Somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with Trevor Noah Trevor lets kick things off in california. The only state where botox is considered an essential service. This years wildfire season has been one of the worst in history with dozens of fires burning a record 2 million acres. And now were finding out that one of this weekends biggest blazes started in one of the dumbest ways possible. Crews continue battling dozens of raging wildfires in california. Officials say one of the fires, the el dorado in San Bernardino county started after pyrotechnics were used in a gender reveal party. Scorched thousands of acres. Only 7 contained as of late last night. No word of any charges related to the fire. Trevor ive said it before and ill say it again, these gender reveals have gone too far 10,000 acres have burned and its not even the first time this kind of thing has happened. Ty at this point a gender reveal party is one of the most dangerous terrorist organizations. But, guys, this has to stop. Right . Or at least if you insist on a gender reveal, you should do something that helps the situation. The water is pink its a girl and aside from all the damage it can cause, celebrating a babys genitalia is starting to feel very outdated. Like given everything were learning about gender, gender reveal parties should only happen when the child is old enough to know their actual gender and to pitch in some cash for the fire damage. Honestly, i dont even know why we need gender reveal parties. You know what we do need, though, race reveal parties. A bombshell confession from an africanamerican history professor at George Washington university who claims ties to the bronx. Jessica krug reveals in a blog post that she is a white jewish woman who has been pretending to be black for years. She feigned being black and latina, now a white woman says she is canceling herself revealing decades of deception. Krug has been teaching since 2012 often posing as puerto rican. Shes seen here addressing the new york city in june. Thank you so much power to my black and brown siblings. She is apologizing saying her life is based on a lie. Trevor you cant say that when you told the lie. Only when someone else told you the lie. Luke, i am your father no my life was based on a lie unlike raich raich who failed to hold on to her black identity, jessica krug came out and said cancel that. In a way shes making history which i cant wait to celebrate not actually black history month. I find feel sorry for this woman. She spent most of her life being black. Now she has to adapt to being white. Thats not easy. All of a sudden she has to learn the lyrics to sweet caroline. Shes going to have to pretend to enjoy farmers markets. She has to drive an old car even though she can afford a brandnew one. Its fiscally responsible. Black people have bigger concerns than white ladies selfcarrotting themselves. Another video of Shocking Police brutality came out this time in upstate new york. Protests in rochester peaceful last night, marched to the steps of city hall where they announced demands including firing and prosecution of the officers involved in the death of daniel prude plus resignation of the mayor and belief. The peaceful demonstration followed days of highly charged clashes between protestors which began with the release wednesday of body cam footage of prudes arrest. The footage from the march 23 encounter showed him placed in a spit hoot on the ground because officers believe he had covid. He went into cardiac arrest and died a week later. Damage from protesters in this market but owners say theyre standing with those who are standing against injustice. shouting up. Trevor okay, guys, no. No, no, no. Im sorry, but no. Im all for the black lives Matter Movement and fighting against systemic racism and Police Brutality but its not acceptable to storm a restaurant and flip over tables. First, you introduce yourself. Hi, my name is sean, and i will be your protester this evening. Then you flip over the tables manners, people. Now, look, jokes aside, we are living through one of the most stressful times in modern history, right . And in order to have any honest conversation, we have to acknowledge everything thats happening. You have a pandemic with people losing their jobs and lives. On top of all that, you have a nation that has been inundated with images of Police Brutality day in and day out. People are experiencing it all the time. Heres what i think. I think sometimes in Society People get more focused on the symptoms than the cause because right now everyone is talking about whats the right way to protest. I think the real question people should be asking is why does there need to be a protest in the first place . Because if i had a magic wand, i wouldnt be trying to fix protest. I would use it to get the police to stop brutalizing black people. Thats why the protests are happening. How theyre happening is another conversation. Thats what i would do if i had the magic. Then first i would make yarple stick with one size plug, then stop brutalizing black people. Finally, lets have a little bit of light news with jelly bellies. A perfect gift when you forgot to get a gift until you landed at the airport because now they could with your ticket to a world of pure imagination. The founder of jelly belly is taking a page out of charlie and the Chocolate Factory with his own willy wonka golden s ticket hunt. He is hided necklaces with coded golden tags across the opportunity. Most winners will get 5,000 each, but the big winner gets the key to their very own candy factory. Trevor i dont know about this story. This dude is just giving away a candy