Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, stephen welcomes Maggie Gyllenhaal. Graham norton. And musical guests lukas nelson promise of the real. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen thank you. Thank you very much. Whats going on . Thanks, everybody. Thanks for being here. Welcome to the late show im your host, Stephen Colbert. This is our first show back after a twoweek break. Before we go on, i just want to say our hearts go out to all those affected by Hurrican Harvey in houston. But, also, money can go out to them. And if you want to give and i know you do we have a list of organizations ready to help on our website colbertlateshow. Com. Personally, my family is giving to the fund set up by the mayor of houston, sylvester turner, at the Greater Houston Community foundation. But there are a lot of good options out there so go check them out. A week from tonight, next tuesday, all the networks will be broadcasting a fundraising telethon, hand in hand, benefiting those affected by hurricane harvey. Please watch, please give, please remember these people. Because its not going to go away for them for a long time. Please, lets just take a moment take a moment right now to give thanks to all the First Responders, the volunteers, and the aid workers who are down there helping right now as we speak. Thank you so much. Thank you for what youre doing. applause and harvey is an unprecedented disaster. Im clear in saying that. Thats true, right . Speaking of unprecedented disasters, donald trump. laughter he went down to texas and had a little trouble nailing the comforterinchief tone, like when he spoke to a group of locals and said, what a crowd, what a turnout. laughter that crowd was really excited to see donald trump. Or they heard thered be drinking water. Either way, pretty excited. And take a look at where trump was giving this speech it looks like hes barricaded himself from zombies. Theyre after my brain. Theyre after my delicious brain. In fact laughter in fact, fire wont stop them. In fact, according to reporters on the scene, the president didnt meet a single storm victim, see an inch of rain, or get near a flooded street. Audience booo stephen i know, it was surprising. It was surprising. Hes been closer to a flood in a Russian Hotel room. And the president im right saying that. applause thats alleged. Im right in saying that. And the president told hud secretary ben carson just how impressed he was with this terrible storm. There has never been anything so historic in terms of damage and ferocity as what we witnessed with harvey. Sounds like such an innocent name, ben, right . But its not innocent. Stephen yes, its not an innocent name. We have to stop naming storms after innocent people. We have to name storms after guilty people so we know theyre bad like hurricane hitler, hurricane joe arpaio, or hurricane donald, for that matter. How hard is it its really part of the job that he evidently did not know. The leader comforts people in times of crisis. Look at the vice president. He nailed it on the first try. Donald trump, if you make me like mike pence, i will never forgive you. cheers and applause dont do it no so trump decided to take an emotional mulligan and went down to texas a second time. Here he is loading a truck with relief supplies on a separate trip. Cant screw that up. Lets take a look. Okay, hes got the bucket. Now just put in the back, and he just gave it to the driver theres a whole here you go, take this. Theres a whole back theres a whole empty truck bed back there. Thats why he brought a truck and not a unicycle. You dont check your luggage by handing it to the pilot of the plane. You with the hat and the wings, take these. Here, take these. Heavy luggage. Of course, every president ial visit to a disaster area must come with some inspiring words. As tough as this was, its been a wonderful thing, i think even for the country to watch, for the world to watch. Its beautiful. Have a good time, everybody. Im going to be doing a little help over here. Stephen have a good time, everybody . Have a good time . Thats the second worst Disaster Response of all time. Its bursting into flames. People are jumping. Oh, the humanity. Have a great time, everybody. laughter applause . Stephen thats based on a true story. N a true story. That joke that joke is based on a true story. While harveys a Natural Disaster that seems to be bringing people together, in very heartwarming ways, theres a manmade disaster unfolding in washington because the Trump Administration has announced theyre ending the deferred action for childhood arrivals program, or daca. Audience booo stephen yeah, yeah, youre not the only one. The thing is, the vast majority of americans like this program, so by canceling it, trump has stepped in some deep daca. laughter so even though his decision is unpopular, trump bravely stepped up, then cringed back, and had somebody else announce it. That someone was attorney general and turn up that learned to hate, Jeff Sessions. Im here today to announce that the program, known as daca, that was effectuated under the Obama Administration is being rescinded. Stephen i codeclare, it is being de, if eccutuated. We dont know why or whoall is rescinding it. Probably those nasty immigrant children. But as my mama used to say, life is like a box of chocolates. Now, get out of the country. its happening by somebody to somebody. I dont know. But sessions doesnt want you dreamers to take this personally. The nation must set and enforce a limit on how many immigrants we admit each year, and that means all cannot be accepted. This does not mean that they are bad people or that our nation disrespects or demeans them in any way. Stephen youre right, jeff deporting innocent children does not mean theyre bad people. It means youre a bad person. And heres the deal these dreamers, they arent the only ones being hurt. In fact, a recent study estimated that terminating daca would cost the federal government 60 billion