Defense secretary techniques as mixed messages. Were ready for war we dont want war were ready to strike we dont want to strike you do the hokeypokey and you turn yourself around. Thats what its all about. Persuading allies. Sorry what we said about nato. Angela merkel, looking good. Is that a new pantsuit . Hey, macron. Oolala. Parlezvous iran . So sign up for darius lighthouses acting secretary school of acting today. And you can trust me, because im not only the theaters director. Ive also been understudying eric for years. laughter its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, americas got democrats. Plus, stephen welcomes naomi watts chicago mayor Lori Lightfoot and musical guest the raconteurs featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause cheers and applause . Stephen darius lighthouse. Ive got to get chance down. You have to teach me that one. Audience hey, thanks, everybody hello, up there. Hello, vicki. Please, have a seat, everybody. Thank you so much. Thank you thank you please, have a seat everybody. Welcome, everybody, down here, up there, way in the corner. Whats up, vicki . Welcome, one and all, to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause i feel the the same way. I feel the same way because its friday cheers and applause its got that friday feeling. You all earned it. Hope youre all having a good friday. Hope youre not having one of those freaky ones where you switch bodies with your mom. I dont know why i dont know why thats still legal . The president must be looking forward to the weekend, too. He had a very busy week launching his 2020 campaign. But in the middle of all it of it, he sat down to talk about the cover of time magazine. Its his 29th cover. The only one hes been on more is horny golfer. 29 times. 29 time covers is quite the feat. So, of course, trump still had to lie about it. According to the magazines editor in chief, the president has said that hes been on the cover of time more than anyone else. That isnt true. The record holder is richard nixon. Yes, nixons been on more magazines, but donald trump has been spanked by more magazines. applause everyone remember . Everyone remember . Whats the on the eve of his reelection kickoff, trump gave us a glimpse of his strategy. He says something controversial, campaign harvests the data. As one aide explained it trump blows the hole and, everyone runs into the breach, laughter which i think is a delicate way of saying theyve had to use the jaws of life to get him off the toilet. laughter trump also laughter executive time. Its called executive time. Trump also took the chance to brag about his friend group, showing off a handdelivered birthday letter sent from kim jongun. I know were all used to trumps friendship with kim jongun, but this is just weird. Why does he keep bragging about being pals with a mass murderer . as trump look look here. Hannibal lecter made me a macaroni valentine laughter wait. Im sorry. Those are teeth. Cute though let that image sink in right now. Of course, trumps got plenty of competition to be his competition, and ill give you the latest from the democratic primary in tonights doin it donkey style applause this week, the New York Times interviewed a huge group of candidates, asking them all the same 18 questions. Check out the graphics. Thats a lot of mouths. Its also the opening credits for the brady bunch oops all parents. Joe biden didnt sit for this, but we did learn a lot about everyone else. And seeing them all together raised some new questions for me, like, who the hell are you . Seriously, what is your name . And im gonna say. Dan . Or sean . Come on these two are exactly the same guy the times asked the candidates some lighter questions. Whats your comfort food on the campaign trail . When youre a vegan, that means lots of veggies on the go. Coffee. My favorite coffee is a mocha. Mints. Kind bars. I dont have a comfort food. I have a comfort drink, which is iced tea. Stephen oh, they are doomed. Mints . iced tea . Come on. Youre in america just say burgers or pizza or nachos or french fries or just chugging alfredo sauce straight from the jar comfort food applause pop open a can of hersheys. Chocolate jimmies. Just go to town on yourself with a spoon. Comfort food is what you eat because you ran out of xanax. But one candidate had the right take on comfort foods. Glass of whiskey at the end of the night . thank you, senator thank you, senator gillibrand, thank you for finally recognizing whiskey as a food. It is made of corn and it is my only source of fiber. The candidates were also asked how theyd handle the crisis of climate change, and the boldest plan came from congressman eric swalwell. First and foremost, i would host, in the united states, a climate summit. Theres the fighting spirit as swalwell this could end civilization as we know it, so ive rented some Conference Rooms and ordered some iced tea and mints. laughter the times also asked these candidates, who is your hero . And a lot of them picked