This is our market that will be great stand Lemonade Stand that took im trying to get the weird ones i got. Us four days to do i was just look at these i have all show stuff here colors are you kidding meught what woue oh, my god, khloe would kill still care for you me if i showed these tel jimmy come on. Fun is we could use it as a desk okay. Like daddys desk at work and i ill do a group one. Your brothers apartment when life was can read you some jokes. These ones arent that bad like a wishing wel you want to hear some jokes . Yeah. 4 00 am and raising hell damn i knew you oh so well but theyre like me and my friends. We have amazing show tonight. Never thought wed eve have t go without take you over this is like maybe 2009. Jimmy wow. Anybody else hands down Kim Kardashian west is my guest. Were the typ of melody well be zooming with her you really are going back there. That dont fade out dont fade ou those are high school ones. Cant fade out didnt didnt i talking about her new those are the best documentary on criminal Justice Reform and all the money she is lots of kids stuff giving to charity which is really awesome shes doing that. Lots of, like i went in the other room and my daughter then we have to talk to music dressed up my little daughter superstar jon bon jovi who is like that. With a wig on. Doing amazing stuff with soul she was Walking Around like that kitchen. Org. That is his charity that he is jimmy she looks like annie talking about today. Well be talking to jon about that and also his new song that honestly so fun getting to be with all the kids. They love it you can sing with him through. Youll see later in the show they think its the best thing ever didnt i love you then we have great music from jimmy my kids are having fun too. Didnt we didnt w one republic didnt we fly know that i im so happy you guys did that i ordered takeout from a local know that still care for you for us place trying to, you know, keep but didnt we didnt w the local restaurants in say goodbye didnt thank you so much, one republic. Didnt i didnt i love you didnt we brand new song from them from business and i got this package didnt w didnt we try their home last night i thought it will be kind of know that i know that still care for you it was my food but it came with a roll of toilet paper in the tell me why goo things have to die cool to do some jokes. Bag. We had our moment didnt we oh thats nice jimmy clever, right . So much that w so here we go. So generous lets get some news. Jimmy thank you, que pasa. Well in the crazy times, taco do you mind hanging out a couple more minutes bell announce theyre offering i want to talk to you about your documentary . For sure. Every american one free dorito okay. Cool taco experts are calling it not what more with Kim Kardashian when we we need during a National Toilet come back, to nenight show hoe edition. Paper shortage a nice hiss of the gas fireplace. Will never be oh didnt didnt i didnt i love you didnt we meanwhile, over in moscow, a didnt w didnt we fly citywide quarantine is imposed know that i where everyone will be trapped know that still care for you but didnt we didnt w say goodbye didnt didnt i by a smart Monitoring System and didnt i love you residence will need permission didnt we to leave their homes or as known didnt w didnt we try know that i know that still care for you tell me why goo in russia, monday. Things have to die some sports news, wimbledon tennis tournament will be canceled ooh ooh dont worry, if you still want to hear men and women grunting all day, look into the didnt i ooh ooh quarantine couple next door that wont stop earmuffs, you know so Business News as of friday, the Video Conferencing company zoom valued at more than 40 billion or roughly as much as uber which makes sense since theyre both places where uses have no idea how to mute themselves listen to this i heard a lot of people are doing virtual sessions with therapists they cant talk about their significant others how is your relationship you have to go its very good so some people have been posting throwback photos of themselves online its awkward when you comment, wow, you looked so young back then that was from two weeks ago. This isnt good. Last night a dutch museum said that a van gogh painting was stolen the Security Guard tried 60 of women wear the wrong u y fit stopping the thieves but he couldnt get within six feet of try the next size up and get up to 20 better coverage day or night because better coverage them means better protection always. According to a new study, a majority of medical marijuana is stronger than it needs to be for pain relief purposes can you read about it in the journal of the american narc physicians finally, the movie teenage mutant Ninja Turtles hit theaters 30 years ago today. And here we have another burst pipe in denmark. If you look close. Jamie, are there any interesting photos from your trip . They all wore masks, eat pizza ouch, okay. And hid and way from society basically, were all ninja huh, boring, boring, turtles now. Thank you very much. You dont need to see that. That is our monologue there, everybody. Oh, here we go. Can you believe my client steig had never heard hey, we want to check in on our of a home and auto bundle or that renters could bundle . Very good friend, one of my best friends. You know him, love him, steve wait, youre a lawyer . Higgins. He to check in on him only licensed in stockholm. Today. Hes doing great what is happening . Jamie anyway, game show, kumite, cinderella story. How is it going, snan. You know karate . No, alan, i practice muay thai, i miss your face. Completely different skillset. How you doing, buddy, you look great . Everything is good. I am totally blind. Everything is as good as can be. And non24 can make me show up too early. Or too late. Where