It is not lost on me that at this moment, there are some little girls watching as i become the first black woman to be given this same award. [cheers and applause] for too long, women have not be heard or believed if they dared to speak their truth to the power of those men, but their time is up. A new day is on the horizon. When nobody ever has to say, me too. Again. Thank you. Yes, we can [laughter] am i the only one who had that feeling . No . Yeah, it feels like this is oprah 2020, come on. I will say i can see how oprah seems like the perfect opponent for donald trump. I mean, shes everything that hes not. Shes black, shes a woman, she likes to read. Theyre the complete opposite. Like, i bet if we looked into it, wed find out that donald trump once repossessed 100 peoples cars. I get a car, i get a car, i get a car. Ladies, look under your skirts, its me this weekend, while the senate was shutting down the government, the people were shutting down the streets, with the second year of the womens march taking place in cities around the world. [cheers and applause] for more on this, we turn to desi lydic and dulce sloan. [funky music] it was the one Year Anniversary of the womens march, and you know donald trump was pissed off because its the two things he hates most feminism and exercise. Mm. Women across the country took to the streets today, as they did a year ago to demand equality, justice and social and political change. The marches took place from coast to coast. Theyre over 250 marches planned around the world this weekend. Seattle, San Francisco, miami, phoenix, washington, new york, philadelphia, cincinnati, chicago, denver, los angeles, San Francisco it goes on, and on and on. It is through human dedication and effort that we move forward. [cheers and applause] thats right. Women. Be. Marchin. Women be marching sorry, i was on the one and the three. Ii know, i know. You always are. But what do you say . Best and worst things about the march. Mm. For me, i feel like the best thing was just seeing hundreds of thousands of women marching all over the world. But the worst thing did you see the line for for the bathroom . Mm. It looked like they were selling iphone 11s in there. I couldnt find my pussy hat from last year, so i just put on a pair of pink underwear upside down, which is actually more accurate. Mm. You know what really made me proud . Oh, you remember last year, some people were talking about, but what exactly are you marching for . What are you trying to accomplish . Well, this year, women said, heres what were doing. Were grabbing men by the ballots. Mm. Organizers have dubbed it power to the polls. Its a push to get women to register to vote and to run for office in novembers midterm elections. Were really encouraging people to go vote in november of 2018. Kelly fowler marched in last years rally, and was so inspired, she decided to run for state office in virginia and won. Last year, i marched. Then i ran. [cheers and applause] then i won. [cheers and applause] [both cheering] thats right. Women are running for office and now we can sexually harass our interns and cover it up for decades. Whoo equality. Equality [cheers and applause] my guest tonight is an actor who plays zoey on grownish. Please welcome yara shahidi. You areyoure also engaged in politics in a way that most young people arent. As you said, you are turning 18 and because of that, you are really excited to become a part of the voting process. Which is not normal for most young people. Do you think thats a sign of the times were living in . Yes. I mean, its always been who i am. Ive always been excited to vote. And, like, when i was four, i had asked my grandfather if hed be my roommate in college because i was already looking forward to being in college. When you were four . Yes, um ive always been one to plan ahead. Yeah, thats way ahead. And soi mean, i think being 18, its like, okay, cool. Im an adult and everything. But i can finally vote and i think whats really exciting is that i will be able to vote during midterms and midterms determines how we redistrict. And being able to vote while we figure out how we are redistricting means that in 2020, were gonna have a few things figured out, hopefully. Do youdo you think enough young people will come out and vote . I know you have an initiative that youre trying to inspire young people to come out. Right, yeah, so it is called 18 by 18, for obvious reasons, but i think a really big part of what this election proved is just how young people vote and also, with everything happening in virginia and alabama, we see that people are not only willing to vote for firsttime candidates, but there are firsttime voters finally coming out. Right. And a lot of the issue that i personally see with how we educate this generation is as though we dont have to have a political opinion until its time to vote. Uhhuh. And so we inherit this system that we have no idea about and we have no clue how it properly functions. And so we theoretically vote based on ideology, with no backup for why we support certain ideologies and really, no correlation between how our passions translate into policy change. Right. And so to be able to create a platform in which it can easily spell that out, and for us to be able to truly take control of this political system, i feel like is really important. 