And watch the late show. Thats right, cheesy ahhh announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight. The late show super postgame supershow super. First, stephen welcomes John Krasinski and ryan gosling with a special appearance by jon stewart. Featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen hello, my friends. How are you . Nice to see you. Oh right over there. That was a fun one. That was a fun one, baby. You feel that . You feel that electricity . It can only be one thing. It is super bowl night, baby this is the night when all americans gather in front of the tv like one extended family to watch the premiere of tracker. Tracker hes a human air tag. Also the football game. And what a game it was. For the second time in super bowl history, we went to extra innings. So i think we all know the real winners were cbs ad sales. In overtime, San Francisco got the ball first and put it through the uprights for 3 points. And between the two teams, is this true . They kicked seven field goals in this game. Im sorry, but since when is football played with the feet . Then, kansas city got the ball back and would lose the game if they did not score. And you could hear sphincters snapping shut all over the midwest. [popping] but Patrick Mahomes drove the chiefs down the field for this gamewinning score. Right there, boom [cheering] come on finally. Louis hey stephen fantastic. Finally something good happened for taylor swift now, in the leadup to the game, taylors beau, travis kelce, arrived dressed like a sparkly trashbag. Oh, also before this was before the game started, right . Before the game started, Homeland Security showed a bunch of counterfeit merchandise they had seized. Okay . Which is too bad, i for one was looking forward to getting a tshirt celebrating super bowel champs the canvas city chorfs go, chorfs there was also a big betting opportunity during the commercials, and it involved retired tight end and gym teacher whose sex ed presentation just got really uncomfortable, rob gronkowski. You see, gronk has been appearing in an ad called the fanduel kick of destiny 2 where fans could place a 5 bet on whether he will make it or miss a field goal. Well, today was the big day. Gronk lined up the kick and missed wide right. Okay, its embarrassing but not as embarrassing as doing that in the helmet they normally serve ice cream in. We also got our first look at the trailer for wicked part one. Yeah yeah which is why at your super bowl party, that one nephew who doesnt care about the game suddenly started screaming and needed a minute to collect themselves. The first half did not have a lot of action. It was almost an hour into the game before we got our first glimpse of taylor celebrating a long completion by kansas city. But then the chiefs immediately fumbled, and travis kelce was seen yelling in frustration at coach andy reid. Im a pretty good lip reader, jimmy. Put that back up. I think he was saying youre embarrassing me in front of my girlfriend jeez louise you say jeez louise . Did i get that right . [cheers] even though her boy toy was angry, tayay still had some fun. At one point, she was caught chugging her beer on the jumbotron. Okay [cheering] hey, please have fun, taylor. But please make sure you have a designated driver for your private jet. Then the nfl tweeted her beer chug, accompanied simply with the word icon. If thats what makes you an icon, then my aunt rita is an iconaholic. Hi, rita [cheering] there were, as usual, there were a lot of great ads. Even Martin Scorsese directed an ad for square face squarespace. Or square face. Scorsese is the most brilliant director to do a Super Bowl Ad since Ingmar Bergmans 1984 ad for wendys. [speaking swedish] yeah, sure. Sure. [applause] sven. There was also ads featuring the biggest celebrity of all, the lord, who was featured in two spots from the he gets us campaign. And he gets us i think is so appropriate, because we all remember that quote from the sermon on the mount, ill get you. Ill get you if its the last thing i do. Your little dog, too, i think he says at one point. Language app duolingo bucked the celebrity trend with this just 5second ad. Yes, it looks weird, but his ass is now fluent in spanish. Okay, the score was 103 at halftime when we were treated to an amazing performance by usher. [cheering] the theme was help, im trapped in a jackolantern. Usher sang so many of his hits like. Who cares what he sang . Look at those abs, baby bare nipples at the super bowl halftime show . Cbs is back, baby all is forgiven [cheering] it was a great performance by usher. He was joined by some incredible artists, including alicia keyes, ludacris, h. E. R. , and lil jon. How would you rate your performance, lil jon . What . stephen i said how would you rate your performance . Okay stephen he is his own harshest critic. [applause] but. What . Maybe the biggest news from the halftime show is how little it pays to be in it, because, while it does offer extraordinary