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Dear Care and Feeding, My grandfather died this year. He and I were very close, and I am still grief-stricken. He took me in when my parents kicked me out—because I was gay—when I was teenager. I believe he saved my life, honestly. I am eternally grateful to him. Advertisement My wife and I moved him in with us a few years ago when he became too ill and frail to live alone, and I’m so glad we had that time with him. He adored my wife and was keen to help financially with our attempts at getting pregnant (plans that are currently on hold due to my state of mind). Indeed, finances are whe...

Parenting advice on adoption, foster parenting, and asexuality.

Dear Care and Feeding, I recently got engaged to a man who has two children from his prior marriage. The children are 7 and 9 and my fiancé has them part of the time, but they spend the majority of their time with their mother. At the beginning of our relationship, my fiancé set clear expectations: he wouldn’t introduce me to the children unless our relationship became serious; if it did, he would be making all parenting decisions. He said he’d had difficulties with his ex-wife around the issue of parental decision-making, and the conditions he set for us seemed reasonable to me.

Parenting advice on racism, hair color, and adoption.

Dear Care and Feeding,  My husband and I both come from families of heavy drinkers, something I would say is a part of our respective cultures. Throughout our childhoods and to this day, beer, wine, and vodka flow freely at our family’s homes. My husband and I have been exceedingly careful to avoid alcohol addiction, but many of our family members are functioning alcoholics. It’s hard to tell because they’re all “regular” adults who hold down normal jobs and behave normally. But no dinner, Mass, gathering, or party is complete without cases of alcohol. Advertisement As a result of ...