and would reduce Economic Growth by 280 billion in the next ten years. Wow, trump really is a dealmaker. Ill trade you 800,000 productive young people and wait 280 billion for. Nothing. Final offer. Take it or leave it. Thats it, okay. applause im walkin so, the move is incredibly unpopular, but trump is gearing up to hand off the problem to someone else. Earlier today, he tweeted, congress, get ready to do your job. Daca he loves the abbreviations. Daca maga maga daca hes speaking in tongues at this point is what is happening. Now, trump did release a statement. As president , my highest duty is to defend the American People and the constitution of the United States of america. At the same time, i do not favor punishing children. Thats why all my children are spoiled monsters. laughter okay, sociopaths. Eat your tongue. applause but after a tepid press release and having Jeff Sessions make the announcement, the president realized he needed to step up personally and make Sarah Huckabee sanders talk about it. If congress doesnt want to do the job that they were elected to do, then maybe they should get out of the way and let someone else do it. Stephen like maybe the president with an executive order. You dumdum she clarified exactly how the repeal of daca will take place. Rather than leave daca recipients, and the men and women of immigration enforcement, in confusing limbo while the daca program was challenged by states, in the same court that struck down another of the previous administrations unlawful immigration orders earlier this year, president obama is laying out a responsible 24month phaseout sorry, President Trump. laughter applause stephen its ok. Jon whoa oh stephen its ok. Were sorry hes president , too. laughter applause now, did. cheers and applause okay, trump did eventually get around to publicly addressing the fears this will cause for the dreamers. We have a great heart for the folks were talking about, a great love for them. Stephen and you know what they say if you love something, set it free. Then lock the door when its gone. But trump also made sure everybody was aware just who we were talking about. People think in terms of children, but theyre really young adults. Stephen yeah, sure, they were brought here when they were babies, but that was 20 years ago. If they wanted to stay in america, they should have stayed kids their whole lives. If bart simpson can do it, so can you, pedro weve got a great show for you tonight. Maggie gyllenhaal is here. But when we come back. The smartphone. Me to re snap on a speaker. A projector. A camera that actually zooms. Get excited world. The new moto z with moto mods. Buy the new moto z and youll get a free projector mod. The new moto z with moto mods. Ladies and gentleman this is a robbery. What are you doing after this . Looking for adventure this labor day . Holy smokes. Oh man, thats pretty intense. Look no further than chevrolet. This is a fast car. I feel like i left my soul back there. Wow. This has power head to the chevy labor day sales event and ride out the summer in a new chevrolet. Now use labor day bonus cash to get fourthousand dollars total cash allowance on most Chevy Traverse models. Or, get 20 below msrp on select 2017 chevy models in stock. Find new roads at the chevy labor day sales event. To tinto a flamecker youll need a spark. New emergenc Energy Natural caffeine from green tea to focus your mind. 7 b vitamins plus vitamin c to fortify you. Spark the energy within you every day. Emergenc energy . Emerge and see. band playing cheers and applause Stephen Jon Batiste and stay human, everybody jon yeah stephen jon, you know, weve got another act of comedy coming up right now, but you know one of my favorite things i love doing on this show, we do it every week, we do it fridays. We do Stephen Colberts midnight confessions on the show. Its near and dear to my heart as a confession. And one of the things i cob fess right now is we have a brand new book. Stephen colberts midnight confessions. All right. All right. It is out today. This is the day that the book drops. Jon wow i got to see that. See what youre saying. Stephen its got everything you want in here. Its got drawings, its got pictures, its got jokes. Its got papers. It makes the perfect gift for anything coming up. Is anything coming up . Rosh hashanah. Its the perfect gift for the high holidays. Halloween, thanksgiving gift. Get this. Heres the first confession i havent read it yet. I hear its very good. All right, in other disturbing news that happened over the break while we were gone, this sunday, north korea tested its most powerful nuclear bomb yet, which they are claiming was a hydrogen bomb. You see, we discovered this explosion because it was so big, it created a 6. 3 tremor. A seismologist whose job is to monitor Nuclear Tests announced the test in scientific terms, possible, tweeting oh, bleep i want to tell you, i want to tell you, this seismologist clearly does not work for cbs. laughter lauz and, and to prove we keep it clean, right . We keep it clean. And to prove they have the hbomb, north korea released this picture verifying that either they have the bomb or kim jongun has gotten into home brewing. I hope not. After this terrifying Nuclear Escalation from north korea, President Trump struck right back at the heart of the enemy south korea launching this tweet south korea is finding, as i have told them, that their talk of appeasement with north korea will not work. They only understand one thing is it parades . God, i hope its parades. Mr. President , you know south korea is our ally, right, and theyre the ones in danger . It might not be the best time to be picking petty fights. South korea, so stupid. Why did they choose to be right next to north korea . Also, why did they pick the same name . Not smart who do i bomb . I dont know. Its a coin toss at this point. South korea. There are other names out there. West japan. Jon doesnt really matter. Stephen baby china. laughter applause the