the same guy. Politically, i would go with lincoln. Abraham lincoln. Abraham lincoln. Abraham lincoln. Certainly abraham lincoln. Stephen kind of a copout. Thats like saying my favorite band is the beatles, my favorite weather is sunny, and my favorite thing to do with my lungs is breathe. laughter but a few of the candidates chose a hero a little closer to home. Uh. My wife my wife. My wife right now. In many ways, my wife. Wow i mean, right now its, like, baker mayfield, the quarterback of the Cleveland Browns. laughter applause applause did he say baker mayfield, the quarterback of the Cleveland Browns . Tim ryan, the only way it could have been worse is if he had said i dont know, the last guys wife. She seems good. Tim ryan did bring up his wife when asked where he would go on his first trip as president. Europe. I would go to europe. In fact, i already teased my wife that within the first few weeks of getting sworn in, were going to have to go to europe and really rebuild our alliances in nato. Stephen why would you tease your wife like that, tim ryan . laughter we all know youre actually going to take baker mayfield. laughter jon oh, wow stephen the candidates were also asked about their nighttime routine. How many hours of sleep do you get a night . Not enough. Not enough. Just enough time to be able to have dreams at nighttime and Vision Statements during the daytime. Stephen what does that even mean . Ive got daydreams at nighttime, night dreams at daytime, and when pizzas on a bagel, you can have pizza anytime. cheers and applause true story. Jon yeah, its nice. Stephen steve but a big group of these candidates is still polling ahead of donald trump. Hes currently losing to joe biden, bernie sanders, elizabeth warren, kamala harris, and pete buttigieg. Or as trump calls them as trump sleepy, crazy, pocahonty, prosecutey, and the guy whose name starts with butt. with an advantage that large, theres no way the democrats can screw this up. Is something only people born after 2016 would say, because last weekend, we got a warning sign when the Democratic Party tried a little too hard to appeal to the youths with this tweet referencing a threeyear old beyonce song this is a whole mood. Text boy bye to get this exclusive wallpaper. That, of course, was the work of the democrats head millennial outreach, morris. laughter applause come on come on, democrats. The future of our country is at stake dont blow it trying to be hip this is like if paul revere stopped midride to tweet, isnt my horse low key thicc tho . Weve got a great show for you tonight. Naomi watts is here but when we come back meanwhile applause miller lite is brewed for great taste with only 96 calories and zero grams of sugar. So when ones done, its the perfect time to start another. Miller lite. Hold true. band playing cheers and applause Stephen Jon Batiste and stay human, everybody jon that was nice. Like, boom boom stephen joe, youre playing those drums so hard, its like they made you mad or something. No, im happy. Stephen youre happy, good, okay. Jon, naof naomi watts is here. Jon oh, yeah. Scream queen. Stephen shes in the new showtime series, plays Gretchen Carlson in the sho time series, the loudest voice. We had Russell Crowe on last night for it. Its amazing. Amazing series. Jon roger ailes. Stephen yeah, its about roger ailes and the rise of fox news. Good folks. laughter you know, i spend a lot of time handstitching you a bespoke suit of a monologue out of the biggest, finest news stories. I do it every night over there, my little sewing machine. But sometimes i like to gather up all the leftover fabric, sew the pieces together, slap some googly eyes on it, stick my arm up there, and perform the oneman puppet show that is my segment meanwhile. cheers and applause meanwhile they said it couldnt happen again. Cant stop you cant stop mile you cannot stop meanwhile. Bullets cant stop it. Meanwhile, big news for marvels fans. Avengers Endgame is headed back to theaters with new footage. Yeah finally, finally, something for all those fans who said, three hours is not long enough i want my bladder to rupture in the theater. So why the theatrical rerelease . Turns out its because endgame is just 45 million shy of the alltime Worldwide Box Office record. Oh, you think if you toss a couple extra scenes in a marvel movie, comic book fans are just gonna line up and fork over 45 million . You fools. Theyre going to fork over 100 million. Meanwhile, on tuesday 16. 