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December 23, 2013
Beyonce. >> she plays secret santa for last-minute shoppers. >> sometimes waiting until the last day does pay off. >> i wanted to give everyone a gift. for everyone in the store right now, the first $50 of your holiday gifts are on me. merry merry christmas from beyonce. >> and todays top trender, lou christmas. >> republicans have thrown unemployed americans under the bus. >> because congress didnt act, more than 1 million of their constituents will lose a vital economic lifeline at christmasti...
December 20, 2013
Have ever met. >> dont make me laugh. ha-ha-ha. >> that guy is -- he might be ronald reagan. >> and todays top trender. cheap talk. >> when you raise the price of employment, you get less of it. >> unemployment among young people will go up if the minimum wage goes up. >> if you raise the minimum wage too high, youre ghot going to have more jobs but fewerser jobs. >> a new study destroys the gops minimum wage talking point. >> every time we have tried to raise the standard of living, they say yo...
December 18, 2013
Parody. >> news team assemble! >> she-las do not believe in the newsroom. >> i dont know what were yelling about! >> boy, that escalated quickly. >> im in a glass crate of emotion. >> good night. and go bark yourself, san diego. >> and todays top trender. jobber. >> the american economy, greatest in the world, is stuck in a new normal. high unemployment. >> 7%. that is a five-year low. >> slow growth. >> 47 straight months of private sector job growth. >> john boehner says the president is stall...
December 17, 2013
Pope. >> the pope responds. he says the marxist ideology is wrong. >> right wingers continue their attack on pope francis. >> he literally went after, quote, trickle-down. >> the pope is ripping america. the pope ripping capitalism. they are recognizing this guy as man of the year for one reason. he did a big hit on capitalism. >> i as a catholic agree with rush that the pope sounds like he is against capitalism. >> they name him man of the year because he attacks capitalism and ticks me off. >>...
December 16, 2013
Ive seen all day. >> the number two trender, saddle sore. >> end up losing to the packers. >> we blew it. >> seriously, you cant make this stuff up with romo. >> peanut butter and jelly sandwich, youll never get anywhere. >> tony romos meltdown cost the cowboys. >> blowing a 23-point lead at home. >> snap out of it! >> we have seen this movie way too many times. >> and todays top trender. tpp trauma. it will be nafta on steroids. >> members of congress arent supposed to tell you what they have r...
December 12, 2013
Writers block. ♪ hey, do you know about the usa ♪ ♪ can you tell me about the constitution ♪ >> right winger redefines the constitution. >> if by religion, if we dont understand the word religion to mean christianity as the founders intended it, we have no way to stop islam. we have no way to stop satanism. >> and todays top trender, ill-advised. >> you said you were not opposed to state based exchanges. >> now hes saying state exchanges are not all that bad. >> what do you mean? >> ron ...
December 11, 2013
With the commies. >> whats the point? neville chamberlain shook hands with hitler. >> honestly, i was surprised that obama and raul castro didnt exchange spit. really. >> what else are you going to do at a funeral. give the guy one of these? oh, yeah, how are you doing? boop. and todays top trender. make a deal. >> these people, dressed as they are, come from all over the united states to make deals. >> we have broken through the partisanship and gridlock and reached a bipartisan budget compromi...
December 10, 2013
First president to of publicly mention area 51. >> in todays top trender, heated rhetoric. >> obama care extinguishing our nations volunteer fire departments? >> the irs considers volunteer firefighters that spend more than 30 hours on the job as employees towns they volunteer for could be forced to provide health insurance for them. >> conservative media continues to fan the anti obama care flames. >> the latest concern is that your prescription drugs could be taken away too. >> for those gover...
December 9, 2013
>> i am. >> boy. that escalated quickly of the. >> the boy band, and the anchor man, form a super group on snl. >> let our poe we ares combine. >> now we are nine direction. ♪ skyrockets in flight ♪ afternoon delight >> thats right. ♪ afternoon dilute . >> and todays top trender, sick em. >> familys plan cancelled because it didnt comply with the affordable care acts high standards. >> youre getting used to whats going on, and then all of a sudden having something like this thrown in is de...
December 4, 2013
>> anti grinch viral is up and will continue to monitor for threats. >> no word if santa is going to use drones this year. wolf? >> the number-two trender. space cases. >> pigs in space! >> while the budget deadline looms -- >> there are only seven work days left until the end of the first session of congress. but there doesnt seem to be a sense of urgency to get a deal or to meet any dead lien when it comes to a budget. the house science committee is out of this world. >> a full house committee...