factory . Something seems fishy to me. Hes probably going to hand over the keys and be the factory is all yours, kid by the way, jelly bellies are made out of asbestos. Bye why do we act like willi willy a was a fun dude. How many kids died in his factory . If you think about it, willy wonka was jigsaw in a top hat. He killed people in increasingly elaborate ways, but bays he did it while singing show tunes, people were, like, this guy is whimsical. Wheres the kid from germany . I dont know, the song is so catchy when we come back, why trump and russia are both pushing Coronavirus Vaccines a little too hard. Dont g its time to step up. Prep up. Step up. Prep up. To help keep you free from the risk of hiv. From the makers of truvada, theres another prep option descovy for prep. A oncedaily prescription medicine that helps lower the chances of getting hiv through sex. Its not for everyone. Descovy for prep has not been studied in people assigned female at birth. Talk to your doctor to find out if its right for you. Step up. For health and body. Prep up for your one and only love or many loves. For kings, this queen, and you royals in between. For my now. Our now. And my future. Our future. Step up. Prep up. Descovy is another way to prep. Descovy does not prevent other sexually transmitted infections, so its important to use safer sex practices and get tested regularly. You must be hivnegative to take descovy for prep. So you need to get tested for hiv immediately before and at least every 3 months while taking it. If you think you were exposed to hiv or have flulike symptoms, tell your doctor right away. They may check to confirm you are still hivnegative. Serious side effects can occur, including kidney problems and kidney failure. Rare, lifethreatening side effects include a buildup of lactic acid and liver problems. The most common side effect was diarrhea. 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Go where love takes you. avo female get 0 apr financing for 63 months on the 2020 Subaru Outback and other select models. Is the people you share it with. Tmobiles new offer on iphone better so right now switch and get two new lines of unlimited for only 90 and get 2 iphone 11s or 2 iphone 11 pros on us. All on tmobiles most powerful signal that goes farther than ever before. Hurry into tmobile now and get two iphone 11 s or two iphone 11 pros on us. Only at tmobile. We adapt and we change were here to keep you safe. The daily social distancing show. Believe it or not, it has now been nine months since the coronavirus was first unleashed into the world by george soros from a reversed engineered dinosaur dna. Its not that . Thats what i read on facebook. Anyway, lets catch up on where the pandemic stands now in our ongoing segment the pandumbic. Are you sure it wasnt dna . As of today, the United States has had more than 6. 3 million confirmed cases of covid 19, and while transmission rates have declined from their peak in july, there are still new hot spots popping up all over the country. Most recently on newly reopened college campuses. Across the country more universities temporarily switching to Virtual Learning with only some students staying on campus, as College Towns around the country are quickly becoming epicenters for the virus. In georgia, mississippi and utah, thousands of students and hundreds of teachers have recently been asked to quarantine. Many universities are take drastic action to ensure students, teachers and staff are safe all along the way, and one of the harsh estpunishments imposed, 11 first year students at Bostons Northeastern University were dismissed and declined a refund for their 36,000plusdollar tuition after crowding together in a hotel room. Trevor thats right. Some schools are kicking out students for partying but keeping their tuition. Which is insane. I mean, if you waste 36grand on college, you should at least leave with a communications degree. I do hope colleges get all these outbreaks under control soon because going to college remotely is just not the same. There are so many things about the College Experience that only work if youre there in person. I mean, imagine turning to a frat hazing on zoom. Grab your bottle of hot sauce from your fridge and chug it i have apricot lacroix. I can chug it. Yeah, chug it if youre a high school senior, only one thingto youre looking at when applying to colleges. Find out which schools avoid coronavirus outbreaks and do not apply there. Those people do not know how to party. This is one more reason we really cant have a season soon enough. Another problem is we also cant get one too soon. Latest cbs news poll finds the majority of americans are skeptical about a vaccine. 65 say if one became available this year, theyd consider it rushed, and 58 say they would consider getting one but wait to see what happens. Kamala harris was asked if she would trust a Trump Administration vaccine. It would have to be a credible source of information that talks about the efficacy and the reliability of whatever hes talking about. I will not take his word for it. He wants us to inject bleach. No, i will not take his word. Trevor look, i get why white people are skeptical. There are a lot of things where ill take trumps recommendation. How to write an n. D. A. , how to do the smooth criminal leave where the set of stairs are too slippery, but vaccines is not an area of his expertise. You dont want trump involved in this deal. Its like going on shark tank and getting advice from robert. Any offers . Mark, lori . Im good, ill just go bankrupt. Thanks, though, robert. Thanks for that. Eat whic way, its cute how peoe think it will be up to them whether