Jon welcome to the daily show. Im jon stewart. My guest is on the Zach Galifianakis will be joining us. The excited news can look who is here. She made it to the show. [cheers and applause] jon a gentleman in the audience with his wife of 25 years. Only one ticket was left. Here is my impression of him at the time. I dont know her theyre boeing here together. We saved their relationship. Well, im just happy. But first its time for a daily showy bowl a update. Brought to you by arbys. Arbys. A lot of things cause diarrhea. [laughing] jon really no reason for that. All they do is send us platters of food. They are the loveliest people in the world. Lets begin in dallas where a nurse has contacted ebola from a west african patient. This morning this quaint dallas neighborhood is on high alert. Jon wait, wait. Cleaning guys . Decontaminating ebola and you have cleaning guys. Were bros with a hose not available . I shouldnt worry. They look like a thoroughly professional opportunity. Oh, look a hair pin turn, trying to slow down there goes the ebola all over [laughing] jon as of now the nurse that contacted the rare disease after close contact with the only west african carrier no our country is stable and doing well. Thats from her. Or to put that another way. Another case of ebola in america. A new case ofy bowla. Texas Healthcare Worker does havey bowla. Shocking hospital officials. Fears of ebola. Im scared again. The cdc doesnt know the point of contact. The question is how did she get it . How could she won tract ebola . Jon what is wrong with you people . [laughing] jon it was his nurse. In the ebola unit, she took care of the ebola man. [laughing] jon what do you mean how did she get was is a zoltar wish gone a rye . Did she attend a ebola tea party. Did she pee in a fountain next to ebola . For gods sake. [laughing] jon a six foot tall case ofy bowla so, we cant count on the news media to take a reasoned approach. Surely, surely their Graphic Department wont let us down. Right now 48 people are under closed watch who were exposed to duncan before he was isolated. Jon alright. Sir, the bad news you havey bowla the good news is you have a 30foot penis. Red. Anyways the disease may possibly spread from there as the latest victim has intimate contact with others. For gods sake my god its what rick santora warned us about. We sanction gay marriage and now men are giving do dogs ebola in their butts. I think they need a nineyearold in the control room saying that looks like a penis in the butt. Clearly the news anchor is having a trouble drawing the distinction of a person contracting the disease working in close contact with an ebola patient. There are experts telling us this isnt appropriate. You have to be quite close and quite intense contact to catch it. Its hard to catch ebola and hard to spread. It only is passed through bodily fluids like blood. There are isolated cases not clusters of people. Jon what do you know . Youre not a scientists. They are absent minded they dont know what theyre doing. Those guys, they say its okay find me one of those guys its really not great cause of concern. Its not easy to transmit. [laughing] [laughing] jon stetushe. Now excuse me i have to go back to the flubber jon experts are so boring. Isnt there someone technically a doctor that will validate our hihysteria. My next guest wrote a book on hysteria a outbreak of a fictional out break of ebola in america. Jon that was fiction. First the Weather Report from the writer of sharknado. We heard from experts who say this is a dangerous but manageable situation. Now the opposite of a expert. A congressman. We are once again asking the administration to reestablish a view point of stopping these flights to the United States, dallas, texas, is reeling from the problem. That needs to be handled where it is, in africa. Jon the republican from texas suggests we close africas door and hopefully they feel better. He makes a valid heartless point. Why not stop people from africa from flying here. If people cant leave the country by air and theyre sick. What do they do . They will go into other countries by land. Theyre harder to trace. Contract trace. We know thats the tried and true way to stem a out break. Jon okay. Quarantining west africa would be worst. Congress is accustomed to doing that. I am a congressman from dallas, texas, of the United States of america. Im here to speak for americans. Jon that sounds callous. [beep] yall. [laughing] jon again congressman, perhaps you were not listening. It was said that wouldnt protect americans. It would increase the raging epidemic in africa and make it harder to track them it would make it worst. Oh, my god. You know what this worst . Congress man is dealing with a fear that has gone airborne. Perhaps hes right are there other regions suffering from medical out breaks . Texas has the most number of uninsured americans in the country. More than 32,000 parents opted out of at least one vaccine. Texas refused the medicare expansion. Flu out break in texas. Mays he will out break in texas. It thousand people in texas had whooping could of. Its a