audience reacts laughter whats your question . I announced were Going Forward with the second term, as you know. Okay. I would appreciate your help. Sorry, im losing you. Russia is going through a tunnel. Hello, hello. dial tone announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, a gam game of thrones plus stephen welcomes Russell Crowe and musical guests the raconteurs, featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause band playing stephen whoo thank you please have a seat thank you so much for being here, everybody what a lovely, lovely dpreeting you gave me. So happy youre all here. Welcome to the late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause for weeks now, the Trump Administration has been trying to get the American Public on board with the idea of war with iran. You can hear the drumbeat, but so far, nobodys dancing. Maybe theres a good reason, but theyre not sharing it with us. For instance, somebody attacked two oil tankers in the gulf of oman. And now some of trumps team are reportedly pushing for war, Like National security advisor and statler and waldorfs love child, john bolton. laughter jon oh, wow. Wow. Stephen also, secretary of state mike pompeo, who went on the sunday shows to say he had proof it was iran. Theres no doubt. The Intelligence Committee has lots of data, lots of evidence. The world will come to see much of it, but the American People should rest assured we have high confidence with respect to who conducted these attacks. Stephen basically, trust us, but his boss just notched lie number 10,000. Thats like getting married and trusting your ringbearer to be gollum. laughter so happy. So trump is sending in more troops, hes already sent in a carrier group, hes figuring out where iran is on a map. as trump laughter a Firm Response is a good thing from the United States, but the worry is if you send more people into the area, you increase the chance that something bad happens, somebody makes a mistake and suddenly you end up at war. Well, the big news today is something bad happened, somebody made a mistake. Ill tell you all about it in our new, hopefully very shortlived segment, america at whaaa . laughter things escalated last night when iran shot down a u. S. Drone. Now, it was an unmanned drone just a piece of technology. This would be like declaring war over a downed washing machine. But it could happen. Remember, world war i started when an anarchist stole the kaisers toaster. laughter the two sides dont agree on the details. Ir rolutua sai it shot down an intruding american spy drone after it entered into the countrys territory, while u. S. Central command says, this was an unprovoked attack once but who are you going to believe, iran, or the u. S. Government. Is a question that used to be really easy to answer. laughter applause piano riff one thing they do agree on is the type of aircraft it was an rq4a global hawk highaltitude, long, endurance Unmanned Aircraft system. Hawk, high altitude, long endurance . Thats either a plane or spam mail for a boner pill. laughter make them say wow wow wow. laughter that is the laugh of recognition from people here. So what is the administration going to do . Well, today, the president was asked about the situation in the oval office. Mr. President , how will you respond . Youll find out. Are you willing to go to war with iran over this . Youll find out. Youll find out. Stephen well find out . This is an international conflict, not the Season Finale of the bachelor. laughter as trump denise, you get the rose. Iran, you get invaded. laughter trump was certain where the drone was when it was shot down this drone was in International Waters clearly, we have it all documented. Its documented scientifically, not just words. laughter stephen yeah, scientifically, john, scientifically, not just with words. Scientifically. Words arent science. Dont believe me . Just ask theoretical physicist albert mimestein. laughter piano riff but even though they have iran dead to rights with tons of evidence that they just cant show us right now, trump was in a forgiving mood. I think probably iran made a mistake. I would imagine it was a general or somebody that made a mistake in shooting that drone down. Stephen yes, trump understands that people make mistakes. After all, hes had three wives and eric. laughter applause piano riff trump also talked about iran last night during a phone interview with fox news pundit and face drawn on a thumb sean hannity. laughter as you look at the geopolitical work up there iran, russia, china, tell me your concerns. Dont worry about a thing. Stephen singing as trump s dont worry s cause every little thing is going to be a lie s laughter dont stop now band playing now stop. Now. laughter but the thing trump called in to brag about was his rally. Now, last night i showed you the footage that proved no overflow crowd was in the parking lot during trumps speech. So, naturally, trump lied about that, too. Outside there was thousands of people. We were asking people not to show up, we were saying please dont come. Stephen we were begging them not to come so hard that they heard us before we said it and they never showed up. So thats a win. laughter trump then talked about the feeling inside the definitely full stadium. The feeling was it was like love, but its love for what we are all about, the things we stand for. Stephen yes, they stand for love. Its why theyre always chanting, love her up, love her up laughter trump also compared it to