cost the company. Well, dont worry about it ill see you get every penny back wait a minute [ chuckling ] wait a minute. And hes worried about a few measly thousand. Uh, larry, what happened . What happened . You wheelerdealer. Placed madame maruskas ads in the paper even though we didnt have a contract and it paid off. It paid off . Mr. Innocent, huh . Why, an hour after those ads hit the paper, every chain store in town was on the phone to madame maruska, doubling their lipstick orders. Dont play fair. Use madame maruskas lipstick. The ads worked. Worked . Why, im on my way over to her salon right now with the contracts for her complete line. And you did it, fella. You really did it two coats, huh . Maybe ill try that. The ads worked. She signed up the entire line. Sweetheart, it was your ads that did it. Sam, it was still witchcraft you did it. I could have been that office boy if id had as much faith in my work as you did. It doesnt matter. Even if i should have done it, you did it, and you shouldnt have done it. Even if i should have. Done it. That doesnt make any sense. I know it doesnt. I just want you to forgive me, and i dont know how to ask. [ chuckles ] you dont have to ask. [ yawns ] im beat. Good night, sweetheart. Good night, sweetheart. Mmm oh, darn. Its going to be chilly, it dont run up and down the stairs. Oh, thank you, sweetheart. Thats very nice of you. Well, im not going to do it. You know. Why, darrin, im shocked you said in this case ill make an exception at least until i can afford an upstairs maid. Thank you. [ tinkles ] all done. Oops. My turn. Darrin oh. Oh you still here . Ca i think so although around here, you can never be sure. Yes, im still here. [ chuckles ] i mean, arent you gonna be late for the office . Mmhmm. You mean just cause larrys away, youre gonna take advantage of it . Anyway, i dont have anything important on my schedule until tomorrow. Hmm. [ clattering ] hey what was that . If i am not mistaken, it is not a what. Its a who. Oh, boy. Oh [ chuckles ] step down. Oh, are you all right . Yes. How nice of you to drop in. Aunt clara, if you ever want to try here, let me take your bag and your brolly. Come around here and sit down. Uh, here, aunt clara. Youre welcome anytime. You want some coffee . Oh, well, thank you. Now, thank you. Ah. Safe and sound. Oh, dear. Would you like part of the paper . Oh, no, you keep that yourself, and ill just, uh, zap up one for myself. [ chuckles ] oh, dear. Now, lets see. Bubbling bubbling potion, uh, secret rhyme, e morning heraldtimes. [ ding ] isnt isnt today friday . Aunt clara, were going to have to have a little talk. I simply cannot yes, it is. [ stammering ] oh, look. This is tomorrows paper. Fine. But just let me finish. I just want to find the sports section, you know. Since when have you been interested in sports . If this is tomorrows newspaper, then it will have todays racing results. So im going to, um, pick a horse. And put something on its tail. Thats nose. Let me see. Sam well. Isnt larry tate your boss . Yes, but that doesnt have anything to what about him . It says he broke his leg. What . Yes, yes. There it is right there. Larry tate, president of mcmann tate, breaks leg. Oh, no. Oh, dear. Id send him a getwell card, but this is tomorrows newspaper, and it hasnt happened yet. On this weekend of all weekends he and louise were going on their second honeymoon. Honeymoons are such fun, especially when you have someone with you. Well, what . Sam, weve got to get to larry. We cant. They made sure that no one would know where they were going. So what . You can find him. How . You know. Darrin, are you suggesting that i use witch yes, i am. Sam, my boss and one of my best friends is about to break his leg. We can prevent it. Oh, hold it. Hold it. We can prevent it . You can zap us to wherever they are, and we can prevent larry from breaking his leg. Yes to part one, but im doubtful about part two. Darrin, its dangerous fooling around with the future. Well just have to take the risk. Sam, were wasting time. Lets start twitching us . Were partners, huh . Sam all right. All right. Aunt clara . Uh, yes . Uh, dear, darrin and i have to go out for a while. Dear, yes. Thank you. Well, here we go. [ ding ] here, darrin. Hang on, hang on. You ready . Mmhmm. Darrin, are you sure yes all right. Eyes that see all, gentle winds, take us to where our search begins. Oh, i wish i could do that. Now, let me see. How does it go again . Eyes that see all, gentle winds, take me to where my search begins. [ ding ] [ tinkles ] you tell your Insurance Company they made a mistake. The check they sent isnt enough to replace your totaled new car. The guy says they didnt make the mistake. You made the mistake. I beg your pardon . He says, you should have chosen fullcar replacement. Excuse me . Let me be frank, he says. You picked the wrong insurance plan. Well replace the full value of your car plus depreciation. Call 18447564653. And if you have more than one Liberty Mutual policy, you qualify for a multipolicy discount, saving you money on your car and