Carlos Schumer News Today

There you go. All right, theres your sparkler. You ready to do this, buddy. I dont think the beard is a good idea. laughter stephen come on, uncle sam has got to have the beard, all right. Lets do this, flame on. Whooo stephen i am so sorry for your loss. laughter frank was a good man. Everybody said he really lit up a room. laughter you understand he had to wear the beard, right, you know that. laughter i never forget franks last words, he said damn you stephen colbert, goddamn you to hell. lau...

Cheers and applause stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen cheers and applause stephen thank you for joining us. Nation this is my last show before my favorite holiday, the fourth of july. Where thanks to my well stocked cooler, i declare independence from voting safety. Well, folks, i do up the fourth right. I have everybody over. I prepare my famous hot dogs with a secret ingredient. Its heat laughter and speaking...

whooo! the dog is in the house and the dog is loose. seriously, he usually gets drunk on wine coolers and runs off. last year i found him naked behind a true value hardware. as our founders intended. classic lou dog. but sadly, folks, some people out there want to ruin americas sacred birthday. this is fourth of july under attack! (laughter) thank you, jesus, hes a good guy. folks, you know me, i try to like everybody. but theres one person i des piece with a passion, new york mayor mi...

outlets its safe to say that the story got the biggest play on this one. >> nothing much to report today. in fact, hold on captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: welcome to the report, everybody. stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! (cheers and applause) >> stephen: thank you for joining us....

(cheers and applause) >> stephen: thank you for joining us. nation this is my last show before my favorite holiday, the fourth of july. where thanks to my well stocked cooler, i declare independence from voting safety. well, folks, i do up the fourth right. i have everybody over. i prepare my famous hot dogs with a secret ingredient. its heat! (laughter) and speaking of dogs, i never ring in the fourth without my boy lou dog. whooo! the dog is in the house and the dog is loose. serious...

bloomberg pushing to veto a bill allowing the sale of them around the weeks of fourth of july saying they could get not hands of the enemy. >> get into the hands of the enemy? (laughter) oh no, al qaeda might wait until dark and write "death to america" in the air. (laughter) >> stephen: how dare you, sir! how dare you! some of my happiest childhood memories were spent holding a 1500 degree metal rod. (laughter) well folks, i done care what mayor buzzstomp over here says. sparklers des...