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More revolutions in the making thing. That play like a girl thing. That fourlegged friends thing. At t gives you more for your thing. More entertainment, internet, and unlimited plans. More for your thing. Yeah, thats our thing. Do nthanks grandma. Why dont you fetch me some doritos. whoosh dog barks fetch me a bare na. whoosh and dog bark bear growl scream crunch [hiphop music] [cheers and applause] this past weekend was the miss America Pageant and here to give us her thoughts is michelle wolf, everybody. [cheers and applause] thank you, trevor. You know, i dont know if you know this about me, but i love pageants. You know, i actually wanted to get into pageants but then i realized getting into miss america is super hard. Theres, like, tons of qualifications. Look at all those rules i would never qualify. I broke, like, three of those rules today. Besides, i dont really have tiara hair. It would get lost. You know, i realized its actually easier to become president than it is to become miss america. cause, you know [cheers and applause] cause you know what the qualifications are for president . 35 and born here. Thats not qualifications. Thats the search terms of a sad lady on a match. Com profile. My type . Well, at this point, ill settle for 35 and born here. Or i dont know, not dead. Im flexible. Wow, ii honestly had no idea there were so many qualifications to be miss america. Oh, no, no. Not to be miss america, thats just how you get into the competition. Once youre in the door, you still have to do all this crap. Miss new jersey, kaitlyn schoeffel. [upbeat music] [traditional music] [playing saxophone] [yodeling] all right. [laughter] couple things yodeling ventriloquism . Wow, us women keep finding more creative ways to die alone. Also, what did you do to my brother . Turn him back into a real boy [laughter] you know, i know people think pageants are sexist and they are. But they also take time at the end of the competition to ask the contestants really hard questions. Last month, a demonstration of neo nazis, White Supremacists and the kkk in charlottesville, virginia turned violent and a counter protester was killed. The president said there was shared blame with very fine people on both sides. Were there . Tell me yes or no and explain. I think that the white supremacist issue it was very obvious that it was a terrorist attack and i think that President Donald Trump shouldve made a statement earlier addressing the fact and making sure all americans feel safe in this country. That is the number one issue right now. How crazy is that . It took the president four days and three tries to give a [bleep] answer to that question. And miss texas nailed it in 20 seconds. [laughter] [cheers and applause] this is how little faith america has in its women. They have to be prettier, more talented and smarter than the president , just to get the job of waiving for a year. Shes gonna be stuck in a parade like, glad i solved that nazi problem. They wont even let me drive. Heres my suggestion lets switch the president with anyone from miss america. Id even take that weird ventriloquist lady as president , cause right now, all we have is the dummy. Michelle wolf, everybody. Youve been on a journey that has been one that i think youve shared with many people in america. And that has been the journey of a curvy woman trying to find her place in not just in modeling and in fashionbut in society. In the world. Yeah, i have been told im not good enough because of my thunder thighs. Ive been told i wasnt going to get covers of magazines because i was too curvy, too loud, too tall, too outspokenso many Different Things about me that werent good enough. And the more i persevered and the more that i said, oh really . Well, im gonna keep working hard because thats the kind of family that i come from. I dont take no for an answer. And i finish what i started. Then you can have whatever you want, as long as you know that your dreams are attainable. You had to work hard against an industry that in many ways told you you didnt belong. Yes. How did, like how does modeling deal with that paradox . Because it feels like one. Its like, modeling goes, like, this is what modeling is. Right. And now there are new voices coming forward saying, no, this is not what modeling should be about. I hit really low times in my life where i thought i wasnt good enough. I was in a terrible relationship where my boyfriend chased me around the kitchen with a butcher knife, and i still stayed with him because my confidence was so low. And its in those moments that i share with the reader and i let them know, i was just like you. I hated who i was, but you can have whatever you want. 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And if we can fix damaged heart valves without open heart surgery, imagine what we can do for an irregular heartbeat, even high blood pressure. If we can use analyze each patients Breast Cancer to personalize their treatment, imagine what we can do for the conditions that affect us all. Imagine what we can do for you. [hiphop music] when i heard that we were gonna do a yearend special, i was like, we have to do a song. Oh, like when i said hey, desi, we should do a yearend song. And you were like, good idea, dulce. Yeah, exactly. And i knew that it had to be about women. Because this has been such an incredible year for women. It was terrible. This year has been terrible for women. It was a nobrainer to get on board with this project. I wanted to be a part of the solution, not the problem. Men been creepy a long ass time. And