home coverage. Call Liberty Mutual for a free quote today. At 18447564653. Thats 18447564653. What did i tell you . Isnt this place the greatest . Oh, its wonderful, larry. And the best part of it is, not a single solitary soul knows where we are. Everything all right, mr. Tate . Oh, perfect. You run a great place here, mr. Murray. Youre very kind. [ ding ] ive got to stop hitting that brandy after dinner. You know, youve really got marvelous legs, louise. We got to find a way to show them more often. Oh, you are the most charming liar ive ever known. Darrin, do you really have the heart to intrude on a scene like that . Wed better intrude, and fast. Can you think of a better way to break a leg than on a Badminton Court . How are you gonna explain our being here . Im not. Im gonna put them on the defensive. Come on. Darrin samantha okay, you two, who told you we were here . What . You blabbed. Oh, nno, ii tell the truth, louise. Samantha told you, right . Oh, nno. I had no idea. Its okay. If youre here, youre here. We know you want your privacy as much as we do, so you respect ours, well respect yours. Right, sam . What . Oh, right. Well, well see you around or, rather, we wont see you around. Now, wait a minute. What are you doing up here . Uh, im here on business, in a way. What kind of business . Larry, you came up here to relax and enjoy yourself. Here you are, worrying about the office. Forget about the office. Hes right, dear. Come on. Lets go play badminton. Come on. Okay. Darrin uh, wait. Uh, thats no way to relax and enjoy yourself. Its so physical. Youll get all tensed up. Now, look, darrin sweetheart, its their vacation. Thank you. Larry [ tinkles ] [ gasps ] honey, that was marvelous larry, that was great watch it oh, uh, sunburn . No, just burned. I didnt know you were a gymnast, larry. Neither did i. I dont know. How about you kids . I asked you first. Larry, i feel a little done in. Why dont we just go to our room and relax. By ourselves . Thats a good idea. Did you hear that . Its okay with samantha. I hope you people dont feel were deserting you. Oh, no. Im thrilled. Well. What could possibly happen to him in their room . Sam, 80 of all accidents happen indoors. Miracle of miracles, theyre not following us. Quick the skateboard get rid of it. [ ding ]. Yet. Whew. There, you see . If we werent here, he wouldve taken a header. If we werent here, hed be looking where he was going. Come on. You know, i hate to admit it, but youre right about darrin. He is awfully thickskinned. And hes got a skull to match. Wait, larry. Hmm . This is our first real honeymoon, you know. Yeah, id almost forgotten. So . So youre supposed to carry me over the threshold. Hmm. Darrin, this is ridiculous. I am not going to stand here and peep. Why . Theres no law that says there certainly is, and im just not. [ ding ] here we are, alone at last, to coin a. Oh, no of all the colossal look out for the coffee table aah are you crazy . Oh. Hi, louise. A little fast teamwork, and we avoided an accident. Darrin, would you do me a favor . [ ding ] oh, oh. Oh, you scared me out of a years growth. Oh. Hows everything going . Oh, fine, just fine. Im just warming up a bottle. Oh, good. And when the baby wakes up from her nap, im going to warm a bottle for her, too. Fine. Oh, aunt clara, are there any messages . Oh, yes, yes. Im glad you reminded me. Yes, um, darrins secretary phoned and said the 2 00, um, appointment tomorrow has been changed to, uh, 3 00 today. Oh and its 1 00 now i better get back to darrin. Kiss tabitha for me. [ ding ] thats one thing i can do. Why dont you lie down and take a nap, dear . Im not spending all this money to sleep. Is he still there . Like he was nailed to the ground. I dont see her, though. Or an escape hatch. [ ding ] ive got to get a complete checkup. I think i will lie down. The meetings been changed to 2 00 today . Are you sure . Positive. It has three ts in it. What . Oh, well, just a little joke. Anyway, im glad. I think weve made pests of ourselves long enough. Shall we go . Larry wont be out of the woods till midnight. Now, i. Im going, but you stay here and keep your eye on larry. Dont let him out of your sight. Im ready for takeoff. [ ding ] oh, and honey, see if you can land me near the water cooler. Im thirsty. Oh, yes, a complete checkup. And the sooner, the better. Larry. Huh . Samanthas out there alone now. You dont see darrin . Unhunh. Then i have a perfectly terrific idea. Larry . I know it looks as if were intruding on your vacation, and, well, i just want you to know i feel terrible about it. That makes two of us. Excuse me. Larry . Um, i wanted to say that things arent always what they seem. And i think you ought to know that you have a very valuable friend in darrin. Anything else . No. Fine. Excuse me. Ooh. Now what . I could make myself invisible. Ooh. Samantha, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Darrin, i dont know if that meetings over or not, but youve got to come back. About bringing you in from out of town. Thats perfectly okay. But i am kind of anxious to get