5 tons of cocaine was seized at the philadelphia port, with an estimated street value of 1 billion. Its a good thing drug cartel kingpins are known for their forgiving attitudes. Hello, sir. Hello, sir. Did you see the news . Yeah. All 16 all 16 tons are gone. Anyway, i just started here a couple weeks ago, so do you think you could possibly maybe not dissolve me in a barrel of acid . Thank you. Thank you so much ha, yes, this is why pencils have erasers, sir ok, see you at the teambuilding retreat thank you. applause meanwhile, a woman in england asked her colleagues for a mariah carey cake for her birthday and instead received a marie curie cake. And here it is laughter applause happy birthday, siobahn we got you the haunted, baleful gaze of a female scientific pioneer slowly sacrificing her life for mankind. That is bleak. And whoever the baker is, youre not fooling anybody with those pink cupcakes up there. Thats like when your dad started wearing that hat after the divorce. as dad im not depressed. Look at my jaunty fedora. Meanwhile, an alabama man allegedly fed his attack squirrel meth to keep it aggressive. And just in case youre wondering, does the guy look exactly like i think he does . Yes, he looks exactly like you think he does. Also, why give a squirrel meth . I assumed squirrels were already on meth. They can sprint vertically up a tree with their bare hands to guard their collection of garbage they found in the park. laughter but theres a happy ending, folks. When authorities found the methedout squirrel, they released it into the wild. So now the woodland creatures have a new friend. Who never sleeps and is going to steal the mooses xbox. Meanwhile, teens. Oh, no what did you do this time, teens . New Research Suggests that phone use is to blame for horns growing on young peoples skulls. Thats right, smartphones are reshaping your childs skull. Not so worried about tide pods now, are you . laughter kind of nostalgic. Apparently, young people are looking down at their phones so much that theyre developing hornlike spikes at the back of their skulls, bone spurs caused by the forward tilt of the head. Okay, kids, dont panic. When donald trump tries to send you to fight in iran next month, those bone spurs are going to come in really handy. Well be right back with naomi watts. applause choices cat 1 look lil soups cat 2 theres the shreds cat 2 friskies has it all. cat 1 i want it all can i have it all . vo feed their fantasy. Friskies. vo you can win free friskies for a year. Learn how at friskies. Com ours is a proud bloodline. We hail from the battlefields to the badlands. From the mountains and the midtowns. From the islands to the highlands. And directly to those who understand. That when you get behind the wheel. Youre not just driving a jeep wrangler. Youre joining a family. Hey, this one looks like a chmm. On. 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If you have hepatitis b, do not stop taking biktarvy without talking to your doctor. Common side effects were diarrhea, nausea, and headache. If youre hivpositive, keep loving who you are, inside and out. Ask your doctor if biktarvy is right for you. Astermites,ctor if biwere on the move. 24 7. Roger. Hey rick, all good . Oh yeah, were good. Were good. Termites never stop trying to get in, we never stop working to keep them out. Terminix. Defenders of home. band playing cheers and applause stephen hey, everybody welcome back to the show friday . Ladies and gentlemen, my first guest is a twotime Academy Award nominee you know from the impossible, birdman, and king kong. She now stars as Gretchen Carlson in the loudest voice. Please welcome naomi watts applause cheers and applause stephen please, madam, please. Please, have a seat. Thank you. Thank you. Stephen nice to see you again. Thanks for coming back. Thanks for having me back you. Stephen look very glamorous this evening. Thank you. I dressed up for you. Stephen we know you as australian. Correct. Stephen but i understand you actually grew up in wales in a like a country girl in wales . Yes, on a farm, actually. Stephen how country are we talking . What kind of farm, sheep . Goats, actually. Stephen goats. Yes. My grandmother bred goats. Stephen really. Yeah. And we would milk them and be relegated to chores, like mucking the pens s. Stephen sure. What kind of goats are we talking here . Do you remember the breed . No. I sound luke a liar now. I was a kid i dont know. There were there were stephen they were new castle kieltys. Well done that sounds convincing. Stephen were you in a town or were you out in the countryside . We were out in the countryside. Stephen what was the nearest town . And was the name of that town like a bucket of cons nantz. Basically. Stephen welch is very difficult to pronounce. Was the nearest train station. Stephen wow you can say it . Stephen i did not know you spoke klingon. laughter . Stephen well, you got your big break in the 30s, i understand. So you paid your dues. In my 30s. laughter stephen king kong . Isnt king kong in the 30s . Thats true. Stephen if your 30s you got a big break. That means a lot of auditions before you got there. Yes. Stephen i had some terrible auditions. Really. Stephen awful. Nobody would employ me until my 40s. Can you remember the worst awe audition you had . Someone fell asleep in an audition. That was pretty much a bad one. Stephen do you remember what this was for . I do. Its the film that you would all recognize but im not going to do that. Stephen did you get the part . No stephen i dont know i mean