Tiny Greg News Today

>> hes a throw-back. >> hes a throw-back. hes old-school stuff. >> yes. >> he stole the kids marbles, see. [chuckles] >> ah, gee. thats it? >> im told i have to go. >> greg: all right. go away. so last week, i told you how much i enjoyed caressing the elbows of rotund carpenters and i do. but i also love cherries, so i am excited about my final bid for artwork, which is called david gregorys hair. john from valencia offered $2,000. i will be adding an additional unicorn with our autographs. sinc...

Their enemies, which is fine, if the protesters agree to post their addresses on the web. then we drop by their place while theyor the pot. but we wont. we are too damn polite and we have jobs. if you disagree with me, then you are worse than nir rosen. greg-alogue. >> bill, people often protest in your home, but thats because your home is a park. >> yeah, technically, i squat there and i squat a lot after burritos. >> greg: dont you think if you go to far when you show up at somebodys place or ...

Them, i can understand why they are upset and i have forgotten about the other protempt but its weight e. these people have done nothing wrong. even our own -- what it was? the f-box business guy -- he said apart from that one annoying guy on the tape, the rest of it was peaceful. >> greg: but i think matt wells summed it up perfectly. he said our tax dollars exist to make public sector unions happy. isnt that what we are seeing? people throwing a tantrum and going to other peoples homes? >> abs...

>> you are worse than hitler. >> thats just ignorant. >> come on! >> greg: i have been saying it for three years, saying you are worse than hitler, thats kinda my thing. >> at the risk of being didaktic, we dont have a constitutional right to kill others. >> you are not using words like didaktic on this show. talk in one or two syllable words so the whole show can understand. >> greg: thank you for standing up. i cant believe she did that. >> no, thats it. >> greg: should campbell county win the...

Writes... >> greg: jack, thats not an ear piece, but my good friend, who i if you understand living near the train tracks one summer. there he is. all right. now he comes with me wherever i g. i love him. and hes as snug as a bug, chewing away part of my brain stem. its why i smell colors and i taste noise. and now, another email... >> greg: all right. if you are going to write in and disguise yourself, use an email address another gpaltrop@gmail.com. and spell your name correctly. we will have ...

Entering often womens bathrooms. >> well, heres the thing, greg, i ghot a bladder the size of a dime. and the mens room was always occupied by andy and another dude. so i had to go in the womens room to do what nature asked me to do. >> i wasnt even there, so, you know -- >> yeah. you were in the bathroom. >> greg: we gotta take a break. when we return -- [chuckles] -- >> careful. witthe venture card from capital one, we get double miles on every purchase. so we earned a trip to vegas twice as f...

>> thank you. i have no idea what that means. >> greg: i have no idea what you just said. >> ill just move on. dude, well act like it never happened. >> greg: okay. andy has a habit of saying that a lot. saturday morning. >> usually it involves an exchange of money, though. brooke, you were unclear why the said it went against his religion. his dad is a minister in the believers in fellowship that believes young men and women shouldnt touch in an unfamiliar manner. >> now i know. >> i usually to...

Question for s.c., you were there? >> i was, didnt have you a panel on saturday? what happened? >> i went out with and you i literally could not talk. >> i was the first to leave you -- of all of you. i was the first to leave to go home to my room, knowing i had a panel the next morning, but i couldnt talk. >> knowing that you are a rip-roaring drunk. you were starting to drink at noon that day. i had a show that day. >> didnt you steal a bottle of champagne? >> yes! >> you gave me a bottle of c...

The problem was on the back. kids, how many times have i told you -- on the buttocks, on the back? >> greg: by the way, thats your logic for everybody everything. how old school is the -- is the kick-me sign? they were doing that in little rascals. how does this still exist? i thought people stopped doing this back in the 70s. >> yeah. >> greg: you have a comment? email us. or leave a voicemail. still to encourage the half-time report.

>> i can! >> as the offspring said, we have to keep them separated. >> gregg, you played girls field hoc nehigh school and lettered in it in college, so you can empathize with this young woman. >> i quit sophomore year because of the draft, due to the skirts. >> and you also got pregnant. >> well, they let you play with that. i went to a very skanky college. there is a third factor to consider here besides -- well, no, no. >> back to the story. >> sorry. there is a third factor to consider here....