Suliana Kaota could hardly recognise herself as postnatal depression took over.
Photo: RNZ / Claire Eastham-Farrelly
Warning: This story includes verbal abuse scenes and discusses suicide.
Suliana Katoa is at home in Tāmaki Makaurau with her three children, watching
Coco the movie, when she considers suicide.
It is raining hard. Suliana s husband and parents have just headed off to ako hiva (church choir practice).
She grabs a basket full of washing to fold on her bed. She glances at her newborn lying peacefully in his cot and her eldest daughter, who is cuddling a bowl of popcorn.
Suliana spies her two-year-old son sitting on the floor with his milk and cookies.
Suliana has one eye on the load of washing and one eye on her son as he dances near his glass of milk. She repeats herself, Watch out, son. Your drink is on the floor. But he carries on moving from one end of the bedroom to the other, eyes glued to the TV screen.
She folds the washing, robotically, as her mind drifts away, thinking of what a difficult week she has had mentally. Nobody cares about me. I feel like a failure as a mother. I don t know what I m doing as a mother. I m not good enough. Why can t my family and friends be considerate of how hard I m working? Looking after three kids is so hard, she thinks.
Suliana Kaota could hardly recognise herself as postnatal depression took over.
Photo: RNZ / Claire Eastham-Farrelly
Warning: This story includes verbal abuse scenes and discusses suicide.
Suliana Katoa is at home in Tāmaki Makaurau with her three children, watching
Coco the movie, when she considers suicide.
It is raining hard. Suliana s husband and parents have just headed off to ako hiva (church choir practice).
She grabs a basket full of washing to fold on her bed. She glances at her newborn lying peacefully in his cot and her eldest daughter, who is cuddling a bowl of popcorn.
Suliana spies her two-year-old son sitting on the floor with his milk and cookies.
There s no shame : Pasifika mum urged to get help for depression rnz.co.nz - get the latest breaking news, showbiz & celebrity photos, sport news & rumours, viral videos and top stories from rnz.co.nz Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday newspapers.