Say that because i was there when he didnt say it. I also want to deny rumors that Rex Tillerson is the author of this joke, knock, knock. Whos there . Moron. Moron who . Moron that later. Trump say moron. Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, tillerson drops an m bomb. Tonight, stephen welcomes Kerry Washington. Russell brand. And musical guest st. Vincent. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen wow, wow. You knocked it out. Hey, everybody thanks very much. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, i have some shocking news. Theres chaos in the trump white house. laughter i didnt know there were enough people left to qualify for chaos. laughter horse play, yes. Grabass you bet. Chaos seems ambitious at this point. It all started this morning, when nbc news reported that, over the summer, secretary of state and spokesmodel of just for eyebrows, Rex Tillerson, openly disparaged trump by referring to him as a moron after a meeting at the pentagon. Hold on there, rex hold on there, tillerson nobody calls our president a moron except me cheers and applause and other World Leaders and, ultimately, history. laughter but, heres the deal why would tillerson say such a vicious, accurate thing about his boss . laughter well, apparently tensions came to a head around the time trump delivered a politicized speech to the boy scouts, an organization tillerson once led. Thats what made him mad laughter saying theyre fine people at a nazi rally . Eh. Giving golf trophies to hurricane victims . Sure. But the jamboree is sacred. laughter tillerson was proud to be the leader of the boy scouts. Do we have a photo . There he is there he is, sitting next to the nations most powerful butterscotch baron. Yes. Of course, donald trump is dealing with huge issues right now puerto rico, las vegas, sadly, north korea so, naturally, he kept his eye on the ball and let this tillerson story pass. Im just kidding. laughter this morning, he tweeted, nbc news is fakenews and more dishonest than even cnn. They are a disgrace to good reporting. No wonder their news ratings are way down yes. it gets you. It gets you. You know, whats lovely is in times of trouble, donald trump is always there for himself thoughts and prayers to the black hole in my heart that will never be filled, and is the shape of my daddy. The theory being his father did not love him when he was younger and were paying the price. Then, hours later, tillerson mysteriously and we dont know why, totally unrelated to donald trump decided to hold an impromptu press conference. He began by declaring his love for his job. First, my commitment to the success of our president and our country is as strong as it was the day i accepted his offer to serve as secretary of state. Stephen well, there it is. And we all know what he said when trump made him the offer i didnt want this job. My wife told me im supposed to do this. laughter it is going to be an awkward night at the tillerson house. Honey, can you pass the potatoes, or is there another moron youd like me to work for . laughter then tillerson went on to refute the story. To address a few specifics that have been erroneously reported this morning the Vice President has never had to persuade me to remain a secretary of state, because i have never considered leaving this post. Stephen considered leaving this post . No. Dreamt about it . Yes. Fantasized about it while i pleasured myself in an overstuffed chair . No comment. And and its a hard one to shake off. And as for his opinion of donald trump, tillerson made that clear. Let me tell you what ive learned about this president , whom i did not know before taking this office. He loves his country. He puts americans and america first. Hes smart. He demands results wherever he goes, and he holds those around him accountable for whether theyve done the job hes asked them to do. Stephen for instance, he makes them hold uncomfortable press conferences after he finds out they called him a moron. Very thorough. cheers and applause jon he holds it together. Stephen thats what it does. What it does. So thats it. Rex tillerson stood in front of the nation and vouched for Donald Trumps intelligence. Which means he categorically denies the moron thing, right . Can you address the main headline of the story, that you called the president a moron . And if not, where do you think these reports are im just im not going to deal with petty stuff like that. I mean, this is this is what i dont understand about washington. Stephen yeah, he totally said it. laughter i dont know. But, but, heres the thing trump felt totally vindicated, tweeting i agree with the president. Nbc news does owe us an apology because, apparently, tillerson didnt call our president a moron. He called him a bleep moron. laughter cheers and applause i never thought id say this, but secretaries of state, theyre just like us. And this afternoon, tennessee senator tennessee senator bob corker explained why it was so important that tillerson did not resign. I think secretary tillerson, secretary mattis, and chief of staff kelly are those people that help separate our country from chaos. laughter stephen what wait, youre saying this isnt chaos yet . This is just forplay to chaos. How will i know when the chaos starts . Is it frogz . Is it locusts . Is it going to rain blood . And i wouldnt blame tillerson if if he did quit. On saturday tillerson reassured us very reassuring. We are probing, so stay tuned is what my doctor says at minute 31 of my annual checkup. laughter just stay tuned. Watch the tv. Keep your eyes on the tv while i, uh, while i continue probing. laughter now, trump immediately undercut him, tweeting, i told Rex Tillerson, our wonderful secretary of state, that he is wasting his time trying to negotiate with little rocket man dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, save your energy rex, well do what has to be done spoken like a true moron. laughter you realize sound like it a little bit. Jon a little