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Marvels movies and what we do in the shadows, a phenomenal film. Tonight hes here with a new comedy in which he plays, i want to get this right, adolph hitler. Taika waititi is joining us lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets start things off talking about the miracle of life and why its so creepy. A mysterious new organism they nicknamed it the blob, a yellow unicellular small living being, looks like a fungus but acts like an animal, that is 720 sexes, can move without legs or wings and can heal itself. Two blobs can transmit knowledge to each other. Experts call it one of natures mysteries. Trevor sounds like the beginning of a horror movie. Sounds like a news report everyone in the horror movie ignores ten minutes before the blob takes over the town. What does that mean that the blob has 720 different sexes . Did the blob say that . The scientists say, what are are you pronounce . The blob says, all of them people get stressed and say the yellow blob is going to take over the world some yellow blob wont take over the planet because if it tries we have an orange blob with no brain thats going to fight it and take it down cheers and applause Big International news, egypt still has old things left to dig up. 20 ancient coffins in egypt are called one to have the most important archeological finds. They were discovered along the nile river. The coffins were stacked in a large tomb, sealed, in fact. A in tact. The colors and carvings have not faded despite being 2,000 years old. Trevor that sounds like the begin of a horror movie. Maybe theres a reason the 20 coffins were sealed so tight. Shut up and open them aaahhh a quick shoutout to the guy who owned the coffin store in ancient egypt. Can we give him props . Think about it, those coffins have lasted longer than any civilization ever. Or nate, beautiful. These days, think about it, we bury people in an apple box, basically. When they dig up our coffins in 2000 years, they will be, like, people in 2019 were some broke ass bitches laughter how much time needs to pass until its acceptable to start looting dead peoples graves . When these guys dig up coffins theyre archeologists, when i do it im desecrating the grave of luther vandross. How is that fair . laughter when youre hungry and on the go, Nothing Better than a drivethrough. Thanks to a new law in california you could get a driveover. Road kill could be on the menu. Governor gavin newsom has just signed a new bill into law, senate bill 395, would allow drivers who unintentionally fatally strike a deer, elk, wild pig, to take it home and cook it. It would allow people who stumbled on an animal carcass in the road to take it home for food. That is expected to help people in california. Trevor pem taking dead animals home . Sounds like the beginning of a great romantic comedy. She hanover his leg. He ran over her heart but, yes, eating road kill is now legal in california. Yeah, and the owners of 7eleven were, like, oh, was that illegal . My bad. My bad. And im not going to lie. This is one of the weirdest stories ive ever seen. Honestly, ive never driven past road kill and thought, oh, if only it wasnt a crime laughter i wouldnt eat a banana i found on the floor. Youre taking home a dead deer . Actually, if i wrote this law, i would have added a part that says if you kill an animal with your car, you have to eat it, but you can. You have to eat it. You see how safe the highways would become. It would be, like, honey, slow down, im not hungry, slow down. laughter to be fair to the animals, i would also add if you hit an animal but you die the animal gets to eat you. Rules are rules, people thats it for the head reasons. Moving on to our top story. cheers and applause if you were keeping up with the news today you probably know that it was more chaotic than free cocaine day at dave and busters. laughter personally, im disappointed because we had a whole show planned and i was going to be a great show. We figured out who killed jeffrey epstein, but we had to throw it all out the window because there was so much breaking news, too much news, in fact. Luckily, though, too much news is just the right amount of news for a segment we call aint nobody got time for that. cheers and applause if youre friends with a government ethics expert and youre wondering why their head randomly exploded into little pieced to, its probably because they saw this. President trump is hosting a major meeting of World Leaders next year at his miami area resort and golf property. Next years g7 summit will take place at the Trump National doral in miami. The move is raising questions about whether hosting this large event at one of the president s businesses is a violation of ethics rules. Trevor wow that is crazy. The president is making World Leaders hold a giant event at his own resort . Like it really seems theres nothing trump wouldnt do to profit off the presidency. I bet you hes going to be outside his own impeachment trial scalping ticket. He will be standing outside going, tickets, tickets, who needs tickets to my impeachment . Best seats in the house, come on, yall, right next to me. laughter if i was a world leader, i wouldnt want to stay at trumps resort. I dont trust him. Trump would probably sneak into your room to try to find dirt on joe biden. He would be at the door, like, housekeeping oh, did someone leave these files on the floor . Ill get rid of it for you laughter now, on a normal day and a normal presidency, we would spend all our time talking about how shady it is that trump is forcing World Leaders to host the g7 summit at his golf club that he makes money from, especially considering how he brags how he doesnt profit from the presidency. But today is not a normal day, and this is not a normal presidency. While hes inviting foreign leaders