Everyone Makes Mistakes, But The FBIâs Not Sure Pension Funds Make Such Convenient Ones Which is another way of saying, it thinks it might not be a mistake. Author: Which is another way of saying, it thinks it might not be a mistake. The Pennsylvania Public School Employees’ Retirement System needs to make money. Like, a lot of money. A lot more money, in fact, than the 7.25% it assumes it will make, if the $6.1 billion it’s gonna need from its younger teachers and taxpayers this year is any guide. This is why, over the last 13 years, PSERS has poured more and more of its money into hedge funds, private equity funds, prison payphone systems, Kurdish oil fields and many other things falling under the rubric of “alternative investments.” These now make up an absolute majority of the pension’s investments.