are you no you . Where are you . Well, were at the house. Or make me feel like im not really there. The boys and i and ellen were staying at the house talk to your doctor, anna is staying in the city and call 8442342424. Nursing at mt. Sinai west. God bless her. How is she doing . I love anna so much. So proud of her, dude. Wethe conference room. Ore. She is just she says shes the speaker phone. Just exhausted every night the missing files. She just comes home and goes to sleep. Not in the room . Then youre not in the know. Goes back and wakes up goes back into work. And shes on the front line. Shes on the front lines for well, this has been nice, but can we not . Us, fighting for us. Microsoft teams invites everyone you work with to work together. Tell her im so proud of her, please give her my best be seen, be heard, be there when youre not. Share your files, and your opinion. And maybe even a happy little fruit guy. I know i used to call he when youre ready to unleash the power of your team, and your son is there as open teams. Well yeah, all three of them are here and then ellen is here and were just at the house trying to kind staying quarantined. But i tell you, watching you has made all our day its so fun. Dude im all over you. The kids are going to be kids okay, bud let me talk to jimmy for a second. Dad all right okay. All righty. Okay all right. Dad stop it all right stop okay. Okay everybody out. Okay. Im going to let you go, okay take care ill talk you to later on . Ill text you. And i got a text from steve hes going to be okay. The other night, i was listening to music with my wife during dinner as we always do some song sounds a little different now that there is a pandemic and one song i was playing i jimmy hey guys were back and im talking to thought of is one of my the one and only, Kim Kardashian west. Thank you so much for being here favorites by weird al yancovik called one more minute with me. Jimmy thank you guys so much it is the first concert. Live from my moms glam room, for watching cause i had thank you, Kim Kardashian west jimmy from your moms glam thank you, jon bon jovi. I went with my parents room thank you, onerepublic to keep away from my kids jimmy is that a painting thank you, weird al and thank and i just love that song. Behind you or is that a piece of fwz he doesnt want to spend one art . More minute with this person you state farm thats and i dont know. And what he would do instead of it looks like a kettle andnkno. Look at that, redcross. Org statefarm and jbjsoulkitchen. Org spending time with them. Really appreciate you guys watching our shows so i have no way of getting in wash your hands. Jimmy i think its dont touch your face. Touch with al. Ill see you tomorrow. We have new shows all this week. B thank you, thank you, thank you i text miranda y drawers if you want, just tons of make up [ laughter ] jimmy were in the glam room so much. Havent heard that, you have to yeah. List ebb its really great. Jimmy i want to talk to you yeah, i know al. About Kim Kardashian west, the justice project. I can hook you up. This is going to air sunday at so he hooked us up 7pm on oxygen. I sent texts i called what is this i wrote emails. So this is a documentary that i put up the al signal and i got in touch with him. I did, basically following my personal journey with justice i begged him to please play one reform more minute, my Favorite Song i started working with announcer tonight on late night with seth meyers, senator Bernie Sanders an all new closer look. From his album for our show and alice johnson, who after featuring the 8g band with fred armisen 22 years was released from he said yes. So he is not with his band prison from a president ial ladies and gentlemen, he figured out how to do it in pardon seth meyers. She had a low level drug offense seth welcome to late night, his house and worked tirelessly to make this everybody. How is everyone doing tonight . We love you, al. And so, i thought to myself already a little bummed out please welcome back to our show i was a bit judgmental and about that one friend whos thought to myself, okay, i can weird al yancovic. Handle supporting someone that going to come out of this thing super jacked and make you feel hey, jimmy, how you doing is nonviolent until i went to bad about how you didnt exercise once . Thanks for having me back on the yeah, me too show go visit prisons in that case lets get to the and i started to meet with so news you know i wont swear to it but many people that are President Trump tweeted four i think this is the first time incarcerated, that shared their ive done the tonight show times over the weekend, quoting wiout wearing pants. Stories with me and explained to me that, maybe when they were a New York Times article about fourteen years o t hopefully its not the last time the High Television ratings for heres the song you wanted me to Daily Press Conferences about perform. Its one of my favorites the coronavirus pandemic its an oldie. Hey, man, were not tuning in to hear from you. Were tuning in to hear from dr. Fauci. Its sort of about social hes the ross and rachel of this distancing, kind of topical. Thing and you will always be the gunther. I dont know obviously my band is not here with me. President trump over the weekend asked the cdc to issue a strong travel advisory for new york, connecticut, and new jersey. So bad news if you wanted to see so were going to do it like the empire sta b this well i heard that youre leaving leaving going to leave me far behind so far behind because you found a brand new lover you decided that im not your kind so i pulled your name out of my rolodex and i tore all your pictures in two and i burned down the shop where we used to go just because it reminds me of you thats right you aint going to see me cryin im