how stephen its possible. When you look across the room and see the director nodding off, you basically are just thinking, ive got to get out of here. He hates me. Im so boring. This is so dull. Stephen maybe he finds you very soothing. Well. Stephen be positive about it. Yeah, right, well, it didnt go well. Stephen one exciting thing i just learned about you is that youre going to be in the prequel to game of thrones, which takes place, i understand, thousands of years before the present series just ended . Is that true . Do you know . laughter how about this you cant answer, right . Thats right, yeah. This is my poker face. Stephen do you know whether what i said is true . Im not asking you to say whether its true or in the. I do. I do know. But i wont let on. Stephen it takes place in valorria, right . Thats what it is. I can tell. You can say anything. You can try. You can try. Stephen really, you can say anything . We can keep going here. Stephen over the very, very, very south, whatever that continent is. Do you know anything about game of thrones. Stephen yes, i watched the whole thing. Stephen did you enjoy the end . Yes, im not one of those people saying, do, it again. Glvment theyre right. Im saying show me a sequel or a prequel with naomi watts thousands of years before in valarria, which we just confirmed is whats going to happen. I did not stephen yes, did you. You just confirmed we are going to edit out all of your denials. laughter do you you are known as a as a scream queen. Yes. Stephen maybe the scream queen because youve done enough horror films where you have to scream in them. Yes, ive done lots of them. Stephen were very good at it. Im not going to ask you to scream right now. I can. Stephen you can . Well, i mean cheers and applause is this mine. Stephen do you oh, yes, it is yours. Do you need some prompting . It depends. What do you want . What kind of scream count . There are many different theres a scared kind of help me scream . Document a im going to, you know, like go crazy . Or or do you want this is so fun scream . Stephen give me so fun. Give me so fun first. Oh, you want me to do more than one . Im going to burn out. laughter this is stephen all right, youre brushing your teeth in the bathroom mirror. Yeah, okay. Stephen you look down to spit out the toothpaste. You look up, and there is a just a screaming skull over your theres just a cackling skull over your shoulder in the mirror. screaming cheers and applause stephen you know what . I hope i didnt bloat mic there, guys. Stephen i really want that to be my ring tone now. laughter well, now, ive actually started watching this is an incredible series on showtime, the loudest voice. Its about roger ailes and sorting of the birth and growth of fox news and what happened to his career. And you play Gretchen Carlson, the woman who took him down. Correct. Stephen what did you what did you find out applause did you talk with gretchen . You have talked with gretchen at all . Uhm, we had to rely on gabe sherman for our research. Stephen his book. 600 people, and thats what we based it on. Stephen what you can find most compelling about her story about how she took him down . I mean, she was operating in a place where women were not only not moving head. They were undervalued. They were bullied. They were sexually harassed. And she got to a point where she said, no, this is not okay. And she pushed back. She wanted promotions. Shes very good at her job. She was at the peak of her career and high ratings. And she kept getting pushed down. She said, no thats not going to happen. Stephen we have a clip here of you talk ago your character talking with ailes, placed by Russell Crowe. Anything we need to know to set this up . Yes, she wants to shes putting herself out there because shes feeling the vibe that shes not being pushed forward. The men are, and shes taking care of herself. Shes saying, i want what theyre getting, so give it to me. Stephen jim. So, mccains coming on fox friends last week. Doocy has had the last three interviews. I want this one. Gretchen, im quite sure you should be speaking to your e. P. I dont do the bookings. I have. And you thought it it was okay to just go over her head and talk to me directly . I think we should give you a shot. laughs thank you, roger. You wont regret it. Stephen wow. That kind of makes your skin crawl just to watch. Yeah. applause yeah, exactly. There are many skincrawling moment s. Stephen now, Russell Crowe, also australian, i assume you guys knew each other because there are only a couple people in australia, right . Did you guys know each other as actors . We did, we did. Actually, this is not the first time we worked together. We did a show another miniseries called brides of christ. I noticed from them and he was at the beginning, very beginning as was i but he was just incredible and weve become friends and weve kind of grown up together. He stayed with me, actually, when he first came to l. A. When he was auditioning. Stephen he crashed