they get trumps vaccine. It will be up to trump and knowing him hell turn it into quid pro quo. Ill give you one shot for a piece of dirt on joe biden. What do you say . Lest be honest, this skepticism hasnt come out of nowhere. President trump has given people pretty good reasons his timeline might not be based on science. In a new year conference, President Trump with us all but giving away his own october surprise suggesting there will be a Coronavirus Vaccine ready by election day. You could have a very big surprise coming up. Were going to have a vaccine very soon, maybe etch before a special date. Do you knowt what date im talking about. Trevor why is he talking about election day like a weird sex innuendo. You know what date im talking about. Gonna stick your big hard vote in that ballot box. Just put it right in. I mean, obviously, we know what date hes talking about. What other date would trump possibly remember besides election day . His kids birthdays, . His anniversary . A date from a history book . He doesnt know any of those things. This is why people are skeptical. Trump keeps talking about this vaccine as if the goal is to get it out before election day. And any normal president would at least pretend that the vaccine will be released based on science, but trump doesnt even pretend. Guys got the worst poker face in the world which is why he would be the best and worst person to play poker with. You would know when he was bluffing, but would be no point because he would never pay up. With trump making everybody nervous, the Companies Competing to make the vaccine are actually getting together to try to calm all this shit down. A Major Development in the race to produce a Coronavirus Vaccine in something very unprecedented. Some of the countrys most wellknown drugmakers present ago united front saying they will not rush a vaccine without proper testing and approval. These are some of the Biggest Pharmaceutical Companies in the world, typically fierce competitors, but are coming together with what they called an historic pledge to shore up confidence in a possible covid 19 vaccine. The c. E. O. S of nine pharmaceutical Companies Including astrazeneca, johnson johnson, and pfizer say they will commit to high ethical standards and sound scientific principles as they work toward developing a vaccine. The statement includes a pledge to always make the safety and well being of vacs made individuals our top priority. Trevor yes, people are so skeptical about this vaccine that the Drug Companies had to come out and pledge that theyre not going to rush things. Thats how bad trump is. Hes managed to make big pharma turn into the good guys. Thats saying something. Janlsenen janzen sold powder that gave them cancer. Glaxosmithkline hit safety data from the f. D. A. Pfizer has the unnecessary p in it. If i see a p followed by an f that better be followed by changs, otherwise im out. The important thing, its so hard for people to trust that any vaccine that comes out as safe and effective before it is distributed, because if a government rushes one out for political purposes, you get well, Something Like whats happening in russia right now. Russias Health Ministry says the first batch of its socalled sputnik 5 Coronavirus Vaccine has been produced for use in the general population. Hell officials outside russia, however, have raids concerns that the shot was approved even before clinical testing had finished last week. Still not proven, havent finished human trials and widely distrusted. Its been made available to key front line workers like doctors and teachers. But few if any of the russian teachers have taken the vaccination. Today it is obvious for our scientists that this vaccine forms stable immune resistance. Antibodies appear in the blood just like in the case of my daughter and is harmless. My daughter feels well. Trevor yeah, guys. Of course, putins daughter feels well, she knows the consequences if she doesnt. Hey, maybe we dont need a vaccine at all. We just need putinish to shoe veiled threats to anyone who thinks they have covid. So do you have corona . I coughing mr. President. Isnt it surprising russians are hesitant to take the vaccine, but Russian National pride is on the line here which is probably why they started promoting this vaccine with a brandnew Public Service announcement. Are you tired of the wearies mask, are you tired of washing hands all day, are you afraid covid 19 will kill you before putin has a chance to . Then try mother russias new covid vaccine, sputnik 5, by scientists who brought nation many glorious gold medals. It is safe and effective. How do we know . Because it was test opened a bear by a scientist who is also a bear. Then we did Clinical Trials with many prisoners, and the vaccine did not kill any of the ones who survived. And if you are coward afraid of needles, then dont worry, we will just slip it into your tea. coughing sputnik 5, take now so you can enjoy last few weeks of russian summer. Trevor all right, we have to take a quick break but when we come back, ill be talking to the one and only Malcolm Gladwell. Stick around. Wedding day, huh boys . Been there, done that. Twice your cousin. From boston. Karen, im just gonna say what everyone here is thinking. You look smokin. Total smokeshow. And they never did find his finger. They had to close the pool for like an hour. I brought a date. Names sam. Dig in. Love is like boston lager. Rich, complex and its over too soon. Right, chrissy . Oh my god. I browsed eight sites for divorce attorneys today. I love working with you. Me too. Red heart emoji. Blue heart emoji. I hate lee though. Puke emoji. Puke emoji. My heart rat