Wizards. But a possible trap game as they got a lowly Brooklyn Nets team friday night. Off the defense, nifty move. Beautiful shot. Then the wizards defense coming up big again. And this would lead to a nice offensive play. Brandon jennings the allyoop. And guess what congrats to the wizards officially clench a playoff. [ cheers and applause ] yeah standing ovation. Well done. Thanks, frank. Be right back. vo love. I got it. I gotcha baby. Re needed most. Love is knowing. Hes the one. vo . It was meant to be. And love always keeps you safe. Were fine. vo love is why we built a car you can trust. Now and for a long time to come. The allnew Subaru Impreza sedan and fivedoor. A car you can love no matter what road youre on. The Subaru Impreza. More than a car, its a subaru. Stand by for this genius alert. Social media has been buzzing over this young man who decided to enjoy his morning pancakes with a side of exhaust. Sitting in the middle of a busy road in lakeland, florida. Digging into a plate of pancakes, eggs, and bacon. Callers to 911 were on the one hand amused on the other hand agitated. Theres a gentleman sitting in the middle of the road eating. Just eating. In the middle of the crosswalk in the middle of a green light eating pancakes. Yeah weve just received a call on that. That was a little unusual. It aint unusual, theyre fools. In other words just another day in florida. Thank you. I lov yeah. Well heres the thing it looks like Police Tracked him down and cited him for placing an obstruction in the roadway. Not sure if that was the folding table or the pancakes. But he was disturbin free flow of traffic and he said he did it as a prank. Whos surprised it was florida . Not me. Hope you have a great weekend. Good night. Captioning sponsored by cbs cheers and applause announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight stephen welcomes hugh jackman. Condola rashad. And musical guest flaming lips. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york ci, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause theme song playing stephen hey nice to see ya. cheers and applause hey, everybody welcome to the late show whoo cheers and applause thats awfully nice. audience chanting stephen thats lovely. Welcome to the show, everybody please, sit down. Please. Well, folks, welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause big news cheers and applause big news today out of the kremlin im sorry, i misread that white house. Heres the deal, yall you know how theres all this smoke about the idea that trump and his folks colluded with the russians to influence the election . And the trump people are saying, like, theres nothing to see here. . Well, i spy with my little eye, the attorney general of the united states. laughter because it turns out, Jeff Sessions spoke with the Russian Ambassador twice during trumps campaign. Even though, at his confirmation hearing, sessions was asked this by senator al franken about reports of collusion these documents also allegedly stated, there was a continuing exchange of information during the campaign between trump surrogates and intermediaries for the russian government. If there is any evidence that anyone affiliated with the Trump Campaign communicated with the russian government in the course of this campaign, what will you do . Senator franken, im not aware of any of those activities. I have been called a surrogate at a time or two in that campaign and i didnt have not have communications with the russians. audience reacts Stephen Franken didnt even ask if you were involved why did you volunteer to lie . southern accent well, id be happy to answer your question, senator. But first, let me stand on this rickety chair next to this full bathtub and please, hand me that toaster, if you will. Perhaps an english muffin or two down in here. What was your question again . piano riff cheers and applause no, officer, i did not see who stabbed the gentleman. By the way, as a young man, my name was stabby jack, but these days i control my thirst for blood with pure Old Fashioned stranglin. What was the question again . laughter now, the russian guy that he spoke to is sergey kislyak, the same Russian Ambassador that Michael Flynn talked to before he got the old kislyak of death. laughter now, sessions office had an explanation they say that sessions didnt lie. They say he wasnt meeting kislyak as a surrogate. He met with the Russian Ambassador in his capacity as a member of the Armed Services panel. Honey, i wasnt having sex with her as your husband. As a member of the Armed Services panel. Totally different. cheers so now, folks on both sides applause big humping fans. Huge humping fans here tonight. One imagines. Now, both sides of the aisle have called on sessions to recuse himself from any russian investigation, and this afternoon, sessions agreed. I have recused myself in the matters that deal with the Trump Campaign. Stephen you called yourself a campaign surrogate. Then, you lied under oath that you never met with the russians. So you dont have to recuse yourself because youve already bleep yourself. cheers and applause now we dont have to bleep that, right . We dont have to bleep that. Jon there you have it. Thats how it goes. Stephen and we probably wouldnt even know this much about the Trump Campaigns russian connections if it werent for some lastminute work by the Obama Administration according to a new report cheers and applause according to a new report, obama officials fought to preserve evidence of Russian Election meddling. Its a good idea. Though i do believe there is one large piece of evidence sitting in the oval office right now. laughter the obama folks were worried this is why they did it. The obama folks were worried that after trump took office, the intelligence could be covered up or destroyed. Yes, trump could bury it where the public would never see it maybe with his taxes. laughter it was all