on your couch . Yeah, yeah. Stephen wow. He owes me money, actually. laughter i mean, should have been paid for that. Stephen hes on this week, right . Hes on tomorrow. You can tell him . Stephen how much are we talking . I feel like just put some money in the pot. You know, like, 25 or something for some grocery s. Stephen sure, ill get it from him. The last time you were here you were filming a movie thats out now. Its called ophelia. Correct. Stephen ands it was set in prague, which is an amazing city. Yes. Stephen how much time did you get to spend there . Six weeks, eight weeks, maybe. Its a beautiful, beautiful city. Stephen im interested in this movie because its hamlet told from ophelias point of view . Yes. Stephen even sadder. No, quite differently, actually. We turn it on its head. Its female driven, and shes in charge of her life and making her own decisions for herself. Stephen and youre gertrude, hamlets hom. Thats right. Stephen are you a heavy in this one, too . Gertrude does not come out well in the original. No, shes a confusing character, and still a little bit questionable. But shes much better in this. You can see shes definitely more three dimensional, i would say. Stephen do you murder your husband in this one, too . Yes. laughter we we we dont eye dont stephen thats the highly questionable part. It happens. The murder takes place, but the questions are not completely answered. Stephen does it happen thousands of years before in valorria . Lauz well done. Well done. Youve got your arm out nicely. The loudest voice starts june 30 on showtime, and ophelia is in theaters june 28. Naomi watts, everybody well be right back. At panera, our salads with peakseason berries. Creamy avocado. And a dressing fit for a goddess. Come taste what a salad should be. And order online for delivery right to you. Panera. Food as it should be. Hey, who are you . Oh, hey jeff, im a car thief. What . im here to steal your car because, well, thats my job. 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The 2019 nissan kicks. cheers and applause stephen hey, everybody, welcome back to the show ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is the new mayor of chicago, and after a historic win, shes the first black woman and the first l. G. B. T. Q. Person to hold that position. Please welcome mayor Lori Lightfoot applause cheers stephen yushes, thanks for being here. Oh, its my pleasure. Stephen i understand your niewntyearold mother was at your inauguration. Yes. Stephen what did that mean to her and to you for her to be there and see your historic win . Well, i it was awesome for me. My parents sacrificed a lot to put me in a position to be able to take advantage of opportunities. And for her to be able to see it, coming from a small town and everything that weve gone through in our life, it was a pretty awesome moment. Stephen well, as the i lived in chicago for 11 years, and i have so many happy memories. But there are there are conflicts in chicago. There are people that people argue about all the time there. Well get to some of the serious ones in just a moment. But lets start easy here. Whats your favorite deep dish in chicago . laughter . Gotta be pizanos. Stephen interesting, interesting. Some people would say ginos. Stephen some would say ginos east. Thats very interesting. Sox or cubs . Sox all the way. Im a soxside girl. Stephen just writing off the north side. Just writing off the north side right now. Now, chicago also has some very serious issues facing it. There have been 530 murders in chicago last year. Yeah. Stephen i know you talk them very seriously. What do you hope differently than mayor emanuel did before you, because this is not a new problem . No. Well, one of the things were doing is trying to focus every tool of City Government on making sure that were supporting the nawbds. Because what were experiencing is definitely a Public Health crisis. So were looking at the root causes of the violence, making sure that were, in effect, flooding the zones or the areas that are most distressed to make sure that were providing resources, jobs, economic development, but also just showing the young people in those neighborhoods that we care about them, that were going to provide them with opportunities to be part of the legitimate economy and doing everything we can to help support those neighborhoods. Stephen how does applause you describe you described all these gun deaths as a Public Health crisis. Yes. Stephen how does framing it that way, how does approaching it that way change it for you . It forces us to look at the root causes. We have neighborhood wheres Unemployment Rate is 25 or higher. Where 90 of the neighborhood depend on government assistance. Theres an absence of jobs, goodquality schools. And the things we take for granted that we know are the Building Blocks for really highquality neighborhoods, they dont exist in a lot of these places. So making sure that we are focused on really building up the quality of life in those