levels of exposure, the gig comes with a 0 paycheck. Uh, lil jon, your thoughts . What . stephen after halftime, the game bogged down in a slow defensive backandforth, but the big news is that verizon released an ad featuring beyonce, and moments after it aired, she announced a countrythemed renaissance part ii album. Wow, that is incredible. I cannot wait for the album to drop. Im a huge fan. But i do have to say, announcing your album during the super bowl has real getting engaged during your sisters baby shower energy. Now, the stakes were not just high out on the field. This super bowl set a record for betting, with 1 in 4 americans betting on the game. To which americans responded, one in four . I like those odds wheres the atm . No, im good. Im doing a payout. Gamblers also bet on the length of the National Anthem, with an over under of 90. 5 seconds. Now, technically, and i just found this out, betting on the National Anthem is illegal here in the united states, which is why draft kings and fanduel only allowed it for canadian bettors. Hey, canadians, bet on your own National Anthem. And take the under on how many people know the words. O canada its been one week since you looked at me is that it . Is that it . [applause] chickity china the chinese chicken you have a drumstick and your brain starts clicking gambling ads were all over the broadcast tonight. One for the Sportsbook Bet mgm featured vince vaughn, wayne gretzky, and a whole lot of tom brady. You know, after his crypto ad, you gotta respect toms dedication to helping your uncle lose the rest of his money. Now, if any of you out there if you actually really wanted to go to the game live, experts say this was the priciest super bowl ever, with some tickets on sale for 100,000. Thats a lot. But, of course, the memories will last a lifetime. Unless youre one of the players. Now, if youre upset. If youre. What . If youre upset that your team lost tonight, you might be part of a growing trend angry football fans who keep punching their tvs. This is true. Lets go to the highlights, jim. Oh, my god. [smashing] [bleep] stephen but i dont want my audience destroying the device they use to watch my show. And now you wont have to, thanks to our new sponsor. Second and 8, throw incomplete. Oh is your sports season being ruined by a loved one who cant handle it when their team loses . Tired of cleaning up shrapnel, not being able to watch your shows, and what about the cost . Theres gotta be a better way. Introducing the samsung punchable tv. The first fully plush rageresistant flat screen that is safe to punch, club, stab, knee, headbutt, slam, chew, drive over with a car or throw from a building into a dumpster. Leaving you to enjoy your leisure time in peace. Youre doing great, honey punchable tv works no matter what brings you to the game. Wheres taylor . She was supposed to be in the box with blake lively. Ahh and its not just for sports. Wait wheres niles . Its not a real reboot without niles plus, punchable tv saves you from addressing the root cause of your aggression. I wish i had more male friends. The samsung punchable tv. Because you have no male friends. I didnt say that. Shut up the samsung punchable tv. Get yours before the 2024 election. Early exit polling results. Stephen we got a great show for you tonight my guests are John Krasinski and ryan gosling. But when we come back, we might have a visit from my old friend jon stewart. Stick around. Announcer the late show with Stephen Colbert sponsored by mcdonalds. Mcdonalds best classic burgers ever. Theyre hotter. Theyre juicier. Theyre. [hamburglar] robble robble. Looks like weve been hamburgled. [hamburglar] robble robble. Ba da ba ba ba wanna know how i get this glow . i get ready with new olay indulgent moisture body wash. It smells amazing and gives my skin over the top moisture from dull to visibly glowing in 14 days see the difference with olay. Detect this living with hiv, craig learned he can stay undetectable with fewer medicines. Thats why he switched to dovato. Dovato is a complete hiv treatment for some adults. No other complete hiv pill uses fewer medicines to help keep you undetectable than dovato. Detect this leo learned that most hiv pills contain 3 or 4 medicines. 