bit. Stephen a little bit. Sir, do what has to be do what has to be done . You realize youre tweeting threats of nuclear war to a mad man remember what the father of the abomb, robert oppenheimer, said when he saw that first bomb go off now i am become death, frowny emoji. laughter now, this saber rattling by trump might sound nutty, but apparently nutty is exactly what trump wants, because we just learned that in our trade negotiations with south korea, trump is urging his staff to portray him as a crazy guy. Thats why trumps changing his hat to make pancakes tennis again. laughter its crazy. The hat. It doesnt make sense now. In fact, a lot of people are saying that trump wants our Foreign Policy to be good cop bad cop. I think its more like good cop insane president. Hey, look, look, im secretary of state. Let me help you. You want a glass of water . A sandwich . Lets talk about ending your nuclear program. Listen, son, youd better deal with me, because my partners off the rails. I dont know if youve heard, but hes a bleep moron. cheers and applause weve got a great show for you tonight. Kerry washington is here. Stick around. When youre close to the people you love, does psoriasis ever get in the way of a touching moment . If you have moderate to severe psoriasis, you can embrace the chance of completely clear skin with taltz. Taltz is proven to give you a chance at completely clear skin. With taltz, up to 90 of patients had a significant improvement of their psoriasis plaques. In fact, 4 out of 10 even achieved completely clear skin. Do not use if you are allergic to taltz. Before starting you should be checked for tuberculosis. Taltz may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. Tell your doctor if you are being treated for an infection or have symptoms. Or if you have received a vaccine or plan to. Inflammatory bowel disease can happen with taltz. Including worsening of symptoms. Serious allergic reactions can occur. Nows your chance at completely clear skin. Just ask your doctor about taltz. Nows your chance at completely clear skin. This is goits got theni. Google assistant in it. So its super helpful. Watch this, hey google good morning. Google home good morning, claire. Its 72 and sunny. Dont forget to wear some sunscreen. Oh, thats nice. Itll also read you the news, look up traffic and tell you. Gh your first meeting is at 9am. And you know how sometimes youre in bed and you cant get out of it until you hear that one song that gh ok, playing your get out of bed playlist. [song plays] yeah, it can do that too. Its Google Home Mini and the rest of the google home family. Hungry eyes one look at you and i cant disguise ive got hungry eyes applebees 2 for 20. Now thats eatin good in the neighborhood. Applebees 2 for 20. Use pantene shampoo together with 3 minute miracle daily conditioner. Their prov formula is like a multivitamin. Making your hair 2x stronger see the difference when you add 3 minute miracle daily conditioner. Be smart and get the new iphone 8 from sprint hey jimmy, wheres your iphone season spirit . Youll get the best price for unlimited and Network Reliability within 1 of the other guys. Im going to sprint get the new iphone 8 for 0 per month. Plus, upgrade to the latest iphone anytime with iphone forever. band playing cheers and applause Stephen Jon Batiste and stay human right there cheers and applause my goodness. Folks, we have been having fun for the last week with this little thing were doing on twitter called puberme. Were raising money for puerto rico Hurricane Relief through something called oneamericanappeal set up to help people of texas and florida and puerto rico. And you can make your donations if you want by going to oneamericaappeal. Org, and give generously to the hurricaneravaged areas of the United States including our friends, our neighbors, our fellow americans down in puerto rico. One of the things that happened was last week with the puber me thing is nick kroll was on here with his show, talking about his show big mouth, which is on netflix about going through puberty. And he asked me to put up a picture of myself when i was going when i was going through puberty. laughter im not sure if im going through puberty here, but my neck tie is. The neck tie looks like its on viagra. Im not sure whats going on there. I said lets get some celebrities to join in and do this too. And for every celebrity that tweets themselves with pubeme, for puerto rico relief, we will give 1,000 from my americone Ice Cream Fund to oneamericaappeal. And we have amazing offers. Who do we have going on here . This one i love. We just got this one yesterday, i think. This is one celebrity out there. This is . William shatner. cheers and applause as a 12yearold. Hear adolescent captain kirk looks like he just battled a pubescent gorn. All right, look it up. laughter lets see. I love this. Guess if you can see who is this . Anybody . Alana glazer right there. And here shes saying, yes, tween this one, this ones pretty excited exooiting. See if you can guess who this is, jon . Jon aaaah stephen thats our friend, jon batiste. cheers and applause jon yes i know that kid. Stephen this is what jon looked like. This is what you looked like on our very first show. Jon yeah, yeah. Stephen doing 200 shows a year takes its toll. Jon yeah, thats right, thats right. Stephen this one i just this one literally just came in, like, an hour ago or Something Like that. This was just this afternoon. Okay, this is William Jefferson clinton right there. Looking pretty cool, leaning up against the car. Can you get in closer than that . Can you get even closer to that, show that . Thats either bill clinton or fat baby elvis. Not sure. Either one. Its an honor. Either one of those, its an honor. And the last one i have here, this isnt actually a celebrity, but i want to show this one because it says here, im not a celebrity, but ive been told im Stephen Colberts longlost sister. Does that count . Lets attack a close enough shot. Yes. I