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February 16, 2024
"My kid told me the second line of the we love preschool song is everybody’s having a glass, and that does sound more fun than blast"
December 28, 2023
"My daughter said the holes in my jeans make me look scruffy and I’m confused because I don’t remember giving birth to my mother"
September 27, 2023
"I’m not saying parenting is hard. I’m just saying I was a lot better at it before I had kids."
September 5, 2022
"Ill see you later today I whisper, as I pack a sandwich in my kids lunchbox."
September 2, 2022
"Ill see you later today I whisper, as I pack a sandwich in my kids lunchbox."
August 19, 2022
"So excited for my kids to return to school so I can spend my free time reading the 50 emails their school sends each day"
July 2, 2022
"Spend $250 on your kid playing soccer so they can tell you the only thing they enjoyed is the popsicle at the end of the game."
April 5, 2022
"In hell, the lady in front of you in the school pick up lines kid never finishes getting his seat belt on."