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Buckle up whoa reality checkup theres toothpaste white, and theres crest 3dwhitestrips white. Whitens like a 400 professional treatment. [pilot] prepare for nonstop smiles. Crest. So if youre happy and you know it throw you hands up and show it if youre happy and you know it, clap your hands and if you love the life youre living go ahead and dive right in and shake it, shake it like you mean it, do a little dance show me what you got oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh, oh, oh if youre happy and you know it, clap your hands [announcer] find your happiness in san diego. [cheers and applause] stephen welcome back, everybody give it up for louis cato and the late show band [cheering] louis [laughs] stephen in just a few minutes, ladies and gentlemen, just a few minutes, our dear friends mr. John krasinski and ryan gosling will be out here right there. And following the show, stick around for an allnew after midnight with our dear friend, the very talented Taylor Tomlinson will be right after this. Folks, you know, it is super bowl sunday. Weve got a huge audience, a show packed full of incredible guests, which means now is the perfect time to walk you through the recipe for my patented seven layer dip. Okay . Bottom layer cushedup florescent tubes. Now, the im sorry. I dont know what thats about. Second layer, mercury from what . Jim, what is what the hell is going on down there . [cheering] whats going on . Good to see you. Oh, my god. Its jon stewart, everybody. Look at that. Jon. Jon, hold on. Hold on. Ive got to do the thing. Jon, please. Everybody please have a seat. Jon, im doing the what are you doing here . Jon well, you know ive obviously lived under your desk ever since i left the daily show. Stephen i know that. Of course i know that, but why are are you interrupting right now . Jon well, you may have heard. There is some exciting news. Stephen exciting news . Hold on, hold on. If theres exciting news, let me just get a mouthful of water first. Mmhmm. Jon uh, starting tomorrow, im gonna be back hosting the daily show [cheering] stephen wow. I didnt know that. I just swallowed it. Yeah, i did. Thats amazing. Jon stewart hosting the daily show at 11 00 p. M. On comedy central. Were gonna watch every weeknight, right, everybody . [cheering] jon very kind of you. Actually theres one more piece of news. And you should probably take a big sip of water first. There you go. News . Jon im only doing it mondays. Stephen okay. Okay. Only mondays . Thats interesting. Jon yeah okay what . Stephen jon, you famously hate mondays and love lasagna. Jon thats garfield. Look, point is, ive got to move out of this desk and back underneath the daily show desk. I probably shouldnt have picked while you were taping. That was probably stupid of me. Stephen can i have my keys back . Jon gosh, yes. That sounds like all of them. Jon youve been awfully nice to me, thank you so much. This has been great. So this is goodbye. Stephen wait, jon, wait, no jon, no jon stop, stop. Stephen no, listen, jon. You cant just leave. No, no. Jon i have to move on, Stephen Stephen no, im fine with you moving on. I mean you cant leave until i inspect your living space. Otherwise im not giving you back your Security Deposit. Jon thats reasonable. Lets go. Stephen should i take the water with me . Jon sure, take the water with you. Watch out for the ladder dont step on the god. Thats a drop. Stephen wow, i like weve done to the place. Jon i did not do anything to the place. Stephen thats what i like. Whats that scratch on the wall . Jon those were here before. Stephen well this all looks good. I was afraid you would try to bring down one of your rescue strict no llama policy. Jon stephen, i am a grown man. Im not going to betray our trust. Bring down some llama for god sakes. Stephen i believe you. You know why . You have a book called how not to hide your llama by jon stewart. I want to read that. Jon i would not touch [alarm sounding] stephen i knew it youre not getting your Security Deposit back, stewart. Mr. Llama hider. Jon that is so not true. I was not hiding a llama. In fact, this is not a llama. This is an alpaca. Stephen oh, really . Jon do you know the difference between an alapaca and a llama . Stephen no, i dont. Jon then this is definitely an alpaca. Stephen okay, then heres your Security Deposit. Jon oh, my goodness, thank you so much. So helpful. These guys are so expensive to feed. Stephen well, i guess this really is goodbye, jon. Jon yeah. We had fun, though, didnt we . Stephen we sure did. Jon you know, there is one more thing, stephen. And its a bit of a surprise. Stephen really . You know how surprises make me thirsty, jon. Excuse me one second while i get a glass of water here and wet my whistle. Jon ready . Youre my best friend. Stephen [burbling] [crying] jon stewart, everybody. You can see him back on the daily show tomorrow. Well be right back with John Krasinski and ryan gosling. Jon both . Wow. Looking for a smarter way to mop . Try the swiffer powermop. An allinone cleaning tool, with a 360degree swivel head that goes places a regular mop just cant. Mop smarter with the swiffer powermop. Mopnext. Ter next. Stop. We got it . No. Keep going. Aga. [ sigh ] next. Next. If you dont pick one. Oh, you have time. Am i keeping you from your job. Next. I dont even know where i am anymore. Stop. Do we finally have it . Lets go back to the beginning. Are you. Your electric future. Customized. The fullyelectric audi q4 etron. vo welcome to lobsterfest. Is your party ready . Ready to attack this new lobster shrimp stack . Ready for your lobster lovers dream to come true . Theyre two of ten lobster creations, only at lobsterfest. Plus, cheddar bays for days. But lobsterfest wont last, so hurry in. I cant see you hi, im bradley cooper. Everyone is auditioning to get tmobile magenta status. 