glad that you found somebody new because i got an eternity of broken glass than spend one more minute with you i guess i might seem kind of bitter got me feeling down in the dumps because im stranded all alon in the gas station of love seh service pump so honey let me help you with that suitcase you aint going to break my heart in two because id rather get 100,00 paper cuts on my face than spend one more minute with you id rather rip out my intestines with a fork than watch you going out with other men id rather slam my fingers in a door again and again and again and again cant you sigh what im trying to say dar lyn out by leeches drive an ice pick under a toe nail or two id rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central station with my tongue than spend one more minute with id rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumb tacks or stick my nostrils together with crazy glue id rather dive into a Swimming Pool filled with double edged razors than spend one more minute with you id rernlg rip my heart out o my chest and throw oint the floor and stomp on it until i die than spend one more minute with you i love you, buddy stay safe. Thank you, al well be right back with more tonight show at home edition i am totally blind. And non24 can throw my days and nights out of sync, keeping me from the things i love to do. Has the right to pizza night. Pizza which is why our pizza is cooked at 475 degrees, never touched after and available by noncontact carryout and free delivery. Peace of mind, always. Actually dry . Lets see. Its dry. Theres no dry time makes us wonder. Why we booked fifteensecond. Ad slots dries instantly and. Keeps you protected for fortyeighthours. Keeping our customers, employees, and communities safe. Ad slots dries instantly and. During these Uncertain Times we want you to get the Great Service you expect without leaving the safety of your home. Sprint. Com makes shopping easier by offering free next day shipping and no activation fees on our best new phone deals, like the amazing iphone 11 for just 15 a month when you switch. For now sprint. 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Were offering Payment Options for current owners and for future owners, were offering no payments for 90 days on 14 models. This is help when you need it. I want to catch up with Kim Kardashian west who is actually somewhere in l. A well find out about, her new documentary that comes out this sunday at 7 00 on oxygenewith k kardashian west. Hi. Hi. Thank you for doing this. I appreciate this. You look great where are you and what room is this im in my moms glam room kylie did my makeup an i dont have anyone to do it and im not that good so she did all my make yurp i was so impressed good job, kylie and then thats the first time ive seen her the whole family is distancing so we havent even seen each other. Zb really . I snuck out and im at my moms house because there say door from the outside. So this is all shell let us in. The i had to get away from my kids jimmy just a break take one little break. I see the post on instagram where you were asking people what can you do with your kids did you get a lot of advice or no no. Everyone was like you have everything at your house they shouldnt be bored. And i was like, no jimmy no kids get bored oh, my gosh. Im running out of things. Weve done everything from, like edible slime which is hello . To now that its spring break now but we have school usually so to be the teacher to four young kids, well, two are in school two is like insanity jimmy i just did it today. Im like hiding from them jimmy its i just did it. We were there this morning im learning spanish again i go oh, my gosh and shes only 6 years old yeah. Same my daughter is 6 its like then they have to stop for pe. They have to go run up and down in the backyard. Or they do these, like this yoga pokemon yoga jimmy yeah, im doing yoga too. Its insane they love to make forts. So every room in the house is like a different fort. Jimmy forts everywhere in my house too. All my tables are turned into forts. Yeah. Jimmy today we made play dough. Wow jimmy everything is blue in the house after that what movies and tv shows are you watching anything good that i should check out . Kanye has now fully hes watched everything that he is now into foreign films so he watched everything with every subtitle you know, he will stay up all night watching movies. I have tried to get the kids to watch other movies other than just cartoons. We watched harry and the hendersons yes, like old, like 80s movies that i grew up on. They love them jimmy i love that. John lithgow, right . Yeah. They loved it. Jimmy so good. I have to watch my kids watch that we watched onward we cant wait for trolls jimmy yeah, were all excited about all that stuff i tried west world i have to get back into. I missed like half of the last season and now im totally lost. Thats what kanye said, he missed last season and tried to get into the new season and he was totally lost so he has to go back and start over but thats keeping him pretty occupied jimmy what is your show . Im loving oh, my god, love is blind and tiger king. I have not watched love is blind. You have to like i wasnt that kind of girl. And i just really got into it to the point where i started watching it before we were all social distancing. So we were filming our show and they couldnt find me. Where is kim shes been gone for an hour. Episode of love is blind. Jimmy really yeah. Jimmy tiger king, i got depressed. Its too depressing for me i got out after two episodes. Yeah. You have to continue though. Jimmy real. I you have to continue so many twists and turns and its crazy jimmy what a time for your show to come back. Everyones thanking you for that keeping up with the kardashians. You are filming now . We a