dont think her name is veronica, and i dont think she looks like my sister. I think she looks like shes my me. Veronica, congratulations on looking look a celebrity, and condolences on that celebrity being me. So anyway, if you want to go out there and help, please go to a1americaappeal. Org. There is still time to make donations. Unfortunately there will be a long time to make those donations. Were getting close to a total. Tomorrow we will have the toilgt number of celebrities giving 1,000. And were in the hundreds at this point, right . Were in the hundreds of celebrities. applause its a lot of ice cream. Thats a lot of ice cream. Yeah. Its a lot of ice cream. Remember to please go get my ice cream, Stephen Colberts americone dream. Remember, the bigger your ass, the more love youre showing. Well be right back with Kerry Washington. Starbucks narino 70 cold brew coffee. In stores now. Only at starbucks. People spend less time lying awake with aches and pains with advil pm than with tylenol pm. Advil pm combines the number one pain reliever with the number one sleep aid. Gentle, nonhabit forming advil pm. For a healing nights sleep. Directv has been rated 1 in Customer Satisfaction over cable for 17 years running. But some people still like cable. Just like some people like banging their head on a low ceiling. Drinking spoiled milk. Camping in poison ivy. Getting a papercut. And having their arm trapped in a vending machine. But for everyone else, theres directv. For 1 rated Customer Satisfaction over cable switch to directv. Call 1800directv. But when we brought our daughter home, that was it. Now i have nicoderm cq. The nicoderm cq patch with unique extended release Technology Helps prevent your urge to smoke all day. Its the best thing that ever happened to me. Every great why needs a great how. So if you have a sink, and the ship is sinking, is it a sinking sink . Scrubbing bubbles toilet gel, freshens and cleans with every flush. Spend less time cleaning, and more time thinking about the important things. Sc johnson jack this ridiculously long table in the middle of nowhere . Jack to invite all my friends in the industry to try this. Jack fast foods first ever ribeye burger. Jack made with 100 ribeye beef, grilled onions, a red wine glaze and creamy havarti cheese. Jack ahh, here comes the competition now. Jack and of course, since they work for my competitors, ive obscured their identities jack except for this guy. Jack he is so screwed. Jack try my new havarti grilled onion and allamerican ribeye burgers. band playing cheers and applause stephen hey, everybody, welcome back to the show. Ladies and gentlemen, you know my first guest as a washington fixer named olivia pope, on the hit show scandal. How is the president . Melee is good. So mel sein formation happy to let you hold all the information, hold all the cards. Millie and i are a team. You have never played team sports, not well, anyway. Dad, its my turn. Im changing the rule. This is, what im doing, is better. laughs . You are like looking into the wendo of my past. Are you me, no matter how much i tried, all i could create was me. Stephen welcome Kerry Washington applause cheers and applause stephen suddenly feels look a party. It is a Party Stephen nice to see you again. Its so nice to see you. Thank you for having me. Stephen welcome back east. Thank you, thank you, my home town. Stephen home town, like grew up here home town. Yeah, boogie down bronx. Oh stephen when you were a kid, were you one of those kids i see around new york off by themselves, wandering the city, going to school back and forth by themselves . As a parent, i would be too nervous to let my child do that. I grew up at the height of the crack epidemic in new york, and i, at five years old, asked my mother if i could walk to school by myself. And my mother is such an amazing human being she said yes. Stephen at five. But she hid behind cars while i was walking to school so i could think i was independent but she was like super mom, protecting me behind every corner. Isnt that so sweet. Stephen is there any chance shes in the studio right now . I think she is. Stephen make sure you are okay. Yeah, she probably is. Stephen so i i started off my career in chicago, which is, you know, its a big city and its tough enough to, like, act, and, like, make a living there. New york must have been so much harder when you were a young actress. I always wanted to know, like, what did you do to get by . Like, what were the jobs you were doing . I had a couple of gigs. A worked at a restaurant, like most actors. Stephen thats classic. I taught yoga. Stephen that is not as classic. And i also was a substitute teacher for new york city public schools. Yeah, yeah, give it up for teachers. They are our most important members of society. Stephen was this like, how much warning do you have . Is it like a fireman where you have it was the perfect job for an actor because you get a call in the morning saying, we need a teacher. If i had an audition, i wouldnt go, but if i didnt have an audition, which was most days i would go and work in school. In chicago i got a job in a movie called save the last dance. It was my first big film and it did not pay a lot of money so after the film came out, i went back to substitute teaching. I made a rule i couldnt work in high school. I could only do Elementary Schools because kids were cutting class to see shanneal teach ference. And i would say the kids trying to see the girl from save the last dance which was terrible. Stephen which is more cutthroat, high school or hollywood . High school stephen okay. Yeah. Stephen okay. Or maybe im just not as equipped. High school prepared me for hollywood, yeah. Stephen uhhuh, uhhuh. Nothing is as scary as the real world right now. Stephen oh, no, right now . Yeah. Stephen oh, no, its chaos. Have you heard . laughter well, now so then youre in college. Okay, so youre in college. You went to George Washington . I did. Stephen lovely school, down in d. C. , an