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Solid gold coffee machine. Lake making kit. Really . Can progressive cover that too . Yes, but hi its janice. Ill take 5. Is my voice on tv right now . Barista pistachio cream cold brew. Hero thanks. Friend hey its been so long. Stephen hey welcome back to our special super bowl show, everybody. Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. My first guest this evening is an actor and director you know from the office, jack ryan, and a quiet place. [cheering] he has just written, directed, and stars in the upcoming movie if. Please welcome back to the late show, John Krasinski [cheers and applause] look at that. [cheering] john my god. Wow, thats pretty good. [cheering] stephen very nice. Thank you very much. Its always just absolutely lovely to have you here. Thanks for being here. John venmo clearly works. I paid each and every one of them. Thank you, guys. That was amazing. Stephen happy super bowl. John thank you. Happy super bowl to you. Stephen thank you very much. Were enjoying our super bowl show here tonight. Did you have a chance to watch the game . John i did. Yep. Stephen how about that game . John those teams. Stephen yep. The team that had red and white in their uniform . John they just and so much. Stephen yep. It is awards season. I dont know if you know this, but those of us in hollywood, you have got the best date to this awards season this year. You and your lovely wife, emily blunt. This is the two of you. Golden globes, right . Just look radiant. Absolutely incandescent. John she sure does. Stephen shes so beautiful. John its getting a little weird. But yeah. No, yeah. Stephen a man can appreciate a beautiful woman. Thats nothing wrong. John no, theres nothing wrong. Stephen okay. Your outfit. [laughter] shes nominated for an incredible performance as Kitty Oppenheimer in oppenheimer. Did you hang out on the set . Were you there with the oppenheimer gang . John did not go to set. No, i was on the press tour for a while. Stephen why did you wink at me when you did that . John cause its away from the camera. Oh, they got it on that one. Okay. Stephen it sounds like you werent on the press tour. On the press tour for a while. John i was just taking credit for the movie when i was out there. Guys, we did it. We all did it. Chris, im so glad you listened to what i said because it worked. Stephen youre a director. John im a director. Youre british. Im not. It works. Stephen hes only half british. He grewup in evanston, illinois. John yes, that is true. Stephen the accent is completely made up. John yeah, i just realized that. When he was on the show a few days ago. Stephen yes. Did you see when he was on the show a few days ago . [bleep] [bleep] john white team, red team stephen your favorite play in the game tonight. What was your favorite play in tonights game . John oh, my god when that guy and he. Stephen oh it was good. It was good. Unbelievable. John oh, play that back in slomo. Stephen you have and im very excited about this because i saw early clips of this because im special. Youve got a new movie coming out this spring called if, which you wrote, directed, produced. And youre in it. Are you also the gaffer and the caterer . John i tried. They wouldnt let me. I did, because Imaginary Friends, theres a lot of visual effects so we didnt have actual ifs onset. Imaginary friends. So i would puppet the Imaginary Friends to the other actors. Stephen is that what this is . Theres Ryan Reynolds in the background. You holding a puppet unicorn. John thats a puppet unicorn, and thats my wife. Emily blunt is the voice stephen she is so versatile. John i know, rght . She was wearing that suit. Stephen whats going on here . John thats a pink alligator named allie. I would interact with the actors for them, like they needed that. They were like, honestly, just stand back. Its very intimidating. That is my daughters real Imaginary Friend. I wrote the movie for my kids. Oh, its very thank you. Before that, i think they thought i was an account. I was like, im going to work. And they were like yeah, right. They couldnt see jack ryan or a quiet place. So i dont think they knew where i was going. Stephen so they dont know what daddy does . John no. They do now. What happened was, id had this idea for a long time, but during the pandemic, i saw the light going out in my kids, and i saw them sort of trying to figure out life and figure what was going on. And i wrote a movie to show them that theres always hope. Theres always someone there behind you that has your back and you can always turn to. [applause] there you go. Stephen thats lovely, really lovely. John thank you. Stephen there was a teaser in the super bowl tonight. John there was. We did a fun little bit. Stephen thats a pricey little ad. I want to get you your