Chuckle Bucket News Today

You could have blown up all the stuff so we didnt build them a new army free of cost buried i believe thats on page two on how to win award for dummies. so why is this so easy for a chuckle bucket like me to come up with? a chuckle bucket still drunk on cats hannah ties her -- hand sanitizer. maybe its just harder for joe. joe eft it up just like obama and osama said he would, like hes aft up everything. the likelihood theres going to be the taliban overrunning everything and overrunning the cou...

Martin luther king jr.s. how can that be? >> the president of united states is racist. greg: well, if hes a racist hes really bad at it. trump, the worlds worst racist. thats a great idea for a coffee mug. worlds worst racist. [applause] also missed there was the medal of freedom honors, george herm herman, babe ruth junior. >> george herman babe ruth junior that he was a junior. greg: i just love that. then you have trumps arch hemorrhoid stimulus chasing chuckle bucket -- this is not funny but...

Martin luther king jr.s. how can that be? >> the president of united states is racist. greg: well, if hes a racist hes really bad at it. trump, the worlds worst racist. thats a great idea for a coffee mug. worlds worst racist. [applause] also missed there was the medal of freedom honors, george herm herman, babe ruth junior. >> george herman babe ruth junior that he was a junior. greg: i just love that. then you have trumps arch hemorrhoid stimulus chasing chuckle bucket -- this is not funny but...

Martin luther king jr.s. how can that be? >> the president of united states is racist. greg: well, if hes a racist hes really bad at it. trump, the worlds worst racist. thats a great idea for a coffee mug. worlds worst racist. [applause] also missed there was the medal of freedom honors, george herm herman, babe ruth junior. >> george herman babe ruth junior that he was a junior. greg: i just love that. then you have trumps arch hemorrhoid stimulus chasing chuckle bucket -- this is not funny but...

Martin luther king jr.s. how can that be? >> the president of united states is racist. greg: well, if hes a racist hes really bad at it. trump, the worlds worst racist. thats a great idea for a coffee mug. worlds worst racist. [applause] also missed there was the medal of freedom honors, george herm herman, babe ruth junior. >> george herman babe ruth junior that he was a junior. greg: i just love that. then you have trumps arch hemorrhoid stimulus chasing chuckle bucket -- this is not funny but...

From the" red eye qats debate center. >> welcome to tonights "red eye" debate. im greg gutfeld. host of the debate. short suits are going mainstream. these uh bomb nations are being sold by barneys and j. crew. it has an old school and country club vibe. it is sure to win the battle of the best dressed at the summer occasion. yes, if that is look like a stinky chuckle bucket. >> i dont like. it nobody looks good in cut pants. girls even. >> it is horrible. gavin, have you worn a kilt. is this di...

♪ ♪ time now for one look, i cant leave it alone. >> tell me about it. [ laughter ] >> that is really sweet, greg. >> i want to talk about paul krugman, latest column, outside man, read the first sentence. yes, ive heard about the notion i should be nominated as treasury-secretary. im flattered but it really is a bad idea. so the self-absorbed chuckle bucket goes on without mentioning who actually discussed nominating him. maybe his cats or multiple personalities. i was also nominated for ...

[ laughter ] >> that is really sweet, greg. >> i want to talk about paul krugman, latest column, outside man, read the first sentence. yes, ive heard about the notion i should be nominated as treasury-secretary. im flattered but it really is a bad idea. so the self-absorbed chuckle bucket goes on without mentioning who actually discussed nominating him. maybe his cats or multiple personalities. i was also nominated for secretary of defense and secretary of state but im not a secretary, its demea...

>> greg: all right, this is a great news alert. liberal celebrities are a chuckle bucket. >> mitt romney would raise taxes on middle class families to cut his own and mine. and thats not who we are as a nation. let me tell you why. because eva longoria who worked at wendys flipping burgers, she needed a tax break. but the eva longoria who works on movie sets does not. >> greg: yep, eva longoria wants you the sacrifice because she is doing the same, offering up an entire class of americans who ar...

>> greg: all right, this is a great news alert. liberal celebrities are a chuckle bucket. >> mitt romney would raise taxes on middle class families to cut his own and mine. and thats not who we are as a nation. let me tell you why. because eva longoria who worked at wendys flipping burgers, she needed a tax break. but the eva longoria who works on movie sets does not. >> greg: yep, eva longoria wants you the sacrifice because she is doing the same, offering up an entire class of americans who ar...