Proctologist Appointment News Today

>> i cuss gratuitously. subject matter is another story. >> this is gonna be a good show. >> are there any subjects that are never appropriate for humor? >> people say a good comedian doesnt have to cuss. and i thought, now thats [bleep] rubbish. >> how dirty is too dirty? >> why is all that so funny? >> i dont know. >> what youre about to hear is going to shock and disgust you. >> if you choose to go blue, youve got to do it right. dirty for the sake of dirty, theres nothing worse tha...

>> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> she bounces the little rubber ball up and down, okay? and she stands with her legs like this. and when the little ball bounces up and down, the little ball disappears. >> well, what are you bragging about? >> what? >> my wife does the same thing with a basketball. >> sure. >> yeah, she does it the hard way. shes knock-kneed. >> vaudeville is clean. burlesque is dirty. the thing about burlesque is that audience is all male. youre not going to burlesque to see the comic, ok...

[applause] looked i would like you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. [laughter] and i think i made a mistake. [laughter] looked in the late 60s and 1970s they would televise roast but they were sanitized versions of what you actually see at the friars club. worked as a lot of reasons i wish it on to this man tonight but first while he is a talent i love the italian people. sent to me in brooklyn on a saturday night. [laughter] >> the televise roast of dean tr...

The thing about burlesque is that audience is all male. youre not going to burlesque to see the comic. okay? youre going to see the boobs. >> the dean martin celebrity roast coming from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, id like you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. and i think i made a mistake. >> so in the late 60s and 1970s they would televise friars club roasts, but they were sanitized versions of what you would actually see at the friars club. >> theres a lot...

Not going to burlesque to see the comic but to see the boobs. >> the dean martin celebrity roast coming from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, liked you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. and i think i made a mistake. >> so in the late 60s and 1970s would televise friars club roasts but sanitized versions of what you would actually see the friars club. >> theres a lot of reasons why we should honor this man tonight. first of all italian, i love italian people. nev...

The thing about burlesque audience is all male. not going to burlesque to see the comic but to see the boobs. >> the dean martin celebrity roast coming from the mgm grand hotel. dean, id like you to know that i i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. and i think i made a mistake. >> so in the late 60s and 1970s would televise friars club roasts but sanitized versions of what you would actually see the friars club. >> theres a lot of reasons why we should honor this man tonight....

>> the dean martin celebrity roast coming from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, like you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. and i think i made a mistake. >> so in the late 60s and 1970s would televise friars club roasts but sanitized versions of what you would actually see the friars club. >> theres a lot of reasons why we should honor this man tonight. first of all hes italian, i love italian people. never forget, who said to me in brooklyn on a saturday night. ...

>> vaudeville is clean, burlesque is dirty. burlesque audience is all male. youre not going to burlesque to see the comic. okay, youre going to see the boobs. >> the dean martin celebrity roast coming from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, id like you to know that i consled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. and i think i made a mistake. >> so in the late 60s and 1970s they would tellvise friars club roasts, but they were sanitized versions of what you would actually see at the friars cl...

Burr less can is dirty. the thing fw that is its all male. you are not going there to see the comic. okay. you are going to see the other. >> the dean martin celebrity rose coming to you from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, i would like you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight. [ laughter ] and i think i made a mistake. [ laughter ] >> so in the late 60s and 1970s they would televise roses but they were sanitized versions what you would actually see at the friars c...

And down, the little ball disappears. >> what are you bragging about? my wife does the same thing with a basketball. >> sure? >> she does it the hard way. shes knock-kneed. >> vaudeville is clean, burlesque is dirty. burlesque audience is all male. youre not going to burlesque to see the comic, okay? youre going to see the boobs. >> "the dean martin celebrity roast" coming to you from the mgm grand hotel. >> dean, id like you to know that i canceled a proctologist appointment to be here tonight....