an effort to leave a clear trail of intelligence for government investigators. Oh, oh, its a scavenger hunt, with clues hidden throughout the government the movie National Treasure is finally coming true nicolas cage, quick, check the back of the constitution. I knew it Vladimir Putins phone number cheers and applause piano riff i knew it was Something Like that also, also maybe check the front theres some writing on that side thats pretty damning to trump, too. cheers and applause now, congress has finally started its russia investigation, with House Intelligence Committee chairman devin nunes saying, on a bipartisan basis, we will fully investigate all the evidence we collect and follow that evidence wherever it leads. Well, bring a flashlight because its pretty dark up putins butt. laughter you know, one of these things. laughter mr. Trump echoes laughter now, things are battery will go down unless you turn it off. laughter things are getting serious because the white house staff has been told to preserve all russiarelated materials. So you hear that, mr. President . Dont get that mattress steam cleaned yet. audience reacts speaking of jon whoa stephen yeah, i like that joke, too. laughter speaking of donald trump, while his attorney general was going up in flames trump was down in virginia, addressing the military in newport news. Or as he calls it, newport fake news. Trump was on the deck of the brand new carrier, u. S. S. Gerald ford, and he debuted a new look. You know, they just gave me this beautiful jacket. They said, here, mr. President , please take this home. I said, let me wear it and then they gave me the beautiful hat. And i said, you know, maybe ill do that. I have no idea how it looks. Stephen like grandpa just stepped out of the changing room at the Army Surplus Store . cheers and applause just, what do you think . What do you think . applause you buy it . laughter trump proved right away that he it really feels like a place. You stand on that deck and you feel like youre standing on a very big piece of land, but this is better than land. Stephen congratulations. laughter youve just described a boat. laughter and applause its like land its like land its like land on water. But its dry. Its like a hotel, but its on its side, its not sinking, and theres no room service. The worst. laughter and as befits the commander in chief, trump went out of his way to compliment the men and women in uniform. Our navy is great, our navy is great. Our people are great. Great. laughter and applause stephen your vocabulary, on the other hand, could use some work. But everything else, great. Now, say hi to jon batiste and stay human, everybody cheers and applause band playing cheers and applause stephen wow, this russian thing is developing so fast. So fast. Its a new thing every day. And heres the crazy thing, it is only getting out in the public because of white house whistleblowers. No one knows who these people are. cheers and applause and donald trump is getting very frustrated, and he thinks he may have found the source of these leaks. I think that president obama is behind it because his people are certainly behind it, and some of the leaks possibly come from that group. Leaks. I mean, hed have to be in trumps inner circle. We have a picture of trump with his cabinet, dont we . Okay, now pull out, jimmy . Ahha jon yeah yeah laughter stephen hes so clever. But this is great news for me, because if trump thinks the leaks are coming from obama, then he hasnt caught on to my supersecret source inside the white house. Which means its time for anotr edition of late show president ial leakrets. cheers and applause stephen welcome to late show president ial leakrets. Now, im about to speak with my supersecret source, high up in the trump administration. To protect his or her identity, we have dimmed the lights, and put him or her behind a screen. Hello, stephen. Stephen well, im glad your voice is still disguised. Me, too. The machine has two settings now. It has this low mode, or. I can switch it to a jon batiste setting. Stephen wow. That laughter and applause that really sounds like jon. Yeah where ya at, yall . Hoo laughter stephen so, tell me. Tell me, anonymous source, what is the mood of the white house right now . Well, you know the phrase whistling past the graveyard . Stephen yeah, ive heard that. Its like that, but no whistling. laughter its just all graveyard. Stephen so, theyre pretty upset about this Jeff Sessions news . Well, a little. But mostly theyre upset about ty breaking up. I mean, it doesnt get any more romantic than naked paddleboarding. And we all know, Orlando Bloom has quite the paddle. laughter stephen okay, but its clear now, sessions met with the Russian Ambassador twice before the election, but that he denies discussing the campaign. How deep do sessions ties with the russians go . Oh, really, really deep. Russia is, of course, the home of the enchanted tree, where sessions and his family bake all those cookies. laughter his code name is e. L. Fudge. Stephen how do you know that . Lets just say, a little bird told me. laughter comrade comrade cheers and applause stephen well, any idea of where trump goes from here . At this point, Everybody Knows theyve got to appoint a special prosecutor. Stephen okay, who will that be . Well, theres a lot of names floating out there, but right now, its been cut down to either former solicitor general ted olsen, or trumps choice, matlock. laughter stephen hed be good, he would be really good. Now, this sessions business is overshadowing trumps very well reviewed address to congress. Did the president write his speech himself . No, that speech was written by having a thousand monkeys type for a million years. Stephen so steve bannon didnt have any input at all . I didnt say that. Bannon brought the monkeys over from breitbart. Theyre white supremachimps. Stephen now, there are rumors that different factions