moneys worth out of it. So i thought we would show a little bit of it again. John hey, thank you very much. Stephen jim, show the folks, please. Hi, im John Krasinski, director of the upcoming film if. Now if is a movie about. Youre not John Krasinski. Somethings happening. Hi. Hi. Hi im not going to ask you again. Put some pants on. Youre freaking everyone out. [applause] stephen i recognize a few voices. Its got a stacked cast. Obviously, emily blunt. Its got steve carell, matt damon, jon stewart, Ryan Reynolds, sebastian maniscalco. Phoebe wallerbridge, fiona shaw, richard jenkins, awkwafina, vince vaughn, Stephen Colbert. Oh, wait, thats im not in it. Im not. Thats weird. John do we have a mic . We can do a quick voiceover. No . We could. I could try to get you in the movie right now. Stephen i love you, cindy. John all right, lets go again. Stephen i didnt have an Imaginary Friend. John weve got to talk about cindy. Thats all i want to know about now. Stephen i think i am the Imaginary Friend of the girl named cindy. I just chose a child. Is there a child named cindy in this movie . John no. Stephen never too late. Have you finished the movie . John i have not. I have a couple more days. Stephen there. John you know what . We already got it, right . We have i love you, cindy . Thats all i need. Stephen did you have an Imaginary Friend growing up . John this is all imaginary. This is. Youre my Imaginary Friend. Stephen so none of this is real . This isnt even the super bowl night . You are saying we are not actually here on super bowl night . Tell me . Is that what youre trying to tell me . John thats why we dont know whos playing. Stephen oh, i know whos playing. Its kansas city versus the 49ers. How long ago do you think we recorded this . John wait a minute. Wait a minute. Stephen its the new york knickerbockers versus the chicago balloons. It says here bonus question. Should we do the bonus question . John oh. Do we have a wheel we can spin . Stephen sure. There we go, heres your bonus question. Thats what you get action. Action. Ryan gosling is going to be on the show right after you. Hes the next guest after you. Hes promoting a movie with your lovely and talented wife, emily. John oh its gross when you do it. Its grosser. Stephen its more gross when you stick your finger in my mouth its not gross . But if i wipe away just nothing special. Nothing bad. John its getting worse. Stephen okay. Its called the fall guy. How do you feel about your wife in a romcom with ken . Hes got that kenergy. John yeah. I know im kenough. Stephen you got the johnergy . In a fight, who would win . Jack ryan or ken . John is ryan playing a role or is he himself . If hes playing a role, jack ryans gonna roll him. But if he is playing himself, he would hand me my lunch. Stephen ryan gosling would hand you your ass . John yeah, i think he would kick. Stephen youre a big guy, man. John am i . Stephen what . Youre a big guy. John have i ever proven it to you . Stephen what . You tried. Oh, lets do it right now. No, [bleep] you. Right now. Right now, damn it. Right now. Right now. All right, here we go, baby. Here we go. I am going to warn our affiliates we might be going long. Tell gosling john i am warning our affiliates, turn away now. Turn away. Stephen youve gone soft. Look at that, youve gone soft. Come on, lets do it. Ready . John i am, like, twisted. My back. One, two, three. [cheering] stephen if opens in theaters on may 17. John krasinski, everybody. Well be right back with ryan gosling. some people just know that the best rate for you is a rate based on you, with allstate. Not one based on paul. You dont want to ride with paul. Or sarah, not today anyway. And you dont want a rate based on ben, hes got some important business to take care of. Why would you pay a rate based on anyone else . With allstate, youre connected to a rate based on you. On your period, sudden gushes happen. Say goodbye gush fears thanks to always ultra thins. With rapiddry technology. That absorbs two times faster. 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Welcome back to the super bowl show, everybody folks, my next guest tonight is a movie star who just earned an oscar nomination for being way more than kenough. Please welcome back to the late show, ryan gosling [cheering] thank you very much. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being here. Ryan hi, barbies. Hi, kens. Stephen happy super bowl. Ive got to ask you a question. You grew up in canada. Super bowl is not as big a deal there i imagine. You seem sporty, but what was your sport . Obviously not american football. Whatd you do . Ryan i was positive i would be in the nba. Stephen really . Really . What do you top out at . Ryan well, that was the problem. That wasnt the only problem. It was the 90s. There was the bulls, it was dream team. It felt like it was shaqs shoe was doing, like, a mall circuit. It came to my town. Stephen one shoe or two shoes . Ryan one shoe. And you could buy tickets. I waited in line and i saw shaqs shoe, and i saw destiny staring me straight in the face. Stephen you saw the size of shaqs shoe and you went, yes. Thats me. Ryan im going to be that big. Im gonna be in the nba and anyone who thinks otherwise is a damn fool. Stephen you play a stuntman in the new movie the fall guy with the lovely emily blunt. [applause] obviously the sure, why not . Ill join you on that one. I have to ask the obvious question. Ryan gosling, do you do your own stunts . Ryan well, i was prepared to be the first actor to say i have done none of my own stunts. I would be very happy to say that. But the film is honoring stunt performers. It has some of the greatest stunt performers in the business today. Its directed by a former stunt performer so they werent gonna let that happen. I had to do a few things. They dropped me 12 stories off of a building and then they drugged me across the sydney harbor bridge. Stephen is that what this is . cause i was given this photo and im not sure what the context is. Ryan thats it. Thats just me on a shovel getting drug across the sydney harbor bridge. Stephen on the back of a truck as it drives across. And how did that feel . Did it feel like a good idea . Ryan they shot it very early. Because it was the sydney harbor bridge so we didnt want to disrupt traffic. So it was very early. I wasnt fully caffeinated. I just sort of grabbed a shovel and suddenly it happened. We did it a few times. I went back to my trailer and slept and i thought, that was a weird dream. Stephen we have a clip here. Do you need to tell us whats going on . Ryan um. Stephen something big. Ryan yeah. Just i dont really know. Stephen lets discover it together. This will be fun. Jim . Just wondering after this movie if i dont go to prison and youre not busy, maybe we could go to a beach somewhere. Wear a couple of swimming costumes. Just drink a spicy margarita or something . Yeah, make some bad decisions. Okay, sure, yes. Sound like a plan . Its a better plan than this. Please be careful okay, swing him around, go [cheering] stephen i was hoping you would miss. [laughter] that would have been funny. Ive got to talk about the elephant in the room. Congratulations on your oscar nom for barbie. What an extraordinary movie. What a fantastic performance. Soup to nuts, everybody in this movie is amazing. Greta gerwig, when she was here, she said that we were talking about you and your fantastic fur coat right there that you wear as ken. Fantastic fur coat. She said that you pitched the idea of you doing sort of like a dream ballet with all of this fur and youre wrestling with it and it becomes your coat . I would have paid money to see that. What happened to that . Ryan that came to me in a dream. Stephen seriously . Ryan yes. And it became, i think, a nightmare for greta. We were trying to figure it out. It felt like, you know, the mink was his identity, and so he was having this death of the ego and being reborn out of it. And as soon as i was being reborn, i thought, this is a terrible idea. Stephen so you were born ryan i was born out of the mink. I thought, this isnt going to work, but it was a placeholder for what became this ken song. Stephen im just ken. What does that mean to you . It means, seems to mean so many Different Things to different people. What does im just ken mean to you . Ryan i would be more curious what i wouldnt want to kensplain. You know. Yeah. What do you think . Stephen im just ken is accepting yourself for who you are and not needing the approval of others in order to be your best self. Ryan thats better. Stephen great. I understand you had other suggestions that did make it into the movie. For instance, this right here. Can you explain whats going on here . Ryan oh, god. Stephen what part of this is you . Ryan my underpants. Stephen i love this. This is your idea and the fact that your underwear says ken on it, which i did not notice in the movie. Ryan everything was just trying to get barbie to notice me. So i thought if i wrote ken on my underwear, she might say, you know, nice underwear, ken. And then i would say under where . Anything to have a conversation with barbie. Stephen sure. Were going to take a quick break here. Well be right back with more ryan gosling, everybody. Stick around. Two luke so. I hear some of you are concerned about the fact that im taking over the company from my greatuncle. Well, restassured, companys in great hands. Hit the vid, marci. marci now . luke yeah, now. Were bringing together the nations agents in a supercomprehensive agent directory. dave did you know he bought a helicopter . luke gathering upclose, detailed info on neighborhoods. And hiring top experts to get you insider info on local schools. weezy what do yall think. Smash or nah . classroom luke nah. marci you got weezy for this . luke exciting, right . weezy now, who wanna see what one hundred gs looks like . both lukes homesdotcom. Weve done your homework. luke now, that is worth celebrating brad i