place where hawkeye went. But trump made the ultimate threat. The United States is considering, in addition to other options, stopping all trade with any country doing business with north korea. Now, of course, the country that does almost all the business with north korea is china. So any sanctions could really hurt for the company who makes ivankas shoes. Its true. Theyre lovely, theyre lovely, jon. Theyre lovely. But by ramping up pressure on north korea, trump might be hurting his greatest ally of all Vladimir Putin who says that cutting off trade would have no effect, because north korea would rather eat grass than suspend their nuclear program. To which north koreans responded, wait, theres grass . where is the grass . And putin seemed to even slam trump directly, saying difficult to have a dialogue with people who confuse austria and australia. Wow. Oh snap jon snap. Stephen that is unfair. Okay. Trump does not confuse austria and australia. He thinks theyre the same place. Gday mate, throw another mozart on the harpsichord well be right back with the star of hbos the deuce, Maggie Gyllenhaal. applause when i walked through a snowstorm for a cigarette, thats when i knew i had to quit. For real this time. Thats why im using nicorette. Only nicorette gum has patented dualcoated technology for great taste, plus intense craving relief. Every great why needs a great how. girl . On it. Found it imitating explosion okay, so lets. Stop. Dont mess it up squeaking ahhhh eeee all right. chuckle nice come on, dad, lets go for those who know what theyre really building. Always unstoppable. band playing cheers and applause stephen welcome back, everybody. Ladies and gentlemen, you know my first guest from the dark knight and secretary. She now stars in the hbo series the deuce. Please welcome Maggie Gyllenhaal applause stephen hey. Hey. Stephen nice to see you again. Nice to see you, too. Stephen weve met a cowl of times, but ive never had a chance to interview you before, even though we were in the same movie once together. What movie were we in. Stephen the great new wonderful. But did we act stephen were going to do a scene. I came over and said hi to you on the daily show sm of the. You didnt come over. You didnt come over. You were leaning back with your coffee and the kitchen park you walk through before you go on stage and you were like, ive got a new show. Stephen this was in 2005, this was in 2005. And you said, will you come by on my show . And i said, yes, i will. But then actually, i was on your show. Did you know that. Stephen you performed. I was the musical guest with the movie frank, and we were a kind of odd, not totally great stephen i didnt interview you, no. When i said i wanted you on my show, here we are. I am actually a really big fans of yours which is why i think im nervous tonight is there youre nervous . I was trying to figure out why am i so nervous, back there. Ive done this before. Its because im a fan of yours. I think youre awesome. Stephen thats nice. I think youre awesome, too. Thank you very much. Sip of water . Now i have interviewed your brother. Okay. Stephen and we do not rank gyllenhaals here, we love them equally. But youre the better gyllenhaals, arent you . Youre the better one. Who was the better kid between the two of you . Was there a better child . Was there a democraton child and a good child . Jake was a demon child. No, really, he was. And then i got naughty later. laughter . Stephen is there is there any proof that you got naughty later . Like, in what way . You were troublesome, troublesome to your parents. Thankfully there wasnt internet them. No, my brother was really troublesome when he was little. Yeah, he got in trouble a lot. Stephen strong headed . Yeah, and like a wild kid. Stephen i have older sisters, i have self of them, and my sister lulu can tell me what to do, and shell say it and ill to it. So my family knows to teller her if they want me to do something. Can you tell jake what to do . Will he listen to you . Maybe, maybe a little bit, maybe a little bit. Stephen you can say, explain johnny darko. Have him on the show, sit right here and ill say, explain johnny darko. Stephen you live in brooklyn. Youre kind of the epitome of brooklyn, actually, independent artist. You what, actually, i was shooting a movie in brooklyn, on the street my mom grew up on. Stephen thats lovely, thats lovely. Yeah. And i told her, im on rugby road. And she said, and rita my great aunt lived right down the street. Stephen thats really street. Thats really nice. Did you spend all summer there . Did you get away. Were at the end of summer, unfortunately. Did you do anything fun . I shot a movie, a teenytiny, gorilla style, changing my clothes in a ferry on staten island. Stephen wow, thats very brooklyn of you. laughter . Huh . Im going to take that home and think about what that means. Stephen thats like making a movie, like canning your own pickles were doing it ourselves. Somebody told you i make elderberry spirit, didnt they. Stephen yes. I made failed elderberry syrup. Stephen where does one get elderberry to begin with . I got them in the woods where i was the past few weeks. This is all new for me. Like canning, making elderberry stephen i heard rose hip, tea, too. Yes. Stephen did you gather your own rose hip . Yes. Stephen you could kill yourself. I wouldnt recognize a rose hip if it slapped me. Listen, i put a picture of rose hips drying, trying to, lying, be the person who knows how to do that. And somebody on instagram, and somebody wroa wroet he and said, be careful of the seeds. Theyre poisonous. And i was like, oh, okay. I didnt know that. And so stephen someone saved your life. Yeah, i need to go slow, i think. I need to go slow. Stephen the new series is called the deuce, on hbo. Yeah. Stephen created by david simon. And george pellicano. Stephen what is the deuce . Its a nickname for times square, and the show is about the birth of the porn industry in the 70s, which really started in times squ