back, though, so if you gentlemen will excuse me, ill be going. Goodbye. Goodbye. [ ding ] oh, stephens. You know, when he says hes going, he really goes. You know it. You nothing like a good steam, huh . For your information, i didnt have to come here to get steamed. Now why dont you and samantha get lost . Well, larry, thats not a very nice thing to say. You make it sound as though weve been pests. Oh. Do i . Well, have we . Oh, whats the use . Well, in that case, let me make up for it. Dinner tonights on me champagne, the whole bit. What do you say . I tell you, ive had it up to my eyeballs. I wont stand for any more. Well, i dont blame you, dear. Louise, were going to be alone, even if it means the end of our friendship. Oops. Yeah. All right. One black tie coming up. La [ ding ] what i need is a vacation. In some other hotel. Well, what are you going to say to them . Simply going to say [ knock on door ] ill show you what im simply going to say. Please, dear, be calm. Hmm. Aha. Hi, there. Hello. I just thought wed get a little head start on dinner. Uh, darrin, samantha, were not going to have dinner with you. Was that calm enough . Not that we dont appreciate it, but, well, we just cant. Oh, we understand. Dont we, darrin . Of course we do. In that case, well go dutch. Thats not what i had in mind. Well, then, if you insist, you pick up the tab. Darrin, im going to make something clear to you or die in the attempt. We want to be alone. Oh you do understand . Right, louise. Then well have dinner served right here. Darrin, does a house have to fall on you . We want to be alone, with each other, without you. This is supposed to be a honeymoon, not a a tourist attraction. Well, we honeymoon . You mean second honeymoon, dont you . No, samantha. This is our first. But i dont when we started to have one 10 years ago, i broke my leg. You broke your leg 10 years ago . Louise to the day, in fact. Are you thinking what im thinking . I think im thinking it. [ ding ] [ gasps ] tomorrows date, 10 years ago. Ill have to have a little talk with aunt clara. Forget about aunt clara. How do we get out of this . You couldnt freeze them permanently, could you . Oh, darrin, dont be ridiculous. Well, you got us into this. Get us out. I got us into this . Well, lets not stand here bickering. Do something. Well, how about yes. Yes, its the only way. Whatever it is, sam, do it, do it [ ding ] [ thunder crashes ] where did you send them . Back to this morning, when they arrived. But shh. Here they come. Wed better get lost. Come on oh, its perfect i thought youd like it. Well, here we are. There you go. Thank you. Hey, look at this. Oh, sam, the champagne wonder who sent the champagne. For a fun evening samantha and darrin. You told them where we were going. I did not. Well, then, how did they know . Whats the difference . It was very sweet of them. As a matter of fact, larry, i was thinking it might have been kind of fun to have them along. Yeah. Yeah, it might have been. Well, if thats the way they feel darrin. A house does have to fall on you, doesnt it . Sweetheart. I got to run. With larry still on his honeymoon, ive got double duty at the office. I hope he doesnt remember our being there yesterday. He might hold it against you for some of the things you did. What happened to us . Well, anyway, i learned a lesson never fool around with the future. And i learned one, too if you want a newspaper, go to the corner store. I hope youll remember that, aunt clara. Hope so, too. Bye. See you tonight, honey. Mmhmm. [ ding ] [ ding ] oh. Oh, samantha, i wish i had your flair. [ ding ] whats this . [ ding ] [ chuckles ] [humming] alfred, what are you doing . Oh, im, uh, packing these books. Uh, im bringing them on our vacation. Well, you might as well unpack them. Unpack them . Were not going. Going . The rolling waves. Oh, amanda, what are you talking about . Darling, the rolling waves were all set to sing at my charity bazaar, and now theyve canceled out. Well, why would they do that . Because they were mobbed in indiana, and one of them is in the hospital. Oh, i hope its nothing serious. Nothing serious . Alfred, i have to find another group to replace them, darling. And thats why we cant go on our vacation. Amanda. Do you mean to tell me, because a rolling wave was mobbed in indiana . Im sorry, dear. Yes. Well, you cant be serious. Darling, now look. Im the chairman of the entertainment committee, correct . Yes. And i discovered the rolling waves. Well then, darling, its up to me to find another group to replace them. How long will that take . I dont know, dear. Im working on it now. [sighs] amanda, the general knows im going on my vacation. All the boys at the Officers Club know im going on my vacation. Im sorry, dear. Oh, well. Ill try to find some excuse. Oh, amanda. Dont let anyone know that ive cancelled my vacation because of the. Rolling waves. Oh, im sorry, dear. But after all, darling. Major nelson. Oh. Would you mind telling me what youre doing . Sir, im im just practicing. Im im going on my vacation tomorrow. Well, i wouldnt count