to his golf club, american leaders are stomping out. Shortly after a house vote more than 100 republicans joined democrats condemning the democrats withdrawal from syria, a heated clash in white house between trump and Top Democrats spilling out on to the steps of the west wing. I pray for the president all the time. We have to pray for his health. This was a very serious meltdown on the part of the president. President trump hitting back accusing of democrats of storming out using the same language as pelosi against her tweeting, she had a total meltdown in the white house today. It was very sad to watch. Pray for her. She is a very sick person. audience reacts trevor uh, okay, i know you are, but what am i . I like how when trump is insulted he steals that insult with zero shame. Like may be this is how you trick him into getting out of the white house. Im sick of you, you resign. No, im sick of you, i resign. No, damn it, wait, wait applause also, its funny how theyre fighting, but they both say theyre going to pray for each other. You know what they remind me of . They remind me of those Old Church Ladies who act nice in public but pray insult each other. They will be, like, dear lord please give me the strength not to whack this fool up side the head. And if i do, jesus, please give this woman sense before i whip her ass like the father she never had. We were going to spend our time talking about the beef between trump and democrats, but then news broke about the turkey. Breaking news in turkey, the United States says its helped to broker a five day cease fire with Turkish Forces and sir. I cant Vice President making that announcement after meeting with president recep erdogan. The president called it an amazing outcome. The kurds are very happy, turkey is very happy, the United States is very happy, and, you know what . Civilization is very happy. Its a great thing for civilization. Trevor yes, civilization is very happy. Centuries from now historians will look back at the greatest achievements of all time, the development of democracy, the invention of electricity and the time trump negotiated a really cease fire in a war he basically started. Ah, yes, what a great achievement applause its civilization and you know what . If we have the time, we would be discussing how disingenuous of trump to claim this was a peace deal when the kurds just got screwed over. The deal is they have five days to leave the land and turkey gets the land. Sounds like the deal i had with my high school bully, i give him my lunch money, he gives me a black eye, win win. While kurds are setting out of syria, the democrats are trying to get trump out of the white house and the latest witness on the Parliament Impeachment inquiry was dropping bombs. Gordon sondland said President Trump told u. S. Officials to talk directly so his personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani about u. S. Policy in ukraine, and he said he didnt know until later that giulianis agenda included pushing ukraine to investigate joe biden. And he said throughout this time he was getting ukraine to advance an investigation into corruption, he had no idea that meant joe biden or hunter biden. Trevor oh, this is slick from sondland. Hes now saying that he did put pressure on ukraine, but he didnt know it had anything to do with joe biden. You see what hes doing, hes trying to distance himself from what trump did. Hes basically, like, i didnt know it was a bank robbery, i just went in with my friends, gave the bank teller a note and they gave me the money. Why were you wearing a mas income i thought we were all cold laughter i wish we had more time to go through ambassador sondlands full testimony. He had a lot to say, Mick Mulvaney came out and held a surprise press conference and shocked everyone in the room. Following breaking news, a stunning admission from the white house. Acting chief of staff Mick Mulvaney directly contradicting President Trump on a quid pro quo with ukraine, saying hundreds of millions of dollars in u. S. Military aid was tied to an investigation of democrats in the 201 2016 election. So the demand for an investigation into the democrats was part of the reason that he wanted to withhold funding to ukraine. The look back into what happened in 2016 certainly was part of the thing he was worried about in corruption with that nation. That is absolutely appropriate. What you just described is a quid pro quo. We do that all the time with foreign policy. I have news for everybody, get over it. Theres going to be political influence in foreign policy. Trevor okay, hold up. Hold up. Trump has said on multiple occasions no quid pro quo of any kind. Now middle age harry potter is coming out saying that there was a certain time of quid pro quo, but everyone must get over it . Thats it . Just get over it . Everybody does it . So this is locker room corruption . Is that what this is . Im not going to lie. This is a tws i didnt see coming. Like the murder suspect in a law and order episode confessing in the middle of the scene, yeah, i committed the double homicide but the real question is are you going to be a little bitch about it . The person is dead, aint nothing going to change. Now are we going to eat them or not . What are we doing . applause so in 24 hours, in 24 hours, we had trump hosting the g7 at his golf club, turkey getting the greatest deal of all time, no quid pro quo but also quid pro quo, a showdown in the white house, but didnt have time to tell you rick perry tied to the ukraine scandal abruptly resigned today. This might be the true genius of donald trump. You realize with one scanned youll get kicked out of office, but with seven in one day . Aint nobody got time for that. Well be right back. cheers and applause im not going to get involved in a war between turkey and syria, especially when, if you look at the