football fans pregaming. It was in a way a Tailgate Party for the country. Not for a team although its a team when you think about it. Its a Tailgate Party for our country. Stephen its exactly like a Tailgate Party, lots of drinking and everyone is cheering for a 300 pound man with possible brain damage. cheers and applause how are ya . piano riff trump says his supporters werent the only ones enjoying the game. Even the enemies, and you know we have a lot of people that dont like us so much, you possibly have heard about that sean, im not sure mpliment. T have read about thata how do you like my new haircut . Ive never seen anything quite like it. laughter traits truly a new one. Of course, the democrats are already campaigning to replace trump. And the circular firing squad has begun. Ill tell you all about it in tonights doin it donkeystyle. Anyone but trump cheers and applause stephen were still 501 days from the election, but for the moment, the democratic frontrunner is former Vice President and man who just lost his fingers in a bologna slicer, joe biden. Biden spoke at a private fundraiser earlier this week and didnt want to demonize the wealthy and added that under his presidency, no ones standard of living will change, nothing will fundamentally change. Oh, it explains bidens inspiring update to obamas poster. laughter but the comments that really got biden in hot water were about his ability to work with people he disagrees with. Specifically, segregationists like mississippi senator james eastland. Eastland wasnt just some folksy uncle who occasionally made a racist remarks at thanksgiving. He was a staunch opponent of desegregation. He degraded black soldiers who fought in world war ii as physically and morally incompetent, was called the voice of the white south, and said the mississippi civil rights workers murdered in 1964 were just staging a publicity stunt. audience reacts listen, i get joe biden being proud of his ability to work with people he doesnt agree with. But he didnt have to pick this guy. I do a lot of volunteer work. Once, i painted a school with jeffrey dahmer. We fundamentally disagree about cannibalism, but the guy did bring his own lunch. laughter heres a Campaign Throwback from thursday. We got disappointing news about roy moore. If you dont remember moore, lucky you. He famously lost his senate race in 2017 after it came out he faced charges of sexually abused underaged girls. He was banned from the local mall. So i look forward to his campaign posters. Roy moore 2020, hey, can somebody hang this up in the mall for me . Very forgiving crowd. Very forgiving. Jon grace, grace and peace. Stephen fans of malls here tonight. At a press Conference Today in montgomery, alabama, moore made a big announcement. Yes, i will run for the United States senate in 2020. Stephen im surprised hes still interested in 2020. Hes known to be more into the teens. But dont worry, moore has learned from his past. When asked by journalists what hell do differently this time around, he replied, i would like to make more personal contact with people. Run, alabama lock your doors or hide in the mall, its the only place he cant get you we have a great show for you tonight. Russell crowe is here. cheers and applause but when we return, our real news tonight team went to tuesdays trump rally and brought back a special report. Stick around cheers and applause band playing its cedar plank seafood time at red lobster. Featuring three new dishes that are planked to perfection. Feast on new cedarplank lobster shrimp. Or new colossal shrimp salmon with a citrusy drizzle. Tender, smoky and together on one plank. But only till june 30th, so hurry in. Who used expedia to book the Vacation Rental that led to the ride which took them to the place where they discovered that sometimes a little down time can lift you right up. Flights, hotels, cars, activities, Vacation Rentals. Expedia. Everything you need to go. The best way to hit the beach . With neutrogena® beach defense® sunscreen. Helioplex® powered, uva, uvb strong. Beach strength protection for the whole family. For the best day in the sun. Neutrogena®. Look its a hmm. Whale. I dont know. Thats it. Suit up haha watch the fur ahhh. What do you see in your cheetos . Whoa. Travis in it made it. Its amazing. Oh is that traviss app . Its pretty cool, isnt it . Theres two of them. Theyre multiplying. No, guys, its me. See, im real. Im real he thinks hes real. Geico. Over 75 years of savings and service. Now we look good, right . Be in old navy, always oh, gingham and dots whats good here . Nothing, i just come for the outfits. All shorts, tees and dresses are on sale for fifty percent off thats fifty percent off now, at old navy. Ive been waiting my whole life for this. You ready . Are you . Woo. cheers and applause band playing stephen hey, welcome back give it up for jon batiste and stay human, everybody cheers and applause welcome back. Jon, you know, we have an amazing guest tonight. We have Academy Award winner Russell Crowe is here. cheers and applause and next week, wednesday and thursday, everybody, you want to tune in at the ensemble theater, were going to be live following the democratic debates on wednesday and thursday night. cheers and applause bring a pencil. You know, folks, as you know, trump officially kicked off his 2020 campaign tuesday in orlando, florida. His speech was a rambling hash of warmedover 2016 roadkill, and the media had one consistent criticism. In many ways, it is as if