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Our very sweet and sensitive daughter is in second grade at our local public elementary school. My husband and I place a high value on academics, but I’ve been dismayed about the amount of homework she gets, all of which consists of repetitive worksheets and rote memorization tasks that evidence shows are not effective. Since January, her homework has been to memorize 20 spelling words each week. Every day we try to practice, but sometimes it’s like pulling teeth. I hate feeling like I’m forcing her to do this extra work when I don’t believe there’s a real benefit to most of it, but I’m a rule follower and so, if the teacher assigns it, we make sure she does it. We’ve tried to build some intrinsic motivation in the form of being proud at being able to do hard things and persevering even when some tasks aren’t fun, etc., but I’m honestly not sure how much that’s helping.
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Dear Care and Feeding,
How much input should my mother-in-law have about what happens at her house in relation to my child? I have an 18-month-old, and my mother-in-law is a doting grandmother. However, she seems to have no respect for our parenting decisions, and flagrantly disregards them. Recently, we went as a family over to grandma’s house. Right after we got there, it came up in conversation that we still aren’t letting her watch TV. We are holding off as long as we can, partly because we don’t trust ourselves to be able to regulate it once it starts. Immediately my MIL began saying that things like
Dear Care and Feeding,
In our family, we are very open about sex, gender, and bodies. For example, our 7-year-old has known since toddlerhood where babies come from. I think we missed the boat on one topic, though, and we don’t know how to reverse course. Starting around 2 up until the last year, our daughter was phobic about blood, so much so that the very idea of it would make her freak-the-f out. So, to avoid terrorizing her, I hid my period from her. I had hoped to introduce this aspect about our bodies when it came up, but by the time her phobia was resolved at 6, she was no longer walking in on me in the bathroom. I am grateful to have this measure of privacy back in my life, but now I don’t know how it will come up naturally. I don’t want to do the weird awkward “talks” like my mom, but I also don’t want my kid finding out from her peers on the playground or during some poorly executed health class at school about menstruation. How do I broach the topic natural