Page 5 - Tiny Apple News Today

Holy crap, marty shes idiots are about to make donald trump president lets go back to 1985 lets do it, america this is the nightly show. Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause cheers and applause larry thank you very much. Welcome to nightly show. I cant do that impression. Marty. Anyway, im not doug brown. Im larry wilmore. Weve got a great show for you tonight. Tony crews will be joining us on the panel. cheers and applause very excited. Cant wait. But we begin with some br...

Scheduled rose garden announcement today to finally answer this question. But like a labradoodle in a tennis ball factory, cnn could not handle the anticipation. Joe biden plans to make an announcement. What the Vice President is going to say today. Presumably is the day. Hes going to announce hes running. No, im not running. Could this be that message . Thats all sheer speculation right now. Hes going to tell us hes not running and it could be he is running. What is going on here . Larry why do...

U. S. Are being shot by toddlers or as the nra calls them overachievers. [laughter] larry a new kind of therapy is helping rich people deal with extreme wealth and therapy for poor people is still the same, whiskey and the new star wars trailer aired during monday night football. How appropriate a bunch of guys in helmets running around while an evil force holds all the power. May the force be with you, america. This is the nightly show captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [cheers and applause...

Youve got that long brown hair thing that i like larry tonightly, Russias Vladimir Putin launches air strikes in syria. Hes really gotten obamas attention. Though if you asked me a giant edible arrangement could also have worked. Just saying. A lawsuit says Donald Trumps College Trump University May have been a total scamment which probably explains why im such a horrible surgeon. laughter i didnt know. I didnt know. And former students are suing trump for failing to provide them a real educatio...

It is already being developed into a movery starring chris pratt. Breep bleep i know, lets, camera, action, america thrk is the nightly show. Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central larry thank you very much. Than. Welcome to the nightly show, please, please. Thank you very much. Larry, larry, larry. Larry we have such a greatshow. I appreciate every time, every time do you that, especially when its jennifers birthday. It means so much. It does. Am i right . You guys, you guys remembered me on je...

[cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central yes, thank you very much. Welcome to the nightly show. Appreciate it. So kind. Was that a rebel yell . What was that back there . Not sure. Suddenly its 1865. Im Larry Wilmore and rapper, writer rory is joining us tonight and hell be performing. Stick around for that. First our top story theres a big fight between top gop candidates. That means lets get the latest on the race to the white house. I love that music. All right. Donald tru...

With bill nye the science guy cheers and applause or as republicans say, im discussing fantasy stuff with bill nye the antireligion guy. cheers and applause and ill ask bill nye. Will Climate Change really cause fishless oceans by 2050 . Because for the record, ive already started hoarding sea bass. laughter its happening, america this is the nightly show cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central oh, wow what a crowd tonight audience chanting larry thank you so much. What a grea...

Interns a living wage. Im feeling the bern. Step inside the nightly show and lets do this captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [cheers and applause] larry welcome to the nightly show. Thank you very much. Thank you so much. Now guys, calm down because i have just a word of caution tonight. If you start to notice a burnino feel the bern, as they say, its because Bernie Sanders is on the show e xxnow, if that burning lasts throughout the week, you should probably see a doctor. So, we are a month...

Larry tonightly, donald trump says Hillary Clinton using the bathroom is disgusting. If sitting down to pee is disgusting, what do you call someone who spews crap out of his mouth . Mexican authorities arrest the notorious affluenza teen who killed four people while driving drunk. Once again, mexicans doing an important job americans wont do. And Bernie Sanders is with us again tonight. Hes already slashed my salary to give the money to teenagers interns a living wage. Im feeling the bern. Step ...

In oregon. Hey, armed militia as long as youre in oregon, why dont you go ahead and die of dysentery . Happy new year, america this is the nightly show cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central larry yes welcome to the nightly show audience chanting larry thank you so much yeah we are back, man im your host, larry wilmore. Weve got a great show tonight. I just wanted to let everyone know that, at the end of tonights show, im going to answer one of your questions from twitter, an...