love it. luke thank you. brad home. Work. Very clever. luke drink up, everybody. vo ding dong homes. Com. [cough] honey. Honey. Nyquil severe honey. Powerful cold and flu relief with a dreamy honey taste nyquil honey, leftover chicken, scallions, cheese. What am i gonna make with this . Mayow mayo . Mayow best foods . . You can talk . A Chicken Salad sandwich. God i love you. Who says you cant go for bold without going broke. Get the brands you want, the prices you want, whenever you want. Tj maxx where you can always afford to be you to the maxx. vo welcome to lobsterfest. Is your party ready . Ready to tango with tails tj maxx on tails on tails . Try lobster lovers dream with two lobster tails and lobster shrimp linguini. Its one of ten nextlevel lobster creations. But lobsterfest wont last, so hurry in. vo imagine your child going to School Without a decent pair of shoes and socks or a warm coat to protect them from the cold. Many families across the country struggle to be able to provide these basic needs for their children. Subaru wants to help by giving these critical items to more than one hundred fifty thousand children in urgent need this year. Subaru. More than a car company. [car tires screeching] whenever heartburn strikes. Get fast relief with tums. Its time to love food back. Also available tums sleep support. Is it menopause or Something Else . The menopause journey has stages. Learn about yours with clearblue menopause stage indicator. That tracks your fsh hormone levels. Combining them with your cycle data. Whats your menopause stage . This ad . Typical. Politicians. Hes bad. Im good. Blah, blah. Lets shake things up. With katie porter. Porter refuses corporate pac money. And leads the fight to ban congressional stock trading. Katie porter. Taking on big banks to make housing more affordable. And drug company ceos to stop their price gouging. Most politicians just fight each other. While katie porter fights for you. For Senate Democrat katie porter. Im katie porter and i approve this message. Stephen hey, everybody. Look at this. Were back with the star of the upcoming fall guy, mr. Ryan gosling. The phrase im kenough is showing up, this is everywhere. You see this right here. Im kenough. What i love about this is that it works for any name that ends with en. It could be im kenough, im benough, im ellenough. We made something for you to wear. Its i am stephenough. You can take. This is for you. Just put that right over there. Put that in your collection. Very nice. I understand. Ryan i have something for you. Stephen what . Ryan can i give you something as well . Stephen of course you may. All right. What is it . Ryan i have a. Where should we put it . Stephen right here. Right here. [applause] [laughter] thank you i love it. I have always wanted, i have always wanted my own mojo dojo casa desk. Youre the person to ask. These days, theres only one measure by which a man can be ruled and its do they have kenergy . Since you are here and you are the ken. Im just curious, do you believe do i deserve this . Do i have the kenergy . Ryan can i just Say Something . The kenergy coming off of you is nuclear, bro. [cheering] right . It is nuclear, bro. Stephen wow. Ryan and i talked to the kens, and we feel it needs to be acknowledged, your kenergy. So we want to knight you into the kendom. Release the mink [cheering] stephen is this is this. Is this the actual coat . Ryan this is the actual mink. Im going to knight you stephen ken colbert. Stephen my liege. Ryan do you solemnly swear to make yourself as smooth and shiny as possible so that you might reflect the awesomeness of barbie . Stephen i will be as smooth and shiny as this man here. Ryan reach into your pocket. [applause] [cheering] stephen the fall guy is in theaters this may. Ryan gosling, everybody well be right back you want to see who we are as americans . Im peter dixon and in kenya. We built a hospital that provides maternal care. As a marine. We fought against the taliban and their crimes against women. And in Hillary Clintons state department. We took on genderbased violence in the congo. Now extremists are banning abortion and contraception right here at home. So, im running for congress to help stop them. For your family. And mine. I approved this message because this is who we are. Democrats agree. Conservative republican steve garvey is the wrong choice for the senate. Our republican opponent here on this stage has voted for donald trump twice. Mr. Garvey, you voted for him twice. As your own man, what is your decision . Garvey is wrong for california. But garveys surging in the polls. Fox news says garvey would be a boost to republican control of the senate. Stop garvey. Adam schiff for senate. Im adam schiff, and i approve this message. Stephen good night taylor welcome to after midnight, the smartest comedy show about the dumbest things on the internet. Every night, three comedians tell jokes and compete for points on a fake game show thats really a comedy show