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Mailbag Time: Ask Illini Questions, Get Illini Answers

In The Middle Of The Roiling Cacophony A Man Stands, Hearing Nothing

11/25/2023 – Michigan 30, Ohio State 24 – 12-0, 9-0 Big Ten, Big Ten East Champs Shrek was nude, erect, and prodigious. This did not phase me. I am a member of the Oregon Trail generation. When the guy who posted this at me was still in the womb I was casually scrolling past goatse and lemonparty. There is only one image on the internet that has ever shook me. I will not say what it is, and I have not seen it in fifteen years. Turgid Shrek is nothing compared to it. It goes without saying that this happened on Twitter, which was already a cesspool before Elon Musk took it over. It was already a cesspool before Ohio State's PI firm spun the Connor Stalions stuff into the Worst Scandal In College Football History™ and Tony Petitti took the bait. Combine these two events and you get the last month of the season, the most hellish one imaginable when your very excellent football team is heading for an undefeated matchup in the greatest rivalry in sports. The context is this: some

Preview: Penn State 2023

Essentials WHAT #2 Michigan (9-0) vs #10 Penn State (8-1)   WHERE Beaver Stadium State College, PA WHEN Noon Eastern THE LINE M –4.5 (Vegas) M –6 (Bill C) TELEVISION FOX PBP: Gus Johnson Color: Joel Klatt TICKETS From $201. WEATHER cloudy minimal wind mid-40s Overview It is November 10th. The season starts tomorrow. Jim Harbaugh is on a plane; the Big Ten hasn't said a dang thing. Welcome to the silliest of all seasons. Michigan takes on a Penn State program that has consistently been the third best in the league post-COVID. For them this has meant a lot of beating up on minnows and failing to take down the Great White Whales of the Big Ten. Massive hype for the PSU-OSU game earlier this year petered out into a grim slog where neither team could move the ball unless Marvin Harrison Jr had it. MHJ does not play for Penn State. As soon as OSU got bailed out by a holding flag on Kalen King on what otherwise would have been a game-changing sack-strip touchdown, it was game over.

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