epidemic in texas. [laughing] jon thrrt, texas, here is the deal. We can build the border fence you have always wanted. Were just going to do it a little tparlgter hmm. Trade in your old iphone and get a new iphone free at verizon. Did you say something, paul . Huh . No. Can i route our trip . I love our trips. Oh, me too. But no im good i know where im headed. How about music . Nah i dont really feel like just the two of us we can make it if we what a fun drive. We always have so much fun. Remember that one time we okay. Sure you loved your old iphone. But youll love your free new iphone you trade it for even more. Inwithout a wrapper. Is the gum you love, welcome to the easy life. I even got this voice over guy to finish the commercial for me. Trident unwrapped, super useful, helps fight cavities. The smartest or nothing. The quietest or nothing. The sleekest. Sexiest,. Baddest,. Safest,. Tightest,. Quickest,. Harshest. Or nothing. At mercedesbenz, we do things one way or we dont do them at all. Introducing the allnew cclass. The best or nothing. Every time you take advil youre taking the medicine doctors recommend most for joint pain. More than the medicine in aleve or tylenol. The medicine in advil is the number one doctor recommendation for joint pain. Relief doesnt get any better than this. Advil [cheers and applause] jon the big story this Midterm Election seems to be republicans winning seats. There are a few areas where democrats look good. New yorks 11th Congressional District or staten island. Why is it up for grabs . Dominick recchias exam pane ad sums it up well. Count one, lying under oergt. Count two, failing to report one Million Dollars in income. Count four. Count five. Count 20. Jon thats right 20 federal crimes related to michael grimmm. Hes charged with. Its a bit of a handicap for him. As is this accident from january when a new york 1 reporter asked grimm about the allegations. [beep] jon to be clear thats how he behaves when he knows there is a camera rolling. As if the seat wasnt recchias for the asking he out fund raised grimm over the summer. No surprise recchia was losing to the 20 count indictment grimm. This brings us to our new segment wait . One clue came when recchia was getting a schumer endorsement. Keep your eye on Chuck Schumer. Watch when schumer endorses the top of his shoes. When i was on the local school board i ran a Student Exchange program with japan for students of his district that he represents. Alright with japan. I have been to israel, italy. I have been to many, many countries across this world. Jon foreign policy. I met a Japanese Exchange student. Its all good. Schumer watch him do this oh boy. Not a good idea when Chuck Schumer doesnt want to be on camera with you. Chuck schumer he seeks out red recording lights like a sun flower growing towards the sun. [laughing] jon am i on television . This is a high profile race. Surely the party has briefed recchia on the issues . The democrat defines his possession on a massive trade agreement. Known as Trans Pacific partnership or tpp. His knowledge is unclear. What is the tpp. Were heading back inside. What exactly is the tpp . [laughing] jon to his credit no point directly threatening to throw that new york 1 reporter off the balcony he does what anyone does faced with a question, do you know what youre talking about . He snuck off to google it. A half hour later we gave the congressman a chance to answer our question. The tpp manufacture more here in america, keep jobs in america, made in america. Better for this country. Jon here is how bad the answer is. The restaurant rating in the window behind him changed grades. Thats worst than an f. They feel sorry for you. Its too bad a certain new york 1 reporter is sabotaging the campaign. When we asked recchias comment on grimm. He offered this. He has not done a lot for labor. He has a 44 percentage record on labor. My record is much better than that. A 44 percentage record from where, what do you mean. When you rate in labor he has a 44 percentage record on labor. Jon what, no . Labor, the labor place with the percents they rate you. [laughing] jon no, no. If you dont mind i have to go back inside the brick thingy with the roof. [laughing] jon so the democrats are blowing this. There is still the little manner of grimms federal charges. That came up at their debate. I pw el bet grimm wont have a very good answer for it. Everyone is entitled to their day in court. As a United States [ applause ] i will have my day in court. Jon [beep], the guy is up on 20 charges. Where are they holding this debate the home for retired Waste Management supervisors and legitimate businessmen. Ya, ya, you get your day in court. You show these guys, mikey. Maybe the prosecutor wont show up [laughing] jon either way i think we can agree the winner is new york 11. Whatever happens between now and november one of these two gentlemen will represent you in congress. Tmobiles network has more data capacity per customer than verizon and at t. Its a network that puts data where you need it most. A Network Designed Data strong. [cheers and applause] jon welcome