Penn State Esque News Today

Luke Combs would make a song about Pickle's.

1/1/2024 – Michigan 27, Alabama 20 (OT) – 14-0, 9-0 Big Ten, Big Ten Champs, Rose Bowl Champs I didn't go to the 1998 Rose Bowl. I was a freshman in college, and thought I'd go to the Rose Bowl when I was a senior. Instead I watched the most important Michigan game since 1948 in my then-girlfriend's house. She chatted in a corner with a friend, not really paying attention. At one point her mom mentioned that if Washington State scored a touchdown she would win a quarter in the...

For the third straight year, we get B1G Championship Game Fee Fi Foe Film! For the second time in three years, that FFFF will be breaking down Iowa. Each year that I've analyzed Iowa tape, it seemed like we said "this is as bad as a P5 offense on a respectable team can get" and each year it's somehow gotten worse, even as the team's record is unchanged. Iowa is 10-2 and B1G West Champions this season, yet possess the 124th-ranked offense in SP+. Every narrative about the...

From a Cafe pitcher to a chicken basket, Penn Staters deserve some Happy Valley-inspired emojis.