Downs, and i am delighted that we got to see him walk out in handcuffs. he has been such a powerful force in our lives, and i think once we saw that there was justice and that he was really going to be treated just like any other criminal, there was this feeling of lightness that i don t think any of us realized how heavy we really felt all that time. what s it been like to carry this around with you for 40 years or more? well, at first it was horrible. it set me on a self-destructive path. it walked away from an album of my own songs. i lived in a dirt-floored garage for nine months. i drove really fast around curves. i was suicidal. then i tucked it away and had a life and babies. ....