kurds and again, i say this with great respect, theyre no angels. We get along great with the kurds. Were trying to help them allot. Dont forget, thats their territory. We have to help them. I want to help them. Let them fight their own wars. We have been fighting them a thousand years. They fought with us. They died. They died. We lost tens of thousands of kurds died fighting i. S. I. S. We were the ones that got i. S. I. S. , were the ones who took a care of it, specifically me. But theyre great people. We dont forget, i dont forget. Let them work it oh baby. Cmom and say it now. Just let the words come out. Give me your love. No calories. No sweeteners. All smiles™. Bubly sparkling water. Crack a smile™. [ bi[ typing ]ng ] its not fancy night out rich. Its fancy night in rich. Lifes rich. Ritz. Owning and running the biggesta Small Business is finding the right people. In hiring our first recruiter, we decided to post a job on linkedin. They had to have worked. At a recruiter firm and be bilingual. When we saw ana marias profile. She had a ton of experience in hr. The interview went really well. And she seemed like someone who could really sell mckenzie to perspective employees. We found the best person to find the best person for us. Post a job today at linkedin. Com grow kentucky eightyfive, they said he couldnt do it. You cant just introduce your new delicious kentucky fried wings in a Football Game but, he did it. Introducing my new kentucky fried wings in a Football Game. [cheering] now available in buffalo, honey bbq and nashville hot. From the creators of rudy ii, rudy iii. Hes still Colonel Sanders but now hes got wings for sale. cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the daily show. As we just saw, the Trump Administration has been saying for weeks that there was no form of quid pro quo with ukraine, and then today mulvaney said that there was, but people should get over it. Which is likely confusing, what is the strategy . Well, here to break it all down in this whole impeachment scanned is our very own dulce sloan, everybody cheers and applause this is so confusing. Trumps chief of staff basically admitted to a quid pro quo. How is this helping them . It doesnt. But thats the point. This is what happens when youre dealing with trashass dudes and trashass fans. I have been through this before so let me break it down trump doesnt want to be president , but he doesnt want to quit either because that would make him look bad, so hes out here trying to get dumped. Its what i call pulling a marvin. Trevor pulling a marvin . Is that a psychological term . No, marvin is this dude i have been dating who wants to get out of our relationship, but hes trying to me to break up with him. Thats who marvin is, and trumps just like him. Trevor hold up, hold up, you think trump wants americans to kick him out of the white house . Its obvious he said americas just as bad as russia. He shows us the phone calls he made to ukraine, then his boy came to the podium and said hes got quid pro quo in different area codes. cheers and applause hes just like marvin. Not even trying to hide it. Marvin butt dialed me from the strip club laughter with someone elses butt if thats not asking to get your ass dropped, i dont know what is. Trevor okay, but, wait, that means this is a good thing. If trump wants out, then america just should impeach him and everyone gets what they want. Oh, hell, no huhuh impeach him to the america is the bad guy . Huhuh then he gets what he wants we cant let marvin win i mean trump. laughter excuse me. We cant let trump win. America that is to do to trump what i did to marvin. Make his life a living hell uhhuh cheers and applause i told his boss he goes to work drunk. I poked holes in his water bed. And best of all, i showed up at the strip club he was at and yesterday, that guy is broke, no more dances for marvin trevor wow, so thats how you got marvin to break up with you. Oh, no, we didnt break up. laughter were both too stubborn. Im marrying that piece of shit this weekend. laughter you hear that, marvin . You better break up with me or im taking this shit to the grave trevor congratulations, i guess. Dulce sloan, everybody well be right back cheers and applause you need to take care of yourself better. Mom is scared. Shes drinking like the pirate. Why is my life so. Uh. Oh boy. Its good luck you know. What is . Getting pooed on by a bird. Can i help . My lifes a mess. Ow. You know you can just step aside. Wheres the fun in that . Last christmas i gave you my heart you cant be in here. Were leaving. Sorry. [ laughing ] you are so strange. Oh, pete . cmon man. What . We said pantyhose right . Here, eat this. Creamy snickers. You could use a little smoothness. Pete . 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Get 4 hours of Lasting Energy to outlast your morning. cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the the daily show. My guest tonight is a filmmaker from new zealand who writes, directs and stars in the new movie jojo rabbit. That was intense what am i going to do . Honestly, no idea. There could be more of them. Hundreds of them living in your walls. How did she get control like that . She must have used her powers. Mind control. Typical see how fast she moved . Yes. Like a little female jewish jesse owens. And now shes got your fancy knife. Oh, my life yeah, a little female jesse owens jack the ripper. Were definitely in a pickle, my friend. What the do, what the do got it well blame Winston Churchill or well negotiate. Trevor please welcome Taika Waititi cheers and applause welcome to the daily show, sir. Thank you very much for having me. Trevor i am a big fan of your work. You have been making some of the funniest films that we have had the pleasure of enjoying in the cinema. Thank god. Trevor but jojo rabbit is truly one of strangest films people