are fighting in the white house, is that true . Yes, in fact, theyre fighting in the pit that trump had installed under the oval office. This morning, Kellyanne Conway gutted an intern with Reince Priebus sharpened femur. Stephen wait, wait, does that mean Reince Priebus is dead . Only the first one. His clones are fine. Stephen well, can you tell us why the president still refuses to release his taxes . Hes just a really modest guy and doesnt want people to know about the millions of dollars he gives to charity every year. Stephen i would never have guessed that. Because its not true. Its all the russia stuff. He claimed putin as a dependent. Isnt that right, little bird . Da bird attacks cheers and applause stephen anonymous source, everybody well be right back with hugh jackman. cheers and applause save on musthave trends. s pair pleats withem a finine top find your perfect Bomber Jacket and pick up an offtheshoulder dress. Plus, get 10 off when you spend 75 or more and get kohls cash too. Kohls. So tasty. And were gonna get the phone i his phone,ry sorry. Uh out of you. As soon as [ringtone] [ringtone] i have to, i have to take this. Just a little pinch. Sweetheart, i left my phone insi [inaudible muffled voice] im having phone. Issues. Bye uh, were gonna fix this, needless to say. [voiceactivated doubletone] okay. Resuming play. Oh mickey what a pity you dont understand snickers® satisfies. Windex that you dont even know its there . So clear by sfx slide show smudge it with the new smudge stick even clear glass gets visibly smudged in a snap. Sfx smudge sounds against glass get it now and say no to spotless clear windex glass. Starting at 12. 99, at olive garden. Come for an irresistible meal here, and leave with a great meal too. So you can enjoy family time one more time. Buy one take one, only for a limited time. At olive garden. cheers and applause stephen welcome back, everybody ladies and gentlemen, my first guest tonight is a golden globe, emmy, and Tony Award Winning actor, and just a lovely fellow. His most impressive hardware is his adamantium claws, and hes wearing them one last time, in logan. Whos this . Its the guy telling you to get back in your nice truck and go play oaky dickhead somewhere else. Hey, carl. Looks like he hired some muscle. Looks that way. Hes a friend of mine. Friend with a big mouth. I hear that a lot. You probably hear this, too. gun racked more than id like. Then you know the drill. Im going to count to three, and youre going to start walking away. I have rights in this country. One. I have a lawyer now two. Three. Ah, ah you all right, boss . breaks gun you know the drill. Now get the hell out of here. Stephen please welcome hugh jackman cheers and applause thank you, man stephen you just did you just did the real movi whats that . Stephen i have noticed this. I have noticed this over the years, is that movie stars have a slightly different entrance than everybody else. Oh, really . Stephen yeah, they always, they take a moment, stand right over there, and they address the audience first. Patrick stewart did the exact same thing. Did he really . Stephen exactly, and uma thurman did the exact same thing, yeah. Youre a true movie star. Thats it. This is it. Ive made it. I mean, thank you. cheers and applause i have to thank you, publicly. Stephen what did i do . We hosted an event just over a year ago in central park stephen oh, i have a picture of it i was going to talk about it. This is yes, this is r. C. S. Stephen exactly, this is global citizen. Light as a feather, by the way, light as a feather. Stephen right, we cohosted, and you had a long trench coat on your shoulders. I came out for our second segment from way stage left, only to discover my eyesight has got that bad that i couldnt read anything. And under my breath, i said i cant read it and you said, what . , and i said, could you read it all . And so i stood there the entire time while you covered for me. Thank you stephen youre welcome. And i now have contact lenses, so thank you for that. Stephen i got your back, you yeah. laughter stephen well, the thing about this, the thing that i find very humbling is that we rehearsed this once we met at some rehearsal studio in the city. We rehearsed this once, and i got on his shoulders, and, and, i was afraid, i dont know why, that i was going to hurt your shoulders by sitting on them. But when i got off, i limped away from being on your shoulders. And my wife, our wives were there, and my wife said, are you telling me you hurt your leg from sitting on his shoulders . laughter it was really humbling. It was really humbling. applause thank you. Stephen now, what happened here . Did you get cut with the adamantium claws or something . Yes, i have hit myself many times over the years. But this is a basal cell carcinoma, which is the least dangerous form of skin cancer. Very common for aussies to have. But everyone should be aware dont be like me. Wear sunscreen, get checkups. But im all fine. Its all out. Stephen all right, okay. cheers and applause just too much time at the beach . Yeah, and english parents. We didnt know about the ozone layer. I think there was something about sunscreen. I dont ever remember my parents putting it on me. Maybe they did. Stephen oh, no, we rubbed oil on ourselves, as kids. There was a lot of that. Like, get burned, peel, two or three times beginning of summer and that was your base. Youre ready to go, mate. Stephen exactly. It would toughen you up, and then at the end of your life, they would just peel you, and make you into a book. laughter now, i heard you were 13 when you first decided you were going to make a life in the theater. Oh, wow. Stephen okay, is that a true story . Kind of. My father was converted by billy graham at a revival before i was born. So i was brought up in the church, and we went to a revival meeting. And i was about 13 and i remember looking up at this minister i think he