president trumps 2016 Campaign Never ended. There were a lot of the same messages, same themes, same targets as 2016. The hats were the same. The Campaign Slogan was the same. The playlist was virtually the same. It was a repeat of 2016. Stephen a repeat of 2016. Remember how shocking it was when we thought we knew who was going to win, and it turned out to be moonlight instead of lala land . laughter it was a fun year. I know trump dismisses any criticism from the media as fake news, which is why we have our own inhouse news team, real news tonight. Jim anchorton and jill news lady dedicated to giving the president the kind of news he wants to hear on the tv. And since our reporters, Jim Anchorton and jill newslady, are such huge fans of trump, we sent them to orlando and they filed this story that the Mainstream Media doesnt want you to see. Hello and welcome to a special onlocationo version of real news tonight, im Jim Anchorton. Im jill news lady. I wish you could feel the excitement. Stephen still many more hours before he arrives but we wish you could be here to feel the excitement. Excited . Damn right. Best president were ever had. Hell, yeah, were trying to do the real news. A lot of fake news out there. Oh, you fox . No, real news. Heard of broadcasting . Were narrow casting. Damn right. Oh, sorry. No, you can say that, we only err on gas pumps, so okay. What do you think his chances are. I believe its over 50 . I dont believe the polls. Do you trust the news media . Of course not. neath door i. I hate myself. You excited about trumps second term . Hell, yeah second term whoo third term whoo fourth term whoo fifth term whoo what do you think about this chant, hey hey, hoa, hoa, lock up Hillary Clinton . I love it. So in. Hey, hey, hoa, hoa, lock up Hillary Clinton hey, hey, hoa, hoa, Hillary Clinton should be arrested help help keep walking, buddy. If the russians affected our election then how the trump the president . Damn straight. But became the president anyway, so the russians ought to be completely retarded if they helped him but he still lost the popular vote. The only reason he won was our Electoral College system. Neither of you gentlemen has brought up Hillary Clintons emails. Why arent we talking about Hillary Clinton . Boo boo blame this rain on iran. All right, weve got shirts for you to take a look at. What do you think . Ill look at anything. Fortyfifth president is greater than 16 year . Hes the 45th president. Oh, 16th president. Do you know who the 16t 16th president is . Id feel pretty stupid with the graphic on there if i answered wrong. It was washington. Yeah. How you doing . The first republican president , abraham lincoln, attending a republican rally supporting the president ial nominee for a second term, the honorable mr. President donald trump. You think ivanka trump is really hot, right . I dont look at ivanka trump. Youre on stage you have to answer honestly. I dont look at her as a female, i look at her as the president s wife. laughter whats up, bros . If you could choose to be with trump tonight instead of your husband and be trumps not even wife, lets just say side piece, would you take that deal . Yes, absolutely. Who wouldnt. If i got work done, do you think i stand a chance at being trumps fourth wife . If you got a lot of Plastic Surgery . Thats right. Would probably increase your chances a little bit. Thats what i thought. America is for everybody, right . Correct, yes, sir. Except for the mexicans, right . No, theres no except for nobody. I dont care if youre africanamerican, mexican, caucasian, its youre very p. C. For a guy born in the 1800s. I dont know what p. C. Stands for, sir. Pretty cute. . Well, thank you, sir. Couple of little questions. Did you guys read the Mueller Report . A little bit of it. No, i did not. Why do you think Robert Mueller is such a little bitch . I call him a putz, thats all i can tell you. We left our stuff with coat check and went inside. Its about to go down n a few minutes trump is going to be speaking on that stage right there. Aaahhh here he comes here he comes good evening, Orlando Melania is talking right now. He truly loves this country and will continue to work on your behalf. Shes real. If we have about three or four empty seats, the fake news will say, headlines, he didnt fill up the arena, you know. Not an empty seat in the house applause by the way, that is a lot of fake news back there. booing our economy is the envy of the world, perhaps the greatest economy weve had in the history of our country. And we will again for real news today im jill news lady. And im Jim Anchorton. We saw our hero i know stephen thanks, guys well be right back with Russell Crowe cheers and applause band playing this is the ocean. Just listen. vo theres so much we want to show her. We needed a car that would last long enough to see it all. avo subaru outback. Ninety eight percent are still on the road after 10 years. Come on mom, lets go what would i say to somebody living with hiv . Keep being you. Keep loving. Keep aspiring. Keep striving. And ask your doctor about biktarvy. Biktarvy is a complete onepill, onceaday treatment used for hiv in certain adults. Its not a cure, but with one small pill, biktarvy fights hiv with three different medicines to help you get to undetectable. That means the amount of virus is so low it cant be measured in lab tests. So keep pushing. Keep creating. And keep pouring your soul into everything you do. 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