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For me it has nothing to do with wearing women's clothes. i have not been in a dress for god, three months. i'm embarrassed to say that during the last three days i've felt very much apart, not as an equal participant. and that is so narcissistically self-centered, critical and judgmental. all the things my wife used to accuse me of being that i said i wasn't. that i'm slowly being outed to myself. >> i'm so honored and proud that she's my friend and that i get to introduce her today. everybody, here is susan stanton. >> when she went to the conference in chicago, she was thrust into this sea ...

Anything like that. i mean, i didn't smoke pot in high school. i never took drugs. i never went to the parties. i never did anything like that. once i got -- once the incongruity developed in my life, it was so painful to me, i started spiraling. it was just an addictive behavior. it was just like so many other addictive behavior that alcoholics deal with or other people deal with with different issues. it started becoming compulsive with me. i was so ashamed of it and so desperately wanted to manage it myself i kept it a secret. >> mike: people were angry with you. >> yes. >> mike: very angry...

Judgmental orbiter or rude or cruel toward me, i felt like that was just. but when they are kind and compassionate and thoughtful toward me in the way that will be kind and helpful to us, i consider that a gift. and so i am very grateful to it. so i don't blame at all the people that have been through that process and continue to go through the process. >> mike: gayle, when you were here before, i was really taken by your sense of serenity. you were not angry. you didn't show bitterness. i was truly amazed by the countenance of your face when you recounted that, yes, you had been hurt. yes, ot...

Anything like that. i mean, i didn't smoke pot in high school. i never took drugs. i never went to the parties. i never did anything like that. once i got -- once the incongruity developed in my life, it was so painful to me, i started spiraling. it was just an addictive behavior. it was just like so many other addictive behavior that alcoholics deal with or other people deal with with different issues. it started becoming compulsive with me. i was so ashamed of it and so desperately wanted to manage it myself i kept it a secret. >> mike: people were angry with you. >> yes. >> mike: very angry...

The campaign trail, there was a lot of criticizing of president bush and his policies. >> um-huh. >> i'm just wondering now, 12 months later, being the family in the white house, if your perspective on that has changed, in that, perhaps maybe it would have been better to be less judgmental. >> you know, i think that on the campaign trail my husband, his goal was to be truthful and honest about the problems that we faced. >> bill: okay. we didn't see a lot of her because of that dopey thing there. but you did pick up the tone of it? >> not only the tone. i mean, if you watch the initial second,...