i wanna be here to support women like the underwire of a bra, and just lift oh, my god, im doing it, too. Hey, you gonna cut that, right . Please, just cut that, please. Yall got me a hit, right . Yeah yes you ready . Oh, its so good. Is it good . Its so good. Oh, its great. Youre so amazing, youre so good. Ive been writing some lyrics here what youve been doing what youve been doing has been great. Thank you, thank you. Once you see what i got, though just you. Thank you. No, but the two weve been working together. Just her, just her. Wait till you see my lyrics, roy. Oh, my god, dulce incredible voice, just a talent. I havent heard anybody this natural since back when i discovered luther vandross. You see on that piano . [playing piano] [laughter] she learned that today. [playing piano] self taught thats princelevel [bleep]. We should be honored to be in the presence of a musical genius like this. In our lifetime of vocalists like this, well never this guy, braggin about me again. [laughs] you know, i think the key is treating your voice like its an instrument. Like any other instrument. A guitar, um, an electric guitar. A piccolo. Ill let him ive been singing my whole life, from the time i was a little kid. And dulce has been singing for i just started today. Well, lucky for you, i am a professional. So i will get you up to speed. [rolling lips] [rolls lips] but bigger. [rolling lips in scale] and thenha ha this is gonna be a powerful song for women. And black women. [laughter] [vocalizing] yeah, yeah. Yeah, thats good. No, thats good, thats good. You justbut a little more like [vocalizing out of key] oh, yeah ah you always end with, ah is that good . Yeah, thatthat was great. All right, you ladies ready to lay it down . You ready . And here it is. The World Premiere of song for women 2017. This is for you, ladies. [light piano music] 2017 mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm [whispers] women. [upbeat music] started this year marching handinhand to show that pussy grabber with the terrible tan [squealing] but everywhere i look [autotuned] a lady resisted tried to stop lizzy yet she persisted all around the world, weve come so far saudi women sitting at the wheel of a vehicle pm, chancellor, all weve reached south korean women even getting impeached both what a year for women its why were singin finally see us winning what a year for women wonder woman set records at the movies who knew you could direct when you have boobies . On the charts, cardi b, spittin the fire beyonce had twins thats double messiah megyn kelly went to nbc from fox 17 million for a show that sucks women all over taking care of each other showing some love to our sisters of color i can say that, right . [music stops] nope. Both what a year for women its why were singin finally see us winning in this year of women the old Harvey Weinstein cant come to the phone right now. Why . Because this is the year we all stood strong no one wants to see your nasty ass dong back off, all you producers and actors end up in the trash like the Oreilly Factor cause when you look at the patriarchy hold up, hold up. Dj mansplain is here. Ima tell yall what really happened this year. Men are from mars women, theyre from venus nobody likes a surprise penis but maybe you ask for it its kind of on you we men are dumb we cant control what we do uh, too many men this year acting like stalkers it makes me so sad i got a daughter and thats all the time i got to mansplain time for the hook yo, ladies, hit that refrain uh no. Were not doing that. Mmmm. Get the [bleep] out of here. Out. Damn, man. Im trying to help, you know . Yo, hillary clinton, take us home. Ohh both what a year for women its why were singin keepin it feminine ohh both with this mess weve been in our lady dicks are swingin sick of all this winnin its the sound [sparks zapping] [out of key] were bringing what a year for women [holding note] yeah [cheers and applause] today, right now, you have more power at your fingertips than entire generations that came before you. But its not really about what technology can do, its about what you can do with it. We are living in the future we always dreamed of. We have mixed reality that changes how we see the world, and ai empowering us to change the world we see. So what will you do with it . Go. Yes go. Yes nice play. Still buffering. Mine too. What happened . Hey, joy, you should let your new pals know that according to a leading independent study, the most awarded network is now best in streaming. I think you just did. You both can get a much better view of the game on the iphone on verizon unlimited. Thanks. Thanks. Hey, thomas, whens your flight . gasps someone stole my watch. Hey vo unlimited is only as good as the network its on. So get the best unlimited on the most awarded network. And right now, when you buy iphone 8, youll get one on us. I like beer beer come on my jolly good fellows i like beer beer it tastes mighty fine specially on nights that are mellow. Yes, we like beeeeeeer wow. Good job everyone. [hiphop music] last night, the state of alabama elected a democratic senator for the First Time Since 1992. And this happened for a few reasons. Ideological divisions within the republican party, suburban moderates turned off by president trump. Oh, and apparently, some people dont like accused kiddie touchers, also. But there was one really huge factor that you cant ignore. Doug jones was able to pull of this stunning upset with the help of a special co