First things first, the sex cards have got to go The first Witcher game is peculiar. It’s clunky even by 2007 standards, with strange, point-and-click combat, shallow characters and dialogue, and very little shared DNA with its more successful sequels. I played The Witcher for the first time last year (thank you, pandemic backlog). While the combat is jarring, there’s plenty of promise in its story. With a generous dose of TLC to bring it up to the standards of a modern game, it would make for a great adventure, especially for the 50 million-odd Witcher fans who haven’t had a major new game to play in this influential series since 2016. This got me thinking – what if CD Projekt Red did exactly that? How would a Witcher 1 remake look in 2021?