Front of the children, never screaming out the word no to them, i never wanted to tell my kids no. i wanted to tell them that i wanted to show them that there were options. you don't have to stick the coat hanger in the electrical socket, you know, saying no is an abrupt thing but to talk to them and say if you understand the repercussions of something then you won't go there. so maybe think about this as opposed to this. give this some thought, you know. but that will clearly -- that could kill you, so i would ease them away from things of that