will watch in an amazing way. Yeah. Trevor how do you begin to pitch to a studio, hey, guys, im making a movie about a young boy growing up in gnatsia germany and his Imaginary Friend is hitler. You say, hey, guys then stop there. A very hard film to pitch. No, a film about young boy in youth for most people, they say, thats enough for me, not interested. I ended up having to write the script and let that do the talking. Its a hard thing to pitch. Totally, it shifts around a lot. A lot of comedy, and drama and tragedy and it is a real mix. Trevor it is sharp in a satirical voice as well. Youre commenting on something we know what happened but youre commenting on something i think people dont talk enough about in the world today is this n that we are conditioned from the time were children. This little child is only taught to be a nazi and we like him, because we sort of understand he had no other choice, and were seeing the conflict he has with being a nazi and his mother going, like, no, you can be a good person. Thats right, when children were indoctrinated into the hitler youth, the first lesson they were taught was to rebel against your parents. Dont listen to your parents, listen to us. Hitler is now your father. Listen to us and your teachers. If a parent in those times, you know, if you wanted to try and convince your child, dont be a nazi, it was a very dangerous thing to do, you know, because theyd say, if your parents, you know, if they judge us or if they criticize the party, tell us and well take care of that. Trevor well take care of your parents. Yeah. Trevor you see that in the story. I wish i could explain to people, it really is a weird movie in that, like, youre laughing and then youre sad and then angry and moments where youre, like, this feels like whats happening today. You feel people are radicalized and you go why do you have this hate . And they go, well, thats all ive known. Isnt it weird in 2019 someone still has to make a movie trying to explain to people not to be a nazi . applause trevor was it ever awkward for you looking in the mirror . Did your family say anything . My mother came to visit set and trevor because a lot of people dont know this about you, youre jewish. Yes. And that makes it okay laughter trevor im saying it makes it more awkward. For sure. Trevor youre going to be hitler . Theres double the guilt going on laughter so, no, i put the costume on for the first time. On paper, you think, this is going to be a great idea. Then you put it all on, put the ridiculous mustache on and look in the mirror and, really, the main way to describe it all is embarrassed. I was embarrassed. Trevor right. And but imagine trying to direct people dressed like that. Because you go through most of your day, you know, you dont really remember what you look like. And i will be directing people, hey, that was really good, scarlet, why dont we try doing another one where you go over there and and shes going and i catch a glimpse of myself and look at my reflection and i go, oh, god, i look like this guy. Then i say, you dont have to do what i say. Its not an order. Im not forcing you. Its your choice. Youre a free person. 2018, you do what you want. Trevor hey, im not directing im suggesting im suggesting the power of suggestion laughter trevor you have a really stellar cast. I mean, the young man who we see there playing jojo rabbit, hes phenomenal. All these young kids in the movie are amazing. You have Scarlett Johansson who is phenomenal as the mom. Why did you choose to center the story around the kids . Its not a story told through the lens of the i adults but through the leeps of children, why . Youve never seen films set with a backdrop of conflict or wars really from a childs point of view, and i real lewanted to explore that world, and ive worked with a lot of kids in my films, so a lot of my films they deal with, you know, young boys with dad issues. Yeah, but, so, ive always worked with these kids and the boy plays jojo, Roman Griffin davis, incredibly, beautifully sensitive young guy who really carries the film and really saved me from embarrassment. Trevor i think theres nothing to be embarrassed about. Its truly one of the most original, funny, fantastic fipples ive watched in a long time. Thank you very much for being on the show and making the movie. Jojo rabbit opens in select theatres on october 18th. Taika waititi, everybody well be right back cheers and applause this is an ad for a chip so iconic. We dont need a logo. Its the threesided crunch. You know, that cheesy, spicy, crispycrunchy, flavor packed bodega snack that rhymes with. I need those. An ad with no logo . Its another level. [ bi[ typing ]ng ] [ birds chirping ] cheers and applause trevor thats our show for tonight. Dont forget, Comedy Central standup presents new half hour specials from jaboukie youngwhite tomorrow at 11 00 and dulce sloan next friday at 11 00. Make sure you catch those. Theyre likely funny. First but first, here it is. Your moment of zen. Theres poem mitchell said many many years ago that i said sometimes 20 times a day and its very simple but its one i live by, it says, i only have a minute, 60 seconds in it, fo fod upon me, i did not choose it, but i know that i must use it, give account if i abuse it, suffer if i lose it, only a tiny little minute, but eternity is in it. And, so, i join you as we move forward to uplift not only the nation but the world. May god bless you all and may god bless america. cheers and applause spade two men in Northern California were arrested for stealing 50,000 worth of high end cheese. Who would want that much cheese . Where do you want these . Spade just put them in my office next to all the coke and weed. Ha ha ha, squeak captioning sponsored by Comedy Central squeak. applause and now david spade spade

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