back back our guest has a new film birdman. Its a preview. Nobody cares about a preview. Nothing matters. We are getting rid of him. I dont give a [beep] shut up, shut up listen to me for once. As soon as we announce hes taken over the advance preview. We cant afford to lose the preview, money. We cant afford to lose mike. Its about being respected and validated. Thats what you told me. Thats how you got me into this [beep] now youre the director, get them under control, okay. Jon please welcome back to the program, Zach Galifianakis. [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] jon nice to see you, young man. Thank you for having me. Jon this, this movie is such a brilliant man, the director. The performance he brings out of you. The technical achievement. Its incredible piece of work. Good, you got my text about what to say . Jon yes, im reading that over your shoulder. They text it did there. Jon and you zach, you zach are amazing right. Jon there we go. Yes, its a movie that you dont go to a lot of films where you leave and think about it for so long. I saw it last week. I its been on my mind constantly. Its one of these jon well, youre in it. Youre one of the guys in it. Is that what was did you think that guy looked like me . Ya. Jon is that what stuck with you . Ya, he looks like me. The guy in the clips. Jon ya. It is it is, it is hard to be in a movie and brag about it. It sounds gross to do that. It is, it is a great have you seen it . Jon i seen it at a festival in very thin oxygen. In tel telluride. I think i liked it i blacked out and then i was in a gondola with a bear. No, what is incredible is technically for the actor. The camera moves are astonishing. It really looks like as actors that couldnt of been easy. No. I mean the takes were sometimes up to ten minutes or fifteen. If you only have 20 seconds at the en of a take and youre not a very not very accomplished actor or or. Jon had learned your lines. Or know anything youre doing. When they hand you the baton i think even the sound guy heard me go, here they come, here they come. That kind of thing. Its its, im really proud of it. Its just kind of bizarre weird movie that everybody kind of goes would you this is bizarre and weird but wow. I hope it comes out in one theater in the United States. Only jon this theater has only one seat. You have to wait. Its in tulsa. Jon you can do it in laps. When did you go to the white house to tape between two friends with the president. I think that was laughs spring in the spring. Ya. Jon was that the weirdest thing. Did the president call you and say, zach, i like your show. Come to my house. Yes, thats exactly how it went down. Jon really . No. I think we talked to his people about jon he has people . Ya, he has two guys. [laughing] just two. Marcus and chuck. [laughing] but so, ya, i mean we i chatted with his chief of staff, valerie about it. Some how we, i ended up in the white house. Im like is this happening . Then, so before we went to interview the president i ate in the white house with his staff. The young people about eight of them. Six to eight of them. Jon they have a cafeteria . There is a restaurant in the white house. Jon is it an ashys . Arbys . I did get diarrhea. [laughing] jon theyre the noisest people. I dont know why we bring them up that way. They bring you food . Jon they bring us food all the time. Hes the nicest person in the world. The food is, i dont know okay. It hasnt hurt anyone. Everyone is happy to have it. We continue with this bizarre. It was only because alphabetically it was the first thing. I have no problem with arbys if theyre listening. [laughing] jon so, you eat with the staff. Its a restaurant. You dont have to pay. There are waiters and a dessert menu. On the dessert menu there is something called chocolate freedom. [laughing] jon no. No, there is not. Yes. Jon chocolate freedom. I say to the staff, you call the president that, right. [laughing] right . They thought i would be in trouble for saying that. They said, you have to ask him that. I was like, no. It was very, very fun. Jon i often know where these stories are going and all that. Because you figure with a comic. Didnt know that was going. There. You didnt think . Jon didnt know that was going. There so please where it went. Good, good. Jon funny, the movie is great. Youre great in it. Birdman out on friday. One theater, tusa. Tulsa. Tulsa. Jon then its rock and roll music wto dirty their hands withtrue sendeavour, not speculation. Comradeship, essential. Courageous men and women to uphold over 160 years of tradition. To celebrate the most awarded blended scotch in history. This is true scotch. Join us. The all new, head turning cadillac ats coupe. Its irresistible. Jon thats our show. Now remember tomorrow night billow riley will be here. Please enjoy a good hate watch. I know how much you like that. Here it is your moment of zen. We dont inadvertently increase the risk to people in this country by making it hard tore respond to the needs in those count rows. Making it harder for us to get assistance in. [cheers and applause] captioning sponsore