neighborhoods, if we do that, were absolutely going to drive down the violence. Stephen people who are against any kind of gun legislation, say, well, chicago has strict gun laws. And they have terrible gun violence. What do you say to those people . Part of the challenge for chicago is were right next door to indiana, where you can literally drive across the border and get militarygrade weapons in any quantity without a background check and they bring them back into the city of chicago. So thats one of the challenges we face. Stephen so a piecemeal approach to gun control or gun regulation actually doesnt work. No, it doesnt work. Stephen it doesnt stop the flow. Because you cant stop every car driving back. We have to make sure we have a proactive strategy that engages our federal partners so we can look across borders but it has to be a comprehensive approach, making sure were focused not only in chicago but in gary, in indianapolis, in milwaukees and states that are the sources of the illegal guns thaend up on the streets of chicago. Stephen you had another big event in your life recently, besides ascending to the mayorship. You had dinner with oprah at her place in montecito there. applause is that more or less nerveracking than Election Night . It was it was definitely more nerveracking. Stephen shes awfully nice though . It was very, very nice. She was extremely generous, went to her house, had a great conversation, fabulous meal. Stephen this is you and your wife, amy, there. Did you get a present or anything . Did you get a car or anything . laughter sometimes she gives away stuff. I was hoping. I was looking for the keys. Stephen nothing . Just a good conversation and a great meal. Stephen i got a set of steak knifes. Im not going to brag. Maybe next time. Stephen now this is your first time running for elective office. Thats pretty impressive to hit it out of the park the first time. You have never run for anything in your life. Thats not exactly true. When i was in high school i ran for class president. Stephen did you win . I was fortunate enough to win. Stephen wow. And what was your was this senior year . I was president all three years of high school. And we ran on the platform of get on the right foot with lightfoot. It worked. Stephen there was any any, you know, were there any, like, you know, big promises, like, you know, build the wall . Were there any giant what was the biggest reap . One of the biggest issues and this will make sense for a high school audience we had terrible food in our lunch. So i led a boycott of the lunch room which, of course, turned into a food fight. laughter but that was our big claim to fame. Stephen so youre an agitator. Yeah, you know, you know. You have to be an advocate for your people. Stephen well, mayor, thank you so much for being here. My pleasure. Stephen give my best to chicago. Mayor Lori Lightfoot, everybody. Chicago, her honor. Well be right back with a performance by the raconteurs. Stick around. This is my body of proof. Man 2 proof of less joint pain. Woman 3 . And clearer skin. Man 3 proof that i can fight psoriatic arthritis. Woman 4 . With humira. Woman 5 humira targets and blocks a specific source of inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. Its proven to help relieve pain, stop further irreversible joint damage, and clear skin in many adults. Humira is the number one prescribed biologic for psoriatic arthritis. avo humira can lower your ability to fight infections. 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Stephen their new album, help us stranger, came out today performing bored and razed, please welcome back to the late show, the raconteurs cheers and applause rolling a juke joint box in the corner trolling myself in the mirror at night keeping an eye on my grindstone future staying away from the left and the right california born and raised but these days shes living with another plastic features, perfect face what a waste and im still thinking of her laying the cardinal laying the cardinal sins on the table pouring the coffee out on the grounds changing the losses to wins if im able switching the pitch to an audible sound running the rounds of the mundane soldier trading the cards and erasing the names feeling a pounding, insane colder sounding system feeding the flames well im detroit bored and razed but these days im living with another you tell me she can be replaced but thats not the case im so lost without her rolling a juke joint box in the corner trolling myself in the mirror at night keeping an eye on my grindstone future staying away from the left and the right cheers and applause stephen thank you, jack the raconteurs, everybody well be right back. Stephen thats it for the late show. Join us next week for live shows following the democratic debates. Good night captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org are you ready yall to have some fun feel the love tonight dont you worry where it is you come from itll be all right its the late, late show